Shalia's Diary Omnibus

by Tracy St. John

  When he pulled free, I was more than ready for him to strip and get to business by mounting me. However, that teasing Imdiko was in no hurry to claim what I was more than happy to grant. No, instead he explored me all over again, but this time with his mouth. If there was a square inch of my body Weln didn’t taste, I’ll fuck a Tragoom. He seemed determined to have every bit of me and would not be rushed through it.

  When his mouth latched onto my pussy, I cried. I’m not sure why. Was it to relieve the stress of the past few days? Ha, ha, more like the last few months. I lay there, sobbing my heart out while Weln’s lips and tongue tasted every bit of my sex. He sucked on my clit, lapped all the flowing juices, and shoved deep into my core. My moans of pleasure and whimpers of whatever sadness had seized me encouraged him.

  He kept at me until my pussy seized, choking my bawling off. I came hard, my fists clutched in his hair, my feet kicking in the air over his shoulders. Only after the last tremor had passed and my cries ceased did he rise and take his clothes off.

  Oh, what a beauty Weln is. I could barely breathe, looking at him. So tall. So strong. That boy is a dark Adonis with his sculpted chest, narrow waist, and granite thighs. He is too stunning for mere mortals His cocks were swollen thick, shining with natural lubrication. Despite still trembling from orgasm, I couldn’t help but slide my legs wide apart, begging him to fill me.

  He smiled his sweet Weln smile and crawled on top. His purple eyes held my gaze as he lowered his hips to mine. Beyond words, I mewled a soft plea as the tips of his cocks found my ass and pussy. He slid into me, letting me feel every hot inch of his sexes.

  When we were joined, Weln lowered down, covering me with himself. My legs folded over his ass, gripping tight to press him as far in as he would go. He kissed me, savoring me as a connoisseur might.

  Weln’s lovemaking was as unhurried as the foreplay had been. I lost all track of time as he slid back and forth inside me, loving me as if we had forever to spend in each other’s arms. I am positive that no man has ever been so meticulous in his taking of a woman. My insides felt as if they glowed and pulsed as he painstakingly returned me to full arousal.

  “Come for me, Shalia,” he whispered, staring into my eyes. I was gasping as I writhed beneath him, under his thrall. He kept encouraging me. “Come for me, my beauty.”

  Under that quiet, constant encouragement, I obeyed. My pussy clenched in a lengthy, muscular spasm that I would swear went on for several minutes. Then there was that gorgeous white-blast brightness clutching me deep inside before erupting to spew molten trails throughout my body. I climaxed, aware Weln was watching all the while.

  Only after I quieted again, weeping with the last tremors of elation, did my lover release his pleasure. He groaned from deep within his chest. The telltale pulse of his cock released warmth into me, filling me up. He trembled against me as he spent, his breath loud in my ear. Then Weln kissed me for a long, long while, as if to thank me.

  All I can say is, the gratitude was mutual.

  October 14

  It’s been a few days. Now that things are settling down again, I’ll write about all that’s happened.

  I’ve waited to find out if Esak would regain consciousness first. The very first night he was on guard at a service entrance to the Academy–where vendors used to bring in supplies–about twenty Earthers attacked from the outside. The bastards had old-style hand grenades. Where they found them, I can’t imagine. While half the attackers shot with blasters, the other half threw these grenades at the guards. Only six exploded, but six were more than enough. Four Nobeks were killed. Esak and two others were badly injured.

  My poor Esak. They had to shave his head to treat the skull fractures he received from the attack. He’s bald now with a bunch of scars. But he’s alive. Thank God he’s alive.

  It’s taken this long for him to wake up, which concerned the doctors. Dusa has damned near paced a rut in the floor of Esak’s treatment room. Weln has been at his side, talking, reading to him, and keeping Dusa sane. I’ve bounced between Mom and Esak’s rooms, keeping an eye on them both. I’ve been doing lots of praying. For once, my prayers have been answered.

  We did receive good news on Esak. There’s no sign of brain injury. He’s answering questions, acting alert, in possession of all his marbles. All the signs say he’ll be all right. Let’s hear it for those tough Kalquorians. The crazy Nobek even insisted Dusa take photos of his healing scalp, so he can show off evidence of his scars once his hair grows out. He’s taking this whole ‘marks of honor’ business pretty seriously, but I’ve been informed that’s normal for his breed. He’s taken to repeating the phrase Weln got from me: What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. It’s become his motto. I’m glad he went back to sleep, because I swear if I hear him say those words once more, I’ll kill him myself. He scared me. He scared us all.

  Not to make light of Mom’s condition. She continues to do better, growing stronger every day. She’s gaining some serious squeezing power in her hands. I asked her if she was planning to break mine in her grip. She whispered in a slurring voice, “Want to knit, Shalia.” I told her, “I don’t think that will be a problem. The way your recovery is going, you’ll be giving Santa a new cap, scarf, and gloves when he shows up Christmas Eve.”

