No Matter What

by Michelle Betham

  But to Layla they were empty words. She didn’t care. All she cared about was making India Walsh realise that life wasn’t perfect. Sometimes the things you wanted didn’t always want you back, Layla was beginning to see that now. But she had to remember why she was doing this. If she couldn’t have Michael Walsh - and it certainly looked as if that was the case - then she didn’t see why India should have him either.

  ***

  “Are you ok?” Reece asked, sitting down beside India as she rocked Ethan in her arms.

  She looked at her father. “Yeah. I’m fine. Considering.”

  “I saw you talking to Kenny. Is everything alright?”

  “I’m jumping through hoops with joy, dad, what do you think?”

  “I’ll ignore that because you’re obviously tired.”

  “Well spotted.”

  “Drop the sarcasm, India. It doesn’t suit you. This is serious. First thing tomorrow we need to get started on sorting this whole mess out. Sooner rather than later.”

  “I know,” she sighed, rubbing Ethan’s back as she lay him over her shoulder. He was starting to cry and she knew it was because he was over tired. She knew how he felt. She just wanted to curl up and go to sleep too. “Have you seen his dummy...? Oh, thanks Emma.” She took the dummy from Emma and put it in Ethan’s mouth as he closed his eyes and leaned into her.

  “Do you want me to take him for a minute?” Reece asked.

  India nodded, handing him over. “Please. I’ll go get him a bottle. He’ll be needing a feed before bed anyway.”

  “I can do that if you like, honey,” Martha said, joining them. “It’s no trouble.”

  India smiled. “No. It’s ok. I’ll only be a few minutes. And I could do with some fresh air.”

  “Well, if you’re sure.”

  India kissed her step-mum’s cheek and smiled again. “I’m sure. Back in a bit.”

  She walked back over to the main house, wrapping her arms around herself as the cool night air hit her. Everyone around her still seemed to be having a good time. She didn’t know where Michael had gone though. He’d disappeared from the marquee and he didn’t seem to be outside either. Neither was Kenny.

  Walking back into the house, she decided to go and see if Michael was around before she got Ethan’s bottle ready. If he really did fancy that early night then she reckoned she was going to take him up on the offer. Emma was staying over so she could look after Ethan, which meant there was nothing stopping them from skipping the rest of this party and escaping.

  The door to his study was slightly open and India stuck her head around it to see if he was in there, sniffing the air. Had he been smoking? There was a definite smell of stale smoke in there. She walked inside, picking up the empty glass from his desk and tipping the cigarette butt into the waste bin, going over to the window and opening it slightly to let some air in. She’d have to have a word with him about this. She just hoped he hadn’t started up that habit again.

  Turning around she began picking up odd bits of rubbish that had accumulated on his desk. Michael had a habit of leaving things lying around rather than putting them in the bin so she might as well do a bit of tidying up while she was here. She hated any kind of mess.

  As she picked up the last of the scrunched up pieces of paper she noticed an envelope with “Private and Confidential” stamped on it in bright red letters. Couldn’t be that private, she thought, if he’d left it lying about. Maybe she shouldn’t touch that one though. She threw the rubbish into the bin and started to walk out of the office but something made her turn around and walk back over to that envelope. There was a piece of paper lying underneath it, and even though she knew she really shouldn’t touch it she couldn’t help herself. It was almost as if something was compelling her to pick it up, and if he’d wanted to keep it that private surely he’d have put it away somewhere, wouldn’t he?

  Reaching over, she pulled the sheet of paper out from underneath the envelope, sitting down on the edge of the desk as she looked at it, her hand suddenly flying to her mouth as she realised just what it was she was holding. And that’s when her whole world stood still.

  CHAPTER 48

  “What’s on your mind, honey?” Martha asked Reece as she cradled Ethan in her arms. There’d been times, over the course of the day, when he’d seemed miles away.

  “Sorry?” Reece looked at Martha and smiled. “I’m fine, really.”

