Beautifully Insightful

by K. C. Lynn

  I don’t know who moved first – him or me – but suddenly our mouths are connected in a heated passion that is both hot and demanding. I moan the moment his tongue slips past my lips, his erotic taste flooding my senses and reaching all the way to my soul. Oh god, I’ve missed this, I’ve missed him.

  “I’ve missed you too, Em, so fucking much.”

  I hadn’t realized I said the words out loud until now, but I don’t care. I don’t care about anything except for feeling what this man does to me, what he has always done to me. I slide my fingers in his hair and grip the soft strands with desperation, wanting to get lost in him, wanting him to take me back to a time where nothing in the world mattered but us.

  “Goddamn, you are the sweetest fucking thing I’ve ever tasted,” he mumbles before pulling his mouth away to run his warm lips down the column of my throat.

  I want to tell him he tastes good too, but he has completely robbed me of speech and all I can manage is incoherent sounds. His lips descend to my collarbone, my breasts becoming swollen and achy, craving his touch. As if knowing my thoughts, he pulls down the front of my dress, bunching it at my waist, and wastes no time ridding me of my strapless bra. My sensitive breasts tumble free into his waiting hands and I gasp at the warm contact, my panties growing wetter by the second.

  A low growl erupts from his throat, his gaze hot and hungry as he stares at my exposed breasts. “I forgot how perfect your tits are,” he grates roughly before leaning in and taking a puckered, aching nipple into his hot, wet mouth.

  An explosion of fire erupts through my body and my head falls back on a cry. I gaze up at the clear, dark sky that is blanketed in a million stars, as I get lost in a storm of pleasure. Ryder’s hand moves to cup my other breast, giving it the greedy attention it yearns for. His thumb and forefinger pinch the sensitive tip with enough force that pleasure and pain become one.

  “Ryder!” I whimper and grind down on his erection, desperately seeking relief for the fierce ache between my thighs.

  He growls from the contact and lifts his hips for more pressure. “Jesus, Emily, you are going to burn me alive. I can feel the heat of your pussy through my fucking jeans.”

  His erotic words cause another wave of heat to pass through me. “Then take them off,” I say boldly, surprising myself.

  He groans in what sounds like disappointment. “No, baby, not here. I’m not fucking you here. I need a bed for when I get back inside of you, because I’m not going to stop fucking you for hours, Emily. I’m going to fuck you so goddamn hard you will feel me inside of you for weeks to come.”

  Oh god. Will it be tonight? Do I invite him inside when we get back to my house? Do I want to? My body most certainly does, but my scarred heart is a little hesitant. Do I really want him to consume me – body and soul – only to leave me again?

  “Stop that shit, stop fucking thinking. It’s not happening tonight, I know we have shit to sort out.”

  Is he talking about my father? About why he left?

  I get pulled out of my thoughts and cry out in pleasure when he takes a sharp nip at my beaded nipple. “I said stop fucking thinking, only feel, baby.”

  I follow his command, and push his open dress shirt down his arms then pull up the T-shirt he wears underneath. “Take this off so I can feel you against me.” He sheds himself of the shirt within seconds then pulls me in close, wrapping me in his strong embrace. Electricity shoots through my entire body, and all the oxygen flees from my lungs.

  “Damn, you have the softest skin I’ve ever felt,” he mumbles, burying his face into my neck.

  We do nothing for a moment but hold each other, feeling a connection that I know I will never feel with anyone else. I’ve tried, god I have tried to move on, but I couldn’t. I thought it was because I had no closure, but now that he’s back I know that isn’t the case. It’s because he still holds so much of my damaged heart.

  Ryder pries my knees apart from his hips before running his hands up the inside of my thighs. I moan, my body trembling in anticipation for what’s to come. He reaches my panty line then gently runs a knuckle down the center of my wet panties, causing slight shock waves to travel through my body. I gasp and he groans. “Fuck me, you are soaked.”

  My response is another moan as I thrust my hips toward his touch, craving more pressure. “Ryder, please,” I plead breathlessly.

