Finn's Fortune

by Kathleen Ball

  Grinning, he shook his head. He hoped they had enough sense to hole up for the winter. They’d be long dead before spring if they didn’t. He shrugged. That was not his problem. He took a deep breath. They were free. Finn quickly re-buried the box in case he needed it again.

  He gloried in the sun, the wind, the trees swaying and the green grass. He hoped there weren’t any other secrets. He liked this feeling of the weight of the world off his shoulders. It was a first since he had come to America.

  Maureen got up and dressed herself. She couldn’t concentrate, so she paced. What was Finn thinking by tricking those men? She’d always thought him a smart man, but now she wasn’t sure. He’d better come back to her. They hadn’t even had a chance to have a normal life together. Her imagination wouldn’t slow. She kept picturing all sorts of horrible things happening to him.

  At least she knew where the secret escape door was. The man was crafty, though he could be a bit of a puzzle at times. They wouldn’t have to worry about Indian attacks. They could run through the tunnel. The more she thought about it the more she realized he must have been an important man for the cause of Ireland. Why else put a price on his head?

  It was rarely done. He was a hero, trying to break the bonds shackling the people by the British. In many ways, it was just like the way he helped to free her. Would they ever see a free Ireland in their lifetime? She’d never understood how those in power could just let people be burned out of their houses and left to starve. Who was going to do all the work for all the Lords of the Manors? But it was as though they didn’t care how many died. The fact that both she and Finn knew how to read and write was a novelty. It was forbidden to them, as was speaking their Gaelic language. Their religion had been taken from them. They were no longer allowed to be Catholics but were made to attend protestant churches. They couldn’t own land, or a horse worth more than five pounds. What was never counted on was the stubbornness and conviction of the strong people of Ireland. Yet, even though they’d become a nation of paupers, they’d found a way. They kept many of their traditions alive and they’d handed down their stories.

  It was hard to watch every able-bodied person work so hard and earn so little. She swore people aged too early and died too young. But when she’d gotten off the ship, she realized to her dismay that she’d traded one type of bondage for another. Now to find out it had all been illegal, she wanted to be sick. She was so stupid to believe the captain who’d sold her. She could have found work and sent money home.

  Why did others take advantage when they could? Was there really so much evil in the world? And what had become of her family? Were any of them still alive?

  She and Finn would have strong children who knew what it meant to be free. They already owned land. She’d tell them the stories of hardship and bondage of the Irish people. She’d teach them to speak Gaelic. They’d practice their own Catholic religion. God willing they would all thrive and she’d be sure they were educated.

  She took her shoes and stockings off and walked outside. The ground was cold, but she dug her toes into the earth. She owned this land. Imagine a woman owning anything. God had been looking out for her. It was strange, but she felt connected to the land.

  She spied Finn riding in and waved.

  He swung down and stared at her feet with his brow furrowed.

  “Finn Langley, we are land owners. We are free and we own land. It’s an amazing thing.” She smiled.

  “I felt the same way when I went into the land office. I was waiting for them to say you’re Irish, you can’t have land, but this is America. My whole being filled with pride when I signed the paper. I didn’t have to sign by making an X! I signed my name.”

  She laughed when Finn swung her up into his arms.

  “You, my dear, are supposed to be inside.” He held her close as he stepped across the threshold.

  “I’m tired of resting.”

  He set her down in the rocking chair he’d made for her and filled a basin with warm water. Then he took a cloth and knelt in front of her. He wet the cloth and washed her feet for her. Such a simple act but it made her love him all the more.

  “You’ve taken such good care of me, Finn, and I thank you.”

  “Who was going to do all the cooking and cleaning if something happened to you?” He laughed. “It’s been a pleasure. I know you’d do the same for me.”

  “Yes I would.” Happiness flooded her being, and she prayed it never left. “It’s been nonstop action since you parked your wagon across from mine.”

  Finn’s laugh started as a low rumble in his chest and then he burst into hearty guffaws that went on for a good length of time. “I spent the first of it trying to catch a glimpse of your husband. One thing I can say is that you are never boring, Maureen.”

  She chuckled softly. “I had to steal clothes that fit a very big man to put on the clothes line. I wanted you to be wary of him.”

  “You did go to great lengths.”

  She grew silent for a moment. “You know what it’s like to run for your freedom. I was willing to try anything to keep from going back. But my antics led me to you, so it worked out well.”

  His eyes filled with love and her whole body shivered. “It did work out well. I thought myself a fool for not changing my name, but my name is all I came into the world with. The Langley’s stood for honesty, integrity, and being loyal to Ireland. I believe in Beare and Forebeare as my ancestors did. I wasn’t about to allow the English to take that from me too. There will be some lads following next year to expand the American Fenian Brotherhood.”

  “That won’t be dangerous will it?”

  Finn smiled. “Someday I’ll tell you stories that will curl your hair.”

  “Finn, what did you do in Ireland?”

  “I was a recruiter and a gun runner.” He drew a breath. “And I was part of a small group that set charges and blew up strategic targets.” One shoulder lifted in a haphazard shrug. “Like I said, I have stories that will take your breath away. I was a captain and I knew sooner or later they’d hang me or put me against the bloody wall where so many of my mates were executed so I escaped and came to America. I’ll never stop trying to contribute in any way I can. The cause was my whole life.”

