Affinity

by Dianne Wilson

  The map at his feet was no longer a flat object, but rectangular–even bookish. An image on the wall caught his attention. A black and white shot in soft focus. Kai couldn’t figure out what it was from so far away. He left the map/book thing on the floor, drawn in for a closer look. It was a woman, heavily pregnant, lying in a field of wildflowers. The top half of her face was covered by a sunhat, but what stuck out below was a smile so radiant, he didn’t want to look away. Her curly dark hair fanned out below her. The white shirt she wore was tucked up enough that her belly stuck out. One hand held her hat, the other cradled her swollen middle and the life snuggled safely inside. There was an undeniable tenderness in the curve of her fingers. Written on her skin were words that he could barely read.

  Love lives here.

  Joy jolted through him. He moved to the next one.

  A baby bath, soap bubbles in the water as if the baby had just been lifted out.

  Then the same bath, but dry and unused. Shelves of baby clothes, folded and not filled with a baby. He moved on.

  A school bag—empty.

  Racing car bed, perfectly made as if no-one had ever slept in it.

  Wait…he’d seen that car before…he’d tucked Runt into that same bed. These photos were taken in TrisTessa’s house. He returned to the first one. Now that he suspected, it was easy to see the curve of her jaw, her smile. But this was not a photo of a woman who was unhappy to be having a baby. She looked delighted. If it were such a bad memory, why would she even put it on display?

  Then again, artists of any sort tended to martyrdom to some extent. She had these up to sell them, it was all about profit. A single smile didn’t prove anything.

  ~*~

  Evazee drifted. Afloat in never-ending dark. She was abandoned by the One she’d trusted; she had abandoned those who’d trusted her. It would only be a matter of time until she let go and sank below the surface.

  The door to her room swung open with a swoosh. The sound woke her, but she couldn’t bring herself to do anything about it. Apathy strapped her to the bed far more effectively than any restraints would have.

  “Get up. You’re starting Phase 2.”

  She opened her eyes.

  Torn leaned over—his face so close that he blocked out the rest of the room and his breath filled her lungs.

  Eva sat up, faked a yawn and slid away from him, curling up against the headboard. Her body felt sluggish and heavy, as though sludge flowed through her veins.

  “Don’t.”

  It would take a complete half-wit to ignore the thick warning in that one word. Eva rolled off the bed and onto her feet.

  Torn shoved her out the door and marched her through the maze of the OS with his fingers poking into her back. They climbed the ladder to the roof, following the same route that Elden had led her.

  The roof was a flat expanse that stretched as far as she could see. Long poles stuck up at each corner of the building, each one unique to the other three, seemingly made from wood and metal. Wires extended from them like primitive torture devices.

  By the time they’d reached a marked spot in the middle of the square space, the sun had all but dropped out of sight, the last few rays casting long shadows like misshapen dwarves across the roof top. The half-light was gentle on her eyes, unlike the previous time she’d been up here that had left her blind and blinking.

  He pushed her to her knees, pulled a syringe from his pocket and plunged the needle deep into her arm, sending a burn through her that stole the air from her lungs. She would have toppled sideways, but Torn caught her, throwing her weight forward.

  Eva doubled over, fighting the waves of pain.

  The shift to darkness was swift and complete. One moment there was twilight, the next deep night. Eva blinked and swallowed the urge to throw up. The burning pain left as quickly as it had hit, leaving her legs weak. She used her hands to push herself to a stand, hoping her wobbly legs would hold her up.

  Torn had vanished, though the blackness was so thick it could be just an illusion.

  So this was the blackness Kai had spoken of. Darkness so thick one could swallow it—thick enough to smother her light. Or maybe she’d done that all by herself. Someone moved behind her, took her by the elbow, and whispered, “I have a little surprise for you.” She glanced back. Torn had been behind her all along. Coppery snakes writhed on his forehead and Eva’s skin crawled. “We call these our green tubes. Very useful for training.”

  A button clicked and the floor at her feet shifted, sections of it retracting like camera shutters to reveal circular glass panels, lit green from the room below.

