Heart of the Highlands: The Beast (Protectors of the Crown Book 1)

by Holthaus, April

  “Who is Sarah?” Keira asked.

  “His first wife.”

  “Wife? He’s been married before?”

  “Aye. Did he no’ tell ye?”

  “Nay,” Keira hastily replied.

  “My apologies, my lady. I did no’ mean to upset ye. I should no’ have gone sticking my nose in other people’s affairs. I am sorry, my lady.”

  “Tis alright. Ye dinna know. Please tell me. What happened?”

  “I really shouldnae, my lady.”

  “Please!”

  The maid looked at her with heartfelt sympathy. Keira took a seat on the bed and waited for the maid to share what she knew. She was completely taken by surprise by this new revelation into Ian’s dark past. Up to this point, she’d only viewed him as a selfish bastard with a heart made of steel. But now she knew why he was the way he was. He had been broken. To break a man, especially one as resilient as Ian, would not have been an easy feat and not one from which he would easily recover. Her heart lightened, thinking about the pain Ian must have endured. She had been so quick to judge, and at every turn he had surprised her. Perhaps he wasn’t the Beast she accused him of being. If anything, it was she who had been acting out of anger and selfishness.

  “From what I know, they married young. Ian was away on a mission when their village was attacked. No one saw it coming.”

  “Who attacked them?”

  “They believe ‘twas the Sutherlands’ but they were never charged or convicted, as it was MacKay’s word against theirs. No’ to mention Isaac Sutherland was traveling in England at the time of the attack and made no’ mention that he’d ordered such a thing.”

  Keira tried hard to keep a straight face at the mention of Isaac Sutherland. On several occasions, her father had entertained Laird Sutherland and his men. They’d even welcomed him into their home; shared their meals with him. Keira never paid much attention to the reason, other than he was a dear friend of her father’s. She thought it best for now to keep that knowledge to herself, but for how long? If Ian knew that her clan and Sutherlands were allies, he may feel anger towards her.

  “That’s all I know. I must be heading downstairs now, my lady. I will have the lads send up the tub fer ye.”

  “Thank ye,” Keira said, her voice trailing off as the woman left the room.

  Keira sat quietly mulling over the new insight into Ian’s past. Every day since she’d left Castle Sinclair, she had been given bits and pieces of information, like pieces of a puzzle. A puzzle she was desperate to solve.

  Keira did not know how she was going to ever forgive her father for what he had done. When her father had announced his decision to leave the Catholic Church, she had not fully understood the new religion her father was pursuing, nor his reasons for leaving the Church. But perhaps his sins were so great that he would have shamed the Church as well as his family, and hoped to find redemption elsewhere. As a child, she had always looked up to him, but she did not think she could ever look at him the same again.

  Chapter 17

  Ian tapped on the chamber door, turned the handle and entered. He found Keira sitting on a chair near the fire, with a leather-bound book in her hands. The soft, orange glow of the flames created an inviting and calming ambiance and the earthy scent of burning pine filled the air.

  His attention was drawn to Keira, who looked at him with an earnest expression. Shadows of light seemed to dance around her, creating a halo of light, as if she were an angel. By God, she was beautiful. He had thought her bonny before, but in this lighting she looked heavenly.

  There was something about the way she looked at him that made it hard for him to resist her. As her soft smile greeted him, his eyes fell to her lips; soft, delicious morsels. Desire surged through him as he wished to taste those lips. With each breath, his pulse quickened. He wasn’t sure if it was the drink that had caused his senses to go wild or if it was the tantalizing vixen who stared back at him with equal yearning. He could almost see it in her eyes as well.

  The tips of his fingers started to tingle with the need to touch her, to feel her soft skin under his large rough hands. He would take pleasure in showing her all of the ways a man could please a woman, until her body could no longer bear it. He wanted to make her ache for him as he ached for her, with chest-tightening, heart-pounding passion. He would make her his in every way. Ian knew that if he did not distract himself from having these thoughts now, he would not be able to control his actions. He walked confidently to a chair near the fire, turning it so he faced her when he sat upon it. In order to have the satisfaction of bedding his wife, he knew he first had to woo her.

