The Swan Maid

by Dilly Court

  ‘It’s a girl, my lady. You have a lovely daughter.’

  Aurelia waved her away. ‘I wanted a boy. What use is a girl except to sell into marriage?’

  ‘But she’s beautiful, like you, my lady.’ Lottie looked to Mary, who was washing her hands.

  ‘Let her rest, child. She’ll come round to motherhood soon enough.’

  ‘Don’t talk about me as if I weren’t here,’ Aurelia said angrily. ‘I don’t want her. Dashwood won’t want a girl child. He’s always wanted a son.’ Her voice broke on a sob and she closed her eyes.

  ‘It affects some women this way,’ Mary said in a low voice. ‘Take no notice. She’ll change her mind when she’s had a sleep.’

  ‘Thank you for everything,’ Lottie said, rocking the baby in her arms. ‘I know she’ll love her little girl once she gets used to the idea.’

  ‘Sure she will, but for now let’s leave her. I want that cup of tea laced with rum, and you look as though a tot would do you good, too.’

  Lottie glanced round the small cabin. ‘We’ve nothing for a baby, Mrs Seacole. Not even a crib or any garments.’

  Mary met her anxious gaze with a knowing look. ‘I guessed as much, but a layette is one thing I haven’t got on my list of necessities for the army.’ She stroked the baby’s downy head with the tip of her finger. ‘A drawer will do for a cot, and I have some bolts of cloth. I guess you can sew, as can I. We could use the time we have on board to make a few little garments for her, and I have a lace shawl that I’ll be proud to give the young lady as a christening present. We’ll go to my cabin and I’ll look it out now.’

  ‘There’s just one thing,’ Lottie said when they were safely out of earshot. ‘I think Lady Aurelia would rather that this birth was kept secret for now. It’s a delicate matter …’

  Mary laid her hand on Lottie’s shoulder, that same knowing look in her dark eyes. ‘I won’t say a word. I’ve done my bit and I leave it to the colonel’s lady to introduce her child to the world, or not, as the case may be. In the meantime I’m darned hungry and very thirsty. Let’s go and see if the cook has risen, and if not I’ll take charge of the galley myself. I’m very good in the kitchen.’

  ‘But I can’t leave the baby unattended.’

  ‘We’ll make the little one comfortable in my cabin for the time being, but she’ll need to suckle soon. Lady or not, Mrs Dashwood will have to look after the poor little mite.’

  Later, having breakfasted on pancakes and bacon cooked on the galley stove by Mrs Seacole herself, Lottie carried the baby, swaddled in Mary’s second-best shawl, to the cabin. Aurelia was awake and sitting up.

  ‘I thought I’d been deserted,’ she said, pouting. ‘I’m hungry and thirsty.’

  ‘I’ll fetch you some breakfast, but I thought you’d like to hold your baby. She’s a little poppet and she has the bluest eyes you’ve ever seen.’

  ‘Dashwood’s eyes are brown, and she looks nothing like him. I can’t arrive with a baby in my arms. He’ll never believe that she’s his.’

  ‘I’m sorry, my lady, but I don’t see what’s changed.’

  ‘A daughter isn’t the same as a son. Dashwood won’t have any interest in a girl child.’

  ‘But Lieutenant Gillingham will love her dearly.’

  ‘He won’t know. I’ve thought it through and I’m not going to tell him. The easiest way out is for me to pass her off as an orphan I’ve picked up on the way, or perhaps I can find a peasant woman who will take her.’

  ‘My lady, that’s terrible. You mustn’t think like that.’

  Aurelia’s eyes flashed angrily. ‘Who are you to tell me what I may or may not do? She’s my child and I’ll see that she’s well cared for, but this gives me a way out. Can’t you see that?’

  ‘No, my lady. She’s a helpless babe and she’s your flesh and blood.’

  ‘Stop talking like that. I’ve made up my mind. You must look after her and I won’t even hold her, so there can be no chance of me developing an affection for the infant.’

  ‘You’re going to give her away?’

  ‘Yes, and I want you to swear that you’ll keep my secret.’

  ‘I will, if that’s what you really want, but she will need to be fed soon.’

  ‘There are cows in the hold. I heard them last night. I don’t want her near me.’

  ‘Aren’t you even going to give her a name?’

  ‘Call her what you like, but take her away. I don’t want to look at her.’

