Smoldering Desires

by C. E. Knipes

  “Again. That’s a laugh. You got in a few lucky punches and then ran. Let’s see what happens when you have to stand and fight like a man.”

  As he spoke, he took a menacing step toward me.

  Having grown up with four older brothers, I had learned early on how to take care of myself. Add to that the boxing lessons my father had insisted we each take, and I could handily defend myself.

  Brent took a right swing at my head. I blocked it with my left arm and landed my right fist squarely on his jaw. He dropped to the pavement like a wet sack of flour. However, he was on his feet in an instant. I settled into my stance and delivered two more blows to his face. Once again, he went down. All of this happened in less than a minute.

  At that moment, Sebastian stepped between the two of us. Brent was struggling to his feet again.

  “That’s enough, Brent. You’ve sufficiently proven what an asshole you are. Move along, or I’ll move you along. If you don’t, I’m going to call the police.”

  I’d yet to hear such anger in Sebastian’s voice.

  “Fuck you, Tantalos!”

  He turned to me.

  “I’m not done with you either, dickhead. I’ll catch you alone sometime, and then we’ll see how things turn out.”

  “Anytime, Brent.”

  He turned without another word and headed up the trail.

  “Are you okay, Evan?”

  “I’m fine. What are the chances of running into him here? Christ, is he still following us?”

  “I don’t know. This place is well known to a lot of people.”

  My anger got the better of me. It was part frustration at having to continually deal with Brent.

  “I’m fucking getting sick of him, Sebastian. I wish we could just get rid of him.”

  “Believe me, Evan. He’s not easy to get rid of. Let’s not talk about this anymore. Can we just go home?”

  “Yes, let’s go home, Sebastian. I don’t want to be any place he is.”

  We rode home in a strained silence. I wasn’t mad at Sebastian, just at the situation. Or maybe part of me was mad. Maybe part of me blamed him for the situation. For constantly having to deal with Brent. Whatever the reasons, I was determined to take it out on him.

  We were almost to my dorm parking lot.

  “Do you want to come over, or should I drop you off here?”

  “Here is fine.”

  I couldn’t keep the anger from my voice. When he stopped in the parking lot, he reached over and placed his hand on my arm. I already had my other hand on the door handle. I easily slid out of his grip and exited the Jeep.

  “Don’t be mad at me, Evan. I’m not responsible for where Brent shows up.”

  “Aren’t you? He’s here at this fucking college because he’s after you. Just like he chases you every time the two of you break up. How soon before you get back together with him?”

  “That’s unfair, Evan. I have no intention of getting back with Brent.”

  “Why not? You have every other time.”

  “I didn’t this past time.”

  “Yes, because you had me to distract you. Till you’re over being mad at him and go back to him.”

  “I’m not sure where all this is coming from. But I’m going to go. I’ll call you later.”

  “Sure.”

  His next words were cut short by my slamming of the passenger door. He didn’t leave as I walked to the front door of my dorm. I didn’t look back. As I grabbed the handle, I could see his Jeep in the glass of the door. Sebastian was sitting inside, staring at me.

  When I got to my room, I called Jessica. I was irritated when I got her voice mail. I sent her a text and rolled a joint while I waited for her to respond. Before I lit it, I popped in Pink Floyd’s Wish You Were Here and let myself be swept away by the music.

  I wasn’t sure who I was more pissed at: Sebastian or Brent, the latter for bringing out the Neanderthal in me. I usually wasn’t prone to fighting, unless I was severely provoked. Brent had only taken a step toward me and I had laid him out. Sebastian said he was crazy, but was that crazy in the clinical sense?

  I felt my phone vibrate and hoped it was Jessica. I was disappointed to see it was Sebastian calling me. I let it go straight to voice mail. Where the hell was Jessica? Especially on a Sunday night? Of course, I knew any night of the week could qualify as a party night for her.

  As the next song ended, my phone vibrated again. It was a text from Sebastian.

  “Will u please call me so we can talk about this?”

  I sent an immediate reply.