  ~*~

  Keira watched as Ian walked over to the chair and sat down, facing her. He was a hard man to read, for his facial expressions gave nothing away and his mood could change as fast as the wind. He could be kind one moment and belligerent the next. But the provocative look he was giving her now left her uncomfortable. Perhaps, he’d simply had too much to drink. It certainly would have not been out of the question.

  Thinking about what the maid had revealed, the knowledge of his previous marriage somehow made him seem more human than the beast she had imagined. To think that his life before had been so much different then, than it was now. That he’d had the tender love of a woman and had returned her love with equal measure. Keira felt a spark of jealousy for the poor dead woman. She had known a side of Ian Keira would never have the chance to know.

  Ian stared at her with such intensity; she worried what he could possibly be thinking. Keira shifted in her chair, hoping to divert his attention. She felt a sudden awkward tension between them just as she had that night in the garden, and was reminded once again about the heated kiss they’d shared. Was he thinking about that as well? Licking her lips, she thought to distract herself from the yearning feeling building up inside her, but words escaped her. Lucky for her, Ian broke the silence.

  “Tomorrow we are to leave for Inverness for the trials. As yer husband I will be permitted to speak on yer behalf. Ye will no’ have to face yer father or the King,” he said in a low husky tone.

  “But I wish to see my father! I must! I have to know if everything I believe to be true has been nothing but a puddle of lies.”

  “I dinna know if ye will be able to see him. But I promise, if there is a way, I will make sure of it,” he vowed.

  “Thank ye.”

  Up to this point, Ian had promised her many things. But what promises did he expect from her in return?

  Moving his chair closer toward Keira, Ian leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees.

  “Keira, I know this situation may no’ be ideal but I promise I will protect ye wit’ my life.”

  “I dinna need any more promises or protection. What I need are answers!”

  Ian frowned.

  “And we will get them, together.”

  Keira sat back on her chair and studied him. Why was he here? Why was he helping her? It made no sense unless there was a reason of which she was unaware. She had to know.

  “Why did ye marry me? Surely, ye must have sacrificed something.”

  “Truth be told, ye have grown on me.”

  Keira smiled and shook her head in response. It was clear this man went looking for trouble as she was known to be quite a headstrong lass. Biting her lower lip, she thought to ask him of his first wife but was afraid to open old wounds. She thought for now it was best to wait.

  “I like seeing ye smile. Ye are verra beautiful,” he said.

  Keira thought her cheeks must be glowing red as they started to tingle from his compliment. With her hand, she covered her face in her embarrassment. Other than her father, no man had ever given her such bold compliments.

  Ian stood, walked toward her, and held out his hand.

  “Do ye trust me?” he asked.

  Keira hesitated but placed her hand in his. Pulling her out of the chair, he stood before her. Standing this close, she felt the warmth radiating off his skin, i
ncreasing the temperature around her. As Ian released her hand, her skin ached for his touch. What was he doing to her? She should not want his touch but every nerve in her body was betraying her, as she quivered.

  He rubbed his fingers down her cheek, across her lips then stopped just under her chin. Lifting her head so their eyes were aligned, he spoke softly.

  “Dinna cover yer smile Lass. ‘Tis such a beautiful smile, it would be a shame to hide it. It pleases me to see it.”

  His expression grew grim.

  “Tomorrow morning the priest will come and demand to see proof that we have consummated this marriage. On that, he will no’ compromise. But I want a willing wife. I will no’ force myself on ye and I will no’ touch ye unless ye ask.”

  Keira stared up at him in horror but was taken aback by the tenderness in his eyes. She knew there was truth behind what he said, but if the priest required proof, how was he to provide it? Bedding was certainly not in the contract, at least not as she understood things. This marriage was to be in name only, but she had never taken into account the priest’s demands. And if she were to bed Ian she would not be able to get the marriage annulled. Could she lie to a priest? Could Ian? They both would certainly go to hell for it.