  “You miss it.”

  “Aye, I do, but fate has led me to a different life with you. You’ve become more to me than I ever thought a woman could. I was always willing to die, but now I have the greatest reason to stay alive, you.”

  He carried her to bed and kissed her lips, then her neck, and her shoulder… He began to pull away but she took hold of his hand.

  “When will you make me a wife, Finn?”

  “As soon as you’re healed, a ghrá. It’ll be soon. Right now, I have to be sure all the chores are done. Once I’m in your bed you, won’t want me to leave.” He gave her one of his sexy grins.

  “Full of yourself aren’t you?” she teased, but butterflies stirred in her stomach and her heart thumped erratically.

  He stood and winked. “You wait and see. I have more wood to chop.”

  She shook her head as he closed the door behind him. Conceited was what he was. She lay back on her pillow, and suddenly she was filled with a wanting so strong she’d never known anything like it. Someday had better be soon.

  Chapter Ten

  Was she ready or not? The question swirled in his head all day. He’d spent the last week being very productive. He’d hunted, built the rest of the barn, and chopped a ton of wood. He was certain they had enough food for the winter.

  Maureen, God love her, kept giving him sultry looks, and she probably had no idea what she was doing. Now that the time had come, he was as nervous as a schoolboy. She wanted him; it showed in each kiss she gave him. Did she know it would hurt the first time? Probably not. It wouldn’t be something her mother would have talked about.

  The first snowflakes began floating from the sky, and he smiled. He went into the house and told Maureen to get her wrap. When he
led her outside, she smiled.

  “I’ve never seen snowflakes so big before. If this keeps up we’ll be buried in snow.”

  “I think we’ll find plenty to do if that happens.” His voice was husky.

  Her face turned crimson and not from the cold. “Perhaps.”

  “How’s your back healing?”

  She gazed at him and shook her head. “Seeing as you tend to it each evening, you’d know better than I.”

  “Has anyone ever talked to you about the first time you’re with a man?” His voice was so gentle and caring.

  Her eyes widened and she shook her head.

  Finn took her hand. “It hurts the first time. You’re maidenhood needs to be breached. But only the first time. After that it should be pleasant.”

  “Are you saying you want to… now?”

  “We can wait if you want. We’ve waited this long.”

  She put her arms around his waist and held him tight. “I’ve been waiting for this day, but I confess I’m nervous. What if I do something wrong? What if I’m not what you expected?”

  He put his arms around her and rocked them both back and forth. “There is no wrong way. Don’t worry.” He took a step back and looked into her eyes. “Are you ready for this?”

  She nodded. “Could you wait out here for a few minutes while I get ready?”

  He smiled at her sudden shyness. “Of course I can honey. Take your time.”

  He paced while he bided his time. It would be fine, he kept telling himself. After an interminable wait, he went inside. Maureen was already in bed and her beautiful red hair fanned her pillow. He swallowed hard at the sight of her.

  For a few moments, he stood in front of the roaring fire, warming his hands. Then he approached the bed. He began to get undressed, expecting her to turn away, but she didn’t. What if she didn’t like the way he looked? He should have insisted they wait until dark.

  As quick as he could, he slipped under the covers. They lay side by side, staring at the ceiling. Finn laughed. “Let’s look at each other instead.”

  They turned toward each other, and the love he saw reflected in her eyes erased all doubts. He reached for her and kissed her like there was no tomorrow. She kissed him back the same way. A shiver raced through her.

  “Are you cold?”

  She shook her head. “No, I guess my body is reacting to yours.”

  That was all the encouragement he needed. He stroked her and kissed her until she was ready. She cried out in pain for a second, and he paused, but then she released a sigh and smiled, and he began to love her again, not stopping until both their bodies shook with pleasure.

  He rolled onto his back and pulled her with him so her head was on his chest. “Are you all right?”

  She nodded.

  Why didn’t she say something?

  “Maureen, did I hurt you?”

  “It only hurt for a minute. The rest brought me a joy I never imagined before. I always thought it was a woman’s duty. I never heard anyone mention joy. Joy doesn’t even capture the feeling. It is much more than that.” She snuggled against him and yawned. “Tell me again why we waited so long?”

  Finn began to laugh, but before he could answer, Maureen had fallen asleep. He tucked her hair behind her ear and basked in his happiness. It was nice to have confirmation of what he’d thought all along: they’d be good together. Well, maybe not all along.

  Maureen snuggled closer to Finn, and her eyes quickly opened. They were both naked. She’d never slept without her nightgown on. Her hand was on his chest and the springy hair on it intrigued her. He was well muscled. She touched his shoulders and his hard stomach. Finn coughed, and she abruptly stopped.

  “I didn’t mean to wake you. There’s at least an hour before we get up.”

  He pulled her close and whispered in her ear, “I know something we can do for an hour.”

  “But it’s morning!”

  “There aren’t any hard and fast rules about when we make love. Come here.”

  She eagerly kissed him.

