Love and Death in Blue Lake

by Cynthia Harrison

  “Do you believe me? Or do you just wanna do it?”

  Lily’s voice sounded as if she’d chugged a bottle of wine in six minutes. Her neck was at an odd angle, but she didn’t seem uncomfortable. He moved her head onto his shoulder and held her there, feeling like he was literally holding her together.

  “No, honey.” He kissed her forehead. “I got a buddy, he told me you could add a bottle of water into the brake fluid, and the heat would do something to make it sink down below the fluid and evaporate, but not before it rendered the fluid ineffective. By the time the cops show up, the water is gone. No evidence. Unless a really good inspector catches it. Sometimes they do and sometimes they don’t.”

  Like a beautiful doll come to life, Lily reanimated.

  “Well, this inspector is best friends with my cousin, so I’m thinking he didn’t notice a thing.” She climbed on top of him like he was a mountain. Moving slow. The vodka. But she smiled when she felt how hard he was for her. She rubbed against him, and he moaned. The thin cloth of that last layer between them tormented his entire being. Her head fell against his pillow; her lips touched his ear. She let out a giant snore.

  Bob sighed, carefully cradled her in his arms, put her in a comfortable position on her own pillow, then covered her with the light summer blanket. He got out of bed and dressed. He sat on the edge of the bed watching her sleep for a long while, then finally, when he was sure she’d be okay, because she tossed and turned and snored and muttered in her sleep, he went home.

  He got in his car and drove and as the radio blasted out “I Bet My Life” he wondered, could what they’d come up with—this crazy scenario—be true? Or were they both just spinning stories? And what about her plan with the gun and the filming? She’d need a second person. Was all this just a plan to seduce and enlist him? And would it work? He just didn’t know. And he didn’t know anyone he could ask. Unless.

  He didn’t know where else to go, so he turned in when he got to Fast Eddie’s place. The neon light that shone down from the top of the barn-like structure when the bar was open was dark. The smaller neon light with the same hot pink and blue colors as the big sign when it was turned on, the one that said OPEN, was also dark.

  Bob checked the dash clock. Yeah, the place had been closed for hours. The sun would be coming up any minute. He made a fist with his hand and took knuckles to his stiff neck. Too long sitting staring at one place, one woman. He used to think that when he built his first house, he’d become a man. Now he knew he’d only really be a man when he saw Lily through this mess. The gun. The confession. He had to step up. And he had to do it alone. She was the only woman in the world he’d do something like this for—it wasn’t about sex—it was about protecting the woman he loved.

  Chapter Three

  Courtney stood on the sidewalk lacing up her walking shoes, thinking about Edward and how they’d left things this morning. It had all gone from wonderful and impossible to just sucking in minutes. She was confused and sad. The shrink needed some therapy, but all she could think to do was undress and wrap herself in her soft childhood blanket. She slept for several hours, the jet lag catching up with her, then had dinner with the family before deciding to take a solo walk around her old neighborhood.

  She passed Doc’s old house, so many memories of cuts and bruises and once or twice a broken bone being set in his house, which had also been his office. A For Sale sign was hammered into the lawn and by the looks of it, had been there awhile. Not many people wanted a big red-brick four square. Most new buyers liked the cozy 1950s cottages. This was a place for a family. Her family.

  With Courtney, it was all about following her strong intuition. Every good move she’d made had been through her own actions. Every bad move had been instigated by someone else. Like when Xander had showed up on her doorstep and moved right in without even asking. She’d been flattered at first, grateful for the companionship second, and then just sort of settled in. But it had been wrong. It had not been her choice; it had been his. She could fix that. It was time. In fact, well overdue. Even if she just kept this place for a vacation spot, a get-away, just stayed the summer, she wanted it. She had her own money, and the San Diego house was a rental. She wanted a home. Here. Now. It felt right.

  Even though it was way late, the sun had not quite set, so Courtney took out her phone and called the Realtor.

  He apparently wasn’t too busy because he came right over with a key.

