The Winter Garden

by Heidi Swain

  I nodded in response and he kissed my cheek before wandering off, leaving me feeling rather shell-shocked.

  ‘Was that Zak you were with?’ shouted Chloe, who then appeared arm in arm with Hannah.

  ‘Yes,’ I told her. ‘I owed him a bite to eat after fixing my sink.’

  Chloe didn’t say anything.

  ‘Nice to see you again, Hannah,’ I said. ‘I’m so, so sorry about last week.’

  ‘Doesn’t matter,’ she said, pulling Chloe closer. ‘It all got sorted in the end.’

  The pair grinned at each other and I was pleased my silly comment had been forgotten.

  ‘Have you seen anyone else?’ Chloe asked.

  ‘Everyone except for Finn,’ I told her. ‘I don’t think he’s coming. He certainly didn’t walk up with the rest of us.’

  I had wondered if he would be here already. His height ensured he would be easy to pick out in a crowd, but there was no sign of him. Not that I had really been looking.

  ‘Are you going to buy anything?’ Hannah asked me.

  ‘Yes,’ I said, holding up my reusable shopping bags. ‘I’m hoping to get most of my present-buying done tonight.’

  ‘Shall we look around together, then?’ Chloe suggested.

  ‘No,’ I said, ‘I’m all right on my own. I’ll see you in the pub.’

  ‘As long as you’re sure,’ she frowned.

  ‘Of course,’ I insisted. ‘Go on.’

  It didn’t take long to fill my bags with homemade edible treats, handmade crafts and unusual gifts, the likes of which you’d be hard pushed to find online. Considering the weight of the bags, versus the few people I had to buy for, I couldn’t help thinking that the person I had treated most was me. It didn’t happen all that often though, so I wasn’t about to feel guilty about it.

  When I had reached the point where I had so much crammed in my bags that I couldn’t put them down to look at anything else, I decided to call it a day and head for the pub. A lot of my neighbours had already decided to do the same and I squeezed into a seat at the table with Poppy and Jacob, Mark and Neil, Harold and a lady I hadn’t seen before, and Heather and Glen, who had managed to bag babysitters for the evening and were making the most of their child-free time. Lisa and John had already taken their three home and Graham, Carole, Luke, Kate, Jasmine and Abigail had gone with them. There was no sign of Chloe and Hannah or Zak and Finn.

  ‘So,’ said Neil, who had kindly squeezed closer to his husband, Mark, to make room for me, ‘how are you settling into life in Nightingale Square, Freya?’

  ‘Very well, thank you,’ I told him, ‘and I absolutely love working in the garden.’

  ‘Luke was saying earlier,’ commented Mark, as he leant around Neil, ‘how pleased he is with it all. He said you were bringing it back to life and that the new Winter Garden is already looking amazing.’

  I felt my face flush with pleasure. I hadn’t said as much, but I thought that it was looking good too, and it was wonderful to know that Luke was happy enough to be talking about it to other people. Deciding to get Graham on board had been a good call. Not only had he fixed the ride-on but he could keep pace with Chloe, and that had made a big difference to what we could achieve within the limited time we had before the official opening.

  ‘It’s all coming together really well,’ I told Mark, with a smile. ‘Give it a season or two and it will be even better.’

  ‘And how’s the kitchen?’ Harold shouted across the table.

  ‘All sorted,’ I told him, ‘and no harm done.’

  He gave me a thumbs up and went back to talking to his companion.

  ‘Let me go and get you a drink,’ Neil kindly offered.

  I looked over to the bar, which was at least three deep with people waiting to get served. If he joined them, he’d be there until closing time.

  ‘No, I’m fine,’ I said, ‘but thank you for offering. I really should be heading home.’

  ‘Are you sure, Freya?’ said Heather, catching the tail end of what I had said.

  ‘Yes,’ I said, ‘I’ve got a really early start tomorrow.’

  ‘Do you want us to walk with you?’ Glen generously offered.

  ‘No,’ I told him, gathering up my bags. ‘It’s not all that far. I’ll be all right.’

