The Lies That Define Us

by Micalea Smeltzer

“Never going to happen.” His smile disappeared, and his eyes darkened from icy-blue to a gray color. “I don’t have time for hearts and flowers shit.” He glared out at the ocean like it had personally offended him somehow. His shoulders were bunched taut beneath his thin cotton shirt, but they slowly relaxed as he let out a breath. Scrubbing a hand over his face, he turned to me once more. “But maybe I do have room in my life for one more friend.”

  “Friend?” I repeated the word like I’d never heard it before.

  “Yeah.” He stood up straight and crossed his arms over his chest. “Maybe we can be friends.”

  I nodded, mulling over his words. “Maybe,” I agreed.

  He held out a hand to me then. “So, friend, are you coming to the pier with us? Don’t make me break my mom’s heart.”

  “I’ll go with you guys.” I put my hand in his, and he helped me back over the side of the wall. Once I was back on solid ground, he let go of my hand immediately, and I followed him inside.

  His parents were lingering in the kitchen, and the way his mom was smiling at us I knew I’d been right to think she was watching us from the door.

  “Are you joining us at the pier?” she asked me with a large smile. Her husband was busy snacking on a bag of chips and seemed completely oblivious to everything. I said seemed because I got the impression he was one of those people that actually noticed everything while appearing not to care. Exactly like Liam.

  “Yeah. I’ve never been. It should be fun.” Pointing in the direction of the stairs, I said, “I’ll go change.”

  I ran out of the kitchen like my ass was on fire. I couldn’t take Remy grinning at Liam and me like we were the cutest thing she’d ever seen. She was nice, and I didn’t want to break her heart by informing her that I’d never like her son in that way.

  Lie.

  Once in the safety of my room, I closed and locked the door.

  I rummaged through my drawers, searching for something to wear. I had plenty of options to choose from thanks to Liam. I’d been livid that he’d bought me any clothes, especially so many and such nice ones because he’d acted like such a jerk, and I didn’t want to be indebted to him in any way more than I already was. I realized then, though, that what you saw on the outside of Liam wasn’t the truth. He had a heart; a kind one that he liked to hide. But at certain times, that kindness shone brighter than the sun, like with the clothes, or the fact that he agreed to let me—a stranger—stay with him because I was homeless.

  I chose a pair of high-waisted light-wash jeans and a lacy, white crop-top with thin spaghetti straps. Since the shorts came up higher there was only a small sliver of my stomach exposed, so it wasn’t overly revealing. For my feet, I slipped on a pair of strappy gray sandals.

  I’d accumulated a small amount of makeup thanks to Rebecca. She’d been horrified when I told her I didn’t have any. The next day before work she’d given me a small bag with a shrug. “It’s not much,” she had said, “but it’s something.”

  The bag had contained three different glosses—pink, clear, and coral—a nude-colored lipstick, mascara, a shimmery gold eye shadow, and a tube of black eyeliner. I’d laughed at all the lip stuff, and she told me that to her lip gloss and lipstick were the most important makeup staples. Her exact words were, “When I put on lipstick I automatically feel like I can conquer the world.”

  I didn’t think I’d be conquering the world that day, but putting on a little makeup did make me feel better. I brushed some of the eyeshadow onto my lids, blending it in before lining the top and bottom carefully with liner. I added a heavy coating of mascara to make my lashes appear even thicker and darker.

  “Dammit,” I cursed, when the mascara wand touched my lid and left behind a black streak.

  I wiped it away with a wet cloth, but that seemed to only make it worse.

  “Oh, come on,” I complained at my reflection.

  I finally removed the black smear and breathed a sigh of relief.

  I fumbled around for a gloss to put on my lips and ended up with a pink one. It was one of those plumping glosses, and my lips began to tingle when I swiped it over them.

  I nodded at my reflection, pleased with how the look had turned out—considering I was new at the whole makeup thing.

  I fluffed my curled hair before pinning a few pieces back away from my face. I played with the ends for a few seconds, still not accustomed to seeing my normal dark hair.