  Morgan sat on the other side of the glass panel. She sat alone on the floor in a circular room no bigger than the glass panel at Eva’s feet. Morgan’s knees were drawn up and her chin rested on them. Her eyes flicked back and forth over the wall of the glass tube. Whatever she was seeing must have been horrible as she covered her mouth with her hand. Twin tracks of tears ran down her cheeks, and she used the back of her hand to wipe them.

  Eva leaned forward and rested her hand on the glass. Through the glass, she felt the sound of her friend crying. A fat LightSucker flew laps around Morgan, and Eva hoped it wouldn’t bite. But then Morgan hunched over. It was too late. A black circle marred the skin on Morgan’s back—a LightSucker bite. Worse than the bug and the black wound, a darKound waited outside her tube. It circled the glass structure, relentlessly pacing, eyes fixed on Morgan. Eva bit her fingers to stop herself crying out.

  “The bite was thanks to you. She was pretty much bullet proof until your paths crossed.”

  Dark spots danced around the edges of Eva’s vision. She was going to black out.

  “Don’t be sad. We all have to grow up. You helped them. You should be proud.”

  ~*~

  It was a small sign, unremarkable in every way, sitting on the wall outside the gallery: What Wasn’t.

  All the pieces in this section of the gallery are for viewing only, not for sale.

  It changed everything.

  Kai read it three times.

  And stepped from thrown away into loved.

  A tectonic shift in his thinking, subtle and small. As if he needed to re-look at every situation, every word, every action that had glued together all the pieces of his life until now. Another walk through the gallery, each photo framed now in a mother’s fierce love.

  Not just good angles and perfect lighting, but a broken heart trying to make sense of a loss that defied any reason, pain that refused to be comforted.

  As he walked the hall, trailing his fingers across each canvas, he allowed the emotions to roll over him, settling like snowflakes, realigning his mind, his spirit. By the time he was through, layers of belonging settled into his DNA.

  He was looking at the same pictures—nothing had changed in the gallery—other than his perception. And that changed everything.

  Not abandoned. Loved.

  ~*~

  Evazee huddled inside a dark green tube. Torn had brought her down off the roof and locked her inside an empty one. Green tubes all around her were lit up, but the light stayed off in hers. The floor of the tube was wide enough that she could sit cross-legged comfortably, without her knees touching the curved glass walls. Once the door was shut, it sealed off seamlessly, almost disappearing. She could see her friends through the glass, each locked inside a tube of their own. Beyond them stretched row upon row of glowing green tubes so that they filled the top floor of the OS. Most of the tubes were lit and occupied. Those that stood empty remained dark like hers.

  Eva didn’t recognise the girl in the tube next to her. She sat hugging her knees, face lifted, wet with tears. It bothered Eva to see her so upset. She tapped on the glass and waved, but the girl didn’t notice. She was lost in her own private torture. As far as Evazee could see, no one looked out beyond their glass prisons or tried to communicate with each other. Without fail, they sat or stood in varying degrees of distress.

  Weird.


  A whirring started up and the lights came on. A strange sensation came over Eva. She cradled her head in her hands, willing it to stop, and in a few seconds it did. The inside of her tube shifted to solid opaque and she saw herself as a little girl, tongue out in concentration, writing a letter to her Dad. She breathed in. Chocolate cake in the oven, the sweet icing her mom was mixing to go on top once it was baked. The scent of clean clothes was blowing on the line just outside the open back door. Mom was humming, an old ditty about true love and toothpaste kisses.

  With the last full stop, she finished her letter, folded it carefully and kissed the outside the way she’d seen Mommy do. The polished stone floor of the passage was cold under her feet, but the bedroom carpet warmed them again as she pushed open the door to Mom and Dad’s bedroom. Dad was home, sick in bed, and Eva’s heart was full at having them both home together. She was used to being home with Mom, but to have Dad home too…what a rare treat.