  I said my goodbyes and pushed my way back out into the chilly night air. The carnival was still in full swing, but suddenly I wasn’t enjoying it. The lights, music and laughter couldn’t lift my spirits as I made my way home, the faces of my neighbours around the pub table and those who had already left, swimming in front of me.

  I never usually took any notice of the fact that I was on my own, and I certainly wasn’t the sort of person who needed a relationship to complete me, but I can’t deny that, in that moment, I felt an unexpected pang of loneliness. I was the only one among us that evening who had been alone.

  It hadn’t bothered me when I was shopping, but suddenly I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Even Nell had Gus to keep her company and Peter who had sent me photos of his few days away, had a new love too. The woman from the restaurant, Rebecca, had featured, smiling and happy, in almost all of the images.

  As I made the final turn into Nightingale Square and looked across the road to Prosperous Place, I wondered if that was why Finn had decided not to join in. Was he lonely too? He always came across as pretty self-contained to me – alone, but not lonely – there was a very definite difference between those two states and I went to bed feeling sad to realise that for some reason I was suddenly experiencing the latter.

  Chapter 18

  The next day dawned bright, sunny and crisp, but I struggled to raise my spirits high enough to match the effort the weather was making. The evening before had started off so well and I had thoroughly enjoyed the larger part of it, but I couldn’t shake off the feeling that it would have been all the better if I’d had someone to share it with.

  I had told myself time and time again that I wouldn’t concern myself with thoughts of Finn but I couldn’t stop wondering if he hadn’t attended the carnival for the same reason. I wasn’t supposed to be worried about finding any common ground between us, but was this it?

  Were we actually more in tune than we first thought, and after our kiss, increasingly aware that we were very much on our own? However, it didn’t take me many minutes at work to stop speculating because that clearly wasn’t the reason behind why he had missed out on the festive fun.

  As was my habit, on the last morning of every working week, I made a tour of the garden, mentally ticking off all the things which had been achieved and committing to memory all those which still needed addressing. However, my list-making went rather awry when I reached the fern garden.

  Tucked away, but not so hidden that you wouldn’t notice them, I found two dragon sculptures. The first caught my eye as I entered, because the light bounced off it. It was attached to the wall, had its wings outstretched and was looking over its shoulder to check that whoever had spotted it wasn’t in too hot pursuit. The second was harder to find, but having discovered one, I knew there’d be another and I eventually found it, menacingly crouched in an alcove in the wall at the furthest end of the little secret place. It was close enough to the path to admire but not so close that it would be subjected to inquisitive hands.

  Just like the one scaling the wall, it was made from all manner of metal materials, cogs, coils and springs. There were no softened or rounded and smoothed edges like there were on the hares. These were far more ferocious-looking beasts; all raw edges and sharp points. The real deal, straight from the pages of Tolkien and Carroll.

  As mesmerising and enchanting as they were, I was annoyed to find them. Finn and I were supposed to be working out where to put his sculptures together and I hadn’t even been aware that he’d already created this pair. I abandoned my recce of the garden and made straight for the meadow lawn. Just as I suspected, there were the three hares.

  So, this little after-dark mission was
the reason why Finn hadn’t put in an appearance at the Christmas carnival. He wasn’t worried about feeling lonely amongst a crowd at all, he was just feeling petty. After our crossed swords at the house I had been resolved to let my efforts at friendship go, but I was still willing to maintain our professional partnership, but not now.

  He knew how passionately I felt about the hares, he had been moved enough by my reaction to seeing them for the first time to take me in his arms and quite literally sweep me off my feet. He had kissed me with a force I’d never before experienced and now, because for some reason he was going out of his way to pretend it hadn’t happened, he had snuck out in the night and positioned the sculptures without me. He had known full well that I had been looking forward to placing them and he’d done it on his own. It was as if he didn’t want me to be a part of the magic.

  I squatted down to look at the hares through the grass. It wasn’t as long as it would be during the summer, but my hunkered-down position gave an idea of how it would all look in a few months’ time. Pretty spectacular was the conclusion I grudgingly came to. Even Nell was admiring the trio, with her head cocked to one side or, given her doggy genetics, perhaps she was sizing them up for another reason?

