The Amish Secret Wish

by Laura V. Hilton

  Not another headache…

  Then the clouds burst. From the window behind the recliner Hallie sat in, Kiah watched the rain come down in sheets.

  And Kiah’s stomach dropped. He’d really hoped to get this settled tonight. “Break up” with Anna and ask Hallie to consider letting him court her…

  Were his plans about to do the same? Dissipate like so many droplets of water?

  * * *

  Hallie didn’t want to get involved in Kiah’s quest to break up with Anna. She wanted to discuss his pending marriage to Molly.

  Even though he’d mentioned her in person, she mentally reviewed his letters for references to the other woman. The letters were all bundled together in a large white plastic mailing envelope and tucked away in her hope chest underneath the shades of violet Lone Star quilt she’d made for her eventual marriage bed back when she still had dreams.

  Dreams Toby had destroyed when he announced he wouldn’t be caught in a purple bed. His favorite color was tan. And even though she hated shades of brown, she’d made a replacement quilt in those colors just to make Toby happy.

  She’d planned to sell the lovely lavender quilt, but with Toby’s death, she’d sold the tan one instead.

  But that didn’t matter. What did matter were the new dreams that had sprung to life with Kiah’s visit and the crushing despair that he might marry his ex-girlfriend Molly after all. Though she was fairly positive that he’d been adamant that he and Molly were history.

  So why…

  She’d review the letters just to confirm Kiah’s words when she could get up to her room and be alone again, but it made zero sense that his daed would be announcing Kiah’s pending wedding to Molly if they were in fact no longer a couple.

  Kiah somehow managed to scrape out the last bit of the highly questionable dill pickle ice cream, and he set the bowl down on the tray beside hers. He inhaled deeply. “You have questions and I have no answers.” His words were whispered, since both of their fathers still sat across the room drinking coffee and eating cookies. “But I will talk to Daed when I get a chance and try to get to the bottom of this.”

  He’d better, if he planned to court and marry her.

  And if she decided he was worth the risk. He was.

  Her emotions were a messy jumbled glob of disorganized confusion where Kiah Esh was concerned.

  And no matter which choice she made, she was probably going to get hurt.

  Wasn’t there a verse about guarding her heart? It probably was written as a warning to women if there was one.

  Kiah’s face was still slightly green, and his gaze was fixed on the window behind her. He was a preacher’s son; he’d know if such a verse existed. And if he didn’t, his daed would, because he was a preacher.

  She cleared her throat. Kiah’s attention snapped back to her. “Is there a Bible verse about guarding your heart?” She asked loud enough to get their fathers’ attention, just in case Kiah didn’t know.

  And maybe to earn a few positive points with his daed to counteract all the negative ones racked up against her.

  Kiah blinked at her and frowned. Then glanced at his daed.

  There was complete silence; then her daed reached for his Bible. “Proverbs, I think,” he murmured.

  Figured that her daed would know. A burst of pride shot through her. Shameful of her, but he wasn’t even a preacher.

  The two men leaned over the Bible together, skimming the pages.

  “Aha!” Kiah’s daed found it first. He jabbed the page with his thumb. “Proverbs four twenty-three says, ‘Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.’”

  Maybe not exactly what she remembered, but the first part was close enough. She didn’t have the foggiest of ideas what the second portion meant. She opened her mouth to ask, but Kiah’s focus was on the window behind her. Again.

  She tried to twist enough to see, but couldn’t. It was getting dark inside the house, though.

  He glanced at her. “The sky is getting black from the storm clouds. I was wondering about your brother, fishing. Is he near shelter?”

  “He’s at a friend’s house, fishing at their pond. He’ll be fine,” Daed answered.

  “He knows to take shelter,” Hallie added as an Englisch vehicle drove by on the road, blaring its horn.

  She looked at Daed.

  He stared back at her, his face grim.

  A terrible sense of been there, done that filled her.

  Except this time, Toby’s life wasn’t in the balance.

  But it might be an omen that she’d eventually lose Kiah, too.