  I’d been Scarlett for so long that Ariella had begun to fade from my memory.

  That’s when I’d known it was time to try to make my escape. I’d been patient and waited for the perfect moment. It hadn’t taken long. Blaise trusted me. He believed me to be completely brain-washed into his submissive drone, but I was stronger than that. My mind refused to break, even when he pushed it to the brink.

  Inhaling a deep breath, I turned away from the mirror.

  I grabbed my small crossbody purse from the top of the dresser and hurried downstairs to where Liam and his parents were waiting in the family room.

  When they saw me, they all stood from the couch.

  “Ready?” Liam asked when no one else spoke.

  “Mhm.” I nodded, clutching my hands around the strap of my bag.

  Liam awkwardly shuffled his feet before muttering, “M’kay, well then.” He hurried by me and down the hallway to the garage.

  His parents exchanged amused looks before their gazes landed on me. I made a squeaking noise in the back of my throat, and my cheeks flushed.

  I turned quickly and speed-walked down the wall. I heard his parents speaking in hushed tones behind me, and I prayed to God that they weren’t talking about Liam and me, but I knew chances were pretty high that they were.

  Liam was already in the driver’s seat of his Jeep, and I started to get in the back, but his mom stopped me.

  “No, no, sit up front with Liam. Mathias and I are going to follow in our car.” She pointed outside to a slick-looking sports car.

  “Oh, okay.” My hand fell slowly from the back door and moved back around the front of the car to the passenger seat. “Your mom said they’re following in their car,” I hissed the words quietly under my breath like it was some kind of secret.

  Liam chuckled and reached over to turn the volume up on the radio. “She thinks she’s so clever.” He ruffled his fingers through his hair, and a muscle in his jaw ticked.

  “Are you mad?” I asked softly.

  He glanced up at me, surprise in his eyes. I didn’t know what he was so surprised about. It was merely a question. Then again, maybe it was the way I asked it so hesitantly. I had a fire in me. One that was shining brighter and brighter every day. But after years of having to keep quiet and only doing what I was told, it was hard to not let that fear creep back in every now and then. With Blaise, I was supposed always speak quietly, never meet his eyes, and never speak back. Any time Liam acted even the smallest bit like Blaise—jaw clenched, harsh words, anger in his eyes—I was shoved back into my old ways.

  Stay quiet.

  Keep your head down.

  Do what you’re told.

  I’d been nothing but a submissive slave. I feared stepping even a millimeter out of line—I’d seen and heard enough to know a mistake like that meant death.

  That’s another thing—when people force you to act like a shadow, you become one. They forget you’re there, and when they forget, they do horrible things right in front of you.

  Remembering that I was with Liam, not back in that hell, I raised my eyes to his.

  You’re stronger than this, Ari, I told myself. Otherwise you wouldn’t have made it this far.

  “I’m not mad. I’m never mad.” He cracked a smile at that, and I felt my own lips raise.

  “Did you just crack a joke?” I joked as he put the Jeep in reverse.

  He glanced at me, and his lips twitched with carefully-contained laughter. “Maybe.”

  “Mhm,” I hummed in response, fighting a grin.

 
; He cleared his throat as he turned the Jeep out of the driveway. “Where’d you go a minute ago? It was like you were lost or something.”

  “One truth a day, remember, Liam?” My voice had an edge to it.

  His head swiveled quickly to me and back to the road, but I didn’t miss his surprised look.

  He stared at the road, his eyes narrowed in thought.

  He was thinking, pondering, wondering what exactly was going on with me.

  Liam wasn’t stupid, I knew that, and it wouldn’t take him long to figure out that the secrets I held were bigger than something trivial.

  My secrets were life and death.

  My memories were covered in the blood of others and the loss of my own innocence.

  But he’d never know that.

  He couldn’t, because the truth would get him killed just like it would me.

  Blaise was looking for me. I knew it just as surely as I knew my name. And when he found me, he’d take not only my life but the ones around me.

