by Jillian Neal
That was also a lie. She knew what had happened. The final occurrence it had been her scream for their daddy that had stopped things from going further. It had also stopped it from ever happening again. Her little sister had been her saving grace.
“It’s fine. I know you’re only trying to help. Uh…” Natalie searched for something she could share with Holly to suture the wound she’d inflicted. “I can’t seem to stop thinking about him, actually.”
“That’s a good thing.” The sparkle returned to Holly’s eyes and a grin climbed across her face. “Anything specific?”
Remembering that she owed her sister for so many things, Natalie succumbed to her fate. “I really like his neck and his forearms and the way he does this thing with his lips that isn’t actually a smile or a smirk. It’s like a combo of the two but better. So, there is actually something wrong with me because that can’t possibly be normal.”
There were so many other things about Aaron that she found fascinating, but the way he listened to her, the way nothing ever seemed to frighten him, the low throaty notes of his voice that had taken on the consistency of gravel the night before when he’d told her that he thought about having sex with her, and the way his capable hands made her feel safe instead of terrified just weren’t things she wanted to share even with her sister. They were her own. A private sanctuary he didn’t even know he constructed for her every time they were together. A place she went in her head whenever the world was simply more than she had the willpower to deal with anymore.
Holly’s giggle eased a little of the strain between them. “Sorry to tell you this, sis, but you’re completely normal. A bad boy with good lips is hard to resist. Believe me, I would know.”
“I really don’t want to hear about your fascination with Dec’s lips. Thanks though.”
“His lips, the tattoo over his collarbone, and that place under his jaw where his beard is somehow a little scruffier.”
“Are what?” Natalie immediately regretted asking. The next pause in conversation she needed to escape. She didn’t even have anything to discuss with Holly yet. It had taken a dizzying amount of courage to brush a kiss on his stubbled cheek the night before. She hadn’t come up with another way to communicate that she wasn’t afraid of him before he’d dropped her off. She’d been aiming for his lips, and in her complete ineptitude had gotten his cheek. Stupid nerves.
“The first things I noticed about Dec that night in the bar.”
For some reason, Natalie’s brain failed to get the message to her mouth to stop talking. “Can I ask you something?”
“Yes.” The excitement in her sister’s tone shot another round of regret through Natalie’s veins. “That’s the whole reason we’re still in the barn.”
“Right. I just wondered if you slept with Dec on your first date or whatever? Did you go home with him from that bar?” I know you did because you’re not afraid. There’s nothing wrong with you. Why had she even asked?
“No.”
“You didn’t?”
Holly shook her head. “I offered, but he turned me down.”
“You’re such a liar. You two are like rabbits. I don’t believe he ever turned you down for anything.”
“Now we are, but he had a lot he had to deal with, Nat. Everyone has issues. We worked through them. We were actually on a one-week rule.”
“What’s a one-week rule?”
“No sex for the first week we dated.”
“Oh.” A cold wave of dread speared through her stomach as Natalie tried to determine if she’d be prepared to go through with this in one week’s time. Is that what Aaron thought would happen? Was one-week a thing? Is that what everyone else did, everyone who wasn’t afraid?
“It doesn’t have to be a week. It can be as long as you and Aaron want it to be.”
Natalie assumed it was a testament of their bond and the mastery of her classes that had Holly reading her mind
“Yeah, I know.” Stowing the brushes on the tack shelves kept Natalie from having to look her sister in the eye.
“Do something for me.”
“What?” She prayed whatever Holly wanted would be something she could provide.
“Don’t push yourself to do anything that makes you uncomfortable. He’ll be patient with you. I know Aaron’s going to understand a lot more than you think he will.”
CHAPTER SIX
“You came.” Aaron looked far more thrilled than was really necessary when Natalie scooted from the front door to the bar at Saddleback’s. That weird fizzy feeling in her stomach started up again as soon as she saw him.