  * * *

  There was a third eardrum-shattering crash of thunder. And then hail pelted the buildings. Kiah stood and moved closer to the window.

  “Is that hail?” Hallie asked, a touch of fear in her voice. She dropped the footrest on the recliner with a thud. And groaned.

  “Table tennis–ball size.” Kiah was impressed. He thought he heard the distant wail of tornado sirens but wasn’t sure. The vehicle’s horn was still blaring while getting farther away. The sky didn’t appear to have a greenish tint. Still, with what this district had been through…He opened his mouth. “Do you have a tornado shelter?”

  “Interior room,” Ted responded. “The pantry.” There was a hint of apology in his voice. “Unless you want to use the crawl space under the house. And in Hallie’s condition…”

  Kiah glanced at her, lying on the recliner, and remembered the swollen redness of her ankle from the glimpse at the springs. Jah, dragging her through the dirt in the crawl space might injure her worse.

  “But there’s not enough room for everyone in there,” Hallie said.

  Ted sighed softly and stood with a slight frown as if worried to leave her upstairs and partially vulnerable. “You and your grandparents. The rest of us can go to the crawl space.”

  “Except Mammi, Daadi, and I will need help getting down on the floor and up again.” Hallie folded back the edge of the blanket, revealing more of her lavender-dress-covered curves. His new favorite color.

  “Kiah can stay with you to assist,” Ted said.

  Ted was going to trust Kiah to stay with Hallie during the storm with only the grandparents to chaperone? It could get awkward since her mammi seemed to have matchmaking on her mind…

  Ted stood and walked to the stairs and called up for Anna and Joy. Then he went into the kitchen. “Oh, Joy, I didn’t know you were in here with the other women.”

  Joy laughed and said something Kiah didn’t catch as he scooped Hallie and her blanket into his arms and trailed after Ted into the other room. Kiah’s daed followed him.

  The daadi came out of the pantry and picked up a dining room chair, then followed Hallie’s mammi as she grabbed her wheelless walker and hobbled toward the pantry.

  Kiah stopped to wait.

  The other women headed for the outside door—presumably to the crawl space.

  Except Anna. She bounded into the kitchen and skidded to a stop as her gaze met Hallie’s. Anna glared and Hallie snuggled a little closer into Kiah’s chest.

  As much as Kiah enjoyed the feel of Hallie pressed against him, along with the spine-tingling sensations—sensations he already always felt around her—he hated to be the cause of strife between the sisters.

  Bishop Nathan had warned Kiah. But how could he have avoided it?

  Ted apparently noticed the tension in the room, because he stopped, turned, and retreated to stand next to Kiah. “Get to the crawl space, Anna.” His tone didn’t leave any room for argument.

  Without a word, Anna strode over to the hooks by the door and grabbed her black bonnet and sweater and followed the other women out the door. Kiah’s daed followed behind her.

  Ted rested his hand briefly on Kiah’s shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze and making Kiah feel as if he’d somehow managed to gain a positive opinion from Hallie’s daed. And with any luck at all, maybe he’d manage to keep it.

  Then
Ted turned and followed the others from the house, shutting the door firmly behind him. Kiah carried Hallie to the pantry door.

  While Kiah’s attention had been distracted by Anna and Ted, the daadi had arranged four dining room chairs around the small room serving as a pantry. Except, Hallie was supposed to keep her foot elevated and there wasn’t enough room to lay a pallet on the floor, unless she—and the blanket—were woven under and around the legs of chairs.

  So much for the help with the up and down from the floor. They didn’t need assistance, but Ted had still told him to stay and “assist,” so he would.

  Kiah frowned and gently placed Hallie on a chair and awkwardly draped the blanket over her. That was the best he could do, short of lifting her injured leg up and letting it recline on his lap. It would solve the problem, but he wasn’t sure about the rules in this district. He’d already managed to get them both in enough trouble without deliberately looking for more.

  The bothersome mammi cackled. “Go ahead and elevate her ankle, boy. You know you want to. I won’t tell.”

  He wouldn’t try to figure out how the mammi knew his thoughts. She probably held a forbidden advanced degree in mind reading. And the fact that she wouldn’t tell? That probably meant it was against the rules.

