by Bry Ann
Slowly, trying to refocus my vision, I look up at him, trying to decipher between the two of him I’m seeing.
“You’ll be fine. Just—”
BANG!
The sound of a door being kicked in ricochets in the apartment. Rod immediately snatches a gun and runs off. I’m so dizzy I keep bumping into stuff as I scramble for the closet. I have to throw my head between my knees when I get there. I’m spinning.
I hear the rumbling of voices, then Rod’s growl.
“Where the fuck did she go?”
“Probably protecting herself, because she’s smart.”
I know that voice. I know it. Think, Sage. Come on, brain.
“Princess,” the voice softens as it gets closer, “can you tell me where you are?”
There’s barely a beat then…
“I swear to fuck, if you hurt her, Rod…”
“She’s fine. You’re as annoying as she is.”
Princess.
Nix!
“Nix?” I whisper.
I grab a jacket off the hanger and send both to the floor with a quiet clang.
I know Nix will hear it.
“You stay here or I swear I’ll kill you,” Nix commands Rod with a coldness that sends chills down my spine.
Click. Click. Click.
I hear the quiet footsteps of him approaching, and then woosh!
The closet door is thrown open. It’s like he senses me, because his gaze immediately swings to me huddled in the back left corner behind the jackets. I see him, but he’s blurry. My head’s clearing a little, but everything is still fuzzy.
“Sage.” He immediately runs to my side. I see the moment he notices my hair. His eyes first flash with rage, then sympathy.
“Aw, shit, Sage… I’m sorry.”
His blue eyes reflect pools of pain as he takes a seat in front of me.
“Rod,” I whisper, trying to hide my hair from him.
Nix shakes his head. “He won’t do anything to you with me here.”
“But… what if he hurts you?”
He takes a deep breath.
“What did he do to you, brave girl?”
I duck my head and further try to hide my hair with my hands.
“I’m fine.”
I scrunch my lips, try to bury my dizziness and suppress the tears that he’s seeing me like this. So demeaned and ugly.
Again.
“No, don’t do that. Not with me. Do you hear me?”
He demands my gaze and earns it, all without words.
“With me, you’re honest. Yeah?”
I hesitate, letting my eyes pulse with unshed tears.
“Sage, don’t leave me. Please.”
The box Sage hasn’t been able to fully enter this time because of him combusts. Locking her out of it.
I crawl into his arms and hold on tight, grateful that at this angle, he can’t look at me anymore. He immediately wraps his arms around me and rubs my back.
“I’ve been so worried about you,” he murmurs tearfully.
“I’m sorry, Nix. I’m so sorry. I had a bad feeling about Ronald. I knew I shouldn’t go outside with him, but I was at my parents’ house. I just wanted to be normal. I thought…”
His hands come up through my hair. He slides one bracelet-clad hand over my lips.
“What have I told you about apologies?” he murmurs.
“You don’t like them, but they’re gonna use this against you. They’re gonna torment you with what happened. My hair —”
“Shh… shh… let me worry about that. How about I get you home?”
“Home?” I whimper.
“Come here.”
He scoops me up in his arms like I’m nothing but a little kitten and cradles me against his strong chest. I fist his t-shirt in my hands. He looks down at me and gives me a tight-lipped smile. When we get into Rod’s room, I tuck my head into him.
“Aaron’s gonna destroy you both ‘cause of that thing in your arms.”
My body locks up at the sound of Rod’s voice.
“Let me worry about that,” Nix says coldly. “Get out of my way, Rod.”
There’s a standoff between the two men. I risk a peek out when I feel Nix’s fingers twitching against me.
“Let’s just go,” I whisper. “Please, Nix.”
Nix makes a sound from low in his throat and literally charges forward, shoving Rod aside.
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you,” Rod calls out.
Nix pauses on the porch. “I don’t want one damn thing from you, Rod. Not your warnings, nothing.”