“You texted me three times asking me to meet you here.” Natalie held up her phone. The dinner crowd was comprised of mostly ranch families. No one appeared to have had too much to drink as of yet. Her muscles eased and she focused on the grin Aaron was still sporting. Holly was right. His lips were awfully sexy.
“I know I did. Just wasn’t entirely sure you’d follow orders.” Another one of those winks assured her he was only teasing. If only she could convince the heat in her cheeks to lay off every time he did that, things would be good.
“Well, I don’t care for being ordered around, normally, but I wanted to see you.”
“Really? Well, trust me that feeling is very mutual. I get off in an hour. Want to go do something?”
“Isn’t that what dating is?”
“Yeah, I just didn’t want to assume that I got to be your evening plans, babe. I’m trying to make you think I’m cool.”
I think you’re so much more than cool. “And what would you be doing if you weren’t trying to make me think you’re cool?”
“Probably something that would show you just how fucking anxious I am to let every single asshole in this bar ogling your ass in those jeans know that you’re taken. I’m trying to quell my possessive side for the time being anyway.”
Whipping around to face the dining room again, Natalie’s mouth fell open. There was indeed a table of men in the back all staring at her. The ease she’d felt a moment before was ripped away from her. Chill bumps lifted every hair on her arms. She narrowed her eyes in a hateful scowl, lifted her chin and refused to show off the effect their lascivious gazes had on her. Crossing her arms over her chest, she tried to make herself as unappealing as she was able.
Suddenly, there was no longer a bar between her and Aaron. He was right beside her. “Hey, it’s okay, sweetheart. I’m right here. Can I hug you?”
She managed a slight nod and then found herself wrapped safely in the strength of his arms. Burying her face in his chest gave her lungs a heady dose of his musky scent. A shot of courage bolstered through her. A tender kiss landed on the top of her head. Would that be enough to let the men know that she wasn’t all alone? Was that enough to keep them away?
“I’ve got you. I’m sorry, I should’ve kept my mouth shut. I thought you saw them when you came in.”
“I was distracted.”
Another one of those hungry grunts sounded in her ear. Do that again. She wanted to beg. That sound, the low thrum of Aaron aroused, soothed her frayed nerves and fed the desire racing up her spine.
“You know you kill me when you say stuff like that, right? Hey, you say no if this makes you uncomfortable, but I could grab your sexy ass while they’re staring and let them know you’re mine.”
Utter delight zinged through Natalie. “Do it.” She tried not to giggle.
“Yes ma’am.” His massive hand cupped her right asscheek. When he squeezed, a breathy moan escaped her mouth without her permission. God, why did that feel so good? She rocked against him, colliding with his burgeoning erection, all heat and steel hard. Reminding herself they were standing in Saddleback’s, she bit her tongue to keep from asking if she could touch him.
“You feel what you do to me, sweetheart?”
She managed another nod.
“Tell me to stop, Nat, or I swear I’m never going to be able to.” Another grip of his hand brought a rush of
wet heat to the crotch of her panties.
“I don’t think I want you to stop either, but you’re going to get into trouble if Ed sees us.” One singular brain cell had come up with that bit of logic. She clung to it fiercely, lest she beg him to just keep going. Throwing caution to the wind was far too appealing as of late.
Making one more quick check of the men in the far corner, to make certain they’d gotten the message that she was not available to be gawked at, flirted with, or to have drinks procured in her honor, Natalie lifted her head and watched the dark fire she loved dance in his eyes when he stared at her.
“I’m stopping, I swear.” He patted her backside and then stepped back.
“What did you mean when you said I was killing you? And don’t work too hard to keep that possessive side under wraps. I like it.” She watched his head turn as he made a quick check of the bar and scan of the dining room. “Do you need me to let you work?”
“Nah. There’s nothing more important than you in my world currently, but you were right. I just needed to make sure Ed isn’t going to come out here and start busting my ass for not being behind the bar. He’s working the late shift tonight, but he’s not here yet. Look at me.”
