No Safe Place

by Mary Head

  A wooden swing was suspended from one of the branches of the oak tree, and David watched it sway gently in a breeze. David had put it up after he’d gotten rid of Hannah’s swing set because she said that sometimes she just wanted to swing.

  There was a bright red hummingbird feeder hanging from one of the lower branches on the opposite side of the trunk, and another one on a stand in the middle of the flower bed.

  “Hannah still love hummingbirds?” Karen murmured.

  David glanced at her, seeing her small smile and raised eyebrows, and nodded. “Yeah. She’s even got a tattoo of one.”

  Karen gave a quiet laugh, and then sighed.

  “I feel like I’ve missed everything.” David looked over at her, his expression blank, and she added, “Everything that’s important, everything that matters.”

  “That was your choice,” he said unsympathetically, tipping his head back and draining the last of the beer from his bottle.

  “I know,” she said again, her voice catching a little. He watched her press her lips together, her hand tightening around the bottle as the condensation leaked between her fingers. There was a strange, unfamiliar urge to comfort her that kept tugging at him, but he ignored it.

  “It’s funny,” she started, “how I never really cared all that much when I missed something. Birthdays, prom, high school graduation.” She took a breath, and David watched as she stared around the yard. “I never forgot, I just always thought there’d be another time, and another, and another. I knew you were better for her than I’d ever be. I knew she was safe and happy, and the years just. . . passed, I guess.”

  David gave a short, humorless laugh as he set his empty bottle down behind him with a hollow clunk. “You took her existence for granted.”

  Karen nodded and looked down at her lap, staring at her beer clutched between her hands. “Yeah, I did.”

  “And now,” he continued, “you regret it.”

  She nodded again and looked at him. Tears gathered in the corners of her eyes, and when she blinked one began a slow trickle down her cheek. David shook his head.

  “I’m not going to say I’m sorry, Karen. You were the one who chose yourself over us, over Hannah.” He stopped and took a deep breath, feeling his anger rise again as old wounds tried to tear themselves open.

  “You have to find her,” Karen said, wiping a hand over her cheek to brush away the lingering moisture.

  “I know,” he replied. His fists clenched, fingers curving over the edge of the step on which he sat. The wood dug into his palms but he didn’t feel it, didn’t feel anything but the constant ache in his chest.

  Silence hung between them, and they both let their eyes settle anywhere but on each other.

  “I don’t have the slightest clue where she is,” he said finally. “I just know she’s alone and scared. And when I find –” He swallowed against his building rage and continued. “When I find the bastard he’ll be lucky if he lives long enough to get arrested.”

  “Just don’t do anything stupid.” He frowned at her and she added, “She’s your daughter, and she’s going to need you after this.”

  He nodded, and then stood to get another beer.

  Chapter 33

  Juliet parked along the curb in front of David’s house, frowning at the silver Mercedes parked in his driveway. It was unfamiliar to her, and certainly nothing an agent would drive, at least none that they knew. As she walked past it, she noted the license plate and model, and flipped open the safety strap on her weapon, just in case.

  The living room was empty, she noticed as she passed through, though the television was on with the volume low, telling her that David was likely home. The kitchen was empty as well, and everything seemed perfectly normal, except for the car in the driveway, and David’s conspicuous absence.

  Frowning, she turned towards the stairs, and then stopped when she heard the faint sound of laughter.

  Juliet followed the sound to the back door and pulled it open, eyes widening in surprise. On the steps of the deck were David and Karen, sitting side by side, each with a beer in hand.

  “David?” she asked, her brow wrinkling in confusion. “What – Karen?”

  David twisted around and then stood quickly. Juliet looked very cross with him and he knew it was due to Karen’s presence. “Jules, I –”

  Karen stood as well, wobbling a bit as her heel caught between the deck boards, and leaned against David as she tugged her shoe lose. “Hello again, Juliet.”

  Karen’s tone was just a little condescending, and Juliet glared at her a moment before turning to David. “David, what the hell?”

  He sighed and ran a hand over his face, shrugging off Karen’s hand and moving towards Juliet. “Jules, she’s just –”

  “Just what? What the fuck she is doing here?” Juliet folded her arms over her chest and fixed them both with a hard stare.

  Every time Karen showed up things ended badly. She and David would fight, Hannah would get upset, and Juliet was left to calm everyone down. What bothered her most, though, was that unlike Thursday night’s near catastrophe, Karen and David seemed friendly, too friendly for her liking.

  “You know, I’m still standing right here,” Karen said, her tone annoyed as she looked back and forth between David to Juliet.

  David sighed and turned to his ex-wife. “Karen, I’m sorry. Maybe you should –”

  “Yeah, I know,” Karen interrupted. She set her beer bottle down and picked up her purse, slipping it over her shoulder. “I was just leaving.”

  Karen pushed past Juliet and into the house, striding quickly to the front door. David glared briefly at Juliet as he trailed after Karen, and Juliet shook her head, huffing as she went back inside, slamming the door behind her.

  David caught up to Karen at the door, holding it open as she stepped outside again. She rummaged in her purse for her car keys and then looked up at him. “You have my number at the hotel, and my cell?”

