Broken by Desire

by Dani René

  “No, not nothing! Tell me what’s wrong? Is it Lucien?” Hearing his name tugs at my heart.

  Chapter 11

  Lucien

  As I sit down at my computer, I notice there’s a reply from Cassie to my earlier email. My eyes skim the words and my heart constricts. I pick up my phone, hitting the call button on her name. Voicemail. Fucking Claudia! Without a second thought I race out of the office. “Take messages Stacy; I am leaving for the day.”

  “Yes, sir.” The elevator pings as soon as I arrive at the doors, I hit tenth floor button, and it descends at a snail’s pace. Why the fuck did I not talk to Cassie before. Shit! The doors open on the floor and I race to Cassie’s office. She’s gone. I try calling her again. Nothing. She must have just left.

  When I reach the ground floor, I all but sprint through the reception with eyes on me. I make my way out of the building and look in every direction. She’s gone. It’s over. Like fuck it is! I run down the road towards the coffee shop. My only idea is that she would have walked that way. I know she lives close by. Only one person can help, I hit the call button, and Robert answers on the second ring. “Robert, get me Cassie’s address. You have five minutes.”

  “Yes, Mr. Verán.” Less than five minutes later her address pops up on a text message from Robert. He’s fucking incredible.

  I realize running down the street in a suit is not something you see every day, but I wish people would stop fucking staring at me. As I am about to reach the coffee shop, I spot her. She’s on the phone across the road from me. My heart is pounding. How do I approach her? I can’t go caveman on her, she will freak out. Although, I could throw her over my shoulder and spank her ass for walking away from me.

  I am dumbstruck, just standing watching her. When she turns, her gaze lands on me and her face falls. The pain in her eyes rip me to pieces. Fucking Claudia! “Cassie!” She ignores me and carries on walking in the opposite direction. “Cassie, Goddamnit!” People are now staring at me even more. I must look like a complete lunatic. She’s getting away. I have no choice, so I make a run for it. She’s not fucking walking away from me. Once I reach her, with a firm grip on her shoulders, I spin her around. Her eyes are puffy and red. She’s been crying.

  “What Lucien?” Her voice is hard and I can see every emotion on her face. She wears her heart on her sleeve and right now, it’s hurting. When I touch her face, she let’s me. That’s a good sign.

  “Please, give me a chance to explain. Please? Cassie, you have to at least give me that?” The pain is so evident in her beautiful features. Come on Cassie, give me a chance? I can make this right. I realize as I think the words how much I want it. That no matter what happens I want her. She’s the only thing in my life that makes sense. There is no explanation for my feelings or why they’re so strong for her.

  “Talk.” Her voice is raspy with emotion. She is just about holding it together, so am I. With a quick nod, I scramble to find the words to make her stay.

  “Look Cassie, I told you Claudia is difficult. She found out about us traveling to Hawaii from my assistant. Claudia is over protective, manipulative and evil. She will try to break us up, the malicious bitch will do anything.” The venom in my words make her wince. “Please don’t run, sweetness? We can get through this.” I stroke her cheek with the tip of my index finger, lifting her chin, so that her eyes meet mine. The only thing I can hope is that she can see the pleading in my eyes because I have nothing else to give her right now.

  Then she shakes her head, and the pain in my heart cripples me. After only a few days with her, my darkness has abated. The dreams haven’t come. With her I could try to let go of my past and have a normal life. The thought of her walking away scares the shit out of me, but I have never been one to back down from a challenge. “Lucien, we only spent a weekend together. I mean. I can’t. It’s just painful, I have been through too much to struggle anymore. I am sorry.” I wanted to pull her into my arms, to order her to stay, but she isn’t mine. She never agreed to it, I can’t stake a claim like that. Even though every part of me wants to claim her. “I should go.”