  “I’m not stupid, Reece. I can see something’s on your mind. What is it?”

  Reece leaned forward, clasping his hands together as he watched everything going on around him. He couldn’t keep this from Martha, she was his wife. And he needed to talk to somebody about it.

  “It’s India,” he sighed. “She slept with Kenny Ross, back in Vegas.” He looked at Martha again. “Around the time she was trying to get pregnant.”

  Martha shook her head. “Oh, Reece ... no. Don’t tell me ...”

  He sat back, pushing his hands through his hair, sighing heavily again. “Yep. She’s not 100% sure who Ethan’s real father is.”

  “When ... when did you find this out?” Martha asked, holding Ethan even closer.

  “When I was talking to Kenny at the bar, earlier on. He told me.”

  “Oh baby ... no wonder your mind’s been all over the place. But ... Michael? Does he have any idea?”

  Reece shrugged. “I doubt it. If he did I don’t think he would have sat back and done nothing.” He turned to look at Martha. “She’s acting like this is something she can just brush under the carpet, it’s as though she’s got no idea how serious this really is. She knows we have to sort it out, I’ve spoken to her, but it doesn’t seem as though it’s sinking in, and I don’t know where to start, Martha. I don’t have the first clue how to go about this in the right way. I really don’t.”

  She reached out and took his hand, squeezing it gently. “I think this is something we all need to sleep on, Reece, don’t you? It’s been a long day.”

  He closed his eyes and nodded.

  “And then tomorrow, for the sake of this little boy here, we start to deal with this. In the most discreet way that we possibly can.”

  ***

  India sat down and looked at the sheet of paper again, scanning the words in front of her.

  “Michael Jonathan Walsh is the biological father of Ethan Michael James Walsh.”

  “Oh God,” she whispered. “Oh, thank God!”

  But once the relief of finding out Michael was Ethan’s real father wore off, the reality began to sink in. What was he doing with this? For him to have had this done must mean he’d had doubts about Ethan’s paternity in the first place. Did he know about her and Kenny? Oh Jesus, no, he couldn’t, could he? India’s head was spinning. What exactly did Michael know? And how? How did he know? How had he found out?

  She felt numb. If he did know, and he must do - there was no other explanation for him having the test done - how long had he known?

  She felt tears start to run down her face and she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. If she’d thought things had been a mess before then that was nothing compared to what they were now. She had to talk to him. So many questions - so many ...

  She had to talk to Michael. But what the hell was she supposed to say? And why hadn’t he said something to her? If he knew she’d slept with Kenny why hadn’t he said anything? She felt sick. This wasn’t real, it couldn’t be happening. She was in danger of losing everything she’d ever loved and she had no idea what to do next. She had no idea at all. So many secrets were slowly being exposed and she was scared. More scared than she’d ever been in her life.

  Sliding the piece of paper back under the envelope she left it where it was and got up, leaving the study and running upstairs to their bedroom. She splashed cold water over her face, trying to take away the redness from her eyes, she didn’t want anyone, least of all Michael, to know she’d been crying because now wasn’t the time to have the conversation she really needed to
have. There were too many people around. She needed to get back down to the party, make sure Ethan was alright. That’s what she needed to do. So she re-applied her make-up, brushed her hair through and composed herself, even though her head was a mess. She didn’t know what to do. Confusion was the only thing she was feeling right now but she had to control that. She had to make out she knew nothing. For now.

  As she made her way back downstairs, past Michael’s study again, she saw Layla Boyd walking towards her.

  “What are you doing in here?” India asked, almost not caring if she was honest. Her mind was on way more important things.

  Layla stopped and smiled at her. “I was looking for you.”

  “Well, you’ve found me. What do you want?”

  Layla reached into her oversized designer handbag and pulled out what looked like a DVD, handing it to India. “This is for you.”

  India turned it over in her hands. “What is it?”

  “I think you should watch it.”

  India looked at her. “Why?”

  Layla just smiled that smile and turned round, starting to walk away. “Just watch it India. I think you’ll find it interesting.”