  “Not in the mood 2 talk tonight. Need 2 think about what happened and decide what I’m going 2 do about it.”

  “Okay, Evan. Please don’t make any hasty decisions till we can talk. Have a good night.”

  I didn’t respond.

  I had just grabbed another beer from the mini-fridge when there was a knock on my door. Thinking it was Jessica, I opened the door without asking who it was.

  I was standing face-to-face with Brent.

  Chapter Eight

  I regretted the first question out of my mouth before I had even asked it.

  “How’d you find me?”

  Of course he had simply looked me up in the online student directory.

  “Can I come in?”

  “No, you can’t. We can talk in the lounge area. Say what you need to say and then get out, Brent.”

  I wasn’t normally one for bad manners, but my dislike of this man had increased tenfold since today’s encounter. There was no way I was getting behind a closed door with him. He bristled at my refusal.

  “Fine!”

  The menace from him was almost palpable. It seemed he wasn’t used to being spoken to like this. For the second time that day, he took a step toward me. I stepped back and assumed a boxer’s stance. He stopped and glared at me.

  “I want you to stay away from Sebastian.”

  I started to speak, but he raised his hand in protest.

  “Let me finish. Sebastian and I spent three years together and had a great relationship. Unfortunately, events that proved to be out of our control led to our breaking up.”

  “The story I heard was that your insecurities were the reason you broke up. In addition to your mental illness and your cheating.”

  I knew it was a cheap shot. But I wanted this over, and quickly.

  Brent winced as if I’d struck him. This was followed by a look that made the hair on my neck stand on end. I half expected him to take a swing at me. Instead he ignored me and continued his speech.

  “Sebastian and I belong together, and he knows that. We don’t need any distractions like you to come between us.”

  “Apparently, I’m not the first distraction that’s come between the two of you. Sebastian told me he’s done with you for good. You know this. You’ve just been unable or unwilling to accept it.”

  “If you continue to see Sebastian, you’ll regret it.”

  “Don’t threaten me, Brent. The only regret I have is seeing you for the second time today.”

  “You’ve got a smart mouth, McGarrity. I can take care of that for you.”

  “You can try, asshole. Again.”

  It was clear that last retort pushed him over the edge. I could see it in his eyes. He became a coiled rattlesnake, ready to strike.

  I took another step back from him and raised my fists in front of my torso.

  “What the fuck is going on here?”

  Jessica and Calvin were standing at the end of the hallway that led to the lounge.

  “It’s none of your fuckin’ business, bitch.”

  Before another word was exchanged, Calvin stepped from behind Jessica. He moved lithely, like a cat. He grabbed Brent by the throat with one hand and lifted him off the ground. Brent looked like a ragdoll, his feet flailing. He had both hands on Calvin’s hand, desperately trying to remove it from his throat.

  “Mind your manners, Brent, or you’ll be eating your teeth for dinn
er. Now apologize to Jessica and Evan.”

  Apparently, Brent believed Calvin’s threat. He mumbled a feeble apology to me and Jessica. Calvin set him down on the floor, on his ass, not his feet. Hard. Brent stood up without a word and headed down the hall. He was gasping for air as he went. Before he entered the main lounge, he turned and faced us.

  “This isn’t over, McGarrity. Not by a long shot.”

  Calvin feinted a lunge at him and Brent jetted into the main lounge.

  “Thanks, Calvin. You have impeccable timing.”

  When he was gone, Jessica grabbed me by the arm.

  “Why was that asshole here?”

  “To harass me. Again. I tried calling you but got your voice mail.”

  “I’m sorry, Evan. Calvin and I decided to go to the Vital Spot. I had my phone turned off.”

  “Did something happen?”

  Calvin sensed I wanted to talk to Jessica alone.

  “I’m gonna split, Jessica. It looks like you two need to talk. Let’s meet in the morning for breakfast. Eight a.m. at the Union Cafeteria.”

  “Sounds good, Calvin.”

  He bent and kissed Jessica.

  “See you later, Evan.”

  “Good night, Calvin.”

