Growing Up Gronk: A Familys Story of Raising Champions
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Away from the baseball diamond, success in academics began to take root. He had started his college career at Jacksonville as a walk-on, receiving no scholarship. Because his father was a successful businessman, there was no financial aid either. Attending college cost $23,000 per year.
“My dad cut a deal with me,” Gordie said. “If I got a three-point-oh, he would pay for half my schooling. But I battled in the classroom just to be a B student. I don’t have the intelligence that my brothers Chris or Danny have. They’re very book smart, but I’m better talking to people.”
During his first and second years at college, Gordie did not reach the 3.0 benchmark, and he lamented his growing debt. But in his junior year, he finally earned that grade, and his father made good on the promise. Also, because of his strong play on the baseball diamond, Gordie received a partial academic scholarship. Financially, attending college became less stressful. Now it was time to prove it on the baseball diamond.
“I had a solid junior season,” he said. “I hit three thirty-three, which is pretty good, and had an on-base percentage of over four hundred. I was hoping to hear my name get called in the draft, but nothing happened. I wondered what I needed to do to get drafted. I think my back surgery scared a lot of teams away.”
In the summer of 2005, Gordie returned to the Torrington Twisters for summer ball, where he batted over .300 again. During his senior year at Jacksonville, the numbers became even more impressive: a batting average of .370, ten home runs, and seventy RBIs.
“He had a great senior year,” said Alexander, the coach at Jacksonville. “To put it in perspective, I had two players on that team who were first-team all-conference players, one of whom, Daniel Murphy, was player of the year and is in the big leagues now with the Mets. Yet Gordie was the MVP on our team. Without a doubt, he was the leader of the club. He was good in the locker room and carried himself well. He had a lot to do with our winning the championship that year.”
There was a lighthearted side to Gordie as well. His coach recalled that Gordie often did not understand his own strength.
“He’d hit a home run and give someone a high-five and just about knock the guy’s shoulder out of its socket,” Alexander said. “People started elbow-bumping him because otherwise they wouldn’t be able to play the next day. Gordie didn’t mean to, but he was like a big Labrador retriever who got so excited.”
After another championship ring, Gordie believed he would be drafted.
“After the season, I talked to scouts, filled out forms, received a stack of letters,” he said. “All indications were I’d be drafted in the middle rounds, somewhere between twenty and thirty. It’s strange, but my mindset changed after the surgery. I just wanted to finish college and have a chance to play.”
In 2006, Gordie earned a business degree from Jacksonville. That June, he watched the baseball draft on TV at his friend’s house, growing more frustrated as each team passed him by. Thirty-two teams each draft fifty rounds, hoping to stock their rosters with talent. With each passing team, Gordie heard a different name than his. Round thirty-five came and went. Then forty. Then forty-five.
“That’s when I left the room,” Gordie said. “My buddy told me that I just got drafted in the forty-ninth round. My dad was the first one to phone. Five minutes later I got a call from the Los Angeles Angels’ recruiting director.”
Baseball insiders confirm that Gordie’s back problems were a red flag to professional teams.
“Most teams are going to shy away from a back problem,” Alexander said. “Back problems are the main reason why Gordie isn’t playing in games that are on TV.”
As part of his path to the major league, Gordie traveled to Orem, Utah, and played eight games for the Orem Owlz.
“We drafted Gordie and he did very well for us,” said Tom Kotchman, a longtime scout for the Los Angeles Angels who works out of Florida. His son, Casey, is a star first baseman who played the 2011 season with the Tampa Bay Rays. “Gordie is a big target at first base. He’s imposing, and he hits with power.”
Kotchman also coaches young men who sign into the organization, so he was familiar with Gordie both on and off the field.
“Gordie was a fifth-year senior, which means he was twenty-two or twenty-three when he came to us, so he was a year or two older than some of the other kids. Because of his size and ability, he was a perfect guy to have on the club. He was a leader by example. He was a great role model for other kids to follow on how to act like a professional. Probably the hardest thing for him was taking bus rides, because when you’re that size, you don’t easily fit in those rows. At six six, that was tough.”
Batting at .287 in Orem, Gordie was just finding a rhythm when his back went out.
“We were playing in Casper, Wyoming, and the owner flew me back in his private plane,” Gordie said. “I was done for the season. I figured they were going to let me go, but I did rehab for three or four hours each day, working my abs, spending time in the pool. I worked my ass off, hoping to get another opportunity.”
It came the following season, when he returned to Orem. During spring training, he was on an extended plan where he did not draw a paycheck but remained on the bench, hoping to be moved into the lineup. Shortly, he had earned his way back to a roster spot, and his game returned to the level he anticipated.
“This was the best time of my life,” Gordie recalled. “I hit three forty-four that season, was top five in every category, and my back was one hundred percent. I played first base and batted fourth. We won it all that year, and it was my first minor-league ring. I had a big role on that team and it was unbelievable to be part of something again. Having worked through that adversity, it was a great feeling.”
