In the Lap of the Gods

by Tony Criddle

  Nick had talked so much he had to clear his throat.

  “To put it all together Lil, that bullshit doesn’t seem important once you know you can deal with real danger and cope with difficult problems, and maybe even choose what to be angry about. You don’t need that immature crap to convince insecure people how tough and capable you are because somehow they can sense it anyway. And I’ve been there and done it Lil, so that sort of childish response isn’t an issue for me. I’ve earned my spurs and I know how I react and cope with dodgy things. What I’m really saying I suppose is that I know who and what I am.”

  Nick wondered about any more self-disclosure, and saw the intense dark eyes were following his every word. Stuff it. She’d been pretty frank so he’d let her have it all.

  “This started with us talking about the sex thing, which is totally different in our cultures Laleh, and I’ve got fond memories of one relationship that didn’t quite make it myself. She was a bit older than me and taught me what should be important in a relationship. We had different priorities and direction in the end, but quite honestly I’m glad it happened because it helped me to understand a lot of things. I never got anywhere close to it again, but she taught me that the past is history and can’t be changed, so it shouldn’t be a barrier to something good happening in the future. It’s having a good partnership that really matters and sex should be a means of expressing what you feel, not the end result of a relationship. Part of the enjoyment of it, not something you do to score points or to get your own way.”

  After he’d said it he realised he believed it. It wasn’t just empathy. Some of those people management lectures must have struck the bell after all.

  “I remained good friends with the two students in England until I came back to Iran. Is that what you mean?”

  “That’s exactly what I mean. I’ve been tested a few times myself Laleh, and I’ve had to cope with my share of real danger, so life isn’t a competition for me, and isn’t it better to remember people with fondness not hatred if you can. We just have to accept that if something does die it was probably going to anyway, but we’re better for it happening. Mind you, not everybody sees it that way. Things from your past or red hot jealousies can get in the way, so really good relationships are still pretty rare. It’s been said that ‘the truth will set you free’ Lil, but the gutless or under-confident often use lies to protect iffy egos rather than face up to it, so it never changes for them. Eventually, body language, or poor memory catches them out though, and there isn’t any way back for them after.”

  She reached to flick a wayward lock from his forehead. It prompted him to keep going. He knew he needed to tie it all together.

  “From what I’ve been told there’s a so called ‘honeymoon period’ that lasts about eighteen months, and if there isn’t anything there when the first flush off passion wears off, then it’s doomsville. There’s got to be something more than just passion between people if it’s going to last, particularly when things like a decent home and car, or warm clothes and food for the baby become an issue. But rape is totally different again. It’s a power and humiliation thing, mostly done by males to make a point, and maybe to get rid of tension or fears they can’t cope with in other ways. Their weapons and the power become an extension of their dicks. They mean to intimidate people, to flaunt what they don’t really have without it.”

  He had to be careful now.

  “You would know it’s even worse in Islamic countries Lil, because rape is used specifically to punish you or your family. It’s meant to humiliate and destroy your whole way of life for ever, but really it’s still about power and dominance. What happened earlier was a normal part of growing up, and the recent rape was not your fault. It doesn’t make you a lesser person, it happened purely because you were there; it wasn’t about who you are it was about what you represent. It’s mostly a compulsion Laleh, but also a conscious choice.”

  She was looking at him intently now. “You’ve never said anything like this before though Nick. You’re much deeper than I realised. I’m the one who’s got a Masters in this sort of thinking but you seem to see much more than I do.”

  “The navy’s got a divisional system Lil, and officers are taught to look after their sailors. I’ve read a fair bit, sat through a few lectures on this sort of stuff, and gone through some of it when my sailors had personal problems. That bloody Scotsman knew a lot of this was inside me as well because there hasn’t been much else to talk about out here.”

  “You’ve been hurt as well though. I think I can see that now.”

  “My childhood wasn’t all that great Laleh, but it did teach me what partnerships should be, because I sure as hell know what they shouldn’t be. Men and women talk a similar language but they interpret the words differently, and I was afraid it would be almost impossible to meet someone who understood that.” He was looking at the ground when he said that.

  “Jock’s been goading me ever since you came along because he thinks we would be right for each other. He’s convinced we can make it, but certainly knew you’d need to heal first, but now I think he knew I would as well. He’s been deliberately dragging all this stuff to the surface to make me re-examine it, and it helps that we’re with each other 24/7.” Nick looked at her again.

  “Anyway you know all this really Lil, so we don’t need to keep examining it. Your experiences just buried it for a while.”

  “I’ve always thought you were just being kind though and you’d drop the act when I’d mostly gotten over it. I needed you to be okay about touching me though, and me to be happy about it too. It’s probably why I’m a bit physical, because it would never happen in Iran now. I didn’t think you really meant it that’s all.”