  Fuck! I am losing her! Just like that! There is no way I can do that sweetheart; you will come back to me. She walks past me and her sweet scent engulfs my senses. I stop her when our shoulders brush against each other. The visible tremble of her body is an indication my effect on her, the same as hers on me. I make her a promise, one that I will keep. No matter what. “Cassie,” my lips are at her ear and I make sure she can feel every word I am saying, “I will give you as much space as you want, but I am not giving up on you. Just realize that. I fucking claimed you. You’re mine.” My words are harsh, dark and dangerous, but I can’t let her go.

  Before I walk away I inhale her scent, committing it to memory. Then I make my way down the road. I have just left a part of me on the sidewalk, along with the promise I made her. When I pull my phone from my jacket pocket, I text Robert to pick me up at the coffee shop. Once she’s gone, I will go back, but I can’t watch her walk away from me.

  Half way down the road, I hear her call my name. “Lucien!” She’s actually fucking calling me. As I spin around, I see her sprinting down the sidewalk to me. I open my arms as she jumps into them. “What’s this, sweetness?” Shock radiates through me, but also something I didn’t know I had. Hope. My body flush against hers. She feels so good against me I almost believe she wants me. When I pull away and look into her intense chocolate eyes.

  “I need to stop running, Lucien. There are things in my past that constantly cause me to run, but I need to face things.” The words she promises me there on the sidewalk make my heart skip. She wants to be with me. “I moved to LA to start again, and that’s what I need to do.” At that moment, I want to tell her everything, the fear of her leaving is immense, but I will give her my honesty. I am standing on the edge of a cliff, ready to fall for this girl. Hard and fast. I just hope she’s ready to jump with me. My lips find hers and the breath is back in my lungs. Her mouth opens for me, accepting me, as our tongues dance in an intense erotic tumble, I taste every part of her.

  She slowly slides down and when her feet touch the sidewalk, I step back and stare at her. “Good. I have a lot in my past I have to explain, but not right now. I want to take you home now.” She shakes her head and I frown.

  “We’re going to my place. Then you need to talk.” Nodding, I text Robert to come to Cassie’s apartment and bring a change of clothes for me. I lace my fingers in hers and we walk side by side up the street to her apartment, hand in hand. The smile on my face is hurting my cheeks, but I can’t stop it. I almost lost her, but that will not happen again. She’s never leaving my side again. Ever. Just then, as if the sky knew how my heart hurt, the heaven’s open on us. Fuck sake! Are you kidding me? She giggles and I can’t help smiling as we run in the rain. This is one of the most exciting times I have ever spent with a girl. I hold onto her hand and run up the road.

  When we reach her apartment and step inside, we’re both dripping wet. “That was insane!” She giggles and I stare at the way her clothes cling to her curves and blood travels straight to my cock.

  “I do like you all wet, Ms. Winters.”

  “You do? I would never have guessed, Mr. Verán.” As soon as my name leaves her lips, I lift her onto the counter and undress her. My fingers fumble as I unbutton the top she is wearing, I slide it over her shoulders, it drops in a wet puddle on the floor. I unclasp her bra, and it joins the growing pile of clothes on the floor.

  Her nipples harden from the chill in the air and being wet. My mouth is watering to taste her, leaning forward my mouth envelopes her hardened buds, sucking them into my mouth, biting down softly. Right now, I need to take her, be inside her and make her scream my fucking name. She tugs at my wet shirt. Her fingers move swiftly over the buttons.

  “I need you, Cassie,” my words are a soft moan and I don’t recognize the need in my voice. “Shower?” She nods with a smile on her face. She’s letting
me in, thank fuck she’s agreeing. I lift her off the counter and instinctively her legs wrap around me. We make our way to the bathroom. Setting her down, I glance at her naked body; nothing has ever been more beautiful than my girl, turned on and naked just for me. My pants and boxers are on the floor in record time. The need to be inside her is burning into me. She turns on the water and when she turns to face me again, a small gasp escapes her lips and her eyes rake over me. We step into the hot spray together. Her body is a few inches from mine, and I am already rock hard. “I will tell you everything, first, we are going to fuck.” The rasp in my voice makes her shiver. She grabs the shower gel and squirts some on the sponge. I take it from her, my eyes locked on hers. She gives me a small nod, allowing me to do this is a sign, to me at least, that she trusts me.