  He was dozing, but she couldn’t wait. She tugged his arm until his eyes opened, pushed her letter into his weak fingers. Her words would make him stronger, she just knew it. But as he unfolded the creases, his face buckled in pain and her world imploded. Like a maelstrom of horror, Mom ran in and out. People. Busy people with cross voices, rushing and pushing. Shoving Eva away from him. Her letter fell unread from his lifeless fingers. She watched it fall in slow motion. It bounced as it hit the soft carpet. In a moment of dreadful clarity she knew. She should never have woken him up.

  He hadn’t read her words and now he never would.

  He was gone.

  And it was all her fault.

  29

  Kai couldn’t make sense of it. His brain spun like a blowing tumbleweed when he tried, but the shift inside him had changed his understanding. It was time to go back. He was ready to take on the OS and free all those trapped in the system. How was it possible that knowing he was loved could change everything he’d believed to be true? And yet it seemed to have done just that.

  He wanted to find TrissTessa and hear her story from her own lips. His story. But now was not the time. The itch in his hands spread up his forearms and burned all the way to his elbows. In the moonlight, his hands glowed faint green, enough to make him feel queasy. Convincing himself it was the light, Kai packed up his things and threw the bag onto his back. He lifted Zee’s necklace and put it on his neck and tucked it under his shirt for safe-keeping. The moment the feather touched his skin, the world swirled, and with a jarring thump he was back in the cave.

  Running through a muddy digger tunnel seemed far preferable to swimming through the tomb of a storm water drain. It would be quicker too.

  Mind made up, he left the necklace on and ran to the cave entrance. He would cut through the forest, find the tunnel entrance and work his way back into the OS through the storage room. Simple enough.

  The stench hit him as he stepped outside—rotting flesh mixed with old lavender. He swallowed hard, covered his mouth, and pinched his nose between his thumb and forefinger. His eyes watered. The forest was blocked off by towering green stems, curled and twisted, throbbing a green glow as they grew. And they grew faster than anything he’d ever seen—stems curling and twisting around the branches of the trees, clawing along, sealing him off from where he needed to go. His itchy arms ached. He held them up, glowing and pulsing in time with the monster plant blocking his way, and it hit him. He’d done this to himself. He’d replanted what should have stayed uprooted, and now his friends would suffer for his mistake.

  “So I have you to thank for this.” Shasta stepped out from behind one of the trunks, waving his hands toward the growing barricade. His pale eyes glowed in the gloom. “You did a good job.” An army of soulless slipped out from behind the hedge, their eyes trained on Kai, black midnight pools in pale faces.

  “Now wait…” Kai straightened, assuming a fighter’s stance—legs wide, fists clenched at his sides. He kept his eyes on Shasta, but by a quick count out of the corner of his eye, he guessed he was facing at least twenty soulless.

  “Don’t pretend you didn’t do this. I can see by your arms.”

  Kai tucked the offending limbs behind him, shrinking inside with every word.

  “Oh, I know. You couldn’t help yourself. It’s a weakness, you know. This desire to fix broken things. It will only get you into all sorts of trouble.” The sneer didn’t sit well on his beautiful face.

  Kai found himself wanting to do something right. Anything to smooth the harsh lines of displeasure from the man’s face. The fight went out of him and his head dropped. The green itch was spreading beyond his elbows now, darkening his skin as it travelled.

  “What’s up with your arms?” He gazed at Kai. “Looks um…uncomfortable.”

  “What’s it to you?”

  “I know you don’t think much of me. I can read your thoughts in your eyes, you know. I don’t miss a thing.” He left the trees, narrowing the distance between them with slow steps. “I worry about you, Kai.” His arms stretched out at his sides, palms forward. Snakes writhed in his flesh.

  Kai stared, hypnotised by the movement.

  A sticky inertia oozed through him as the man drew closer. Lead flowed through veins and it became easy to let go of the urge to run. Better to watch the snakes’ hypnotic dance. A low buzz started up from beyond the growing hedge. It registered on the edges of Kai’s awareness, triggering a rush of adrenalin. Thinking was like swimming through thick jelly. So much effort. Why did the buzzing bother him?