  Lottie could see that this was going nowhere and she took the infant back to Mary’s cabin.

  ‘What will I do?’ she asked anxiously. ‘Lady Aurelia won’t even hold her own baby. She’s determined to give her away.’

  Mary looked up from the bolt of cotton she was about to cut into. ‘Leave it to me, child.’ She put the scissors down and raised herself to her feet. ‘Wait here and I’ll have a word with her ladyship.’

  ‘I’m afraid she won’t listen to you, Mrs Seacole.’

  Mary turned her head and grinned. ‘There ain’t nothing that a determined Jamaican woman cannot do when she sets her mind to it.’ She left the cabin with a purposeful toss of her head.

  Lottie sat on the edge of the bunk, rocking the sleeping baby in her arms. ‘I won’t let her give you away, Molly,’ she said out loud. The name had sprung to her lips bringing with it long-forgotten memories of her own mother. The once-familiar scent of her perfume came back to Lottie in a waft of fragrance, far different from the overpowering smell of smoke and oil that pervaded the ship, and the ever-present odours from the hold where the cattle existed in miserable conditions. ‘Molly,’ she said again, savouring the word. ‘That was my mother’s name, little Molly. She had beautiful blue eyes, just like yours. From now on you will always be Molly to me.’ She looked up as the door opened and Mary beckoned to her.

  ‘Give me the baby. I’ve managed to convince Lady Aurelia that she must suckle the babe for her own sake, let alone that of the child,’ Mary said with a wink and a broad grin. ‘I told her it’s the best and quickest way to get her figure back.’

  Lottie laid the sleeping infant in Mary’s arms. ‘Does that mean she’ll keep Molly?’

  ‘I like that name, but it might be best if we keep it to ourselves for now. And in answer to your question, I don’t believe she’s changed her mind, but we’ll have to wait and see. According to the captain it’s going to take a day or two more to reach Balaklava. Maybe the lady will learn to love her child, maybe not.’

  Lottie stood on deck as the ship negotiated the narrow inlet that forged its way between high cliffs and opened out into a small harbour, bristling with the masts of ships. The Albatross moved slowly through the channel between tightly packed vessels. It was dark in the shadow of the steeply rising land, and lowering clouds brushed the tops of the hills with a swirling white mist. A feeling of gloom and despondency was made worse by the stench of rotting animal carcasses, and the water was thick with driftwood and all kinds of detritus. The town itself looked to be damaged beyond repair by the November hurricane. Tumbledown wooden shacks fronted the wharf, and their broken windows gazed blindly at the scene of destruction of what had once been a thriving community. Pantile roofs were shattered and the stucco was peeling off the more substantial buildings in huge flakes.

  It was not a welcoming sight. Lottie turned to Mary, who was at her side, gazing at the devastation with a determined set to her jaw.

  ‘I can see there is work for me here,’ Mary said firmly. ‘My services will be much needed.’

  ‘It’s not the place for her ladyship.’ Hansford had come up behind them and his expression was grim. ‘She can’t be expected to live here.’

  ‘Nor I,’ Mary said with a wry smile. ‘I have to see to the unloading of my stores, but I’ve spoken to the captain, and the Albatross has to leave almost immediately. He suggests that I remove to the Medora for the duration of my stay here, but my intention is to build my British Hotel somewhere inland. It will be
a haven where our brave soldiers will find comfort and enjoy some respite from the horrors of war. It will be done, I promise you.’

  Lottie had no doubt that Mary Seacole could do anything she set her mind to, but that was not her problem. She turned to Hansford. ‘We have to send a message to Colonel Dashwood, informing him of our arrival.’

  ‘I can see a soldier waiting on the wharf, miss,’ Hansford said, pointing to a man wearing the familiar uniform. ‘I believe they are expecting us.’

  ‘I’d better go and tell her ladyship.’ Lottie made a move towards the companionway. ‘And Mrs Fothergill, of course,’ she added with a wry smile.

  Hansford nodded, his expression carefully controlled. ‘Yes, miss. And I’ll see about getting us ashore without getting our feet wet.’

  Lottie went first to Mrs Fothergill’s cabin and found her dressed in her best outfit with a plumed hat pinned to her elaborate coiffure. ‘Yes, I was expecting to be met,’ she said calmly. ‘My husband will have organised our accommodation. I demand only the best, and I’m sure that Colonel Dashwood will have made suitable arrangements for Lady Aurelia.’