With that, he storms forward. I feel my body trembling in his hold, but I wish it wasn’t. I know it’s only fueling Nix’s pain and anger.
By the time we get to the passenger door of Nix’s modest sedan, he’s a ball of tension.
“Nix…” I start. He cuts me off.
“It’s okay. Don’t worry.”
I am worried. Of course with the utmost care, Nix opens the door and deposits me in the seat. He looks me over once. I know he’s checking for blood or signs of injury, but my hands fly to my hair to block it from him. I need a hat or something. His eyes immediately flicker up at that. He races to his side of the car, gets in, and slams the door.
“Look at me right now, Sage.”
I shake my head and look down, twisting my fingers in my lap.
“Sage!”
I wince and slowly look up.
“Six years...”
“I know —”
He holds up a hand. “Six years I’ve known you. A little over. Have I ever once given you anything to indicate that I find you anything but beautiful?”
“No, but —”
“There’s no buts. Don’t hide from me. Don’t leave me. I need you.”
He doesn’t say another word before throwing the car in drive and speeding off.
“It’s just… my hair,” I murmur. “You love my hair.”
“No, I love you. Shave the hair. I don’t give a fuck.”
I look down at my lap and don’t say anything else. Once in a while, I feel Nix’s gaze shift my way before going back to his own bubble of tension. It’s not until we are parked in our driveway that the tension breaks.
I force myself to be the one to break it. Even though I’m shaking, still slightly dizzy and more than happy to be back at my safe place, Nix needs me more than I need him right now.
I crawl over the console.
“Sage, stop. What are you…?”
He gives up with a sigh when I have his face between my hands.
“Thank you for coming for me.”
A whirlwind of emotion crosses his face. “I’ll always come for you, princess.”
I trace my finger down a little, studying all the little bits of his face that make him unique. All the lines, bits of stubbly facial hair, and scars.
“I didn’t know it was possible to feel this much for one person,” I murmur.
“You need to get off my lap, babe. Let’s go inside.”
Without thinking, I glance down. My cheeks heat when I see he’s hard.
“Oh, uh…”
I look up at him. He’s smirking at me. He gestures with his knee for me to get off.
I hesitate.
The ideas running through my head are hot as hell, but dumb. I could never… could I?
“Sage…”
I vaguely hear Nix’s voice, but my mind’s already lost in a memory. One of my favorite memories.
“Why do you wear so many bracelets, Nix? It’s like you can’t be without them.”
He grinned down at me, where my head was lying on his chest.
“You like my bracelets.”
“Yeah, I do, but I’ve always been curious why you wear them.”
His gaze shifted away from me. His muscles started to tighten, so I rubbed my hands across his chest, trying to calm him.
“They ground me. Sometimes Aaron can be… yeah, I just never know when he’s gonna pull s
omething. When I was a kid, I lost my shit on Aaron once. I mean, completely lost it. I’d never been that angry. It was two years after…”
He closed his eyes.
“It was after he had me kill for the first time. I was still having nightmares. I was a mess. I threw a punch and landed a kick to his dick. Then I grabbed a shovel and tried to smack him over the head with it. He caught the shovel in time… unfortunately. Mom suffered because of what I did. A stray dog I’d befriended suffered. I suffered. It was awful. Awful. I stole my first leather bracelet from this store a month later, ‘cause I thought it looked cool. I quickly found the feeling of it on my skin helped ground me when Aaron was around. I only take them off at night ‘cause I can’t risk Aaron doing something while I’m braceletless. I’m scared of the anger inside me. I guess you could say it’s my Pamela. Not that Pamela can be replaced,” he added quickly with a teasing smile.
“I hate him. I’m glad you got the dick kick in. Wish you’d landed the shovel, though.”
He chuckled. “Same.”
I slid up his body so I was in the crook of his neck and curled up.
“You’ve gotten bigger, you know? Your muscles, I mean.”
He laughed. “You noticed.”
“Hmm-hmm.”
