Law slapped me on the chest. “Dude did you just rename your step-sister?”
I looked at him and his eyes were smiling at me, fucking weirdo. “Her cheeks are rosy so she looks like a Scarlet.”
My father smiled at me as well.
“What?!”
My dad chuckled. “Looks like your pending fatherhood is messing with your brain cells son.”
“Whatever. What are we going to do? She looks like she’s on drugs or some shit.”
“I could call my mom and see if she could stay at her house, but Unk you’d have to stay with her. I’m not suggesting it unless you’re with her at all times. She’d probably sell off all my mom’s shit.”
My dad thought about it for a few seconds before he responded. “No son, I can’t do that to Layla. She’d kill us all for suggesting it. I’ll take her for now. I have a place nearby that I rented when I got back just in case the house wouldn’t be ready. I’ll take her and the baby…Scarlet. Come on, it’s getting late.”
I let my dad and Law walk back to the group of women eyeing each other. I wanted to walk back to take one last peek at Scarlet, but I refused to let myself do that.
When Sabrina took her baby back, Liv looked wounded. She didn’t want to let go and I understood why. That baby needed a good mother and Liv could be that for her, so could Blue. But instead, she was stuck with a crazy woman not worthy of a baby as perfect as her.
Liv’s head turned around searching for me. When she found me, she smiled through the pain she was feeling. She walked over to me and I watched the potbelly growing in her midsection as her hips moved from side to side fluidly with each step in her kickass high-tops.
I pulled her into me when she was at arm’s length, holding her close. “Thank you Liv for saving me out here. You’ll see her again don’t worry. I got your message and I see the picture loud and clear baby.”
She reached her arms around my neck, pulling my face down. With her lips pressed against mine she laughed, “About damn time.”
I kissed her gently, pulling back to stare into her eyes that owned my soul. I heard my dad’s truck engine start and pull away.
Law came over to us with Blue wrapped up in his arms. “I’m going to park Sabrina’s car out back. See you two love birds at home.”
I looked my cousin…brother in the eye, holding his attention. “Thank you Law.”
“Yeah man, no problem. That’s what family’s for, right?”
“Right.” Liv answered for me.
“Come on baby. Let’s get my babies home.” She practically dragged me to the car. “Oo, I’m craving Italian can we do curb side pickup at Carraba’s? Please Ocean please.” She pouted and stomped her feet like a little kid.
I laughed at her silly ways because she should know by now that begging wasn’t necessary but I played into it every time. “Naw baby, let’s go home. I want you to cook for me. I love your food and the way you dance when you cook makes me hard as fuck.” I winked at her as I licked my bottom lip.
The one’s she constantly accuses me of stealing from Tom Hardy…fuck him!
She stilled, cocking her head to the side, pushing out her bottom lip. “Don’t make me pull out the pregnant card out this early in the game Ocean!”
I opened her door, shoving her gently inside and ignoring her. When I took my seat in my Range, I started the car and sped out as fast as I could. She opened her mouth to speak, but I clapped my hand over her mouth.
“I know Twizzlers, raisins, whip cream, and strawberries.”
She ran her tongue on the inside of my hand and I pulled my hand away, wiping my palm on the side of her head.
She slapped my hand away all dramatic and shit. “What the hell are the strawberries and whip cream for?”
“Use your imagination baby, but if you are the type to suffer from the lack of imagination; which my dick finds extremely hard to believe. No pun intended. The whip cream is to outline your breasts, nipples and the inside of your thighs for my so called Tom Hardy lips to suck off you. The strawberries are for you to eat while I eat you.” She was quiet for a few seconds.
“Ocean?”
“Yes Liv.”
“Can you stop by Boston Market then? It’s closer and a neighborhood Walmart is around the corner; that way we’ll get home faster and if you laugh at what I just said, I’ll punch you in the throat with my good hand.”
I saluted her, stepping on the gas to get her food, our sex game snacks, and home for the game of thrones to begin in our bedroom.
Chapter Thirteen
Lawrence
I turned off the shower; the water had been running ice cold for at least twenty minutes or so. I stepped out of the shower, grabbing my towel and wrapping it around my hips loosely.