  ‘Yes, ma’am.’

  ‘By the way,’ Mrs Fothergill said as Lottie was about to leave the cabin, ‘I thought I heard a baby crying last night. Do you know anything about a child on board?’

  ‘No, ma’am,’ Lottie said, crossing her fingers behind her back as the lie tripped off her tongue. ‘Perhaps it was seagulls. They sound much the same.’

  ‘I suppose so.’ Mrs Fothergill turned to Cole, who was hovering behind her. ‘Get along with you, woman. Make sure that all my luggage is transferred to the shore. I’ll be very angry if anything goes missing.’

  Lottie left them and hurried to the cabin she had been sharing with Aurelia. ‘We’ve landed at last,’ she said eagerly. ‘But Mrs Fothergill is suspicious. She thought she heard a baby crying.’

  Aurelia finished buttoning her blouse. ‘The sooner we find a woman to take the child, the better.’

  ‘Are you sure, my lady?’ Lottie picked up the sleeping baby and hitched her over her shoulder, receiving a milky burp for her trouble. She smiled. ‘She is a little poppet and hardly ever cries.’

  ‘She’s your responsibility now, Lottie. I’ve done my duty by her and I’m giving her to you.’

  ‘You don’t mean that, my lady. You’ll change your mind once you’ve recovered your health and strength.’

  ‘I am well enough and I won’t relent. The child is yours.’

  ‘But how am I to hide her? What do I do if she wakes up and cries? And she’ll need another feed in a few short hours.’

  ‘I don’t know and I don’t care. I’m a free woman now. The fact that she arrived early has liberated me and I don’t have to lie to Dashwood. Find a wet nurse. There must be army wives in the town who will do almost anything for a few shillings.’ Aurelia opened her valise and took out a small leather pouch. She tossed it at Lottie. ‘That should be enough to pay a peasant to take the child.’

  ‘Are you absolutely certain about this, my lady? Oughtn’t you to tell Lieutenant Gillingham that he is a father? Hasn’t he the right to know?’

  ‘Listen to me, Lottie. We have enjoyed a close relationship of necessity during our travels, but from now on you will concentrate on the duties for which you are paid. I am resuming my position in society, and in the army, and you have to know your place. Do I make myself understood?’

  Lottie hugged the baby to her. ‘Yes, my lady. Perfectly.’

  Their disembarkation complete, their guide led them through the muddy streets. The filth and devastation shocked Lottie to the core. The worst places she had seen in the East End of London were as nothing compared to a town ravaged by the after-effects of war and the vicious destruction caused by the hurricane. The day was overcast and menacing clouds hugged the tops of the hills surrounding Balaklava. It seemed to her like the entrance to hell, and in the distance she could hear the continuous thunder of cannon fire. Their guide seemed oblivious to everything other than the need to take them to the residence of Major Stomati, the second-in-command of the local militia, where Lord Raglan had made his headquarters.

  The substantial stone building had escaped damage and they were greeted by a young lieutenant who ushered them into a whitewashed entrance hall that echoed to the sound of their footsteps.

  ‘If you would care to follow me, my lady …? The major-general’s wife has already arrived.’

  ‘My husband, Colonel Dashwood, should be here very soon,’ Aurelia said confidently. ‘I trust that suitable accommodation has been arranged for us.’

  ‘Come this way, my lady.’ The lieutenant walked on, and with Molly concealed beneath her cloak, Lottie prayed silently that the baby would remain sleeping as she followed Aurelia, with Hansford bringing up the rear.

  Mrs Fothergill and Cole were ensconced in the only two comfortable chairs in the sparsely furnished reception room. ‘We’ve been offered accommodation in Lord Raglan’s residence until my husband puts in an appearance,’ Mrs Fothergill said proudly. ‘Lord Raglan is most hospitable.’

  Aurelia sat down heavily on a camp stool. ‘Were we mentioned, Cordelia? Is there any news from Dashwood?’

  Lottie kept in the background, clutching her cloak around her and hoping that Molly would not be woken by the babble of voices. She glanced at Hansford, who was watching her with his usual inscrutable expression, and she wondered if he had guessed the truth.