  “Don’t worry, baby, I got you.” He pushes my panties aside and runs two fingers through my wet flesh, skimming over my swollen clit before inserting a single finger inside of me.

  “Oh god!” I cry out at the sweet invasion.

  His groan is guttural. “Oh fuck, your pussy is as hot and tight as I remember it.” He begins pumping his finger in and out of me. “Look, baby. Look between us, watch what my finger is doing to your sweet pussy.” I glance between our bodies, and the erotic sight has my inner walls clamping down around his finger. The need for release becomes so fierce, so overwhelming, that I feel like my body is about to combust.

  I grab onto his broad shoulders, my nails digging into the grooves of hard muscle, and I begin moving my hips in rhythm to his thrusts. “That’s it, take it, baby, fuck my finger.” I whimper at his dirty words and my body teeters on the edge, so close to shattering, and Ryder senses it. “Look at me, Emily!” My eyes snap to his at the command and I suck in a sharp breath at the intensity of them. He gives me a dirty grin. “Good girl. I want to see your pretty eyes when you come all over my hand.” With those words, he flicks his wrist and changes the position of his hand. His palm now stroking against my swollen, aching clit and his finger reaching a spot inside of me I didn’t know existed.

  “Oh, Ryder, it’s so good, I’m going to come,” I whimper breathlessly.

  “Goddamn right you are, and you are going to come fucking hard!” Leaning in, he takes one of my nipples into his mouth and bites down on it hard enough that the pain shoots straight to my clit and rocks my body with the best sensations.

  My eyes fall closed at the strength of my orgasm. “Keep your eyes open!” I snap them back open and stare into his heated gaze, his eyes conveying so many emotions it’s hard to name even one, and it does all sorts of things to my already tattered heart. After the final tremors of my orgasm, I drop my forehead on his, my body feeling exhausted, both physically and emotionally.

  Ryder withdraws his hand from between my legs then shocks me when he puts it into his mouth and sucks my wetness off of it. I gasp in surprise, and he expels a growl before locking his mouth with mine. His delicious taste, mixed in with my arousal, is beautifully erotic. He doesn’t pull away until we are both needing air. He brings me in closer and wraps me in his powerful embrace. I turn my face into his neck and breathe in his incredible scent. “You okay, Em?” he asks softly.

  “Yes, I’m more than okay,” I reply truthfully. I wish there were words to describe how I’m feeling in this moment.

  “Good.” He presses a kiss to the top of my head then I feel him reach for something beside him before covering me with it. I quickly realize it’s his dress shirt.

  I snuggle in closer to his hard, warm body, never wanting this feeling to end. The feeling of safety and contentment. A feeling I haven’t felt in six years.

  Chapter 12

  Emily

  I woke up the next morning feeling a light heartedness I haven’t felt in a really long time. My body was still humming with pleasure from Ryder’s intimate touch at the cliff, and my heart was warm from the kindness he showed me. The way he took care of me, and talked to me about my insecurities and fears is something I will never forget.

  Unfortunately, my good mood went to hell the moment my father called and demanded I meet him and my mother for lunch. He did not sound pleased, so I knew that this meeting was probably going to be more unpleasant than usual.

  When Andrew, my driver, pulls up and lets me out in front of the country club, I take a deep breath and dig deep for courage, knowing I’m going to need it. I’ve decided I’m
going to tell my parents about trying hypnotherapy. The more I think about it, the more I realize that Dr. Ross is right; it’s important I try to find out what caused my disability in the first place. I also know that the more we find out, the more it can also help others in my situation.

  When I walk in, the hostess recognizes me instantly and leads me over to my father’s table in the back corner. My stomach clenches at first glance of my parents. Out of all the people I finally got to see, my parents were the least shocking to me. They look the same as I remember, just a bit older. They’re an attractive looking couple who scream class and wealth, only I know who they are deep down, and there is nothing beautiful about either of them.

  My mother’s disapproving gaze roams over me, most likely not liking my choice of sundress, but she pastes a fake smile on her face before leaning in to kiss my cheek. “Darling, how are you?” she greets for show.

