Moving Target

by Kimberly Van Meter

“So feisty...” he murmured, and let himself out.

  The guards led Kat and Jake from the lab and dumped them both in her tiny room. She allowed her surprise to show and the guard on the left gave her a subtle nod, so subtle she almost thought she imagined it. But what did it matter? Their lives were on the short track. Miles had no reason to keep them alive.

  She went to Jake and grasped his hand. He looked to her with a wide, almost blank stare and asked with difficulty, “Do...I...know...you?”

  She nodded and wiped her tears away. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “This is all my fault. I’m so sorry.”

  “Don’t...cry.”

  A tiny, almost hysterical bubble of laughter followed as she kissed his hand. Bossy even with a brain blowout. “I love you, Jake Isaacs. God, I love you.”

  Jake stared past Kat, bewildered, probably wondering why he couldn’t remember anything. She couldn’t imagine anything more startling than to discover that your memories were a blank slate. Kat started talking, maybe to ease the silence or maybe to avoid facing the horrible reality. “When my uncle first showed signs of Alzheimer’s, the signs were very small. Little things he’d forget, names and places, mostly, but then as things got worse, he started to forget where he lived and he would wander. It got so that he couldn’t be trusted to be alone. I had to hire a babysitter for him but then he wouldn’t listen to the babysitter, either. It was exhausting chasing after him. I felt guilty for putting him in that facility but relieved, too. But I told myself if I could manufacture a cure, then I could make it better for him.” Kat stopped as her throat closed. She inhaled a sharp breath and forced herself to continue. “I was so close. I pushed forward when I knew I should’ve stopped. But it was so tantalizing, the idea that I might create a cure for Alzheimer’s. My ego put us here. I’m no better than Miles Jogan,” she finished with an agonized whisper.

  Kat didn’t know the extent of the damage to Jake’s brain, nor what kind of damage would be permanent. She didn’t know what to think of his sluggish mental faculties but could only hope that part would fade eventually. But what did she know? Maybe it was irreversible. God, she hoped not. She wanted Jake to argue with her, call her stubborn or comment on her quirky personality. She wanted him to give her that special look that gave her shivers. Would she ever get her Jake back?

  Maybe it was all a moot point. Miles wouldn’t suffer them to live for too long. Kat slipped her hand into Jake’s and leaned against him, closing her eyes for a moment because she was literally exhausted.

  Kat had only closed her eyes for a moment when she heard gunshots. Startling, she wondered what was going on. A part of her leaped with hope at the idea that someone was storming this underground prison looking for them but the odds of that were very low. With any luck, Miles Jogan took a bullet to the balls in the skirmish.

  Suddenly, the door opened and Kat jumped back, terrified that she was about to meet her maker, but two men she didn’t recognize rushed in and one went straight to Jake while the other stood at the door with his gun ready.

  “No...no...Jakey?” The man grabbed Jake’s chin and stared hard into his eyes but there was zero recognition in them. “What happened to him?” he demanded, nearly yelling at Kat.

  “H-he’s been given MCX-209. His memory is gone,” she stammered an answer, looking at the man, who seemed a bigger, rawer version of Jake. “Who are you?”

  “I’m his brother. Come on, we’re getting the hell out of here. You must be Kat?” he guessed as he shouldered Jake. At her nod, he said, “We have to get him to the hospital. Follow me.”

  “How’d you get in?” she asked, hurrying after the man. “What’s your name?”

  “My name is Nathan and we got in with a little help from a virus and my friend, Holden. Michelle Rainier, Jake’s top superior, caught wind of Miles Jogan’s extracurricular activity and decided to check in herself. While we were able to access the facility, Rainier assembled her own team and found Jogan operating his little freak show. Tell me what we can do for Jake.”

  Holden paused to take a quick look at Jake and the only change in his expression was the minute twitch in his eyebrow as he said to Kat, “He looks brain dead. Your drug did this?”

  Kat nodded with misery. “I didn’t want to. Miles made me. Trust me, I wish I’d never created it.”