  ‘No news,’ Mrs Fothergill said smugly. ‘No doubt he will send for you soon, although I’m not sure whether there is room here for you and your servants.’ She turned to the lieutenant. ‘Is there any suitable accommodation for a senior officer’s wife, Lieutenant Bonney? I saw several rows of huts not too far from here.’

  Bonney flushed uncomfortably. ‘I will enquire, madam.’

  ‘Where is my husband stationed?’ Aurelia demanded. ‘A messenger must be sent to apprise him of my arrival.’

  ‘The telegraph is installed and working at least as far as the monastery, my lady. The colonel has been informed, but this is the Crimea and roads are just tracks; getting from one place to another takes time.’

  Molly stirred and made a little whimpering noise and Lottie covered her mouth, pretending to smother a cough. Aurelia shot her a meaningful glance. ‘I have been unwell during our journey,’ she said hastily. ‘I would appreciate a private room while I await news from my husband.’

  ‘You have been unwell?’ Mrs Fothergill narrowed her eyes so that she looked like a cat getting ready to pounce. ‘You were never unwell at sea, Aurelia. It is I who was struck down by seasickness during our voyages. I should have privacy, and if my room is ready I will retire until luncheon.’

  Lottie could feel Molly stirring and she was afraid the poor child would suffocate beneath the heavy folds of the cloak. She coughed again. ‘Might I go outside, my lady? I am in need of fresh air.’

  ‘Yes, go.’ Aurelia dismissed her with a wave of her hand, but her gaze was fixed on Mrs Fothergill and her lips were folded into a thin, angry line.

  ‘I’ll show you the way, miss.’ Lieutenant Bonney escorted her through a series of rooms and out through the servants’ quarters. It was a small house compared to similar residences at home, and the kitchen was little more than a lean-to. Lottie could see servants rushing around and a male cook was shouting orders. It reminded her of The Swan, and for the first time she had a pang of homesickness.

  ‘I will ask the cook to make a pot of tea, miss.’ Bonney gave her a searching look, and his pleasant features puckered into a look of concern. ‘Take a seat in the courtyard and I’ll have it sent out to you.’

  ‘Thank you.’ Lottie gave him a tired smile. ‘Are you with the Telegraph Detachment?’

  ‘I’m in charge of the commissary, miss.’

  ‘I hoped you might know a friend of mine, Private Ellis.’

  ‘I don’t know him personally. There are many different units here.’

 
Another small whimper from Molly rapidly turned into a mewling cry and Lottie was forced to uncover the baby. She met Lieutenant Bonney’s startled gaze with an attempt at a smile.

  ‘Lady Aurelia saved the child,’ she said, thinking quickly. ‘The mother was trying to sell her to the highest bidder in Constantinople, and her ladyship took pity on the little mite.’

  ‘I’m afraid children are not allowed in the barracks.’

  ‘I know that, but she needs a wet nurse,’ Lottie said, hopefully. ‘Are there any army wives who have recently given birth and might be glad to earn some extra money? Lady Aurelia is very generous.’

  ‘I do know of one such woman,’ he said thoughtfully. ‘She lost her husband and her infant within days of each other.’

  ‘Is she available now? The baby is hungry.’

  Molly began to cry in earnest and Lieutenant Bonney backed towards one of the outbuildings. ‘I’ll make enquiries right away.’ He disappeared into one of the wooden sheds.

  Lottie rocked Molly in her arms, hoping that she would quieten down or go to sleep, but the baby was not to be comforted. After what seemed like an hour, but could not have been more than ten minutes, the sound of approaching footsteps made Lottie look up hopefully. A young woman came hurryingtowards her with a tray of tea in her hands.

  ‘Lieutenant Bonney sent me to see you, miss.’ The woman moved a little closer, her gaze fixed longingly on Molly. ‘He told me about the babe, poor mite.’

  ‘She is an orphan.’

  ‘It’s a little girl.’ The woman’s eyes filled with tears and her bottom lip trembled. ‘May I hold her, miss?’

  Lottie laid the screaming infant in her outstretched arms. ‘Of course you may.’

  ‘I lost my little one two days ago.’ Tears spurted from the woman’s brown eyes as she held Molly close. ‘My husband succumbed to cholera, along with many others, and my baby went to heaven in the night. I don’t know why, but the angels must have taken her to join her pa.’