  “Yes,” he answered.

  “And you’ll call if anything happens?”

  “Yes,” he said again with a small smile.

  Karen’s expression was serious as she looked up at him, and she took a breath.

  “I mean it, David.” She blinked and dabbed a finger at the corner of her eye. “Anything. Just – just find her. Please.”

  David gave in and stepped out onto the front porch, putting an arm around her shoulders and pulling her into a hug. She wrapped one arm around him and squeezed, then pulled away.

  “Anything,” he said quietly. “I’ll call.”

  With a nod, Karen turned and walked to her car. David stayed on the porch for a minute longer and then went back inside to face Juliet. He found her in the kitchen, holding a beer and fighting with a stubborn cap. He moved to her side and put his hand over hers, sliding the bottle from her grip. A second later, he twisted off the cap and dropped it on the counter, holding out the bottle for her to take.

  Juliet snatched the beer from his hand and put a few paces between them before whirling to face him. “What the fuck was that bitch doing here?”

  David winced at her words, knowing that if she was using that many swear words, she was well and truly pissed. “Jules, come on.”

  She glared at him as he took a step towards her. “No. Don’t,” she ordered, holding up a hand to stop him. She knew how this worked. She would get pissed off, he would offer her a half assed apology to placate her, give her a hug, and she would cave. Sometimes she hated being in love with such an infuriating bastard.

  He sighed and stayed where he was, leaning back against the counter.

  “She’s concerned about Han –” he started to explain.

  “Oh, really?” Juliet gave David an incredulous look. “Karen Maddox is concerned about someone other than herself? That’s fucking novel.”

  She took a long drink of her beer and turned away from David. It was easier for her to stay mad when she wasn’t looking at him.

  David sigh
ed again. “Yeah, she is. She went back to New York and took a few days leave.”

  Juliet scoffed. “So, what? She’s here until we find Hannah?”

  “Yeah.”

  Juliet could almost hear him shrug, and she huffed and walked away, heading towards the living room.

  “She’s Hannah’s mother, Jules,” he said, trailing after her. “She has a right to care about what happens to our daughter.”

  Juliet took another large swallow of her beer as she stopped by the couch. The bottle was already half empty and her hand tightened around the neck.

  “Right,” she muttered. Then she spun around and glared at David, pointing a finger at him as she spoke. “Except Karen hasn’t been a mother to Hannah, ever! She shows up when it suits her, or when she thinks she can get close to you, get back in your good graces, and –”

  “Oh, please,” he said, rolling his eyes. “This has nothing to do with Karen and me. There is no Karen and me, not anymore, not for decades, Juliet.”

  Her glare faltered a bit at the use of her full name. David rarely did that when it was just the two of them, except for when he was teasing her, or worse, when he was mad at her.

  He stepped forward, looking hard at her. “That bridge was burned, torn down and destroyed. So what’s your real issue?”

  Juliet sighed and glanced down at the floor for a moment, then looked up again and met his eyes. “My issue is that every time that – that woman – shows up, Han gets her hopes up. She thinks her mom is going to be there, is going to actually be her mom, and then the same shit happens. Karen is Karen.”

  David frowned, and Juliet turned away, moving towards the window. She wrapped her arms around her midsection, bottle held off to her left side.

  “And I have to pick up the pieces,” she added quietly. “And I just can’t bear the thought of Han having to deal with whatever shit her mother decides to pull this time, after whatever she’s going through right now.”

  David swallowed hard at the catch in her voice and crossed the short distance to stand behind her.

  “Jules,” he said, lifting his hands to rest on her shoulders. She shrugged him off and inched closer to the window, but he moved as well, closing the space and settling his hands on her shoulders again.

  This time she let him, and he leaned forward a little, lips close to her ear, his voice soft as he spoke.

  “Jules, I’m sorry. I just – she’s Han’s mother.”

  Juliet shivered at his proximity. She knew what he was saying, though. Karen had every right to be concerned about her daughter, despite not having seen her in six years.

  “I know,” she said finally.

  “And I hear what you’re saying, but I think this time will be different.”

  Juliet took a breath, though she didn’t reply, and David gently turned her around. Her arms fell to her sides and he took the bottle from her hand, setting it on the side table by the couch. He looked her in the eyes and smiled slightly before pulling her to him for a hug.

  “You know I appreciate you being there for Han, right?” he whispered into her hair. “Saving my ass with all that girl stuff I’m no good at.”

  Juliet laughed lightly. “Yeah.”

  David pulled back and looked down at her. “And Karen or no Karen, Han loves you.”

  Juliet nodded. She knew exactly how Hannah felt; she had never doubted that. It was just that seeing Karen, and Karen with David, drove her crazy and reminded her of exactly what she didn’t have, what she could never have.

  She let herself look back at him, losing herself in his eyes, so blue and always full of emotion. There was just the barest hint of tears, lines at the corners from smiling and worrying, and something else she couldn’t place, something that made her stomach flip more than usual.

  He lifted one hand and cupped her face, sweeping his thumb over her cheek to catch the faintest hint of a tear that slipped from the corner of her eye. She tilted her head up, he dipped his head just a bit, and then the doorbell rang, shattering the moment.