  Holden grunted with a nod then jerked his head at Nathan, as if to say, let’s blow this joint, and Kat was happy to obey.

  “It’s not your fault. No one blames you,” Nathan said quickly, adjusting his brother as they hurried down the hallway. “Is there anything we can do to help him?”

  “I don’t know,” she admitted, scared to death that Nathan would eventually hate her when he realized Jake may never be the same. “I made modifications to the formula in the hopes of making the drug’s effects temporary but I hadn’t had the chance to test the new formula before Miles made me inject Jake.”

  “That bastard is going to pay,” Nathan growled. “He’d better hope my brother recovers.”

  Kat nodded, anguish caught in her chest at the reality facing Jake’s recovery. Nathan didn’t blame her at the moment because they had bigger problems and that’s probably what Nathan was focusing on but eventually, when Jake’s recovery slowed to a crawl—if he recovered at all—Nathan might change his tune. She swallowed the fear and forced herself to focus on the here and now. A miracle would be greatly appreciated, she thought with a quick prayer.

  They passed Miles as a very stern-looking woman was handcuffing him. Kat knew she ought to keep going but there was no way she was going to pass up the opportunity to give Miles what he deserved, if even in the smallest measure. Before Nathan could stop her, she walked right up to Miles and slapped him as hard as she could right across the mouth. The impact stung her hand but it felt good. “I hope they stick you someplace dark and dank and you never see the sunlight ever again,” she spat. “A prison cell is too good for you.”

  The woman paused, lifting a penciled brow at Kat’s sudden act of violence. “And you are?” she asked, her gaze flicking to Nathan, Jake and Holden, but her attention seemed focused on Kat.

  “I’m Dr. Kat Odgers. I created MCX-209.”

  “If you were smart you’d keep this woman under lock and key,” Miles said, glaring at Kat, still attempting to exert some authority even though he had none. “She’s got the power to create the world’s biggest weapon. If not me, then someone else is going to find her and finish what I started.”

  The woman ignored Miles but Kat could feel the tension growing between Nathan and Holden, who clearly wanted to do some damage to Miles, as well.

  For a long moment, the woman regarded Kat with interest but then her gaze flicked to Miles and she said, “We’ll be in touch. The guards tell me your uncle is also in this facility?” she asked, and Kat nodded. “We’ll return him to his managed care facility.” To Nathan she said, “Take him home. A hospital can do nothing for him. Isn’t that right, Dr. Odgers?”

  She nodded, a little in awe of this powerful woman that Kat had to assume was Michelle Rainier.

  “Take him home so he can rest. If he’s going to recover, it will happen surrounded by things he knows.”

  Kat wasn’t sure about that but it was a worth a try. Honestly, she’d happily go anywhere as long as it was away from this underground hell. “Thank you,” she said with tears in her eyes.

  “Don’t thank me yet. We still have to work out what’s going to happen with that drug of yours. I think you know we can’t let that out into the world...in anyone’s hands.”

  Kat knew that all too well. She’d do whatever she needed to make things right.

  Chapter 24

  Jake knew that a terrible drug had affected his memory. He knew that the man who gave him anxious looks was his brother and he knew he used to work for a U.S. government department call
ed the Defense Intelligence, but he only knew these things because that’s what he’d been told. He had no recollection of these facts and it freaked him out.

  On a certain level, it felt as if people were making up his personal history because there was absolutely no connection on his part to any of the things he’d been told. The guy identified as his brother, Nathan, looked ready to beat someone to a pulp over what’d been done to him. According to the woman who’d been forced to give him the drug, Kat, the drug was supposed to wear off but it’d been a few days with only subtle improvements and he’d given up hope that anything would change.

  “How are you feeling today?” Kat asked, coming into the room where Jake was staring out the front window, watching people and cars go by on the residential street. Jake turned and shrugged. “About the same?”