  As soon as he was gone, I grabbed Jessica and pulled her into my room. I closed the door behind me. I lit a joint and filled Jessica in on what had happened at the park.

  “Christ. It does sound like he’s been following you again.”

  “That’s what I’ve been thinking.”

  “What are you going to do now? You have to at least give Sebastian the chance to explain himself.”

  “Oh, I will, but he’s going to sweat a little bit first.”

  We smoked a second joint and had several more beers. It was well past midnight when I walked Jessica home. When I returned to my room, Sebastian was sitting in the small lounge, waiting for me.

  “How long have you been here?”

  “Not long. When you didn’t answer my calls or texts, I decided to came over and let myself in. I was heading down the hill when I saw you leave with Jessica. I was hoping you’d be back soon. Do you feel like talking yet, Evan?”

  “It’s kinda late, Sebastian. Can we wait till morning?”

  “I don’t want you going to bed mad at me.”

  Truth be told, my anger had cooled thanks to the beers and the joints. However, my lust for him had been ignited once again.

  “Okay, you can come in. I’m still not in the mood for talking. But I have something else in mind.”

  “I like the way you think, Evan McGarrity.”

  Needless to say, we didn’t get to sleep till late. When my alarm sounded, I was hard-pressed to find it and turn it off.

  Sebastian stirred beside me.

  “What time is it?”

  “It’s almost seven. I’m starving. We need to shower and get some breakfast before your first class at nine. But first I need to take care of this headache.”

  I reached over to the nightstand, opened the drawer, and grabbed the bottle of aspirin. I was first in the shower. While Sebastian was taking his turn, I began thinking about the events of last night. Had I made a mistake in letting Sebastian spend the night. As usual, my body’s desires had betrayed me. I hadn’t even told him about my encounter with Brent. Was I blaming him unfairly? He certainly wasn’t responsible for Brent’s actions.

  When Sebastian entered the room, he sensed I was ready to talk.

  “Is everything okay, Evan?”

  I began by telling Sebastian about Brent’s visit yesterday.

  “I’m so sorry you had to go through that, Evan. Maybe with these last two instances we have enough for a restraining order. This could be deemed harassment. We will go and talk to Officer Brennan today.”

  “That sounds good, Sebastian. I also wanted to apologize for my behavior last night. I know you don’t control Brent’s actions. I was just taking my frustrations out on you. Please forgive me.”

  “There’s nothing to forgive. I know this is a very stressful situation we’re in. I’m just glad we have each other to get through it with. Now, let’s go eat.”

  I texted Jessica to let her know that Sebastian and I were headed to the cafeteria for breakfast.

  I received a one-word response: “whore.”

  I knew she was kidding, and the next text proved me correct.

  “Just kidding. I’m actually heading there 4 breakfast with Calvin. We’ll see u soon.”

  Calvin and Jessica were waiting for us in front of the cafeteria. Once inside, I grabbed a tray and piled on scrambled eggs, ham, bacon, and toast. I added a large orange juice and an even larger coffee to my booty. Sebastian’s tray matched mine. Sebastian paid for us, and the four of us entered the dining hall to find a seat. When Sebastian went back for seconds, I quickly brought Jessica and Calvin up to speed on things.

  “I think we’re going to make it through this Brent fiasco.”

  After breakfast, Sebastian and I paid a visit to Officer Brennan. Unfortunately, he informed us we most likely still didn’t have a solid case against Brent. We thanked him for his time, and had to be content in knowing the case against Brent was at least steadily building.

  *

  The next three weeks flew by, and soon it was the Tuesday before the Thanksgiving holiday. We had seen very little of Brent, only in class. And nothing of Drake or Mike. I wasn’t sure if that was good news or bad news about Brent. Was he laying low, plotting his revenge? Sebastian, Jessica, and I would be leaving for Lancaster tomorrow morning. Last night, Sebastian and I had decided we’d leave for his folks’ house the day after Thanksgiving. We would stay there for a few days and then stop in to see my parents on our way back to campus.