  “I’m doing well, thank you,” I reply quietly.

  My father stands next and leans over to kiss my other cheek, but doesn’t bother with pleasantries. His entire demeanor is colder than usual, so I know he’s really upset about something. The waiter comes over right away, bringing me a mimosa that my parents already took the liberty of ordering for me. I know they will have already ordered my meal too and I’m sure it will be the usual dry salad. My mother’s way of making sure I don’t gain weight.

  My mother starts with small talk, but there is no denying the awkward tension surrounding us. Once our meals are brought and my father knows we won’t be interrupted for a while, he finally brings up what he called me here for. “I spoke with the Rutherfords this morning,” he begins, mentioning friends of theirs who are just as stuck-up as my parents.

  “Oh?” I stare down at my salad, wondering why he thinks I care about this.

  “They were at Crustacia last night for dinner.” My head snaps up and my stomach bottoms out at the silent fury in my father’s eyes. “Who were you with, Emily? It better not be who I’m thinking it is, but from the description Henry gave me it sure sounded like it.”

  I swallow nervously. Don’t show fear, Emily, you have done nothing wrong. “If you are thinking it was Ryder Jameson, then yes, that is who I was with. He’s in town on business and asked me out for dinner.”

  “How dare you speak so blatantly, as if what you have done is okay,” my mother scolds, acting as if I committed murder rather than go out with someone she doesn’t approve of.

  “It’s bad enough you broke the rules, Emily, but to show up at Crustacia with trash like him is unacceptable,” my father berates.

  “He is not trash,” I grind out quietly, “he never has been, and for your information he is doing quite well. He can more than afford to take me somewhere like that.”

  “Really? Is that why he pulled you out of there when your waiter brought your drinks?”

  Those damn nosy Rutherfords. “It wasn’t like that. He didn’t pull me out because he couldn’t afford the bill.” He grunts in disbelief. “It’s true!” I defend loudly.

  “Keep your voice down!” my mother snaps under her breath. “You have humiliated us enough.”

  “It doesn’t matter why he pulled you out of there,” my father starts again. “You are not to see him again while he is here, do you understand me?”

  “I am not a child anymore. You can’t tell me who I can or can not see,” I argue through clenched teeth.

  “That is where you are wrong, Emily. You have a certain obligation to this family and it’s name. Which is why I have arranged for Kyle to accompany you to the Wilmington’s charity dinner tonight.”

  I gape at him, wondering if he’s serious. “You can’t force me to go out with Kyle.”

  “The hell I can’t. You will do this or you will not like the consequences.”

  My blood runs hot at his threat. Before I can argue again, my mother speaks up. “I have to tell you how completely disappointed I am in you, Emily. Kyle has been so kind to you, especially this past month since your sight has come back, and you have been treating him like garbage.”

  “You know how I feel about him, and what he has done to me in the past. Why are you doing this?”

  “Like your father said, you have a certain obligation to this family, and dating people within our social class is one of them. You’re not going to push him away for a piece of trash you spread your legs for when you were seventeen-years-old.”

  My fists clench and my heart pounds with anger. “My rejection of Kyle has nothing to do with Ryder. I have a lot of personal stuff I am dealing with since getting my sight back. I’m not interested in a serious relationship right now.” Which was true – until Ryder returned. But I know the probability of that is slim to none, considering he doesn’t plan to move back. The entire thought has me feeling even more upset.

  “What do you mean you have a lot of personal stuff going on? Has something happened we don’t know about?” my father asks. Most people would think his question is from concern, but it’s not. It has to do with making sure it’s nothing that will embarrass our family’s reputation.

  “I’ve had a lot of adjustments. This hasn’t been easy you know, and…”

  “Oh please, Emily, stop feeling sorry for yourself! I am sick and tired of you being nothing but an embarrassment to this family,” my mother chides, cutting me off.