  There was also the matter, of course, of Ian wanting a willing bride. Willing was a far stretch from the truth, though she couldn’t help but enjoy his kisses no matter how much she tried to resist.

  “How do ye plan to convince the priest that we are married in truth?”

  “Dinna worry lass. I will come up wit’ something. Ye have nothing to fear. I give ye my word.”

  Bothered, Keira turned her head to look away but Ian stopped her by cupping her cheek in his hand and gently brought her face back around to face him. His hand lingered there for a moment until his fingers grazed down her cheek to the base of her neck. The light touch sent shivers down her spine and she shuddered. Stopping just above her shoulder, he moved his hand from her neck to stroke down the length of her arm until their fingers met. Raising her hand to his lips, he lightly kissed each knuckle. Turning her hand over, he circled his thumb along her palm and kissed the inside of her wrist.

  Keira swallowed hard and felt an intense heat rising within her. Ian must have felt it too. Forcefully, he pulled her into his embrace until their bodies were pressed together. Lowering his head until his lips hovered over hers; breathing her in. Keira’s body relaxed against him. Though she wanted to resist, and fight this burning desire inside of her, her body took on a mind of its own.

  “I will no’ kiss ye unless ye ask,” he said as his lips teasingly grazed against hers.

  Why must he torture me so?

  “I want ye Keira,” he growled.

  Kissing the side of her mouth, his lips trailed down her neck. The sensation made her knees go weak as tantalizing shivers pulsated inside her. Forcing herself to breath, she felt a sense of losing herself in his arms. She felt overwhelmed and a part of her was desperate to let go and give into this urge.

  God bless it!

  “Kiss me,” she panted, barely muttering the words.

  Ian placed several more kisses along her neck until he righted himself. Cupping her face in his hands, his lips crashed onto hers like a tidal wave crashing along the shore.

  His lips felt remarkably warm, and she felt as if she was scorched by the sun. His hands wrapped around her back, gliding down to her waist, then up to the back of her head, caressing her and pulling her into him as if he meant to swallow her whole.

  This kiss was the most intense, erotic sensation she had ever felt. It felt devilishly sinful but wonderful at the same time.

  Ian pressed his tongue on her lips, encouraging her to open. When she eagerly complied, Ian slipped his tongue inside her mouth. She felt breathless as his tongue massaged hers.

  As he gently released her, she was slowly brought back to the present. Taking in a breath of air, she was lightheaded and her limbs felt weightless. Using Ian for support, she cupped his forearm. It felt impressively hard underneath her fingertips, like he was built of stone. She looked to him in bewilderment and though at times he intimidated the hell out of her, he had a tendency to make her feel awestruck by just looking at her. Ian looked at her with the same stricken expression. She smiled knowing that her kiss had affected him as well.

  Ian grunted and placed a kiss to her forehead.

  “Ye should get some rest. We leave early in the morning,” he said pulling away and gliding toward the bed.

  Keira stood speechless and confused. Sitting down on the bed, Ian began kicking off his boots and pulling the covers down from the top of the bed. His reaction made her feel shameful. Had she done something wrong? Did he no longer want her? He sure tried to make an attempt to seduce her, so why did he stop?

  “Are ye no’ going to sleep?” he asked, looking puzzled.

  “But I thought…I mean, I assumed,” she tried to answer, fumbling her words.

  “I told ye lass. I will no’ touch ye unless ye ask. Now come to bed,” he ordered.

  Ian turned away from her and slipped his shirt off over his head. Keira stood wide-eyed at his bronze skin, noticing the multiple scars that ran along his back. Scars only a good thrashing would leave behind. Her chest tightened at the sight of them. They looked to have been deep wounds and no doubt were quite painful at one time.

  There was so much about her husband that she didn’t know. Other than the few tidbits she’d learned, she did not have enough knowledge of him to really understand him or his motives. Perhaps tomorrow she could change that.

