Finally My Forever

by Brooke St. James

  "I might," I said, "but I might need some more convincing when I see you tomorrow."

  He smiled and pulled me by the waist into his embrace. He bent and placed one last kiss on my mouth. It felt like heaven, and I wanted to moan, but I made a conscious effort not to. I was smiling at the thought when he let me go.

  "What?" he asked.

  "Nothin'," I said, still grinning slightly. "I had fun tonight. Thanks for everything."

  He opened the door of his truck and stood there, poised to get in. "I'll call you in the morning," he said.

  I nodded and held up a hand to wave. I felt like I wanted to tell him I love you. I didn't want him to drive off without hearing it from me, but I knew that was ridiculous, so I just stood there and smiled as he got in his truck and backed out of the driveway.

  He rolled down his window to wave one last time before driving off, and I turned to go into the house feeling like I was walking on clouds. He's calling me in the morning; he's calling me in the morning, I thought, grinning uncontrollably as I opened the door.

  Isaac was in the living room watching TV, but Ryan must have been in his room. "Ryan wanted me to tell you he needed fifteen minutes in the shower before you could run any hot water," Isaac said, not looking away from the TV.

  "That's fine," I said, stooping to love on Roscoe.

  Isaac looked at me. "And he gave Roscoe a big ole hunkin' pork chop."

  "Did he really?" I asked.

  Isaac smiled. "No, he gave him a little piece. I'm just messing with you."

  "You're spoiled rotten," I said, still petting Roscoe, who had rolled onto his back for a belly rub.

  "I can't believe you went roller skating," Isaac said. "Your quads and hammys are gonna be feeling that tomorrow."

  I laughed. "I already told Micah that," I said. "It was so worth it, though." I stared into space as I remembered the highlights of this night. "I also ate at Velvet Meg's and I got to meet the chef."

  "Seriously?" he asked, looking impressed.

  "Yeah, Micah's family knows her."

  "He seems nice," he said.

  I let out a long, enamored sigh.

  "Uh-oh," he said. "That sounds like trouble."

  I let out a little laugh. "I'm in so much trouble," I agreed. "You have no idea."

  Chapter 19

  I picked up the Bible Micah gave me when I climbed into bed. The cover was soft, but the pages were stiff and unyielding, and I imagined it all broken in after years of use.

  I looked down at it, not really knowing where to begin. I thought about opening it and starting to read on the first page but ultimately decided to thumb through it, letting my eye fall on random places here and there. It seemed a bit mysterious to me, but I found myself being drawn to it. I read for a while before I set it on my nightstand and turned off my lamp, letting my head hit the pillow with a comfortable whoosh.

  I had a hard time going to sleep that night. I stared at the ceiling, thinking about our date and reliving the whole evening. It was so perfect, I wanted to go back to the beginning of it and do the whole thing over again.

  And then, my traitorous brain started having thoughts that weren't so enjoyable. My newly forming relationship with Micah was so special to me that I started having thoughts about things that could take it away. I thought about him going to work at Gina's house next week. I thought about how beautiful she was and knew she was the type who'd take advantage of having him as a captive audience. I imagined that home-cooked meal she and her mother would make. It would probably taste really good, and I was sure they would be super sweet and accommodating to Micah and his crew.

  I found myself feeling agitated and nervous until a random thought crossed my mind. It was a simple thought, but it gave me enough peace of mind to stop worrying about it and fall asleep. I thought if God truly wanted me to end up with Micah, then neither Gina nor anyone else would be able to interfere. If we were supposed to end up together, then we would. Period. I certainly wouldn't be able to control every pretty girl who crossed his path. All I could do was be myself, and if we were meant to be, then that would be enough.

  I slept like a rock once that thought sunk in, and woke up just before 9am to Roscoe stirring and sniffing at my arm. I glanced at my alarm clock and moaned something to my fuzzy little early bird about letting me get some rest on a Saturday. I stayed there for a few minutes, trying to go back to sleep before deciding it was hopeless.