  She had no idea what she was doing, but in her mind she thought about color and chintz and decorative touches like carved cornice boards that would make the Bryman school of architecture, even Bob with his glass and open design, gasp. Courtney loved color; it made her happy. And stars knew she needed some happy.

  “Is it okay to videotape you? I’m trying to get historic footage to include in the reunion video.” These words startled Courtney, and she turned to spy a wisp of a girl who appeared out of nowhere the minute the Realtor—“Call me Spence”—showed up with the key to Doc’s place.

  Spence the Realtor, no last names needed in Blue Lake, Courtney remembered, gave the girl with the video camera an aggrieved look. Then he said to Courtney, “Daniel Bryman said she could follow people around a little bit if she wasn’t too intrusive.” He gave the girl one more hard look, which she ignored, filming away. Courtney shrugged. Permission granted.

  “Doc died ten years ago.” Spence got out the key and unlocked the door, blocking the threshold. “His kids kept this as a summer place until a year or two ago.” Spence pointed out the diamond windowpanes and the mellowed timber porch. Courtney loved it. It cast a spell on her. She was too old to be a princess, but she felt enchanted. How would Ruby feel? Well, as she’d rationalized, they didn’t have to stay. Not forever. Not right now. But this would be her refuge. Waiting for her whenever she wanted it, even if that was not until Ruby was in college.

  “You interested in using this as a residence or a commercial property?” Spence the Realtor asked.

  “Both. Maybe. I’m not sure.”

  “So you’re a doctor?” They had gone through the big foyer with the staircase into the front parlor. Pocket doors sealed the room from the family’s domain. She didn’t need medical doctor stuff in here and pictured a library office with bookshelves behind a sofa and comfortable chairs and her desk. Through the pocket doors, in what could be a dining room, she’d make a cozy family space with a television set where she and Ruby could watch movies and the baby could play. They crossed to the kitchen. An old farmhouse sink was still there, but nothing else. Lots of room for a dine-in kitchen table. A blank palette. Her favorite thing. Light slanted in the windows.

  “So what kind of doctor?” Spence asked.

  “Cognitive and behavioral therapist.”

  “No shit!” The video girl put her camera down. “I could use an emergency appointment.”

  Courtney snapped out of her whatever it was, some kind of dream where she stayed in Blue Lake and practiced in this house. Just to see what would happen with Edward. That fast, everything seemed over with Xander. Her life was moving at warp speed. She had her first patient but hadn’t even been licensed by the state yet.

  She told the girl that.

  “Could we just have coffee? I’m away from my shrink for the first time in five years, doing this job, and I really, really, really need advice. No meds, just someone to talk to. Cognitive therapy. That’s talk, right?”

  “Right.” Courtney saw the way the young girl’s hands shook.

  “Please. Oh, I’m Lily. You can ask the Brymans about me.” The Brymans were the town’s most prominent family and good friends with Courtney’s folks. “They know me. I used to work for them…”

  Spence took Courtney’s elbow. “Young lady, get your footage, and then you and my client can talk after she’s seen the rest of the house.”

  They did a walk through of the upper floors, and the house was a solid Bryman structure. The first Bryman had been an architect who designed m
any of the historic homes in the town. It had been built in the 1930s, and like so many of the homes in this town, by one of their own, only recently brought to national prominence by the youngest generation of Brymans. There would be no need for repairs or retrofitting. Ruby’s room, nursery, her bedroom. The bathroom had a gorgeous Victorian tub and a pedestal sink. Perfect. God, this was confusing, but some parts were very clear. She wanted this house. She’d hire someone to watch the baby in between clients. Keep her list low.

  There had been moments in Courtney’s life, not many, but a few, where suddenly a light showed her a path, and it was clear and certain. This was one such moment. She felt dazed by the clarity of it. This was her home. She was sure of it.

  It was very close to move-in ready and decorating would be a pleasure. “I’ll take it.” Courtney heard herself say the words, but she didn’t quite believe them. She’d have to ask her mom for a down payment unless Spence would take an out-of-state check. She realized with a jolt that her lease was up on the San Diego house next month. Just another sign. Xander did not approve of “signs” or anything else smacking of the Jungian. Well, too bad. She didn’t have to live with his silent disapproval anymore.