I always notice, I remember thinking.
“Like it?”
“Are you fishing, Nix?”
“From you, yes. Absolutely.”
I crawled forward so my face was over his.
“I think you’re super sexy, Nix. There. Feel better?”
He groaned. “You can’t say shit like that to me.”
“But you just said—”
I was cut off by his lips crashing into mine. He spun me slowly so I was on the bed and he was leaning over me.
I moaned.
How does he feel so good?
I never remembered it feeling good in hell.
Very familiar tingles spread throughout my body.
“Nix,” I whimpered.
“What do you need?”
I looked up, but instead of his eyes, I caught a glimpse of his rock-hard dick. I bit my lower lip.
“Nix…”
“Shh,” he gently placed a finger over my lip. “What does Sage need?”
Him.
I needed him.
He was so, so fucking careful with me. He handled all my struggles like a pro.
“Be careful,” I remember whispering, terrified. “You don’t have to do this. I know I’m a mess.”
His fingers laced through mine. He didn’t need to use words when he looked at me.
“I got you, doll.”
“I know.”
It was the most beautiful night of my night. Not ‘cause it was perfect or ‘cause I wasn’t an absolute wreck, but because he loved me through it all. He loved me through it all, and in the wreckage that was my past, we created something truly beautiful and pleasurable.
“Sage…”
I leap forward and kiss him.
Nix
Whoa, what is she doing?
“Sage,” I mumble.
She pulls away. Her big green eyes are always so expressive. Such a dead giveaway for how she feels, but right now, there’s so much going through them that I can’t read her.
“What’s going through your mind right now, brave girl?”
“I just…. Well…” She bites her lower lip.
“Sage, did he hurt you? Be honest with me.”
A sort of puzzled expression crosses her exhausted face. Looking at her for real now, I see how tired she looks.
“This is going differently than I thought. I just… you’re… I wanted…”
She stammers on like that for a bit. I place my finger over her lips.
“I’m okay.”
She quickly glances down at my dick, which sends a rush of blood there.
“No, you’re—”
“I’m okay, angel. I promise. I swear.”
“I just want to help.”
She looks down with shame written all over her face. Six years, six years and still, since the introduction of sex into our relationship, I think she can’t quite compute that she doesn’t owe me sex. Ever. Not once. No matter what the circumstance is.
“Sage, look at me.”
She shakes her head. I feel a tear fall from her cheek to my thigh. She’s embarrassed and confused. Probably tired, hurting, and traumatized as well. Dulled rage hammers at my emotions, but I swallow them and force myself to be here with her where she needs me.
“Please, I need your eyes.”
She shakes her head quickly and sprints out of the car. I take a moment to get my head straight. To clear the anger I feel. As soon as I nailed down Sage’s location, no thanks to Aaron, I came for her. But I’m not okay. I’m far from fucking okay. I know Aaron’s gonna have Rod and his other goons use whatever they did to Sage against me. Not to mention, I have reason to believe Aaron’s gonna do something to Rose if I don’t get myself in line. But Sage… Right now, I have to deal with what my dad’s men just put her through. I have to get her to talk. The woman is a vault. She still has not discussed her time in the trafficking ring with anyone. She still barely sleeps. It’s amazing how five years can fly by so fast and change so little.
One foot at a time, I climb out of the car.
Sage is by the back door, bouncing on her toes, not looking at me. I give her a moment while I unlock the front door. The literal second I open the door, she flies in. She scampers around for a second before running to the bedroom door, then to the kitchen, then to the couch. She looks like an animal in a cage with no way out. Her lower lip wobbles as she scurries around.
“Sage.” I catch her wrist. Her hand trembles violently beneath my fingers. “Come here, sweetheart.”
“Nix, let me go. I… I wanna go to my dad’s. I…”
“Sage,” I murmur. “What are you doing?”