  “It’s not quite the time for us yet Laleh but I’m sure looking forward to when it is.” Nick grinned wickedly. “I guarantee it won’t be a brief exchange when the time does come either.”

  Chapter Thirty-One

  There was something different about them when they got back. Both Amini and Sinclair could sense it. He looked taller, she more self-assured, and they were still holding hands. Laleh peeled off to the kitchen and he to his bedroom for a local area map.

  Laleh made coffee for them both, not asking how he wanted it let alone if he wanted one at all, while Nick took the charts to the settee. She joined him there with the mugs but this time sat at the opposite end. Laleh removed her moccasins, swung her skirt-clad, flawless legs onto his lap, and hitched the long dress higher. The pilot continued to study his map while at the same time kneading a shapely bare foot. She closed her eyes with a contented sigh.

  Amini looked at the pair with fresh eyes. It had only been a few intense months but they had been thrown together continually. Obviously they already knew each other’s preferences, their likes and dislikes. He recognised instantly that he was no longer her first priority and sighed contently. He would always be her big brother, but she now had another strong man she cared for, someone else who would fight savagely for her and probably even die for her if he had to. There was a lot still unresolved in Amini’s life and the thought was gratifying. He felt Jock looking at him and shifted his gaze. They both grinned.

  “Right people, I’ll toss around a few thoughts and you can let me have your opinions as we go.”

  Laleh opened her eyes at the sound of his voice, but closed them again when he swapped one foot for the other.

  “Okay. There’s no defined threat yet and there may never be one, but there are a few things we can do to hedge our bets. What I mean is we prepare but we don’t do anything risky unless we have to.” The two males nodded.

  “I was followed after I dropped off the reports the other day as I told you, but nothing else happened. Now I think it was a spur of the moment thing, more about the company ops out here, so we’ll try to lower the odds a bit.” He paused while he sipped from his mug.

  “Jock, I want you to take the vehicle into Qom and get that black film put on the windows.
It’ll be summer before long, so it’ll seem the thing to do, but you can’t see inside when that’s in place. And after that Farhad and Laleh won’t travel together unless it can’t be helped.” Sinclair nodded.

  “Secondly, Qom serves three railway lines, and that may be an option if we have to do a bunk. We need an updated timetable and information about checks or searches along the way.”

  “My boys would be ideal for some of that Nick. They came here by train and went back to Pakistan on leave that way too. It would be perfectly natural for them to make enquiries.”

  “Fine, but we’ll decide on routes later. We could always by-pass a few stations by using a chopper if we have to. You get that one rolling Jock.” The nod was enough.

  “Next, we fly some surveys starting the day after tomorrow and put in a few reports to avert any suspicion. We’ll throw in a few positive sightings, but high in the hills, somewhere inaccessible. It’ll keep them interested.”

  “Can I help with that one?”

  Laleh got an indulgent smile and the others grinned to. “I thought more flying might appeal to you. Is everybody happy so far?” He barely waited for the nods.

  “Okay. Now this one’s the controversial one. We’ll need another trip to Tehran in the next couple of weeks.”

  “Is that bit necessary laddie?” The Scot looked perplexed, the others said nothing.

  “Unfortunately it is. First we need the other Cherokee for everyday stuff, but maybe for something else in the future as well. Webster would have left it at the Canadian Embassy and a top up from the Brit Embassy bond is a good excuse to get it, but really I’m going to try for some sort of official travel docs for Fred and Lily.”

  “But the Brit Embassy isn’t going to risk getting involved like that, is it?”

  “Probably not Fred, but they might have thought of something else. Right now anything’s worth a go.”

  “Would you contact Abdul while you’re up there Nickie?”

  “I’ve thought about that one Lil, and I think it’s worth the risk. Farhad had no joy with any of his numbers but Abdul’s pretty high profile and may have something worthwhile by now. I’ll get Gerry to call the university on a sterile phone and arrange for Abdul and Minu to be at home at the right time. It won’t be for long.”

  “God, I’d love to see them one more time.” There was something wistful about that.

  “You’re bound to feel that way Laleh, but think about it, because it would be incredibly selfish. You’d spend over six hours in a chador, make the embassy thing more risky and could compromise Abdul and Minu, all for a couple of hugs.”

  “I know you’re right Nick, it’s a bit hard that’s all.” Nick took her hand and squeezed. It refocused her.

  “Hang on, I’ve got an idea.” He turned to Sinclair. “You’ve still got that Polaroid camera Jock?”

  “Bloody expensive, even in duty free, but it takes good pictures.”

  “Then that’s the answer Laleh. Jock got it because we couldn’t get other film developed around here all that easily. You can take several photos of what you want to and write Minu a letter. Farhad can pass them on when we get up there.” She smiled.