  “Yeah,” he answered. He knew she felt personally responsible for what had happened to him but from the events that had been told to him, it wasn’t her fault. She was as much a victim as anyone else.

  “I think I must’ve miscalculated something—again. The effects should’ve worn off by now,” she said, worrying her lip and appearing ready to burst into tears.

  He may not remember her but when he looked at her, something like sunshine on a warm day spread throughout his chest. He didn’t know why but he liked it.

  “I’m so sorry, Jake. I don’t know what to do to fix this.”

  “Maybe with more time,” he suggested, though he didn’t hold out hope. Her soft brown hair was pulled back from her face and he caught a good look at her eyes—a striking green that shone like polished jade—and he wondered if she knew how beautiful she was. He wished he could remember more about their history. Thus far, Kat had been unwilling to talk much about it, saying she didn’t want to unduly influence his memory. But the way he saw it, maybe talking about it was the key. “Was I in love with you?” he asked, startling her with his soft query. “Because when I look at you, I feel something different than when I look at the rest of the people around me.”

  “I—I don’t know...maybe...I mean, yes, I think you were,” she admitted, tears starting to collect in her eyes. “But we’d only known each other a short time so maybe it was just the extreme situation we were in.”

  “Maybe,” he said, but as soon as she suggested it, his chest tightened and he knew that wasn’t the case. He’d felt something real with this woman and he wanted it back. An idea struck him. He’d been watching copious amounts of television to catch up on current events and in the midst of zoning out on CNN, a commercial for improving memory had flashed across the screen. He wondered if something like that might help him. “You say my brain isn’t exactly physically damaged...maybe we can retrain my brain to remember things?”

  “Like how?”

  “I don’t know. Brain games? I saw this commercial on CNN, after watching an entire segment about the current struggle in Afghanistan,” he said.

  Kat considered his suggestion, frowning slightly as she processed—a little habit he noticed she did often and he found really cute. “Maybe...we could try it,” she said. “Let me do some research and I’ll get back to you about it.”

  He nodded, then reached up to gently pull her hair free from its elastic. “There...that’s better.” He slid his fingers through the strands. “Your hair is so soft.” He leaned forward and inhaled deeply, surprised by the jolt he felt when the familiar scent hit his olfactory senses. Something about that scent... “I remember something,” he said with growing excitement. “Something about you...”

  “Of course!” Kat exclaimed as if she should’ve known. “The olfactory sense is the closest shortcut to memory the brain has! Come, smell my neck. You used to nuzzle my neck—it was your favorite spot, you said.”

  Jake didn’t hesitate and pulled her into his arms. This felt right. He buried his nose against the soft flesh of her neck and inhaled deeply. The scent of warm female skin tingled in his nostril and he closed his eyes as a flash of something raced across his mind. He tightened his hold on Kat, and she released a tiny moan as if she couldn’t help herself. He pressed an exploratory kiss on the pliant skin, his lips nibbling as he went, and while it felt like heaven to hold her like this, nothing more than that momentary sizzle erupted in his memory. He sighed, knowing it had been too much to hope for.

  She stilled in his arms and she knew that they’d been denied their miracle. She tried to pull away but he didn’t want to let her go. “I don’t remember you,” he admitted. “But I remember the way I feel when I’m around you. There’s something inside my heart that remembers you even if my brain doesn’t.”

  She nodded but when he finally let her go, tears sparkled in her eyes. “I don’t think I can live with what I’ve done, not only to you but to the others,” she said in a tortured voice. “There were so many others in that place who suffered far more than you—who died horrible deaths—because of this drug. I see their faces when I sleep at night and I don’t know how much more I can handle.”

  “It wasn’t your fault.”

  “It doesn’t matter. I still carry the guilt. I should’ve been strong enough to kill myself before Miles could make me give those innocent people that injection but I was too much of a coward.”

  “Stop that. Don’t talk about dying,” he said roughly. Just the thought of Kat not being around filled him with panic. “We’ll get this figured out.”