  Hallie’s daadi chuckled. “Now, Gloria, you shouldn’t tease the poor boy.” He glanced at Kiah. “Go ahead and elevate it. Just keep it well covered with the blanket and keep your hands off.”

  Kiah shifted his chair closer to Hallie and gently lifted her blanket-covered leg onto his lap. Judging by the pained expression that crossed her face, she got no pleasure from the movement. He found none by hurting her.

  Hallie’s mammi shifted. “She likely needs a fresh ice pack.” She reached for her walker.

  The daadi shook his head. “I’ll get it.” He looked at Hallie. “Hand me the warm one, Glory.”

  Kiah jerked.

  Hallie whimpered. Probably because he jostled her foot.

  Kiah glanced from the daadi to Hallie and back again. Then Kiah shook his head. The old man must have referred to his wife by a pet name. Gloria and Glory were similar enough to be substituted for each other. Though why would he ask Gloria to reach across him to grab Hallie’s ice pack?

  “I dropped the ice pack when Kiah picked me up,” Hallie said. Her cheeks flamed an interesting shade of pink. She also avoided Kiah’s gaze.

  Interesting. And telling.

  Very telling.

  So…Her name was Glory Henrietta. No. That still didn’t work. Glory Hallie…Glory Hal…The answer lit up like a neon light. “Glory Hallelujah. GHB.” He might’ve shouted it.

  The three others in the room blinked as if the light was blinding.

  The daadi paused half out of his chair. He gripped the cane a bit tighter—his knuckles whitened—but he very slowly continued to straighten into a stand. “Let me fetch the ice pack, boy; then you can explain yourself.”

  Hallie’s face pinkened enough to rival the imaginary neon light. No explanations were needed. Hallie really was GHB. She’d told the truth. Kiah sat there and grinned at her even though she stared at the blanket as if it were the most fascinating thing ever.

  Hallie cleared her throat. Twice. She still didn’t look at Kiah. “To change the subject…I have a question about the verse Preacher Esh read. You know. Proverbs four twenty-three, where it says, ‘Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.’ What do you think the second part of the verse means?”

  Silence.

  Her mammi blinked owlishly behind her bifocals or trifocals, whatever they were, her gaze fixed on Kiah as if he alone knew the answer.

  He was still struggling with the exciting discovery of his own…Hallie was GHB. For sure and for certain. His heart had truly known her from the beginning. To play theologian now? Impossible.

  Her daadi hobbled back into the room, cane tapping. He handed the ice pack to Kiah.

  Kiah awkwardly tried to slide the freezing bag into place without looking since Hallie’s mammi was still looking at him and her daadi was frowning and Kiah wasn’t supposed to look or touch.

  Hallie winced, leaned forward, and adjusted it herself.

  Her daadi reclaimed his seat. “I think it means that many of the issues people face are directly a result of the problems in their hearts. The commands of Gott are a gift to those who will diligently keep them alive in their hearts.”

  Hallie bit her lower lip. “Something to mull over later.”

  Her mammi shifted, then pushed her glasses up. “Or as the Englisch say, garbage in, garbage out. Or maybe you are what you eat. Or birds of a feather flock together. Or—”

  “So it doesn’t mean not to let love in?” Kiah asked, mainly to interrupt the mammi because she was on a roll. And because he was guessing at Hallie’s problem, and her fixation with this verse’s idea, while also recalling her “love hurts” and “too risky” protests last night.

  Hallie’s mammi cackled and reached to pat Kiah’s knee near Hallie’s ankle. “You’d better let love in, boy. You’re the one who’s going to marry our Hallie.”

  Hallie coughed.

  But Kiah wouldn’t object at all.

  Chapter 21

  Hallie covered her burning face in her hands while trying not to wiggle her foot that was still on Kiah’s lap. Even though the pantry door was open, the room was only dimly lit, and that was by Daadi’s flashlight, which urgently needed fresh batteries.