  They tossed around a few more ideas, refined a few more facts, then ate and went to bed. The morrow would be a very early start.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Nick and Amini got the barbecue flashed up at six to heat the mesh. Half an hour later Nick collected the seasoned ibex carcass, skewered it, and started it roasting. After that it would get turned by anyone who passed it. He had a final look-around and spotted Laleh leaning casually against the door jamb watching them.

  She was still wrapped in her purple chiffon night shirt, and in a very feminine gesture half raised an arm and wriggled her fingers. He smiled.

  “Do you guys want coffee?”

  Nick looked at Amini, who nodded. “Love one. Be there in five minutes.”

  Full light hadn’t yet fully scattered the night’s darker shadows, but Nick could already hear disjointed, shrill music drifting on the morning zephyr. It didn’t sound much like a tune, more like instruments warming up. Or maybe cats fighting. When Nick and Amini got back inside there were two mugs on the table and Laleh was fetching a third. She looked over her shoulder.

  “Yours is the one nearest the door Nick.”

  He and Amini sat across from each other at the table, but when Laleh returned she ignored a chair and sat on one of Nick’s knees. His left hand automatically went around her waist, and he found there was nothing under the crisp, dark rayon but flesh. It was innocent enough, not meant to be provocative at all, but Nick was acutely aware of dark nipples, barely discernable even up close, pushing delicately against the patterned chiffon. They were at lip level, and that wasn’t helping all that much either. She was holding her mug with both hands, still half asleep, not yet up to conversation.

  Amini was male and smiled to himself. He knew why Nick Evans was looking uncomfortable and expected the long, muffled Jesus when the girl dreamily touched Nick’s face on her way to her bedroom.

  “Got a bit of a stomach cramp there Nick?” A grinning Amini was getting less reserved by the day.

  “She’s still got a few yards to go yet Fred, but if your sister keeps doing that sort of thing without thinking about it I’m going to have a bloody accident.”

  “She feels safe with you mate. Don’t forget she lived in the UK for several years. She saw old couples walking down the street hand in hand, people kissing and hugging in the open, and youngsters crashed out on blankets in the parks and on the beaches. That sort of thing is totally different to anything she would ever see here. She’s obviously got it worked out Nick. She feels that partnerships should be like that. I can have a quiet word with her if you like; she’s still pretty naïve really.”

  Nick’s friend got a big grin. “I don’t mean that you arsehole, and you know it. I’ll put up with it but don’t smirk when you know what’s happening.”

  Anything else was buried when Sarah and Sinclair came through the door laughing about something.

  Sarah took charge. It was her people’s celebration and she knew the ropes. She festooned a trestle table with baskets of bread and fruit then layered the cooked vegetables on metal baking trays underneath the carcass. The ibex was already crackling by then and the vegetables would taste better with the juices dripping gently over them. She looked around critically and it seemed to be a sign.

  It wasn’t yet mid-morning when the sudden crash of cymbals and the mesmerising thump of drums joined the high, twittering squeaks of whistles.

  “We let this one go, be ready for next one Nick. That much better.”

  Nick nodded. “Is there anything else we should do?”

  “No, all done. Vegetables in drum and bread and fruit covered. Mohammed bring over jugs soon so we enjoy rest of day. You got plastic cup things somewhere?”

  “I know where they are. I’ll have a caffeine hit then dig them out. Do you guys want a coffee?” Sarah and Amini declined, Sinclair nodded. Nick moved inside.

  Laleh was exiting her bedroom as Nick pushed through the door. He stopped mesmerised. She was dressed festively in a skirt that flowed from waist to calf in broad pastel streaks, topped by a loose patterned blouse. The blouse was more subdued than the skirt, in a more subtle shade of purple. And although she wore little makeup, what she did enhanced every significant feature. Nick’s stomach knotted. He didn’t realise he’d frozen.

  “Ta dah. You like?” The girl whirled, but Nick stayed speechless as the others crowded in behind him. Sinclair was the nearest and whispered in his ear.

  “You ever let that get away laddie and you need your fucking head examined.”

  Startled, Nick looked at him then back at her. “Laleh, you look absolutely stunning. I don’t know what to say.” But then something kicked in and he approached her. “May I have the pleasure of the next dance ma’am?”

  He guided her around the room for several animate
d, uninhibited whirls, and she was giggling as he guided her to the sofa. He had known how to react after all. That’s exactly what she needed. Nick Evans totally forgot what he was meant to be doing. Jock got in the last word.

  “That’s okay laddie, carry on gawping. I’ll fix the coffee.”

  The festive hype grew on them like an approaching freight train. These things can be more about mood than alcohol, and even before the kettle had boiled Mohammed turned up with two large stoneware jars. It was Sarah who suggested a shot with their brew. The others already knew the damage that would inflict but Sinclair saved their livers.

  “I’ve already put a wee dram in these Sarah. It’ll be a long day so that’s enough for now. What about you?”