Walking over to the fogged up mirror, I swiped a band of fog clear and revealing my reflection beneath it. As I looked into my reflection, I smiled at the sexy son of a bitch staring back at me.
Fuck Blue’s right. I do resemble Chris Evans…HELL NO, I’M PRETTIER!
I chuckled to myself just for the hell of it.
It surprised me I could still crack a smile and laugh at myself. I had absolutely no reason to feel so helpless and lost but I wasn’t used to complicated shit getting even more sick, twisted, and painful. I was always good after breaking someone’s nose during times like these, but this was so different.
I looked down at my wedding band on my ring finger. Lawrence Nathaniel Hawthorne was fucking married! I married the first and only woman placed on this earth that was capable of ripping out my heart and soul, tear them to unsalvageable shreds, and within an annoying eye roll put the pieces back together perfectly.
Shit. Life was more than good. Blue was everything I knew and didn’t know I wanted. It wasn’t the possibility of her not being able to give birth that haunted my every sleeping and waking moment. What was torturing me was the fact that Blue suffered in silence. She endured unbearable things and it fucking hurt me to know that I was enjoying life to the fullest in every aspect while she suffered alone.
Every time I stepped one-foot out the front door, I was scared that we would run into her stepfather and that piece of shit scumbag. I was afraid because without remorse I would kill them both without a care, worry, or second thought I would end their miserable existence.
I grabbed my toothbrush to brush my teeth in the attempt to change my train of thought…did not work.
When I opened the bathroom door, my eyes easily rested on Blue’s body lying peacefully under the cotton covers. I was shocked I still had balls because for the past few days I’ve twisted her sexy, flexible, and extremely powerful body in sex positions I myself have never seen in Kama sutra books. She took me like the feline she was and savored every inch of our painful pleasure.
The time was two in the morning and I was exhausted, but sleep was nowhere written on the back of my eyelids. I pulled off my towel drying my hair, chest, and back before slipping into bed next to the other half of my soul.
As soon as the back of my head hit my pillow, Blue sat up abruptly. “About time papi, I was afraid you slipped down the shower drain.”
She shoved off the covers over us both climbing on top of me. She wiggled around, locking my thighs between her knees and resting her head on my chest perfectly under my chin. She reached back for the covers, bringing them back over us as she settled onto me.
My fingertips danced along the smooth skin of her back, raising goose bumps in their path. “Sorry Blue, I thought you were sleeping.”
“Papi hablame, talk to me. What’s really killing you inside? Is it me?”
My hand stilled on her back as she pressed herself harder into me. “Blue, please don’t doubt my love for you. You can think anything else bad of me but that. I want you forever baby. Did I not just make you Dulce Violetta Hawthorne?”
She giggled under the sheets. “Oo papi, say that again.”
I palmed her more than perfect ass as she licked and kissed my chest.
; ”Papi I’m going to sleep now, but please don’t shut me out. I need you.”
“Never Blue. You’ll always have a front row seat to my delusional mind. Go to sleep baby. I love you.”
“I love you more.”
I held my wife tightly in my arms as her body and breathing relaxed. I continued to run my hands and fingertips along her body, feeling her dissolve into me. When I finally decided to give sleep a chance, there was a soft knock on my door.
A couple seconds later, there was another tap. I really didn’t want to remove myself from underneath Blue, but sleep just wasn’t written in the stars for me yet.
I slowly and carefully rolled over with Blue, wrapping her body up like a burrito to replace my body heat. I got up, grabbing a pair of flannel pajama pants, pulling them on and opening the door.
Walking away was Ocean shirtless in a pair of basketball shorts. I don’t know how the hell the man was up. He and Sunshine were fucking for hours. I’d be freaking exhausted. The pregnant Sunshine was a super freak and it was starting to scare me honestly. Lord knows what type of kinky shit Blue and I would have to walk into for the next seven months of her pregnancy.
House…we need to buy one of those split floor plan homes.
“Pssst, you okay?” I whispered into the hallway as I closed my bedroom door.