  Ian laid down on the bed, his back to her. She was grateful the bed was so large. In normal circumstances, she would have protested sleeping on the same bed as he, but as her husband, she knew he would not allow her to sleep on the floor, and she didn’t dare ask him to do so. She trusted he would keep his word, and thus far he had not disappointed her.

  Keira unlaced her gown until she was left wearing nothing but the shift underneath. It would have to do. Lying down on the bed, she lifted the covers over her and scooted herself as far to the edge of the bed as possible without falling off. Snuggling with her pillow, she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.

  Chapter 18

  Ian woke from a pleasant sleep. The smell of lavender surrounded him like a spring day. He felt warm and comfortable in his spot upon the bed and it was no wonder why. Opening his eyes, he smiled down at the lass whose head rested on his chest with her hand upon his stomach. He stilled his movements and steadied his breath, careful not to wake the sleeping beauty in his arms.

  Her hair lay sprawled out across his shoulder and down the length of his arm. It was tempting to run his fingers through her long, soft locks. Had he not needed to rise, he would have stayed in bed holding her in his arms all day.

  A loud pounding sounded at the door. Keira woke, sitting up faster than a spooked horse. Her wide, frightening eyes scanned over him when she realized the compromising position she had been in. Ian grinned in satisfaction.

  The pounding at the door grew louder. Ian shuffled his feet from under the covers and stood from the bed. Making his way to the door, he opened it, and Leland stood in the door way, on his face a look of warning.

  “Ian, I wanted to warn ye. The priest is on his way down to the village.”

  “Alright. Thank ye. We will be down in a moment,” Ian said as he shut the door, turning his attention back to his horrified looking wife.

  “Tis time to wake up. The priest is on his way here.”

  “What are we going to do without proof to give him?” she nervously asked, slipping off the bed holding the covers tightly around her chilled body.

  If the lass’s only concern was the priest and not the fact that she found herself lying in his arms, today was going to be a good day!

  Ian studied the bedsheet for a moment before walking over to his belt lying on the floor. Removing his sgian dubh from its sheath, he pressed the blade against his thumb until it pierce
d his skin. Squeezing the tip of his finger allowed the blood to flow freely. Walking to the edge of the bed, he leaned over and smeared his thumb across the middle of the bedsheet. It wasn’t as convincing as it would have if the lass had been a bleeder, but it would have to do.

  Ian pulled the bedsheet from the bed and rolled it up in his arms.

  “Get dressed and meet me down stairs. Dinna take too long,” he advised.

  Ian left the room just as the priest was heading up the stairs.

  “Good morning MacKay. I trust ye slept well,” the priest said.

  “I am no’ interested in yer pleasantries, father. Here is yer proof that Lady Keira is truly my wife in fact. Now take it and leave,” Ian demanded.

  The priest cast a slight snarl but did as he was told. Ian would not show respect to a man who had treated Keira so poorly. Had he not been a man of the cloth, he would have ripped the mon’s tongue straight out of his mouth and forced him to eat it for the blasphemies he spoke of Keira.

  Below stairs he found Leland and Rylan finishing up their morning meal.

  “I see ye survived the night,” Rylan said with one brow raised.

  “Was the lass’s honey sweet or did she sting ye like a bee?” Leland said as he burst into laughter.

  Ian smacked the back of Leland’s head as he had when they were young.

  “That lass mind ye is my wife, and if either of ye say another word, it’ll be the two of ye whose heads I’ll be knocking around,” he warned.

  ~*~

  Keira rushed getting ready as Ian had requested. Slipping into her gown, making haste braiding her hair, and patting her face down with a cloth dipped in a small basin of cold water left out overnight.

  She followed the motions of her regular morning routine, but her head was completely in the clouds. How had she ended up lying in Ian’s arms? Just the memory of his grin when she woke was enough to humiliate her. She was grateful that he did not mention it and that Leland had come when he had. How long had she been like that? Being a heavy sleeper, she imagined that she could have snuggled up against him in the middle of the night. He would have been all too pleased and eager for the chance to touch her. Making a mental note, she would remember to place a pillow between them the next time she was forced to sleep next to him.