  Spence gave her his card, and she promised to come by his office in a few hours. She felt happy, then terrified, like she’d been in a car crash and hit in the head by an air bag and pink fairy dust was flying in the air all around her. But it felt so right, she refused to worry.

  Lily sat cross legged on the wood floor, waiting. When he learned who her folks were, and had scanned her license and credit card, Spence had given Courtney the key. He shut the door behind him and Lily said, “I’m going out of my skin.”

  Thank stars for yoga, Courtney thought, lowering herself to the floor across from Lily. “We’re just talking. This is not a session.”

  “I don’t care about that. I need to unload, you’re qualified, hell you just bought your office. Should I put that in the video?”

  “I don’t know.” Courtney tried to bring herself out of the pleasant daydream daze and into a more professional persona, but it just wasn’t happening. “I guess that would be okay.”

  “I’ll interview you for the reunion video later. First I have to tell you what happened to me and my mom. My thing happened a long time ago and I had a ton of therapy about it, was getting over it a little bit, but then the same guy who raped me just killed my mom, like at Christmastime. Last year. And nobody, not even my Dad, believes me. Also, he’s my cousin. The murderer.”

  ****

  Lily left Dr. Fass in a great mood Thursday night and woke up Friday morning feeling fine. In a way, Lily felt like a spy. Her life was something she preferred to keep blank, all the easier to fall into other people’s stories. Now she had a story, and it was a nightmare. So she was taking a little break from it to film this reunion, and bam, she meets a therapist. The perfect therapist. It was like when she met Bob. When she met Dean. Everything was working, for now. She just had to keep it together until she could execute her plan.

  Fast Eddie from the bar had agreed to let her film his hermit cave. Because of the Bob connection. A total honor. The therapist had the same last name as Eddie. Were they cousins? Married? Dr. Fass did not wear a wedding ring. Lily had checked the footage before she began filming the Sapphire River. She’d never even known it was back here. The big lake was the main attraction, unless you knew about the Sapphire. It was wide and high, and its waves chopped and churned.

  Eddie had promised to meet her, and she kept filming the water until she heard his truck turn up the road. She had a mystery to unravel. The mystery of the Fass connection.

  “We need to do this fast. I have a business to run.” Eddie was already at the door, letting her into the glass house. Oh well, she could shoot exteriors afterward.

  “Hey, you know what’s funny?”

  He seemed not to hear her.

  “I just had an appointment last night with a Dr. Fass. Are you related?”

  “Courtney?”

  Lily shrugged. “Yeah, I guess. You related?”

  “We used to date in high school.”

  She filmed the downstairs, all one big room. All glass. Big panes of glass. Bob was amazing. If only she could love him the way people in songs loved each other. Body and soul. Some kind of magic spark. But she loved him like a brother. She’d never loved anyone any other way than the way she loved her mom. And her dad, when he was still Papa. And Dean. Dean she loved like a dad, but Dean was gone now. Or she was gone. She wouldn’t go back to the college town in southwest Michigan. What for? She had a new therapist right here. And this therapist would teach her how to love Bob properly.

  Eddie walked up the stairs, so she followed, wondering how to ask him for help. She had a feeling Bob would need a backup. Someone older and smart. Like Dean, but she wouldn’t ask Dean. They’d said their good-byes, and she had to stop relying on him. It was time.

  “You two seeing each other again?” She couldn’t bring herself to ask for help. Not yet. She had to do this reunion job first, then take care of her personal shit. High school sweethearts reunited. Would make a good story for the video. Eddie had always liked her, calling her Ms. Lily when she was just a girl, only seventeen, and blew into town on her way to somewhere else, destination unknown. She liked that sense with her work too—who knew what she’d uncover? This was her prelude to uncovering a murderer.