  ‘What do you think?’

  The voice calling from further along the path belonged to my boss and he sounded impressed, as well he might.

  ‘I spotted them from upstairs in the house,’ he beamed, shoving one arm into his tatty old gardening jacket as he juggled a slice of jammy toast. ‘The light catches them beautifully, don’t you think?’

  ‘They’re stunning,’ I agreed, because I couldn’t deny their beauty.

  ‘And this is just the spot for them,’ Luke carried on, now striding backwards and forwards to look at them from all angles as he bit into his toast. ‘Well done to the pair of you for picking it.’

  ‘Well…’ I began, ‘I might have…’

  ‘And facing them that way,’ he chewed and swallowed, ‘I never would have thought to put them that way around.’

  He was going to have indigestion at this rate.

  ‘That part really was all down to Finn,’ I said, no doubt sounding a little sulky.

  We might have decided where the hares were going to go, but I had played no role in the final positioning of them.

  ‘I suppose that’s fair enough,’ Luke grinned, rubbing his crumby hands down his jeans. ‘After all, the artist knows his work better than anyone else, right?’

  I didn’t comment.

  ‘And there’s no damage to the grass or paths,’ he carried on, looking around, blissfully unaware of my bullish mood. ‘How did you manage that?’

  ‘I wasn’t here,’ I shrugged. ‘I’m as surprised to find them here as you are.’

  The sculptures were heavy and yet there was no evidence as to how they had been transported from the studio. How had Finn managed that? Perhaps he’d employed some kind of levitation spell. He certainly looked like a god, maybe he really was one?

  ‘Finn!’ Luke shouted, spotting the deity himself. ‘Oh mate,’ he enthused. ‘These look spectacular. They’re even better than I could have imagined, and you know I had pretty high expectations.’

  Finn ducked his head, unaccustomed as he was to hearing his artistic efforts praised.

  ‘They’ve not turned out too bad, have they?’ he said, not meeting either of our eyes.

  ‘Not turned out too bad,’ Luke tutted as he clapped him on the back. ‘They’re a bloody triumph, man. Praise where praise is due, isn’t that right, Freya?’

  ‘Absolutely,’ I agreed, smiling tightly. ‘They look really great.’

  Finn and I stood next to each other in silence, not that we could have got a word in edgeways as Luke walked up and down, giving us a running commentary on his thoughts.

  ‘It’s weird,’ he said, ‘I know they’re not real, obviously, but you’ve managed to give them so much life, Finn, that I wouldn’t be at all surprised to find them turn their heads and stare right at me.’

  It was funny that he should say that because I had thought the very same thing when I first saw them in the studio. I bit my lip and looked at my feet. I wasn’t going to think about what had happened after I had been introduced to them.

  ‘Zak said that last night,’ Finn then shocked me by saying.

  ‘Zak,’ I frowned, my head snapping up again, ‘when did you see him?’

  ‘He called around late, just as I was finishing up and, as he was here, he offered to help me move them. It was perfect timing really because I wanted it to be a surprise.’

  ‘A surprise?’ I echoed.

  I don’t think I could have felt more surprised if the hares came to life and started leaping about the place.

  ‘Yes,’ Finn carried on. ‘As you and I had decided where they should go, I wanted to get them in place under cover of darkness so that it would just look like they’d hopped here themselves. I knew it was going to be a job to manoeuvre them, but had you and everyone else been here to help me do it, then some of their magic would have been lost.’

  I looked at him and took a deep breath. Not the petty-minded sod I had labelled him then.

  ‘I know that sounds ridiculous,’ he said, turning red and scuffing the edge of the path with his boot.

  ‘No,’ I swallowed, ‘it’s not that…’

  I stopped and shook my head. I had assumed that he had gone to all this trouble out of spite, but actually he had just wanted to surprise everyone.

  ‘What then?’ he frowned, his grey eyes darker than usual, his scrutiny impossible to shrug off.

  ‘Well,’ I said, ‘I was already surprised to find them here and now you’re telling us that Zak helped you move them, I’m even more amazed. It’s all a bit much, isn’t it, Luke?’