  I lather her body, with slow careful movements. This is one of my favorite things to do. Her skin is soft and smooth and I want to lick every inch of her. I rub the gel over her ass and down her legs. I can see her knees trembling at the attention I am showing her body. “Turn around sweetness,” I growl. She spins around, glancing down at me. I am on my knees in front of her and from this angle, she looks incredible. My hands roam up her legs and grip her hips. She leans forward, and my tongue is on her smooth slick folds. The taste of her sweet warm pussy sends me to another place.

  “Lucien, please?” My name on her lips, the moan has my cock aching to have her sheath me. Tighten around me. Milk me until every last drop of come is inside her. I continue my attention on her tight little cunt. My teeth graze her clit and her whole body convulses. “Come for me sweetness, I need to taste you.” This is her undoing as she comes over my tongue. I let out a primal growl, tasting the sweet juices from her core. As soon as her honey drips from her body onto my tongue, I can’t stand it anymore.

  I kiss my way back up her body. My eyes locking on hers. “You’re so fucking beautiful when you come.”

  “Lucien…”

  “Slow, baby, then I will make you scream my name.” My hands grip her ass, and she wraps her legs around me. I pin her against the wall, her begging edging me on. With one swift move, I slide into her. Fucking hell, she feels good. Tight, wet, warm. So fucking perfect. My restraint is falling away and I slam into her hard. Her nails dig into my shoulders, urging me deeper, harder and faster. She’s mine, all fucking mine.

  “Please?” She begs again as I drive my length into her and she cries out. Her head drops back against the wall; she shuts her eyes. Her lips part and a soft moan escapes, sending a shock of pleasure to my cock. There is something deep and primal about us fucking. There is nothing sweet and sensitive about this. I maintain my relentless assault plunging into her. When she digs her nails into my shoulders, I know she’s close. “Lucien.” She moans loudly. My name on her lips is her claim to me. She has it. I can’t deny this woman has fucking claimed me. She has no fucking idea what she’s done to me, but I am hers. Every fucking inch of me.

  “Cassandra, you’re mine.” My voice lays claim to her, again and again. The water cascading over us is like a waterfall of emotions. “Now fucking come with me!” My order sending her over the edge, she obeys me even in the throes of passion. Her pussy spasms around me, tightening around my shaft.

  “Lucien!” She cries out again, her body shuddering in my hands and I hold her tight.

  “My lumiére!” That’s all I need to lose control and my come shoots into her heated cunt. I have just given myself to her, more than I have given anyone before. There’s something about her and I am lost in emotion. This is such a big mistake. You will hurt her Verán, that’s all that you’re good for. Fuck it, I need her. Her light, her innocence, and her passion. I want her, mind, body, soul, but most of all I will claim her heart. We stare at each other for a few moments before I set her down. Her face is flushed, and she’s still shaky. I hold her against me, planting a soft kiss on her head. What the fuck have I done?

  I realize we had things to discuss, but I wanted to fuck her before we went there. A trip down memory lane is my least favorite thing to do. When I reach over and turn the water off, she steps out of the shower and grabs two towels. She wraps one around her wet body and hands me the other. Fuck she’s beautiful. I grab the towel and offer her a small smile, wrapping it around my waist, and Cassie’s face is a picture. “You look…” Her voice trails off and I can tell she’s speechless after our shower.

  I smirk at her. “I do?” She swats me with a hand towel and I chuckle. We walk into her bedroom, I flop onto the bed, and watch her get dressed. As soon as she’s pulled a top on, the doorbell rings. “That’s Robert, with my clothes.”