Ocean turned around quick with a grin on his face. “Sorry Law, I just really need to talk to you and wanted to do it before thing one and two wake up again.”
I laughed as I made my way towards the hallway to him, dropping my arm around his neck as we walked into the living room. “Hablame hermano-talk to me brother.” We both laughed cracking up at my terrible enunciation of the Spanish language.
We walked into the kitchen, turning on the dimmer set of lights. I opened the fridge, grabbing a beer. I didn’t drink and neither did Ocean...well not right now anyway. The six-pack of Corona was more for Ocean’s dad when he came by.
I motioned to the beer in my hand, motioning to Ocean to see if he wanted one. He looked down the hallway towards his room and with a shy smile, reached out for it.
Wow!
Ocean was definitely scared of Sunshine and that shit was fucking funny. I started laughing.
He snatched the beer out of my hands. “What?! You know if pregnant Liv walks in here and finds me chugging down this beer, we’d be divorced within twenty-four hours.”
“Bro, you’re a grown ass man! Drink the fucking beer and speaking of pregnant Sunshine. Is she even alive? That shit was crazy. What the hell did you do to her? She walks around with this crazy look in her eye all day; watching you like a cheetah eyeing her breakfast, lunch, and dinner.”
Ocean spit out the beer he was chugging into the sink, covering his mouth with his arm. I was almost done with mine and the immediate buzz I was feeling after one sorry ass beer had me cracking up too. Ocean shushed me, grabbing my shoulders and dragging me out onto the terrace.
It was cold as fuck out but shit, it felt good. The coldness that had my body quivering was a reminder that I was fucking human still. It was funny. I was starting to become Ocean and he was slowly starting to turn into me in a sense. I didn’t know whether that was good or bad, but I figured it was good because we weren’t bad people. So we were a lot of fucked up in the head and hearts but other than that, we were freaking AWESOME!
“So is she still alive? You have me afraid for her life man.” I tried to keep a straight face, but I felt like we were back in high school bragging about fucking the newest hottest chick.
“Yes she’s alive, man.” Ocean finally found his voice after wiping the tears running down his face from how hard he was laughing. “Sorry, I don’t know what it is about her being pregnant but fuck, she’s got me beat with the shit she wants me to do to her. I figure might as well give it to her now because in a few short months, she’s going to be a twin powerhouse.” His eyes were bright and filled with pride as he spoke of his pregnant wife, my Sunshine.
I was happy for him and Sunshine, but I’d be a fool if I didn’t feel jealous because I did. It got quiet for a minute as we both lost ourselves in our inner thoughts.
Ocean broke the silence first. “I’m sorry Law. I’ve been so wrapped up in my own shit that I haven’t been paying attention to what matters the most. You and Blue mean the world to me. She is an amazing woman and I’m happy you found her, I really am. So what’s going on with you? Liv told me about the fertility specialist you two are seeing next week. I’m not one to be all in your shit, but Liv and I will go if you need us to. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do or anywhere I wouldn’t go to support you and Blue.”
I looked out over the lake that was shimmering under the light of the moon. “Nah, don’t apologize. Today was just me being a bitch, nothing you did. I think I’m on the man-red.”
Ocean laughed. “You’re actually admitting you have man periods?”
Yes, it sounded silly but men have their moments too and those I call my man-reds.
“Don’t laugh asshole you have them too and frequently might I add. Your shit is downright irregular!”
“Okay, okay I get it.” Ocean continued to laugh to himself and hearing his laughter calmed me a bit.
“I haven’t been talking about it much, so I guess I needed someone to take out my frustrations on and you were it. The sad part is Ocean, is that I’m not messed up for the fact that Blue might not be able to have children. What’s haunting me is all the pain she endured. All the shit she went through while I was oblivious to anything else other than fighting and fucking as many girls as I could. Shit, you remember how bad we used to be. I never once took a second look or thought when it came to those girls and grown ass women we ruined. I feel guilty for not saving her from that. Yeah I know, there’s no way I could have known but still, I can’t get that guilt out of my system.”