  I picked up my phone from the nightstand and smiled as I stared down at it, noticing I already had a text from Micah. I wiped the sleep from my eyes and blinked, focusing on the screen.

  Micah: "Good morning sunshine. Call me when you get up."

  I instantly forgot all about how mad I was at Roscoe for waking me up. I reached over to pet his belly and spoke to him as if he was the best dog in the world. "He called me sunshine," I told Roscoe, cooing tone that made it sound like I was talking to him. His tail started thumping against my leg. "And he said I should call him," I added, still using baby talk.

  Roscoe was either overjoyed to hear the news or overjoyed by my excitement. He got to his feet and stared down at me with a wagging tail and what looked like a smile on his face.

  "I'll take you out in a minute," I said. I pressed the appropriate buttons to call Micah and cleared my throat once or twice, making sure my voice would work.

  "There she is," he said, answering his phone.

  The sound of his voice sent instant shivers through my body.

  "Good morning," I said, my voice betraying how sleepy I was.

  "Did you just wake up?" he asked.

  "Yeah, and I wasn't happy about it either—Roscoe's in big trouble."

  He laughed. "He woke you up?"

  "Yeah, he's used to my school schedule, so he stinks at sleeping in."

  "Why don't you bring him over for breakfast?" he asked.

  I smiled, loving the possibility of seeing him this soon. "At your house?" I asked.

  "Why not? I have eggs and bacon, and cereal and all that stuff. You wanna come over?"

  "You talked me into it."

  "It was the bacon, right?"

  I laughed. "Give me a few minutes to get dressed. Text me your address."

  "All right. I'll see you in a few," he said.

  "Sounds good."

  I had a huge smile on my face as I said goodbye and hung up the phone. "You wanna go to Micah's?" I asked Roscoe, petting him and getting him all pumped up just by the tone of my voice. He sprang off the bed and back onto it waiting for me to take him wherever we were going.

  We had a small fenced yard and I put Roscoe outside so I could get dressed in peace. I pulled on skinny jeans, Chuck Taylors, and an Adidas hoodie, and put my hair into a quick messy bun high on my head.

  I put on a little foundation, mascara, and lip-gloss since that was all I ever wore anyway. I read in a magazine one time that if you only did one thing to your face, you needed to curl your eyelashes. I went out and bought one of those little curler tools that same day, and ever since then, I always did it. It was years ago when I read that, but it was one of those things that stuck with me. I didn't have many beauty rituals, but curling my eyelashes was one of them.

  It took me less than 10 minutes to reach Micah's house. I knew his business was relatively new, so I was taken aback by how nice his place was. It looked to be as big as the house I was sharing with three other roommates, and caught myself feeling curious about the concrete business. Micah's truck must have been parked in the garage, because mine was the only car in the driveway. I checked his address again just to make sure I hadn't made a mistake.

  Once I got a good view of the front porch, I knew it was Micah's. Under my feet, was the most beautiful stained concrete I'd ever seen. It was a wide porch that ran most of the length of the house. It had a big sweeping swirl pattern that was stained several shades of brown and mahogany. I never realized concrete was an art form, but obviously it was. I stared down at it knowing for sure Micah'
s hands had created it.

  He opened the door, and while still staring at the floor, I said, "This is so beautiful!"

  "The porch was my guinea pig," he said. "You should see the basement."

  I glanced at him to find that he was stooping to greet Roscoe. He was wearing athletic clothes—a pair of fitted sweatpants and a black, long sleeved Nike t-shirt.

  "You look sporty," I said.

  We made eye contact for the first time when I said that, and I was surprised again at the sight of his face. It was like every time I was away from him I forgot how handsome he was, and when I saw him again it took me off guard.

  "I went to the gym earlier," he said, smiling.

  "You already went to the gym?" I asked, unable to comprehend that sort of dedication.

  "You look sporty too," he said, pinching my hoodie, as he straightened to stand next to me.