The following season Gordie started playing Single A baseball in Cedar Rapids, Iowa, the affiliate for the Los Angeles Angels. With a cold and rainy start to the season, his back grew tight, flaring again. He hit .220, the worst of his career, and after three months of rehab, was released.
“That’s how it all ended, but I thanked everyone I ever worked with,” he said. “They did not have to give me a chance to rehab, to pay me to get healthy and live my life. I ended up playing another three years of professional independent ball, but I never had another chance to be picked up by the major league.”
In 2009, Gordie played in Avon, Ohio, outside Cleveland, for the Lake Erie Crushers of the Frontier League. He was named team captain.
“I had never played close to home before, so that was great,” he reflected. “There were twelve teams in the league, and all the others were established. We were a first-year club that won it all. I got another fat ring for that.”
The following summer, he was traded to Worcester, Massachusetts, located near Foxborough. Worcester was interested in Gordie for an obvious marketing connection: little brother Rob had just been drafted by the New England Patriots, and by all accounts Rob was going to be a star.
“They thought the name recognition was a reason to bring me in,” Gordie explained. “But it was a very different experience. Their field was at Holy Cross. All the players lived in a huge dorm room that was like a frat hole. The guys on that team were with each other day and night. I was used to staying with a host family and having time to myself. Also, I wasn’t playing that much.”
The team’s coach, Rich Gedman, had been a catcher for the Boston Red Sox. He admitted to Gordie that other teams had inquired about adding him to their roster.
“Gedman was straight-up honest with me, which I liked,” Gordie said. “He thought I should be playing somewhere instead of sitting on the bench. So I was traded to Gateway, outside St. Louis, for the second half of the season.”
From there the moves came fast and furious. Gateway traded Gordie back to Worcester, which then shipped him out for a second stint in Lake Erie. The Crushers waited until the off-season to send him to Southern Illinois, where he played the 2011 season.
By September 2011, Gordie believed his career had come to a
close.
“Truth is, I enjoyed independent ball. It’s only ninety games, whereas in the minor leagues you’re playing a hundred and fifty or sixty. Ninety games in a hundred days was perfect for my back.”
Despite Gordie’s claims that he is done with professional baseball at twenty-eight, his father wonders if the final chapter has been written on his son’s athletic achievements.
“Gordie has a great story,” his father claimed proudly. “It’s a shame he had to have back surgery. He did everything he had to do to be successful. He never quit, just kept going and going.”
“An injury like that can’t help your career,” said Kotchman, the Angels’ scout and coach at Orem. “For sports like baseball or golf, you’re supplying a lot of torque there. That’s tough, especially when you’re Gordie’s size.”
Glenn Gronkowski, speaking about his nephew and brother, reflected on the big picture.
“I always pictured Gordie a little like his father,” he said. “Gordie was kind of the goof-off type. Then I went to one of his college baseball games and he had gotten so much better. I don’t know why he never got a legit tryout after he was drafted. I don’t understand the politics behind baseball. When I saw him playing outside Cleveland, he was batting over three hundred. That kid had a wicked stick. He sure could put the ball over the fence.”
Kotchman has overseen the development of many young men over the years, but Gordie remains memorable for more than his achievements in baseball.
“Gordie is someone you’ll never forget,” Kotchman said. “Guys with his makeup stand out. You never had to worry about Gordie on or off the field. He always dressed well and spoke well and presented himself professionally. I didn’t have anything to do with that. That’s just the way he was. Gordie will be successful in whatever he decides to do. He’ll be a leader in life.”
Although his sport of choice was different from that of his four brothers, Gordie believes that he set a standard for the younger boys to follow.
“Even though I didn’t go the football route, I think my experiences made it easier for my brothers to leave home when the time came,” he mused. “Now that it looks like baseball is done, people ask how I feel. I feel great. I’m the only brother in the world who can say he has three younger brothers playing in the NFL. My littlest brother is going to Kansas State on a full scholarship and maybe heading to the NFL, so someday soon there may be four. I’m their biggest fan.”
Competition, however, still runs deep in the family roots. As he finished eating the chicken soufflé he laid down his fork and leaned forward.
“Just make sure to mention that I have more rings than all my brothers combined,” Gordie said with a grin. “I have four. Two from college, one from my first year in pro ball, and another from my first year in independent ball. So I must have done something right along the way.”
Rob’s bandage—“Hard Work”—says it all.
Dan, Rob, Chris, and their father check out the Wall of Fame in their high school’s weight room, 2012.Photo by Jeff Schober
5
Mental Toughness
“More than anything, mentality and the approach to preparation are the keys to making it.”
—DEMERIS JOHNSON, TRAINER AND FORMER NFL PLAYER
TALK TO ANY OF THE Gronkowskis, and the phrase “mental toughness” is routinely repeated. Gordie described the behind-the-scenes preparation required to be a great baseball player. Dan echoed those sentiments regarding football and mentioned there was some indefinable factor that the brothers each possess.
“We were blessed with our size,” Dan mused, “and obviously something went on in the house where we’re all mentally tough.”
Their father trained his boys to follow the golden rule but to do so with a stubborn streak.