  Tears begin to blur my eyes, which makes me even more angry. I ignore her cruelty and decide now is a good time to tell them about Dr. Ross. I look only at my father as I speak. “I went and saw my doctor.”

  His eyes narrow in confusion. “What are you talking about? Dr. Shepard never said anything about seeing you.”

  “I didn’t see him. I saw a different doctor. I found him on my own when my sight returned.”

  “What the hell do you mean, you have a doctor of your own? You are only supposed to deal with Dr. Shepard. You know this!” he shouts, getting more upset than I expected.

  “I wanted a second opinion, and Dr. Ross is great. He thinks it’s crucial to my well-being to know what happened all those years ago. He has suggested I try hypnotherapy, and…” My mother gasps and my father’s face drains of color. He looks almost panic-stricken for a moment before complete rage takes over his expression. What on earth?

  “You will do no such thing! Do you hear me?”

  My mother leans over and touches his arm in alarm. “William, keep your voice down. People are staring.”

  I stare back at my father’s enraged face, not believing how upset he is over this. “I don’t understand why you are getting so angry. Dr. Ross thinks this is a good thing for my mental health.”

  “The man is clearly an idiot!”

  “You don’t even know him.”

  “I only work with the best, which is why Dr. Shepard works for me.” I shake my head and am about to interrupt but my father doesn’t let me. “I’m serious, Emily, this nonsense stops right now. You will not see that Doctor again, there will be no hypnotherapy, and you sure as hell will not be seeing that piece of trash again.” I stand up, refusing to listen to this crap for another second. “Sit down now!” The low warning in my father’s voice along with the fury in his expression has a shiver of apprehension running down my spine. I have dealt with his anger before, but never anything like this.

  “No, I won’t,” I whisper shakily, trying to hold on to my courage. “I am tired of you dictating every single aspect of my life. I’m tired of never being good enough. From now on I am choosing what is right for myself, not what you think is right for the family name. And until you can respect that then don’t contact me again!” Turning, I rush out of the restaurant before they can stop me. As soon as I get outside I see Andrew waiting for me but I walk past him, not trusting where I will end up if I let him take me.

  “Miss Michaels, where are you going?”

  Ignoring his question, I quicken my stride and turn the corner. I search for a taxi, but there isn’t one in sight. Worrying about Andrew coming to find
me, I rush into one of the shops, and the smell of coffee immediately penetrates my senses. I take in my surroundings and quickly realize I’m in a cafe. Swiping at the tears streaking down my cheeks, I go take a seat by the window and pull out my cell. I speak into the mic, asking for it to call Cece. When I get her answering machine right away I worry her phone is turned off. I try again, only to get the same thing.

  “Shit!” I mutter, my panic escalating, wondering how I’ll get home. The country club isn’t close to where I live. I think about calling Rosa but remember her telling me last night that she had a full day planned with friends, and I do not want to ruin it for her. Staring at my phone, I call the only other person I can think of who will help me. My heart pounds wildly as it rings, praying he picks up.

  “Jameson.”

  “Ryder?” I whisper, sounding as distressed as I feel.

  “Emily, what’s wrong?”

  “I’m really sorry to bother you, but can you pick me up? I just had a horrible lunch with my parents and I have stranded myself. I don’t know my way home and I tried Cece, but…”

  “Where are you?” he asks, cutting me off. I hear scuffling in the background as if he’s already moving.

  “By the country club at a coffee shop. Umm,” I look around trying to figure out the name, “hold on.” I walk over to a group of girls sitting at a table not far from me. “Excuse me, could you please tell me the name of this place?”

  They look at me in annoyance and I realize my mistake too late. The blonde one picks up the small sign that sits in the center of their table. “Um, how about you read the fucking sign, idiot. ‘That’s A-r-o-m-a’,” she replies slowly, making me feel stupid. They all laugh, finding the situation hilarious.

  I walk away and try to speak past the humiliation clogging my throat. “I’m…”

  “I fucking know where you are. I’ll be there in less than ten minutes. Don’t move!” he barks furiously, clearly hearing everything that was said, which only makes me feel worse.