  I purposefully pulled him back into the conversation and thankfully it did the trick.

  ‘Yes,’ Luke gaped. ‘Zak, of all people. He would be the last person I would have expected to lend you a hand, Finn!’

  ‘I know,’ said Finn, sounding equally baffled.

  ‘So, how did that come about?’

  Finn shook his head. ‘He said he was heading home after the carnival,’ he explained, ‘and realised he’d left some tools here that he was going to need for a job today. Then he spotted the studio light was still on and thought he’d check that I was all right.’

  That sounded about as ‘un-Zak’ as you could possibly get, if you weren’t privy to the new and improved version that is.

  ‘He thought he’d check that you were all right?’ Luke frowned in response. ‘What, no mickey-taking or brotherly baiting?’

  ‘Nope,’ said Finn, shoving his hands deep in his pockets. ‘Nothing like that. When he saw me struggling to load the sculptures on to the platform truck, he offered to lend a hand.’

  ‘I was wondering how you’d got them out here,’ said Luke, again looking at the path.

  ‘I probably could have managed on my own,’ Finn carried on, ‘but having Zak’s brawn was a real boost and we had them set out in no time. He even helped rake the gravel once we’d finished, and did it quietly so we didn’t disturb anyone.’

  ‘Did Zak say if he liked them?’ I couldn’t resist asking, as I tried to coax Nell out from behind my legs, which was still her go-to spot whenever Finn was around.

  ‘He did actually,’ Finn said, scratching the back of his head. ‘Though he did keep calling them rabbits rather than hares, until I pointed out the differences.’

  ‘I bet he loved that,’ Luke laughed.

  ‘He took it all with good grace,’ Finn carried on. ‘He even hung about to help me with something else.’

  I bet that was fixing the dragons in the fern garden.

  ‘And the even weirder thing was,’ Finn finished up, still sounding amazed, ‘that when he left, he didn’t take any tools with him at all.’

  ‘So, what was all that about then?’ frowned Luke. ‘What was he really doing here?’

  ‘I don’
t know,’ Finn shrugged. ‘I just hope he wasn’t up to something. Snooping around with an ulterior motive.’

  I was annoyed that was where his mind had immediately sprung to. The purpose of Zak’s visit was obviously to check his brother was okay, having noticed his absence from the carnival.

  ‘I hardly think he would have purposefully sought you out if he was up to no good, would he?’ I pointed out. ‘If he was snooping, as you so kindly put it, then he wouldn’t have made an effort to alert you to his presence, would he?’

  ‘I suppose not,’ said Finn, looking a little embarrassed that I had called him out.

  ‘Perhaps you should give him the benefit of the doubt,’ I carried on, ‘and accept his help as the act of kindness that it was no doubt intended to be.’

  I stopped talking before I said too much.

  ‘If you knew Zak as well as we do, Freya,’ Luke said, ‘then you’d understand Finn’s scepticism.’

  ‘I see,’ I swallowed.

  ‘You aren’t falling for the charms of my burly builder by any chance, are you, Freya?’ he teasingly added.

  ‘No, of course I’m not,’ I shot back.

  Luke laughed at my hasty and vociferous denial, but Finn didn’t.

  ‘But he is handy with a spanner,’ I said, more equably, ‘so that does give him a certain appeal I suppose.’

  ‘He sorted your sink, didn’t he?’ said Luke, readily abandoning the subject of attraction for his preferred topic of faulty pipework.

  ‘He did,’ I agreed. ‘It’s all as good as new.’

  ‘I thought you said you could handle it yourself,’ Finn said gruffly.

  ‘I could,’ I snapped, ‘but my landlord called in the professionals before I had a chance to do it.’

  I was annoyed to find my tone matching his.

  ‘I don’t think it would be a bad idea to come and have a proper look around the house before the winter really sets in,’ Luke carried on, not picking up on the rising tension. ‘I know we had a survey done, and Harold’s never had any problems, but that burst pipe last year caused absolute chaos here, so it would give me some peace of mind. Would that be all right do you think, Freya?’