  For the video’s sake, she would find out the real story of Eddie the mystery man, and why he and Courtney had broken up, and how they got back together. Because of course they would. They didn’t just date. They must have been married to have the same last name. And Dr. Fass had not changed hers, so she never remarried. Made a nice little happy ending for the reunion video. Her next video shoot, the one featuring her cousin, would not have such a happy ending, but she was okay with that.

  She filmed the top floor of the engineering marvel Bob had designed. She interviewed Eddie, who’d had his hair trimmed for the special weekend. Maybe for Dr. Fass. She didn’t ask, but she left her camera on after she set it up on the tripod, filming the inch of white that showed where Eddie’s neck now met his hair.

  She adored that the only sound was the whoosh of the river rushing into the background. The woods surrounding Eddie’s property created a layer of hush. It felt like church.

  Eddie made sure her lens took note of all the signature Bryman touches, updated for a new century and Bob’s particular vision. Like her, Bob already had a vision.

  “What would it look like in a storm like the one the other night?”

  “Saw some lightning streak across the sky when I got home from the bar.” Eddie pointed up at the skylights.

  Lily dutifully aimed her lens up. Bob’s design just kept on impressing her. She didn’t know enough about his vocation. Guys liked when you asked them questions about themselves. Right? Bob. He wasn’t just any guy. Her heart hurt. It felt like the organ, just a thing that kept her alive, wanted to escape her body and search him out. It yearned toward him. Snap out of it, she told herself.

  Maybe she was in love with Bob. If that was true, love and work just didn’t mix. All the more reason to work up her nerve and ask Eddie for help.

  She looked for clues to unlock his cooperation, but there was nothing to see, not even behind her camera. A bed. A table with nothing on it but a lamp and an iPad. That was it. A walled off space running the length of the room was off limits, he said. “My closet. My bathroom.” That’s all he let her in on. She was intrigued by the things inside drawers. Inside backpacks. Inside medicine cabinets.

  She’d missed the telescope at one of the windows. Filmed that. Okay, three pieces of furniture, four if you count the lamp. This guy took minimalism seriously. She put her camera down and peeked into the telescope. She saw the village of cottages and then, closer to the water, the bigger Bryman homes in the rich section of town, where Courtney’s family lived. She saw the canoe rental place closer up and the empty acreag
e that went on and on because it was not on the water, but across from it. She saw the Sapphire like a ribbon running through it all.

  She filmed for two hours but was not satisfied. She wanted behind the bedroom door. Maybe his guitar was in there. Everyone talked about how he once had a shot, how he wrote such great songs. Bingo, bet he wrote them for Dr. Fass, bet he stopped when she left him. Why did she leave him? Lily would find out. She wanted to disappear into their story and leave hers behind, if only for a little while.

  She reminded herself she wasn’t ready to speak to Eddie about her problem just yet. First, she had to talk Bob into helping her. Then, together, they could convince Eddie that nobody would get hurt if they did it right. But Bob might need a lot of convincing himself. And she would need a lot of therapy in order to do that part of it. Okay, first things first. Did she need to make a list? Mind on job. This job, not the next one.

  ****

  Spence said he’d rather have a check written from the local bank. He also said he could not move a sale as quickly as she’d requested, but he had permission to execute a temporary “rent to own” so she could move in anytime. Courtney’s mother handed over the money, no questions asked, huge smile giving away her happiness. Courtney, still in a state of disbelief in her actions, went to the bank and deposited the money. Then she went to the real estate office in town and signed the papers. Edward was coming out of the dry cleaner, pressed checked shirts slung over one shoulder. He looked up at the sign, although everyone knew Sanchez’s was next to the real estate office and always had been.

  “Buying property?”

  Suddenly she felt dizzy and clutched a lamp post. What would it mean to say yes, what would then come after? She’d been gone too long. This was not her home anymore. She loved her life exactly as it had been. Before Edward kissed her. Hadn’t she?

  He was at her side in two steps, his hand cupping her elbow.

  “You okay?”

  “I bought Doc’s old place. I might be losing my mind.”