  Then again, we won’t be on Earth this Christmas. Wow. I never would have suspected last Christmas that it would be Earth’s last. Damn it, now I’m realizing I’ll be on my journey to Kalquor. Dusa, Esak, and Weln will still be here. Dr. Dad Nayun too. Maybe I’ll never see any of them again.

  This has been such a screwed-up week. I haven’t talked to Nang since the last attack. No surprise there. This place has become a fortress. We are as if under siege. All operations except security and basic support like Medical have been suspended. Meals are delivered to dorms and here in Medical rather than having a bunch of people gather in one place, making them susceptible to attack.

  Life has gone crazy. Again. At least those most important to me are here. I’m taking whatever good I can find in this situation.

  October 15

  Esak is growing stronger and stronger. He’s already asking when he can get out of bed, making enough of a pest of himself that we’re threatening to put him in a stasis field. Nobeks don’t stay put very well, even when they’ve nearly had their heads blown off their shoulders. At least with operations suspended, Dusa and Weln can stick close to him and make him behave.

  I continue the back-and-forth between rooms. It’s giving me plenty of exercise since Esak and Mom are at opposite ends of the building. Dr. Dad says he’s finding me some Kalquorian-grade running slippers since I’ll soon wear out my sneakers.

  I should be grateful that life is improving for those I care about. I’m trying to be happy about that, I really am. Yet I feel sick inside. I don’t show it to anybody, but I am in a serious funk. I am constantly sad. I’m not sure if it’s because of Mom getting sick and then Esak’s close call. Maybe it’s the continued threat of attack. Or perhaps it’s the realization that I will soon be leaving Earth forever, that my planet is truly dead and I’ll never see it again. Not to mention maybe I’ll never be with my favorite Kalquorians either. It’s probably a little of everything.

  I try to camp out overnight in Mom’s room when Dad isn’t looking. I can’t stand to sleep in my dorm room all by myself. When I try to rest in my quarters, I end up crying myself to sleep. It’s harder and harder to climb out of bed in the morning. I never knew how much effort putting on clothes and brushing my hair could be until recently. Occasionally during the day, I go into the bathroom where no one can watch me. I hide there and cry. Every tiny setback is overwhelming me. Even Mom and Esak’s improvements, as wonderful as they are, can’t snap me out of this.

  I don’t want Earth to die. I don’t want to leave Dusa, Esak, and Weln behind. Sometimes I think I want to find a way for them to clan me so I’ll have that tiny bit of stability. I wish I had longer with them, enough so I could decide if I
could spend the rest of my life with them. But to chain myself to those three, no matter how wonderful they are, just because I feel alone and scared? That’s stupid, and I know it. On the other hand, I also realize that once I leave Earth it will be an immense stretch, if ever, before I’ll see them again.

  Great, I’m going to cry some more. Nothing is certain. I don’t believe I can take not knowing what to expect. If I don’t find something I can depend on, something solid and real, some kind of light at the end of the tunnel, I might go insane.

  October 16

  Dr. Dad caught me crying yesterday. I was sitting with Mom, who had fallen asleep. As I was trying to find the motivation to stand up and walk the distance to Esak’s room, I had a weak spell. I huddled on my chair, tears pouring down my cheeks as a wash of pure sadness walloped me.

  I didn’t realize Nayun had walked into the room until I heard his concerned voice speak my name from behind me. “Shalia?”

  There was no hiding my pain from my Kalquorian dad. I couldn’t find the strength to pretend I’d been crying because I was so relieved Mom and Esak would be okay. I sat there and shook.

  He picked me up and cradled me like a baby in his arms. Then he carried me to his office. He sat on the edge of his desk and rocked me. Dad didn’t say a word. He held me and let me cry until I recovered enough control to stop.

  He said, “It’s been a rough time, hasn’t it?”

  That got me going again. Dad took his com out of his belt pouch and spoke into it. A few moments later, an orderly came in with an injector. I didn’t have the will to resist as he pressed it to my neck. Then he left me and Dad alone again.

  Seconds later, the depression lifted. It was the first sunlight after a long, dark night. I was calm. Good, in fact. I stopped crying.

  “Better?” Dad asked me.

  “Tons,” I told him. My head rested against the hollow of his shoulder. It was the safest I’d felt in forever. I said, “Hide the blasters from me. I might go on a crime spree, stealing your supply of that stuff.”

  He chuckled and hugged me tight. “Let’s talk about what’s making you hurt. All of it.”

  I’m not sure if whatever they’d given me loosens tongues as well as makes the pain disappear, but I spilled my guts. I talked and talked, telling Dad all my fears about leaving, how one second I wanted to join Dusa’s clan so I wouldn’t lose them, and the next second I was terrified it would be a huge mistake. I talked about all my terrors for Mom. About how hard it will be to leave Earth, though the planet is dying. About having no idea about what the future held. I fretted and whined nonstop for ages.

  Dad let me talk myself out, until I’d covered and re-covered all the terror and pain I’d kept stored up. He never gave any sign of judgment, no impatient interrupting, and no condescending and meaningless words of comfortless reassurance. He listened, nodded, and held me the way I’d once wished my own parents would. I ran my mouth about every subject that occurred to me. I even confessed that I thought of him as my father; that I called him Dr. Dad in my head. He smiled at me and blinked hard, as if fighting his own tears.