Natalie’s gaze found his once again.
“I came up not having much to call my own. Sharing is a way of life in foster care. When I was in the army what was mine was also my team’s, and that was fine by me. But there haven’t ever been many things in this life that were all mine, and only for me. Whenever I get something that is just for me, I take care of it. My dogs, my truck, and my room. That’s been pretty much it, until you told me last night that you want us to date again. Possessiveness when it comes to you is as natural as breathing for me. I don’t need you to encourage it, because my God, I want to walk over there and knock heads together just because they looked at my girl, and thought about things that are going to belong only to me. Drives me crazy. But I also have no intention of scaring you again by showing off my caveman side. Just know this, I will always take care of what’s mine.”
“I keep trying to tell you I’m not scared of you. I don’t need you to fight my battles for me, but it’s kind of nice that you want to. I definitely don’t mind being someone that belongs to you and that you take care of. I feel the same way about you. Can’t we just take care of each other?” Measuring her words carefully, Natalie made certain she’d said all of that right.
“I don’t need to be taken care of. I just need to do right by you.”
She was just too sweet, too good, too innocent. He was an asshole for not turning her down the night before. He didn’t deserve her. He didn’t deserve anyone that wanted to take care of him. Just then, she nuzzled her face against his chest. That one tiny movement bolted his boots to the hardwood floor. He wasn’t going anywhere, not as long as she was in his arms.
“You plan on making drinks tonight, Weber, or is this job gettin’ in the way of your love life?” Ed stormed into the bar.
Shit. “I’m making drinks, Ed. Just took a quick break. Haven’t done that since we opened.”
“I’m not payin’ you to take breaks, son. I’m payin’ you to serve beer.”
“Yes, sir.” The words tasted like battery acid on his tongue. “Hang tight, babe. Let me do refills, and I’ll be right back.” Directing Natalie to a barstool, Aaron grabbed a pitcher of Bud Light and made the rounds.
When he neared the back table, he narrowed his eyes. “Keep your eyes to yourselves, gentlemen. I’m not in a forgiving mood. She’s taken.”
“Last time I checked the bartender gets no say in who I choose to look at. Pour me another, son.” The monogram on his shirt sleeve said the cattle rancher had more money than good sense. He drummed his fingers on the table.
The idiot next to him rolled his eyes and then checked his Rolex. “If we’re going to make Cheyenne by nightfall, we need to go, Dad.” Dad. What the hell? Aaron’s palms itched to beat the guy into oblivion, but Ed would make his life hell for fighting and Natalie would run. Not worth it.
“Nice example you’re setting for your kid, dumbass. You’ll make Cheyenne, because you’re leaving now. Last time I checked, anyone who makes my girl uncomfortable ends up eating parking lot gravel. I’m the bouncer and bartender here. Don’t let the door hit you in the ass, and pay your tab on the way out. The sheriff’s sitting right there.” Aaron pointed to Sheriff Wilheim reading the paper at a nearby table.
Removing their mugs from the table wasn’t nearly as satisfying as removing their eyes from their skulls would have been, but Aaron made do. “Out.” He pointed to the door.
When he returned to the bar, Natalie was wide-eyed with shock. “Did you make them leave because of me?”
“They’ve been on my nerves all afternoon. Been taking up a table for four hours and drinking way too slow. Hey, you want a drink while you’re here?” He knew she didn’t. He’d embarrassed her throwing the douchebags out. She wanted to leave. Stiffled motion seemed locked in her limbs.
For the moment, she was right where he’d left her, staring up at him. How the hell was this suddenly his life?
“Not really. What do you want to do when you get off?”
You, baby doll. Keeping that response locked behind his teeth, he shrugged. “Anything you want.”