  She cupped his face, her expression sad. “Jake...the drug should’ve worn off by now. These effects might be permanent. I don’t think I can bear the thought that I did this to you. It’s killing me inside.”

  “So we make new memories,” he said stubbornly. “You’re the only one who makes me feel anything. That has to mean something. I think if we give it more time, the drug will wear off because even though I don’t have my memory back I have improved. I could barely speak a few days ago,” he reminded her. She nodded but the sadness radiating from her nearly broke his heart. This time, he cupped her face. “Please don’t give up on me.”

  “I could never give up on you but, for the safety of the world, the knowledge of MCX-209 needs to go away. I think I should take the injection, too.”

  “No!” he said emphatically. “Don’t even think about doing something so reckless. I won’t let you.”

  “Jake, there’s still the threat hanging over our heads. Someone is going to find out that I made that damn drug and I’ll always have to look over my shoulder. I don’t want to live that way. Your boss Michelle Rainier has arranged for me to have a new identity but if someone really wants to find out who I am, they’ll do it and this nightmare will start all over again. I never want to put my loved ones at risk again.”

  “I understand and maybe it’s selfish of me to beg you not to do it, but I feel as if everything that made me, me, the essence of who I truly am, is housed safely in your head. If that goes away...I truly won’t have existed at all. And there’s something else...I don’t want you to stop looking at me the way you do,” he admitted, drawing her close to sweep a kiss across her lips. She sagged against him as a sob fell from her lips. He kissed her harder, needing to feel her against him, and as she responded, clinging to him as tightly as he clung to her, something inside his brain shifted and another dizzying volley of emotion nearly tumbled him to the ground. “You’re the key to my recovery,” he whispered against her mouth. “Please stick with me. We’re so close. Promise you won’t give up on me.”

  “I promise,” she choked out the words. “I promise.”

  Jake held her as she cried and a few tears of his own leaked from his eyes but he knew he could come back from this if Kat helped him. It was his gut instinct that told him to not let her go and while he didn’t remember his previous life with the DID, somehow he sensed that that gut instinct had kept him alive on many occasions, so he was going to pay sharp attention to whatever little signals came his way
.

  Later that night as he stared up at the night sky, Nathan joined him. They sat in silence for a long moment until his brother started talking, as if to fill the void between them.

  “I haven’t told you everything about our relationship,” Nathan started, his voice heavy with something painful. “Before you got injected with that drug, you were harboring some serious anger against me and it was warranted.”

  Jake didn’t know what to think of that. He didn’t know this man, and thus felt no animosity toward him. “Don’t feel compelled to confess your sins or apologize for crimes I don’t remember,” he said. “I don’t know what beef I had with you but you seem a pretty decent guy now, so let’s just let it go at that.”

  “I wish I could. But I have to get something off my chest. Once I’ve said my piece, you can do with it what you want. Okay?”

  “I guess. If you feel you have to.”

  Nathan nodded and pushed forward with an air of determination as if he needed courage to continue. “Our childhood was shit. Our parents were no-good abusive losers who didn’t deserve a fish much less three kids.”

  “Three?”

  “We had a sister, Bunny. She died when she was six.”

  Somehow the pain of not remembering a sister who had died hurt more than anything. “What was she like?” he asked.

  Nathan paused to pull the memory free. Jake imagined it was as painful for Nathan to remember as it was for him to realize he’d forgotten. “She was always smiling, no matter what—even when she was doing something she shouldn’t. She had an impish spirit and loved to play hide-and-seek.”

  “What happened to her?”

  “Our mother backed over her with the station wagon we owned. I was supposed to be watching her, but I was arguing with you about something stupid and took my eyes off her for a minute. The next thing I knew, everyone was screaming and Bunny was dead.”

  Jake stared at his brother, unable to fathom the guilt he must carry. It was too much for one person to carry alone. “You were a kid, hardly old enough to be watching over two siblings without supervision,” Jake said, trying to ease the pain he saw in Nathan’s eyes. “You have to let that go.”