  Hallie was going to die. That was the plain and simple truth. Either the undiluted pain from her badly sprained ankle would kill her, or she would die from embarrassment, and maybe from acute longing mixed with a liberal helping of fear and trepidation. It was hard to say which would deliver the fatal blow.

  Sheesh, she didn’t even know which one hurt the worst. When was the last dose of pain medication she’d taken, anyway? Before everyone left for church to be sure. Maybe at the emergency room. She couldn’t remember taking any since she left the hospital. That would probably relieve the pain from all three sources. Especially since it made her drowsy and she could pretend this was all a very vivid bad dream.

  Someone down below in the crawl space pounded the floor hard. Hallie jerked, moving her foot, and bit back a moan. They apparently thought they were having too much fun in the pantry. But why would they think that? Fun? No one was laughing. No one was tap dancing with a cane, walker, or crutches…Maybe they were checking to see if they were still alive. But why?

  Mammi, who shared Joy’s exceedingly happy personality, stomped the floor with her walker in response and then started giggling so hard she caught the hiccups, which made Daadi chuckle. Kiah sat as still as a stump but grinned at the older couple as if they made his day.

  Hallie envied them. Once upon a time, she’d enjoyed being happy and carefree and she could have fun with the best of them.

  But with the loss of Toby, what might’ve been depression…Or maybe it had hit before Toby passed.

  She’d loved Toby. She had. But he’d started to get very demanding, insisting she submit to his likes and dislikes as a good Amish wife would. She also had to clear every purchase with him before she made it. So even the dishes she’d use in their eventual kitchen reflected his rather drab taste.

  She’d gotten rid of the dishes, too.

  As if there was something wrong with color! Gott Himself used colors—lots of colors—other than shades of brown.

  She glanced at the rows of home-canned food on the shelves. Yellow, orange, red, and green. That was just the vegetables.

  Kiah shifted, his hand atop the quilt sliding her throbbing ankle to a different spot on his strong leg.

  He winked at her and blew a kiss.

  That made her tingle with anticipation. She smiled.

  Toby’s kisses? They weren’t anything to whisper about with her friends. In fact, they weren’t anything exciting at all. Wet and sloppy…She could happily live without them. But her best friends, Gracie an
d Elsie, were convinced she’d grow to like them.

  She never did.

  But Kiah’s kisses…oh my word. He was a master at the fine art of kissing.

  With that in mind, why did she have to focus on Toby in the hereafter when there was a possibility of finding her happily-ever-after in the here and now with Kiah?

  Because Toby had sworn that death wouldn’t separate them? But weren’t the wedding vows “until death do us part”? She kept waiting for Gott to reach down and grab her, but perhaps Gott instead was giving her permission to live.

  What sounded like shattering glass and hard pounding from small boulders penetrated the previously pleasant atmosphere.

  “What the…” Kiah jolted to his feet, somehow transferring her blanket-covered legs to Mammi’s lap, but not without considerable after-the-fact pain.

  Hallie barely kept from yowling.

  Kiah scooted out the pantry door.

  Shattering glass? Wait. Maybe he shouldn’t be out there. Should she call him back? It surely wasn’t safe—

  “Whoa! These hailstones are as big as softballs,” he called from the kitchen.

  Softballs? Did hail come in that size?

  Hallie straightened, tempted to go see the supersize hail for herself, but even that slight movement caused a tidal wave of misery. Never mind yowling. She was fairly certain she howled. She fought a wave of nausea.

  Daadi gave her a strange look and muttered something about roof damage as he slowly stood and followed Kiah into the other room.

  Softball-sized hail. Hallie had never seen such a thing. But that aside, wasn’t it dangerous to leave the safety of an interior, windowless pantry for a kitchen filled with windows during a possible tornado with softball-sized hail?

  She glanced at Mammi who was craning her neck, apparently trying to see for herself.

  Another sound like glass shattering, followed by a moment of silence before a softer, gentler sound of probably much smaller, gentler hail—maybe pebble-sized—started tapping on the porch roof.

  Daadi and Kiah returned to the pantry wide-eyed and grinning now that most of the danger was over.