  “Layla ...?” India looked at the DVD again but it was just a plain disc, no label, nothing. What the hell was she going on about? She went back into Michael’s study and threw the disc into a drawer before looking again at the piece of paper that contained the DNA test result. Shouldn’t she just confront him with it tonight? Part of her wanted to but it really wasn’t the time. So she left it where it was and made her way back outside to the party, not even looking around for Michael anymore because she wasn’t even sure how she was going to react when she saw him. She just wanted her baby. The beautiful baby who had the father she’d always wanted for him. At least now she knew who his daddy was. The one positive thing to come out of this whole complicated mess. How the rest turned out was anyone’s guess.

  ***

  Michael stood next to Kenny at the bar. “I need a word.”

  “With me?” Kenny asked, putting his empty beer bottle down on the bar.

  “Yes. With you.”

  Kenny looked at Michael. “Come on then. What’s up?”

  “Somewhere more private, I think. I don’t particularly want anyone else to hear this.”

  Kenny wasn’t going to argue. He wasn’t in the mood. If Michael wanted a word he could have one, then Kenny was seriously thinking of getting out of here. He’d had enough for one night. Maybe after a good night’s sleep everything in his head might start to look a little clearer.

  Michael led the way into the house and into his study, shutting the door behind the two of them and walking over to his desk.

  Kenny looked around the room. He’d been in this house so many times but he’d never been in here. The door was usually always locked, but it was just how he’d imagined Michael Walsh’s study to look - dark walls, wood flooring, and a huge oak desk at one end behind which was a large, black leather chair and huge bay windows covered by dark wooden Venetian blinds. There were pictures of Ethan all over the place, and on the walls were photographs of India – an oversized framed black and white photograph of her lying naked - bar some killer heels - on a bed, taken from her ‘Viper’ shoot back in 1996, just after she and Michael had got together; and one of her when she’d been quite heavily pregnant. In that one she was also naked. He seemed to like naked pictures of his wife, but then, who wouldn’t?

  “She’s beautiful. Isn’t she?” Michael asked, noticing Kenny looking at the photographs on the wall.

  Kenny looked away immediately, folding his arms and leaning back against the wall.

  “But she’s mine, Kenny. Do you understand? India is mine.”

  “What the hell is all this about?”

  Michael walked around the front of his desk and leaned back against it, resting his hands on the edge.

  “I know all about you and her, Kenny. I know all about that brief … affair – is that what you’d call it? - back at the beginning of 1997, and I know all about that night in Vegas.”

  Kenny couldn’t say anything. He didn’t know what he’d been expecting Michael to say but it hadn’t been this. Had he said anything to India? Something told him he hadn’t.

  Michael reached behind him and picked up a piece of paper from his desk. “You might want to take a look at this.”

  “What is it?”

  Michael held it out to him. “Take a look. It’s something you need to see.”

  “Do I?”

  Michael continued to hold out the piece of paper and Kenny walked towards him, carefully taking it from him.

  “Read it.”

  Kenny looked down at the sheet of paper, scanning the words on it, reading them slowly.

  “It’s all there in black and white, Kenny. Ethan ... he’s my son. Just like India is my wife.”

  Kenny looked up. He didn’t know what to feel. He couldn’t even get his head around what was happening here. “I ... I don’t understand.”

  Michael folded his arms, continuing to lean back against his desk, looking straight at Kenny.

  “You may have some kind of hold over my wife that I can’t break and that’s fine. I can deal with that. I can deal with you being her friend because I can’t stop that. Not without India getting suspicious. But you forget any ideas you might still have about anything else happening. You don’t touch her in that way again, you don’t even think about it.”

  Kenny narrowed his eyes as he looked at Michael. “And what about India? What about what she wants?”

  “She wants me,” Michael said, his expression never changing.

  “You know that for sure, do you?”