Her bottom lip slipped through her teeth. His eyes locked on her mouth. When her fingertips located the horseshoe charm around her neck he realized his mistake. He should have made plans. Some boyfriend he was turning out to be. Scrambling for most anything nearby, which wasn’t much, he took a shot in the dark. “You wanna drive out to Ogallala and see a movie?”
“They’re redoing the theater. It won’t be open until Christmas. We could go get Lulu and Buster and take them over to Luke’s and play with them.”
While it was true that Aaron’s dogs had a grand time playing with Luke’s Beagles, Bailey and Bella, it couldn’t be a good sign that she wanted her big brother around for their date.
Aaron had been so intent on getting intel out of Dec and getting her to the bar he’d forgotten to plan anything. What the hell was wrong with him? Thinking about what had happened to her had scrambled his good senses. When he added in what she wanted from him he was rendered effectively useless. He had to get it together.
Keeping a mask of consideration firmly affixed to his face so she wouldn’t see how disappointed he was, he forced a nod. “We can do that if you want.”
“Do you want to?” Hesitation perforated her tone.
“I told you I’m good with anything you want to do. Lulu and Buster will be so freaking glad to see you they’ll lose their damn minds. They’ve missed you almost as much as I have. They’ve got to be sick of me by this point anyway.”
“I’ve missed them, too. I love them more than I love Bailey and Bella, just never tell Luke that.”
The things she said to him. The way she’d occasionally admit things without any pretense or plan. The way she loved his dogs. The remnants of his heart beat out its frantic approval. If she needed Luke around for the night, so be it. He’d make it work.
The lengthy list of things he’d rather do extended as he popped open the register drawer to clock out. Locating the jar he kept under the counter, he shoved his tip money into his pocket. Less than forty bucks. Working the lunch shift sucked.
He reminded himself that nothing was more important than simply being in Natalie’s presence, even if he was going to have to put up with her big brother.
He’d much prefer to get her out of the bar and get his hands up that light pink tank top she was wearing that was nothing more than an invitation to sin if he’d ever seen one. Only adding fuel to the fire in his groin was the fact that she had no idea how drop-dead gorgeous she looked, so innocent and sweet. Curious. Eager even, but for what she didn’t seem to know. The semi he was just going to have to get used to was quick to throb out its reminder that he could teach her anything she wanted to know.
Leaving bruising kiss
es on those lush lips, getting her drunk on him, showing her how good he could make it for her, marking her all for himself, exploring her body until he memorized the sounds she made at his touch, making her feel safe enough to explore, all tallied in his mind right behind showing her how beautiful she was. Ordering those thoughts away, he clung to the knowledge that pushing her too far, too fast would only end in disaster. He’d get her there, when the time was right.
Knowing the history behind your mission was one of the commandments of army intel. He had to keep everything in order and do nothing until she was ready.
Taking one more quick glance at the clock over the bar, he sighed. “Five more minutes. Then we can head to my house.”
“It’s fine.” She fidgeted with her necklace again. Focusing on slowing his breath, Aaron’s scrambled brain continued to try to come up with better plans for their evening. “Holly asked me about you before I came out here,” leapt from her mouth.
Clearly all of the Camdens were going to play a pretty big part in this relationship. He quelled his sigh this time. “Oh yeah? I don’t know Holly nearly as well as I know Dec. What’d she ask you?”
“You know how she is. She’s my baby sister, and she firmly believes she can help everyone. She thinks I should tell her everything going on with me. It’s annoying but that’s always how it’s been with us. She’s like that with everyone, really.”
“I have a few army buddies from my old team that get antsy if they don’t hear from me on the regular, even if I have nothing exciting to tell them. They’re my family. Is it kind of like that?”
Those golden flecks shimmered in her eyes as she studied him. Everything about her exploring gaze should have panicked him. Even after she’d run out of his house all those months ago, she always looked at him like she could see through him, like she already knew things he’d never tell her. It had been his job since he was barely eighteen years old to keep his personal shit to himself. What the hell was going on in that brain of hers when she stared him down?