  Afterward, she put her dress on while she was still under the sheets. She stood and Finn’s lips twitched as though he was trying not to laugh. “What’s so funny?”

  “Your modesty, I suppose. Actually, I don’t know what I was laughing about. Modesty is a good thing.”

  She went to the cook stove, and when she heard Finn behind her, she put her hands on her hips. “I think you’d better go and bring in some more wood.” Then she ignored him and started breakfast.

  “Yes, you’re sassy all right. I like sassy.” The door closed behind him.

  Maureen laughed. It was a bit awkward, but they’d be spending their lives together so they’d best get used to it.

  She cooked the bacon and made pancakes. She was just pouring the coffee when he walked in with an armful wood.

  Finn stacked the wood near the stove and then stood behind Maureen, wrapping his arms around her. She giggled when he kissed her behind her neck.

  “You’ve made me a happy man.”

  She turned her head to try to look at him. “Really? I mean it made me happy but I wasn’t sure about…”

  He tightened his hold on her. “You were perfect.”

  At a loss for words, she motioned toward the table. “Breakfast.”

  He let go of her and sat down. “Looks good.”

  “Finn, when do you think we’ll have a tiny bit of extra money?” She pushed her food around her plate.

  He shrugged. “We have enough you don’t need to worry about us.”

  “Well, what I mean is do you think we’ll have enough to send back home after next year? I know you plan to harvest hay, and I was just wondering.” She couldn’t look at him. He was working so hard all the time, she shouldn’t have asked.

  “I’ve sent out a few letters to my contacts in County Mayo in the hope that they knew where your family had settled. As soon as we find them, we can send some money.”

  Maureen tilted her head and studied him. “Thank you for trying to find them. I don’t want to send it unless we can spare it.”

  Finn put his fork down and reached across the table, covering her hand with his. “I was well cared for. My friends got me on a ship and gave me enough funds to start a new life. I’ve been pretty frugal. It’ll be fine. Plus we still have some of the money I found in your wagon.”

  She nodded and smiled. “I really thought I’d be able to send money to my family sooner. But last I heard they’ve avoided the workhouses.”

  Finn got up and added more wood to the fire. “That’s for the best. Once you go in, you don’t come out no matter how young you are when you go in. They work you until there’s nothing left of you. Most people know to avoid them. I’ll go check on the horses and your mule.”

  How incredible it was to feel completely at ease with Finn. Her nerves had been working overtime in anticipation of their wedding night. There had been so many stories and opinions told, while she was in steerage coming over to America, she wasn’t sure what was true. The younger women told her it was just fine while the older ones bemoaned about the duty they had to do each night. Frankly, it had scared her.

  It was a fine thing not to have to worry about such things anymore. They had a wonderful time together. The door opened and she could see the snow coming down heavily. Finn stomped inside, his face red with cold.

  “I suppose this is just the beginning of the bad weather,” she said. “Come sit by—”

  “Your horse is gone,” he blurted. “I’m going to take Justice and see if I can find Vala. Let’s hope that horse is smarter than she looks.”

  “I know you’re annoyed, but she’s a smart horse.”

  Finn got his bedroll together. “You’re right. I’d rather snuggle with my wife than chase a horse in the falling snow. I tied a rope from the house to the barn in case I’m not back. I left Contrary plenty of food, but you never know. If for any reason you do need to go out to the barn, be sure to hold on tight to
the rope. People have died not ten feet away from their homes because the snow and wind made it impossible to see. Keep a lantern burning in the window for me too.”

  She helped Finn gather supplies and then she hugged him close, wishing she didn’t have to let him go. “Don’t get lost out there. She’ll probably come back on her own.”

  He gave her a long lingering kiss before he walked out the door. The wind was wickedly fierce, and the cabin was instantly chilled. Maureen added more wood to the fire and began to worry. She tried to keep busy sewing herself a warmer dress, but she kept opening the door to check for Finn. Soon she began to pace, and when he missed the noon meal, her stomach began to feel as though it was tied in knots.

  After taking a few deep breaths, she went back to sewing her wool dress. It was a pretty shade of blue that Finn said matched her eyes. It didn’t take long before she pricked her finger with the needle. She set it aside again. It wouldn’t do to get blood on the fabric.

  Darkness was beginning to descend, and she lit the oil lamp. The problem was, where to put it. They didn’t have glass for their windows. They just had shutters. She pushed the table to the window and set the lamp on it. Then she opened the shutters just enough to let the light out. Did they have enough oil left? They’d been using candles since they were cheaper. After wrapping two blankets around her shoulders, she sat in her rocking chair by the wood burning stove.

  Where was he? Was he safe? Then she heard a wolf howl and the answering howls of other wolves answering. Closing her eyes, she prayed for Finn’s safety. It was all in God’s hands now.

  The shutter opened inward a bit.

  “Dang wind.” She rose to secure the shutter and was met by the glowing eyes of a wolf. Her scream echoed off the cabin walls, but it remained undeterred. In fact it looked about to jump into the cabin. Gritting her teeth, she raced over to slam and lock the shutter. The wolf scratched at the shutters with its long claws. The sound sent shivers down her spine.