  I’d only hoped I’d be long gone from this place before he caught up to me.

  I had to keep moving.

  It wouldn’t be long until I had to say goodbye.

  To Ollie and Talia.

  Rebecca and Darren.

  And Liam.

  My dark angel that refused to let his light shine.

  Liam

  Ari acted like she’d never seen a pier before.

  Maybe she hadn’t.

  It wasn’t like I knew much about her besides she liked to draw, she had the deepest blue eyes I’d ever seen, and she liked to cook. Beyond that, she was a stranger to me. Our daily truths would hopefully help me to get to know her better.

  We stood in the parking lot, waiting for my parents to park. A black SUV pulled in beside them, and my dad’s bodyguards stepped out. The four of them started toward us, and Ari looked up at me with questioning eyes. A piece of dark hair blew across her face, the strands sticking to her glossy lips, and before I could stop myself, I’d reached out and plucked the hair away from her lips. I quickly let go like my fingers had been scalded.

  “Who are those guys with your parents? They look scary.” Her eyes shifted nervously back and forth. Something told me she was two seconds away from bolting.

  “You seriously don’t know, do you?” I couldn’t keep the mystified tone from my voice. That girl…she shocked me at every turn.

  “No,” she said slowly. She looked up at me with confused eyes. “What should I know?”

  “My name is Liam Wade,” I enunciated my last name, “and my dad is Mathias Wade.”

  Did she seriously have no clue?

  A line appeared between her brows, and her nose crinkled in thought. Finally, her lips parted in a perfect O.

  “Oh my God,” she breathed, shaking her head, “now it all makes so much sense.” She glanced up at me, and I was taken aback by the fact that she wasn’t looking at me any differently. She’d figured it out, and it didn’t matter to her. That was a first. I was used to people figuring out my familial connections and immediately looking at me with stars in their eyes and outstretched hands.

  “What makes sense, exactly?” I questioned, shoving my hands in my pockets. My parents were seconds away from joining us.

  “Why you crave privacy so much,” she replied, gathering her hair and sweeping it down one side of her neck.

  My parents and the two bodyguards stopped in front of us. I’d grown up my whole life having guards follow us pretty much everywhere. Back home in Virginia, we’d had more privacy away from the media and they weren’t really necessary unless we ventured into D.C. or New York City. On tours they were always present, and when we’d stayed in L.A. during recording times. I’d attended a normal high school for my last three years of school, but before that I’d been homeschooled. I’d basically put my foot down—Willow and me, that is—and demanded to have a little bit of normalcy. All of the band members had agreed that it was time for their kids to live semi-normal lives, so thanks to us, everyone went to a regular school. Although, while most of us went to a public school, the band’s bass player, Ezra, and his wife, Sadie, had put both of their kids, Everett and Everly, in a private school.

  “Shall we?” I waggled my finger in the direction of the pier.

  I didn’t find the pier all that exciting; there were a few shops and restaurants, plus an arcade, and that was about it.

  “Lead the way,” my dad said with an amused smile.

  He and my mom were up to no fucking good, and we’d yet to have a “talk”, so I knew it was only a matter of time until they cornered me. They wouldn’t leave until they got me to talk, I’d deduced that much, but at least for now they were distracted trying to play matchmaker.

  Ari fell into step beside me as we headed out onto the pier. My parents and the guards trailed behind us, and I heard the quiet whisperings of my parent’s hushed voices. I knew they were talking about the two of us, so behind my back, I gave them the finger. My dad chuckled and said loud enough for me to hear, “No doubt he’s my kid.”

  Ari glanced over her shoulder behind us. “What’d you do?” she asked, no doubt having heard my dad.

  “Nothing.” I grinned innocently down at her.

  She rolled her eyes and snorted—I knew I’d looked anything but innocent. At least I tried.

  She glanced to her left at a little boy and girl standing with their father, fishing over the side of the pier.

  “Daddy! Daddy! I got something!” the boy cried, reeling his line in. It came up empty, and the child let out a dejected sigh. “Never mind.”