  "Yeah, but I didn't earn it," I said. "I just rolled out of bed and put this on."

  His eyes roamed over my face as he took me in with that confident, easy smile I loved so much. "You wanna come in?"

  I nodded and followed him through the threshold. "I really can't believe how nice this house is," I said. "I should have gotten into concrete instead of teaching."

  He glanced at me with a grin. "My business is doing well, but I'm not at this level yet."

  My expression was curious, and he continued.

  "I got a settlement from the accident."

  "Oh, I'm sorry," I said, feeling bad at the turn the conversation had taken.

  He smiled, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. "Don't be," he said. "It was a crazy, life-changing experience, but I'm starting to appreciate the bigger picture. Natalie's better off where she is, and my life is what it is because of the path I've taken."

  Roscoe ran to check out the rest of the house as Micah and I walked toward the kitchen. "Is he okay?" I asked. Micah nodded. I didn't want to brush by the subject while he was being so open, so I said, "Appreciating the bigger picture is a gift—I'm getting there myself, and there's a lot to be said for it."

  I sat on a barstool while Micah made breakfast. Roscoe checked out the house for several minutes but ultimately decided he wanted to be in there with us and curled up on a rug by the sink.

  Micah was a clown of the first degree. He made up an impromptu breakfast song while he was cooking. It was so cool and he sang it so well that I asked him where he heard it. He laughed like he thought my question was cute and said he made it up.

  The weather was crisp and beautiful, and we spent the entire day together. Micah had some yard work to do and needed to wash his truck, but he said he wanted me to hang out while he did it. I pulled some weeds for him while he got his chores done. He had a fenced yard that was three times the size of mine, and Roscoe thought he'd died and gone to heaven.

  It was the first day I spent at Micah's house, but I felt the oddest sense of comfort, like I'd been there a thousand times. No sense of comfort could prepare me for the shock I felt at the first sight of his beautiful basement floors. It was mid afternoon by the time he gave me the official tour of the house, which ended with the basement.

  "I didn't even know stain came in this many colors!" I said, staring slack-jawed at the unbelievable floors. An intricate design with swirls and stars had been cut into the concrete, and the colors of stain that accentuated the design were absolutely breathtaking. There was brown, black, blue, red, gold, green and orange—a rainbow of colors.

  "You like it?" he asked.

  "It's… I’m…" I stammered. "Did you seriously make this with your own hands?"

  I looked at him and saw that he was smiling. "You like it?"

  "It's really the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. It should be in an art gallery or something. You should have people over every night just so they can appreciate it."

  "I have you to appreciate it," he said, drawing me into his arms. I went willingly, hanging onto him as if I never wanted to let go. He'd been working outside, and I breathed in a wonderful mix of his shower gel and deodorant mixed with a distinctly masculine smell from excursion. What sort of man was he that even his sweat smelled good? I squeezed him tightly, hoping his scent was rubbing off on my shirt so I could revisit it once I got home.

  We ate dinner together before Roscoe and I left. I didn't want to leave, but I had some things to tend to at home, and this fairytale day had to come to an end at some point.

  Micah kissed me as I was leaving. It was amazing and knee-buckling, but it wasn't as passionate as the one we shared in my driveway, and I knew he was trying to hold back for the sake of propriety. My urges wanted to say to heck with propriety, but I knew Micah and I were doing the right thing by taking it slow.

  Trish was at home when I got back. Ryan was there too, but he must've been in his room because Trish was the only one in the living room. She had text me earlier, so she knew where I had been.

  "Did you stay at his house all day? She asked as soon as I walked in the door grinning from ear to ear.

  She called Roscoe over, and he jumped on the couch to greet her. "We got out once to get some tire cleaning stuff at an auto supply store, but other than that we stayed at his house. It's beautiful. You should see it. I'll have to take you over there sometime. It's not far from here."

  She loved on Roscoe as she listened to me, so I continued.