  Michael laughed. “You can’t win this one, Kenny. Not anymore. It’s over. Oh, I suspect that you had some idea that if Ethan was yours then maybe India would finally come running to you, but even if that had been the case, even if this test had showed that he had been your son, then she would never have known.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “You’d have dropped the whole subject, Kenny. You’d have let it go. And I would have made sure that she thought Ethan was mine. But, hey, we don’t need to bother with all that now, do we?”

  Kenny stared at him. “You’re fucking crazy.”

  Michael shrugged. “I love my wife, that’s all. I’ve loved her from the second I saw her and without you in the way she would have been mine far sooner. But you got in the way, and I sat back and watched you blow the one chance you had with her but that’s it now. It’s over. You lost. And you will always lose against me, Kenny. I can promise you that.”

  “I’m not out of her system yet, Michael. Vegas proved that. You know, she didn’t take that much persuading to let me fuck her.”

  Before Kenny realised what was happening Michael had punched him hard, sending him reeling backwards against the wall.

  “You talk about her like that again … don’t push me any further.” Michael’s voice was steady, despite the increasing anger he was feeling. “I put up with it all, all the lies she told me, all the times I knew she was with you, I put up with it all because I love her so much it fucking hurts, and in the end she always came back to me, but that’s not enough anymore. I want her with me without the threat of you. So you will not get in the way again. I won’t let it happen.”

  Kenny put his hand to his jaw, feeling blood between his fingers. “You can’t stop anything from happening, what kind of fucking power trip are you on?”

  Michael moved closer to Kenny, his eyes serious as he stared at him. “Finish it, Kenny. Any ideas still left that in pretty-boy head of yours regarding my wife, you forget them now. Or, believe me, what’s happening here is just for starters.”

  “Are you threatening me?”

  Michael smiled, a smile that definitely didn’t reach the eyes, as he slowly backed away from Kenny. “Call it a, friendly warning.”

  Kenny wiped his mouth with the back of his hand,
tasting blood from the cut on his lip as he did so. This guy was out of his mind.

  “She’ll never stay with you, Michael. Not when she finds out what kind of crazy bastard you are.”

  Michael walked over to the table in the corner and poured himself a drink, turning round to look at Kenny.

  “The only thing I’m crazy about is that woman out there. She’s my life. Her and our little boy are my life and you are not going to take that away from me. You had your chance, Jesus, she married you and you threw that away!”

  “But she still comes back for more.”

  “Because you let her. But you won’t do that again.” Michael looked straight at him. “Will you?”

  Kenny just shook his head, his hand still on his now throbbing jaw. “Do you really care about her? Or is this just some game to you?”

  “Oh, this is no game, Kenny, believe me. I care about her more than you or anyone else will ever know and I’m not letting her go. I won’t lose her to you, not to anyone. But especially not to you. Now, I think it’s time you left this party, don’t you?”

  Kenny turned to leave. He’d had enough for one night anyway, he just needed to sleep. He’d always known there’d been something about Michael Walsh that wasn’t right, something he’d never felt comfortable around and now he’d finally had the proof.

  “Oh, and, Kenny?”

  Kenny turned round and looked at Michael as he stood there, one hand in his pocket, the other clutching his drink, his face expressionless again. “You tell India nothing about this. Do you hear me? Because if you do, I’ll know about it.”

  Kenny just gave him one last look and left, closing the door behind him.

  Michael watched him leave, finishing his drink and leaning back against the table, closing his eyes for a second. His hand was shaking as he put down the empty glass, looking up at the photographs of India on the wall. She was worth it. She was worth it all, all the pain and the heartache and the times when he’d known she was with Kenny Ross, she was worth every second. Because he had her now. Ethan was his son, India was his wife, and that was all Michael had ever wanted. Now it was time to put the past behind them and move forward. Because surely, after tonight, there could only be good times ahead. In Michael’s mind there was no doubt about that. Kenny would leave India alone, and they could finally get on with being the family he’d always wanted them to be. Surely nothing – nothing – could stop that from happening now. Nothing that Michael could think of, anyway.