  The dad helped him cast his line back out into the water. “It’s not about catching a fish,” the dad bent and looked into his son’s eyes, “it’s about having the patience to wait.”

  His words rang with too much truth.

  All my life I’d been chasing something. Running toward a future I thought I wanted and needed, but I was never happy. I needed to learn to have the patience to wait.

  “That’s so cute,” Ari commented, pointing at the man and his children.

  I nodded as we passed them.

  I was trying my best to ignore her, but I’d known from the moment I laid eyes on her in Ollie’s kitchen she was someone I couldn’t stay away from.

  Ari skittered past me then, nearly knocking me over in her haste to reach the railing of the pier.

  “Jesus, woman,” I muttered, trying to right myself before I embarrassed myself by falling.

  “Look, Liam. Look.” She pointed eagerly over the railing. She looked so young and innocent in that moment, and something inside me stirred. Something animalistic and protective.

  I strode over to the railing and stood beside her leaning over it. Below us, a pod of dolphins swam, their fins skimming the surface. Their clicking noises echoed up to us, and Ari looked down at them in awe.

  She grasped the railing and leaned over. Her hand slipped, and she lost her balance, falling forward.

  “Ari,” I cried, and my hands shot out to grab her waist, hauling her ass back onto land. I held her against my chest, both of our breaths ragged. “What the fuck were you thinking?” I turned her in my arms so she was looking up at me.

  “I just wanted to be closer to them.” She frowned, tilting her head back to the water.

  “Don’t do that,” I ground out. “You could’ve fallen in and hurt yourself.” I squeezed her hip roughly—in warning or in play, I didn’t know—and let her go.

  “Worried about me?” She waggled her brows in jest, but her words hit me hard.

  I was growing to care about her, and caring led to so many other things. Like worry.

  “Nah, not at all.” I shrugged off her words and clasped my hands as I leaned against the railing, trying to seem indifferent.

  Distance yourself, Liam. You have to.

  But I couldn’t. Not with Ari. I kept getting pulled closer and closer to her. The more I tugged against the string, the faster I was yanked back in. I
scrubbed my hands down my face. I was so fucked and not in a good way.

  “You’re such a liar,” she taunted, leaning over the railing again. Thank God she didn’t try to hurl her whole body over it that time. Instead, she stood on her tiptoes, staring down at the dolphins with a smile on her face. She tilted her head up to me and sobered. “But so am I.”

  “Is that so?” I raised a brow and leaned my hip against the railing.

  She nodded and tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. “Lies are easier to swallow than the truth.”

  “Why’s that?” I inquired, curious to know her answer.

  “Because the truth is just that—the truth. It’s fact. Indisputable. With lies we can delude ourselves into believing something that doesn’t really exist. If you tell yourself something enough, it begins to feel like the truth, but that’s just another lie.”

  “What’s with your fascination with truth and lies?” I braced my arms on the railing and leaned closer to her, inspecting her through the dark lenses of my sunglasses.

  She pursed her lips and seemed to be taking my question seriously. “It’s not that, really, that fascinates me so much. It’s the lengths the human mind will go to in order to stay sane.”

  I absorbed her words, repeating each one over in my mind. I pulled the words apart and put them back together.

  “What the hell happened to you?” I ground out.

  She looked up at me with surprised, frightened eyes. “N-Nothing,” she stuttered, sweeping her hair forward to hide her face.

  “Ahem.” My dad cleared his throat, and I turned around to find him, my mom, and the two guards standing there staring at us. I’d completely forgotten about them. “Should we continue?” My dad waved his hand forward at the rest of the pier.

  “Yeah, sure,” I muttered, hanging my head. “Ari?” I prompted, but when I looked in her direction, she had already gone ahead of us. She had her arms cradled against her chest, her body bent slightly forward in a protective stance, and her bag thumped at her side.

  I pressed the heels of my hands to my eyes and let out a groan.

  Women.

  “You should apologize.” My dad clapped his hand down on my shoulder.