  I showered, dressed, and walked to the Student Union to meet Jessica for lunch. Sebastian had two midterms this afternoon. I wouldn’t be connecting with him till dinner. I had finished my last midterm this morning. I called Jessica on the way to make sure she hadn’t forgotten. I got her voice mail. Which either meant she was hungover or in the shower. She returned my call within minutes.

  “Hi, Evan. Sorry about that. I overslept. I’ll be there in five minutes.”

  While I waited for Jessica to arrive, I sent Sebastian a quick text.

  “Good luck on your midterm.”

  His reply of “Thanks” was immediate.

  I waited inside the entrance for Jessica and she showed up within ten minutes. She gave me a big hug.

  “I need large amounts of coffee. I had way too much to drink last night.”

  “Lead the way, Jess.”

  After working our way through the line and piling my tray as high as humanly possible, Jessica and I took our usual table in the corner.

  “What are your plans for tonight, after dinner?”

  “After dinner, Sebastian’s having drinks with some of his soccer teammates. Although he quit the team, he’s still on friendly terms with most of them. He asked me to come along, but I’m not going to go out tonight. I want to pack and be ready to leave by ten a.m. tomorrow at the latest. The forecast is calling for snow again tonight and through tomorrow. Plus, I’m sure Drake will be there. I’m not in the mood to see him. Or run the risk of seeing Brent.”

  “What about you?”

  “Calvin and I are going to see a movie in Buffalo. That is if it’s not too icy. Then probably dinner after. I was thinking about going out tonight for a few farewell drinks. But I still need to pack. We’re not leaving till ten, but I still I don’t want to be hungover for the ride.”

  “When is Calvin leaving?”

  “Tomorrow. He’s catching the noon flight out of Rochester to Vermont. He’ll be on a skiing vacation with his family. I won’t see him for an entire week.”

  “That sucks. I’m sure you’ll be talking and texting every day, all day.”

  “Oh, that’s a guarantee.”

  After two more cups of coffee, and a piss stop, Jessica and I parted ways, her
to sleep off her hangover and me to get some packing done. When I got back to my room, I put Pink Floyd’s Animals in the CD player and lay on the bed to listen to the first song. The next thing I knew, my phone was ringing. It was Sebastian.

  “Hi, Evan. What are you doing? I texted you but got no response.”

  “Hey there. I was going to pack, but instead I took an unscheduled nap. Quite a long one it seems. Are you done with your midterm?”

  “Yes. I’m sure I passed. It’s a relief to be done for the break. Why don’t you meet me at Mandy’s for dinner? I’m only a few minutes from there.”

  “Okay, I’ll see you soon.”

  Sebastian was seated at our favorite table. He had already ordered dinner for us. Mine was a ham and cheddar hoagie with fries.

  As soon as I sat across from him, I knew something was wrong.

  “What is it, Sebastian? What happened with Brent?”

  The look on his face confirmed my suspicions.

  “You know me so well, Evan. I didn’t want to keep this from you. But I know you’re going to be upset.”

  “Just tell me, Sebastian.”

  “Brent will be with the group that’s going out tonight. One of the guys on the team told me Drake invited him.”

  It felt like my stomach was being squeezed inside a large fist.

  “And you’re still going to go?”

  My question took him by surprise.

  “Yes. I’m not going to let Brent run my life. I think you should go as well.”

  “That won’t be happening. I wish for once you would stand up to Brent!”

  “What do you mean by that? I thought we were past this? Do you think I want to hang out with Brent? Do you think I still have feelings for him?”

  “No, I’m sorry. I don’t know where that came from. I think I just need time away from Milton. Time to relax and recharge.”

  “I love you, Evan McGarrity. I want to be with you. Not Brent. Are we okay? I’m supposed to meet the guys now. We can talk about this more tonight when I get home.”

  “That’s fine, Sebastian. No need. We’re good. Have fun.”

  “Are you sure you don’t mind if I go out for drinks?”

  “No, I don’t mind. Have a good time. Text me if you get the chance.”