She squeezes her eyes shut and shuffles closer to me. When she’s close enough to grab, I carefully pick her up and bring her to the bedroom. I immediately place her on the bed and tuck her in. When she’s all tucked in, I crawl in and pull her into my side.
“It’s okay,” she stammers. “It’s still light out…”
“Shh, no talking. Sleep.”
“Sleep?”
“Yes, just listen to my voice and sleep.”
Her eyes flutter. “Never, under any circumstance, do you owe me anything for saving you,” I tell her, choosing my words carefully. Her eyes go to the covers.
“Sage, do you think you owe me for saving you?”
Her big eyes pulse with unshed tears as she slides further under the covers. With a sigh, I drop the topic and tuck her into me, safe.
“You never, ever owe me for anything, angel. Go to sleep.”
“I—”
“Shhh, sleep.”
“I’m not tired.”
I gently trace her nose.
“Sleep.”
“My dad?” she murmurs.
“I’ll call him. After you sleep.”
“What if Rod comes back?” she whispers tiredly.
My whole body tightens. “He won’t be bothering you anymore.”
“Whatever Rod did to me doesn’t matter, don’t let them use it against you. Nix, I…”
She’s out. I watch her whole body collapse into that coma she’s so well-known for. I doubt she slept much, if at all, while she was with Rod.
I gently rub her head. Such a tiny little person to own my entire, rugged heart.
“Sleep, princess.”
I kiss her head and slowly crawl out of bed. She won’t notice. As soon as I’m out of there, I quietly slip out the front door, to the porch, and click Charles’s number.
“Nix,” he barks.
“I have her.”
A sigh bursts out of him. “Was it Ronald?”
Tension laces his voice. I know he feels immense guilt that he hired a man employed by my father. I don’t blame the gu
y. No one knows how sneaky my father is better than me.
“I haven’t spoken with Sage yet. She’s a little… she needs sleep.”
He sighs. “It was. I know it was.”
“Well, let me handle all that. Sage needs us.”
“Nix,” his voice is stern. “I may not fully approve of the whole situation between you two, but she loves you. And you saved her life. Don’t get yourself killed, kid.”
“I won’t.”
“Tame your ego for all of ten seconds and listen to me.”
I can’t help but roll my eyes.
“I know what I’m doing.”
“So does Aaron,” Charles snaps. “I swear to fuck, Nix, I will spit on your grave if you die and leave Sage alone. She’ll lose herself forever.”
“I can’t risk him hurting her again. It’ll only be worse next time. She’s gonna be a prisoner in my home now. Five years, Charles. She needs to get out in the world.”
“She has that blog, right?”
“Yes, and it’s successful. But Sage needs to hike and see the mountains, get coffee on the boardwalk somewhere. She needs to go to the local park and see the stars. I don’t know… do shit. She needs to do shit. She needs to see the beauty in everything again. She hasn’t improved in five years and I can’t stand it anymore. I have to do something.”
Charles sighs. “Fuck, it’s sickening how much you two love each other. Can’t she love someone… easier?”
“I wish she did, Charles. Truly.”
“Even then…” he sighs, “you’re good to my daughter, Nix. If I truly had a complaint about you personally, you’d know.”
“I appreciate that.”
More than he could ever know.
“When can I see my daughter?”
“Let me just…” I hiss out a breath and… lose it. “Fuck, Charles. She was doing so well. Goddamnit! Fuck! Fuck!”
“Son, listen to me.”
“I should have—”
“Nixon!” Charles cuts me off with a shout. “Listen to me. We’ll figure it out. Whatever you need. I’m here. Aaron and his men aren’t invincible. Once he’s out of the way, you and Sage will have a future together. You’re not alone anymore, Nix.”
“I don’t want you to get involved with anything that involves—”
“Ahhhhh! Help! Help! Please!”
“I have to go right now.”
I slam the phone on Charles’s rushed voice, full of concern, and sprint into the house. I grab the gun I stashed on my person and charge into the room where Sage is sleeping.