“I instilled in all my kids that you never quit,” Gordy said. “If you start something in life, you have to finish it. When they were young, my boys were on teams where they would come home and complain that they didn’t like it. Well, guess what? You finish it. They would say that they didn’t like the coach. I told them, so what? You finish it. You’re going to meet people in life you don’t like, but part of being successful is that you work around it.”
Being a former NFL player himself, Demeris Johnson immediately recognized traits in the Gronkowski brothers that could lead to athletic accomplishment. They possessed physical gifts but also had the proper mindset for success.
As a trainer, Johnson has developed a keen eye for temperament and talent. During their initial workouts together in the summer of 2002, Johnson knew he was dealing with special players.
“I can’t say whether an athlete will make it to the big time or not, because there are so many determining factors in that,” he reflected. “But what I do recognize—and I can pick it up like that—is whether a kid has what it takes to make it. I can tell if a boy has the potential to make it. When I saw Robbie, I recognized he had the potential to be the best tight end in the nation.”
What makes the difference between an average athlete and an elite athlete?
“More than anything, mentality and the approach to preparation are the keys to making it,” Johnson said. “A lot of kids don’t understand that. Their father had already done a wonderful job in giving them the mentality they needed to prepare for greatness. Once I saw that, it was easy. I just had to apply the methodology.”
Gordy reflected on the way he raised his sons.
“I preached motivational skills all the time. If you’re motivated and keep driving at something, then everything good will happen.”
The refrigerator remains the central appliance in the Gronkowski home. When all the boys lived under one roof, the weekly food bill exceeded $600. The refrigerator door was opened and closed more times than anyone can count. Gordy knew this was one spot where his sons focused their attention. So he taped inspirational quotes there, knowing every time a growing palm was laid against its handle, his boys would be unwittingly exposed to a burst of wisdom.
One of Gordy’s favorites, saved over the years: “Teamwork is the most important concept in sports. Together everyone achieves more. The true team has trust, love, commitment, and belief in one another.”
And, from UCLA basketball coach John Wooden: “Ability may get you to the top. But it takes character to keep you there.”
“That whole refrigerator was coated with quotes,” Gordy said. “Every little space was filled. If I stumbled across something good when I was reading, I put the quote up there. I also added articles where people did something stupid . . . pro athletes whose career ended over stupidity. The message was: Don’t be this guy. Don’t do this. You’re no better than anybody else. Don’t start thinking you are. You’ve just been gifted with different traits than others. I preached and preached that.”
Gordy knew he went overboard when the boys complained they were tired of another new quote on the refrigerator door.
“I reached a point where I was probably overdoing it,” Gordy said with a laugh. “But something must have worked, because all the boys have become successful in their own right. Even now, Goose still has a couple of them taped to the wall in his bedroom.”
Toughness is a common strand in their family lore.
“I don’t know if I should tell this story,” Gordy admitted. “But one time when they were kids, Danny came home from school upset because there was a bully picking on him on the bus.”
Diane, the boys’ mother, listened with concern, then instructed her son to alert the bus driver if the bullying happened again. Gordy grew quiet, waiting until his wife had left the room to call his boys over. He asked Gordie if he had been there when his younger brother was picked on. Gordie admitted timidly that he had.
“You’re family,” Gordy told the two boys, using thick fingers to punctuate his words. “You need to jump in and protect one another. If this kid does it again tomorrow, you both jump in and beat the living shit out of him.”
Years later
, Gordy remembers the difficult instructions he gave his sons.
“Maybe that wasn’t the right way to do it. But in my opinion that was the right thing to do at the time. I don’t take crap from anybody, and I didn’t want my boys to either. I taught them not to start trouble but not to take it either. Treat people the way you want to be treated. I bring up the word ‘karma’ all the time. If you screw people or steal from others, it’s going to come back to bite you three times harder. My boys learned to do it the right way, and they won’t have problems.”
“Professional athletes are really good at kicking themselves in the butt,” said Bill Cole, a mental-game coach based in Cupertino, California, near San Jose. “Professional athletes have a sense of sacrifice and can push themselves to do things when they don’t want to. There are many guys with the same physical ability who just don’t have the drive.”
Originally from Western New York, Cole has worked for nearly three decades as a sports-psychology consultant. An acclaimed tennis star himself, Cole is a nationally recognized expert on the mindset of athletes and successful nonathletes. He is the founder and president of the International Mental Game Coaching Association, an organization dedicated to advancing research, development, and growth of mental-game coaching worldwide. He is also the author of numerous books and more than four hundred articles on the subject. He has encountered a wide variety of athletes over a thirty-year professional span.
“A lot of times people reach Division One or the pro level from a war of attrition,” he noted. “They don’t quit. Other people may have more talent than a pro but didn’t want to tolerate the malarkey that goes along with it. They get tired of traveling. They don’t like coaches yelling at them. They want to settle down and have a family. There are a host of reasons that a person can lose the motivation to deny himself. You could almost argue that someone has to be fanatical to reach the upper level of sports.”