Ocean shook his head as if he was trying to picture the scenario if it was Sunshine who suffered that abuse and he nearly turned green. “Damn. I don’t blame you Law, but we have to deal with this. It’s going to ruin you and it’s going to ruin what you and Blue have. You holding on to this shit while she’s trying to move on is hurting her. I know you don’t want that, so what do you want to do about it? You want to go after the assholes that hurt Blue? I’ll do it if you want me to; I’m the one with the past record.” He said, laughing sadly at the truth.
“Oh shit! I totally forgot when you put those guys in the hospital for messing with Stormie. No. I can’t ask that of you and that’s not what I want. I want to be brave like Blue and move on. Forgive and forget. All that good shit, you know?”
“Yeah. I know.”
There was a brief silence again as we stared up into the night sky. It was a clear night and the stars were shinning so brightly it was beautiful.
“You know when I get lost, which is frequently and just about every damn day, I pray to Stormie. Other than Liv, she’s my homing beacon. When I talk to her, I swear she listens and sometimes after reaching out to her or her memory, crazy shit happens that reminds me of her. Like if she really is listening and answering me when I ask her for help.”
When he stopped talking, I caught a glimpse of a shooting star and smacked his back to look in the direction I was pointing in.
“See what I mean? She’s everywhere, man.” He laughed to himself for a while, looking up to the sky with the same admiration he used to look at Stormie with when she was here with us. “Law we need an emergency honeymoon for the both of us. I was thinking of taking us all to Treasure Island in Clearwater, Florida. You remember that spot my dad used to take us to when he had fights in Florida? That’s where I want to take Liv and I want—I need you and Blue to come with us. What do you think?”
I thought about it. We did just officially became married men and considering the informal ceremony we had; which was by far the best fucking wedding I’ve ever seen, our wives deserved that much. The both of us on the white sand of those beaches was something I would never turn d
own.
Just thinking of seeing Blue in a fucking two piece bathing suit under the sun on a beach with white sand, had my dick pressing against the concrete waist high wall I was leaning on.
“I’m in Ocean. White sand, beach, two sexy and exotic women on our arm. Fuck yes, we’ll go.”
Ocean smiled, relieved that I said yes. “There’s something else.”
“Shit…do I want to know this? This isn’t one of those I’m secretly in love with a man confessions is it? Because if it is, I’m running inside and sticking Sunshine on your ass.”
He reached up, slapping the back of my head. “Shut up! What I was about to say was…I think I want to help Scarlet.”
He looked away from me as he said his baby sister’s new name. The one he called her out of his need to become her protector after witnessing how bad Sabrina was; which I was extremely proud of him for. That little girl needed him more than anything.
I placed my hand on his shoulder, pulling him so he could turn and look at my face. “Hey O, you know I’m down for whatever plan you have for saving her. I’m glad you’ve decided to step in. She needs you in her life bro. She will never replace Stormie that much is a given, but she is a part of you. She’s a part of all of us whether we want to admit it or not.”
He looked me in the eye and slowly said. “I want you and Blue to adopt her. I want you to be her father, Law. I’ll be as much a father to her as I can, but with Liv and the two on the way…I don’t want to let Scarlet down. Blue is a great woman and I want her to be Scarlet’s mother. Sabrina doesn't deserve her."
I felt the blood drain from my face as I stumbled back, letting my cold back lean up against the icy concrete wall behind me. I looked at Ocean and he was calm; he thought this through and he was being sincere. He wanted me to be his stepsister’s father. How the hell does that work?
Sabrina hasn’t mentioned anything about putting her up for adoption and neither has my mother. She would have told me something like that. I looked up at Ocean with a blank and probably terrified expression on my face.
“I know Law, there’s a lot of shit I have to figure out. All the legal shit to deal with, but my dad will help us with that. I’m positive about it. Sabrina hasn’t said she was going to put her up for adoption, but did you see her today? We can’t leave that baby with her any longer than she needs to be. I will deal with Sabrina when it comes to the adoption and Scarlet, but you are going to be her father. Please man, I know it’s a lot to ask of a man to take in a child that isn’t theirs, but she’s different Law. She’s family.”
Hawthornes Calm Manuscript Page 11