  “I would be honored to have you for a daughter, Shalia,” he said. His palm pressed against my cheek, and I leaned into its warmth.

  At last, I ran out of words. For several minutes after that Dad sat quietly. He held me and let me settle into the silence and comfort of being held and not being so unhappy.

  When he did speak, his voice was quiet. “I can only imagine how adrift you feel. Your old life is gone, your present life is in shambles, and you have no way of knowing it will get better. Those you share strength with are about to be left behind. Of course you’re miserable, Shalia. Anyone in your place would feel the same.”

  “I feel pretty grand right now,” I told him. “Your drugs are awesome.”

  He laughed at my silliness. “I’m going to have you continue to take an antidepressant for a little while. At least until you gain some measure of stability again. Meanwhile I want to give you something to think about, daughter of my heart.”

  “I’m listening.”

  “You are in the care of the Kalquorian Empire now. You may feel like you’re on the edge of a cliff, ready to fall at any moment. Though you can’t tell, there is a safety net beneath you. As long as you remain with us, you will be kept as protected as we are able. Your mother will receive the care she needs. You have all the trip to Kalquor plus the two years you remain in the lottery to decide on your future. During that period, we will take care of you; we will supply your shelter, food, all the basic needs. Though you’ll be leaving behind those of us involved in the rescue effort, you can contact me whenever you wish. I’m sure Dusa and his clan will tell you the same goes for them.”

  I hadn’t thought of that. I would be able to com the friends I’d made here. Though we’d have so much distance apart, I could still see and hear them. That knowledge helped tremendously.

  My far-off future remains uncertain. I have a while to figure it out before it arrives. Okay, I could handle that. Though Earth was a corpse waiting to happen, I could cope with the grief tied to that, as long as the rest of life wasn’t so horrendous.

  “You should have been a dad for real,” I said to Nayun. “You’re good at it.”

  He laughed. “Thank you. Are you ready to face the world again?”

  I slid off his lap. “Shalia Monroe, reporting for duty, sir. Ready to go back into battle.” A wave of sentimentality broke over me as I looked at Dad. He smiled at me with pride I doubt I deserved. I flung my arms around his neck. “Thank you, Dad,” I whispered in his ear.

  “You’re welcome, my daughter. Promise me you won’t let it get so bad next time. Talk to me before you start to fall apart again.”

  “I will.”

  I kind of hate depending on the anti-depressant he put me on, but I don’t want to be immobilized as I had been. I’m being a good girl and taking it as ordered. It’s keeping me strong for Mom and Esak and everybody else who needs me, so I’m willing to do what I have to. Dad says we’ll revisit my emotional state in a week with a counselor and see if I can handle life again without the chemical help.

  I think of all the Kalquorians I’ve met, Nayun is the most important. Even more than Dusa and Esak. He really is the father I was meant to have.

  October 19

  It’s been pretty quiet lately, so I wasn’t surprised that Nang commed me yesterday. He asked me to meet with him concerning his presentation. With Mom and Esak both doing well, I decided to make the meeting. Since I didn’t have Nang-repellent, I was determined to keep as much physical distance between us as possible while we were together. What’s that quote about the road to hell being paved with good intentions? Hear me sigh.

  When I showed up, I was surprised to find Matt King in the office with the commander. Not expecting Nang to have a visitor, I had breezed into his office like I owned it. When I realized someone sat across from Nang at his desk, I stammered my apologies and tried to back out.

  “No, come in Shalia,” Nang invited. “Mr. King—”

  “Matt,” the Earther spokesman insisted.

  “Yes, Matt dropped by to offer his assistance on this issue with the Earther attacks. I’d appreciate your opinion on the suggestion he gave.”

  I love it when my thoughts matter to others. Particularly when those others are men, as they were the gender that ruled pre-Armageddon Earth. Sure, it’s an ego stroke, but having been a member of the silent half for so long, it means something to me.

  “Any ideas that will stop this nightmare are worthwhile,” I agreed. “What were your thoughts?”

  Matt smiled. “From what Commander Nang has told me, the group coming against the Academy has splintered into several different pieces, making it more difficult for his men to track down.”

  I nodded. “That’s what I heard.”

  “Those smaller groups are staying on the move, deliberately leaving false trails to confuse us,” Nang said. “We have yet to catch up
to even one. I’ve put in for heat-signature devices to be installed on our shuttles, but it’s hard to acquire the equipment in a timely manner. This area is not deemed a top priority, due to the smaller population here. It could be weeks before my request is honored.”

  “Too bad,” I murmured. “That would help find survivors who need the most help too.”

  “Indeed.”

  Matt nodded his agreement. “I admit I’m no tactical expert, but the Kalquorians’ resources are being stretched thin, what with trying to defend the Academy. Attempting to catch our assailants makes it worse. I would guess the smaller groups are staying in contact with each other. I’m betting there is a single person or a small group of men leading this effort.”