  Shasta was smiling again, all traces of displeasure gone.

  It made Kai happy to stand close enough to see the brush of stubble across the man’s pale cheeks. The buzzing leveled up and filled his head, too loud to be ignored.

  A thick cloud of LightSuckers erupted from the hedge and hung motionless for a second. Then in a slow, deliberate way, they began flying towards Kai en masse.

  Sweat broke out on his forehead, between his fingers. Fear rose from his belly. The LightSuckers were homing in, targeting him.

  “What is that? Around your neck?”

  Kai shook his head. It would be wrong to let him have Zee’s necklace. As much as he longed to please the man, he couldn’t do that.

  “Give it me.” A smile played on his lips, and Kai felt a slide in his resistance. It was just a silly necklace after all.

  Zee flashed through his mind…and an image of Runt risking everything to get the necklace, and finally throwing it to him as she was carried off.

  No.

  “It’s nothing.” Two words, but the effort of speaking them sapped his energy. “I can’t.”

  Disappointment curled through Shasta’s features and Kai’s heart broke.

  “I didn’t want it to come to this, but you leave me no choice.”

  Fear broke the spell that Shasta’s voice had woven through Kai and he ran.

  Something hard smacked into the back of his head and he fell face-first in the dirt, tumbling into a whirlpool of blind nothingness.

  ~*~

  The restraints on Kai’s arms dug into his flesh. He pulled hard, testing for any sign of weakness, but whoever had tied him up had done their job well. His legs were strapped to a chair straight out of a dentist’s surgery—an exact replica of the one in the Recruiters van, but without the crack. That was something to be grateful for at least. No crack to pinch his rear. Unlike the van, this room had cement walls that were covered floor-to-ceiling in lit-up and humming electronic equipment.

  Two men in lab coats came in looking freshly evicted from bed. The younger of the two yawned as he hooked Kai up to the console. The other had his back to them, bowed over a keyboard and a bank of buttons and sliders. Making sure Kai couldn’t get loose, the younger man turned to help the other and they started arguing.

  Rescuing Zee had been a spectacular failure. Not only had he gotten caught, but he’d lost Runt in the chaos. This was Bree all over again. His best attempts, most noble intentions, fell short every time. What
a complete failure he was. So much so, that he wanted to laugh. Laughing at being useless was completely inappropriate, but he couldn’t hold in a snort and a chuckle.

  The men stopped arguing to frown at him. He breathed deep, schooling his features into what he thought was a suitably dour expression for a prisoner. “Sorry about that. Carry on.”

  “I don’t trust this one. Let’s get this over with and get out of here.”

  “You run his history?”

  “You can’t be serious. Do you know how long that takes?”

  “Do it.”

  Kai cleared his throat. “So have you two been here long?” Maybe if he got them talking, he could find out where Runt had been taken. The odd pair seemed familiar. The flat of the older one’s back was all he got from him, but the younger one turned to answer.

  “Me? Only about five years.” He thumbed towards the other, “He’s been here for over a decade.” He squinted at Kai, head tilting sideways. “Hey, haven’t we seen you before?”

  “Shut up, Dax. Never talk to them. You know that. What is wrong with you?”

  Dax. Dax and Vin from the digger tunnels. Yet they didn’t look as they did back then, back there.

  Dax shrugged apologetically and turned away.

  Vin drew in breath sharply. “This is not good.”

  “That is why we run background. I told you!” The older man jabbed at the screen with a crooked finger. Kai craned his neck but couldn’t see what was causing such a stir.

  “What do we do?”

  “Get Torn. He needs to see this.”

  A few minutes later, Muscles came in. He was even bigger in person than he’d looked earlier on the training ground holding Zee’s hand. He threw a mere glance Kai’s way before immersing himself in the data rolling up the screens.

  Vin rubbed his sweaty neck. “He’s too far gone, Torn, you’ll not get him back.”

  Torn turned slowly. His eyes narrowed as he studied Kai, strapped to the chair. “Show me what we’re working with.”

  “Are you sure—”