  "He did some concrete work in his house, and it's the coolest thing I've ever seen. I didn't even know you could do that with concrete."

  "When are you gonna see him again?"

  "I'm going to church with him in the morning."

  She smiled at me and lifted her eyebrows. "I'm technically not going with him because he's singing, and he has to be there really early, but I'm meeting him at the late service. Do you want to come? We're planning on having lunch with his parents afterward, and I know they wouldn't mind if you come."

  She shook her head. "Maybe sometime, but I have plans to go on a hike with Shane tomorrow if it doesn't rain."

  "What do you think I should wear?" I asked.

  She shrugged. "I think you'd be fine in jeans. I don't think you have to wear your Sunday best to church nowadays."

  Chapter 20

  I'd been excited about going to church, but now that I was in the car on my way there, I was feeling reluctant and fearful, and wondering why I ever agreed to go there in the first place.

  I gave some serious consideration to texting Micah and telling him I couldn't make it—especially when I pulled into the parking lot. I'd seen this place from the road before. I knew it was big, but pulling into the parking lot made me experience a whole new wave of doubt. I was in over my head. I didn't even know what door to enter through, much less how to find the Bennetts. I hadn't even thought to ask Micah if his parents would be there. I just assumed they would and it would be easy to find them, but the prospect of that didn't look so good now that I saw the size of this place.

  I pulled into a parking spot and sat there for a few seconds, seriously considering leaving before I opened the door and made myself put one foot in front of the other. I saw people entering through a main door, but I imagined them putting some sort of sash over me that proclaimed I was a first time visitor, so went for one of the doors off to the side in hopes of drawing as little attention to myself as possible.

  My plan of attack was to get to the side of the main auditorium so I could try to spot the Bennetts. If I couldn't find them, I'd slip into a spot where I could disappear.

  I was walking down a long hallway toward an open set of doors when I saw a ladies room. I decided to take a second to check my face and hair one last time, and while I was at it, I used the restroom. I didn't really have to go, but I was taking my sweet time getting to the service.

  My heart sank when I went to the sink to wash my hands after using the restroom. You would know that Gina Young would be standing at the row of sinks staring at herself in the mirror.

  A rush of nerves and frustration wa
shed over me, but I kept my expression neutral as if I hadn't even seen her. I turned on the sink, staring down at my hands the whole time.

  "I wonder if God likes it when people start coming to church just to check out guys," she said.

  I knew the comment was directed toward me, and I could feel hot blood rising to my face. I absolutely couldn't believe I heard her right. I glanced at her through the reflection in the mirror, but she was just staring at herself as if she hadn't spoken at all. My first instinct was to forget about washing my hands and walk out of the restroom without saying a word to her, but it felt like that'd be letting her win, and was just too stubborn for that.

  "I wonder if God likes it when Christians try to discourage new people from coming to church," I retorted, praying my voice didn't betray how nervous I was.

  She turned to glare at me with an ice-cold expression that I returned as best I could even though that type of thing was way out of my element.

  "God probably doesn’t mind if I discourage the new people who are here to see Micah Bennett instead of Him," she said.

  I wanted to blow my top, but I regarded her calmly with a slight smile that only made her scowl deepen. "You can think what you want to think, but I'm here for church," I said. "I can see Micah any time I want. I don't have to wait for Sunday."

  I came really close to adding that I didn't have to hire him to build a patio at my house either, but I kept that to myself.

  She huffed, and said, "You wish," as she turned on her heel and headed for the door, leaving me speechless and shaken.

  Another lady came in just as she left and I was grateful she hadn't come in sooner. I numbly finished washing my hands, contemplating whether or not I should stay at the service or call it a day. Something felt wrong about going to a church service as angry as I was.

  As I had that thought, an older lady came out of one of the stalls. I didn't know how much she had heard, so I tried to get out of there as quickly as possible. I gave her a quick nod of acknowledgement as I pulled a paper towel from the dispenser.