  Juliet took a quick step to the side, away from the caress of David’s thumb and the comforting warmth of his body, and took a deep breath as she averted her gaze.

  “That’ll be Eli with food,” she said, and then stepped around David, anxious to put some space between them. “I’ll, um, get the door.”

  Chapter 34

  Jackie was stretched out on the couch later that night, the only light in the room coming from the TV. The remote was in his hand and he was flipping listlessly through the channels, finding nothing of interest to watch. TV sucked on Saturday nights, especially when you only got so many stations.

  He paused when he reached one of the public access stations, his thumb hovering over the channel button. It was the one of those televised college courses, and he stared at it a moment.

  Sometimes he wished he had gone to college, done something more with his life, but money was an issue, as it tended to be, and they had had enough trouble saving up for Luke’s college fund.

  Jackie knew he wasn’t the smartest guy in the world, but he wasn’t stupid either, and thought he would’ve done okay in college. Hell, he could’ve still gone; he was 33, but he knew that people even older than him went to college. Maybe if he had gotten a degree, things would be different; different job, different prospects, different outlook on life.

  Maybe he wouldn’t have let Eddie talk him into all of this.

  His mind drifted to Hannah again, and a small frown creased his brow. He knew she had a degree already and was in graduate school, something he had learned in all the weeks they spent following her and gathering information on her. He envied her a little, envied her upbringing and the fact that she had a father who cared enough to want her to go to school and do well.

  Images ran through his mind, eight weeks’ worth of spying on her, following her to and from school, or the FBI building, or any of the other dozens of places she went, watching her interact with her friends and her dad. He remembered following her one night when she was with Agent Cole, his heart hammering hard in his chest at the thought of being caught, but knowing Eddie would be upset with him if he didn’t stay with her.

  They went to dinner and then for ice cream after, despite the chilly weather, and Jackie watched them as they walked down the sidewalk, each with a cone in one hand and her arm linked through her dad’s. He said something to her at one point that made her dissolve into giggles so strong she had to stop walking, and he laughed with her as she leaned against him for support, his arm sliding around her waist. When she calmed down, he dropped a kiss to the top of her head and gave her a squeeze before they continued down the sidewalk.

  That night had been the only time Jackie tried to back out, not sure if he could handle the idea of separating them, even for just a little while, but Eddie had convinced him again that they wouldn’t hurt her. He said it would be just for a little while to teach Agent Cole a lesson, and Jackie, always so weak-willed around his brother, had given in.

  The image of her as she was now, unconscious downstairs and handcuffed to the heater with bruises on her face and arms, made anger surge through him and he jabbed at the button to change the channel.

  Eddie had lied, plain and simple, and it made Jackie wonder what else he might have lied about.

  He focused on the TV and frowned a little at the procedural cop show that he’d switched to, currently showing an interrogation scene. He hit the button to change the channel again and his frown deepened when it turned out to be yet another one, showing a girl struggling against an attacker. The next channel was showing a team of policemen circling a building, and Jackie jumped when a loud bang sounded suddenly from outside, nearly dropping the remote on the floor.

  It was a minute before he realized it was the truck two houses down backfiring again, and he took a breath, closing his eyes as he brought his hand up to his face, blindly changing the channel again.

  It was some cooking show, and he breathed a relieved sig
h as he dropped the remote on the coffee table. He rubbed his hand over his cheek and closed his eyes again, waiting for the pounding in his chest to subside.

  A short while later he was fighting sleep when he heard what sounded like the creak of Eddie’s bedroom door.

  Jackie’s eyes snapped open, coming fully awake as he listened to the soft sounds of Eddie’s feet shuffling along the old hardwood floor. A moment later, he passed through the space between the couch and the bookshelf against the wall, either not noticing Jackie lying there or possibly thinking he was asleep and not bothering to check.

  Jackie lay still as his eyes followed Eddie’s progress to the hall, and his heart clenched when his brother stopped outside the door to the basement, his hand resting on the knob.

  “What’re you doing?” Jackie asked, rising quickly to his feet.

  Eddie jumped visibly and turned to face Jackie, his expression reproachful.

  “Christ, Jackie, you scared the shit out of me.”

  Jackie didn’t reply, staring intently at his brother, and Eddie’s eyes flicked to the TV.

  “How can you watch that without getting hungry?” he asked, smirking a little.

  Jackie ignored the question and instead repeated his. “What are you doing?”

  Eddie sighed. “That stupid truck woke me up, and I couldn’t go back to sleep, so I came out to get something to drink. Is that all right with you?”

  “Then why did you stop outside the basement?”

  “I was just. . . listening to see if she was awake yet.”

  “Why?” Jackie pressed, a tight feeling growing in his gut.

  “Jesus, you’re like a five-year-old,” Eddie finally snapped. “What’s with all the questions?”

  Jackie hesitated a moment, not sure how he wanted to phrase what he was going to say next.

  “I’ve seen you with her,” he said finally, carefully watching Eddie’s expression. “The way you touch her –”

  “Fucking hell,” Eddie interrupted, rolling his eyes. “Do you really think I’d – who do you think I am?”