  “I will get them.” As much as I want to avoid what’s coming, I have to be honest with her. This will be an interesting conversation. I can’t imagine what Claudia told Cassie. When she comes back to the bedroom, she smiles. “Robert says that Jayce asked for you to call him.” I nod and she passes me the clothes Robert dropped off.

  “Okay, I guess I didn’t hear my phone over you screaming my name in there.” I point to the shower as I pull up my sweats. Cassie’s face turns bright red.

  “Was I really that loud?” She’s adorably innocent, and it makes me want to walk out the door and act like I never met her. There is so much she will have to deal with if she wants to be with me. Not to mention my penchant to tying her up and doing all sorts of dark dirty things to her. But, I am not the nice guy, I am the selfish bastard who can’t let her go, so here I am. Standing in her bedroom, hoping I never have to tell her goodbye.

  “Baby, I love when you’re loud.” I say with a cheeky wink, she’s blushing again.

  “Lucien! Don’t be a douche!” Her face is crimson, and I can’t help chuckling at her unease. “Do you want a sandwich? I am starving.” I nod and she makes her way to the kitchen. As I pull my phone out of my pocket, it’s thankfully still working. There are five missed calls from Jayce. I hit call.

  “Luke! Where the hell were you?”

  “None of your business, what’s up?”

  “Sasha and Claudia are having lunch at our place. I overheard them talking, apparently Cassie knows about your engagement.” Fuck! Ex-engagement!

  “Thanks Jay, I am with her now. We’re going to talk.”

  “Call me later.” As soon as I hang up, I make my way into the kitchen to find my gorgeous girl cutting the sandwiches.

  Cassandra

  Turning to see Lucien join me in the kitchen, I realize it’s now or never. There is a lot he needs to tell me and we are not going back to anything remotely romantic until he tells me the truth. The shower was a slip on my part, but now I need the truth. I can’t deal with his mother, and so called fiancée, there is no way I want to be the other woman. I pick up the plates and place them on the counter. Watching him slide into the chair, I take a deep breath. “So, we need to talk Lucien. You romancing me in the shower and fucking me till I can’t stand doesn’t make me forget.” I glance up at him and catch him smirking. My choice words did that, but I need him to see he affects me. I can’t deny it, and if I am going to put myself out there, then he should do the same.

  “Till you can’t stand? I like that. Can we do it again?” He chuckles when I throw a kitchen towel at him. With his hands up in surrender, his expression is suddenly serious. I dread what’s coming, but I asked for this. He needs to trust me, and maybe I will be able to trust him.

  “I’m serious Lucien.”

  “I know, babe. Let’s eat and we can talk.” I slip into the chair next to him, picking up my sandwich. After I take a small bite, I turn to him. My gaze falls on his mouth as I watch him devour the sandwich I had just prepared. As he finished the first half, he turned. “Cassie, I told you Claudia has a particular idea of the kind of woman I should be with. It’s not the person I want to be with.” When he picks up the glass of juice, taking a sip, he stalls for a moment. “I want to be with you Cassie.” My heart races as he reaches for my hand. The need to touch him is overwhelming, and I slip min
e in his, and the warmth envelopes me. I wasn't sure why he called her by her name, but I wanted the rest of the story before asking questions. I nodded slowly, waiting for the blow. The fiancée. He had to tell me about it.

  “What about the fiancée your mother mentioned? And the annual photo shoots you go on with female staff members?” He shook his head.

  “The fiancée is my ex. My mother still has it in her head we are made for each other. I would have proposed, but things happened between us. Those I will explain to you soon, for now I need you to know that I am not with Sasha in any way.” I saw the anguish in his eyes. He clearly loved her. What if he still loves her? I mean, they were about to be engaged. Surely, he wouldn’t be here if he did. Why would he? Maybe he was with me to upset his mother. Cassie! Stop it! He likes you!

  I shook my head. That made little sense to me. “So you gave her the cover of your latest swimsuit edition?” He glanced up in surprise and I realized that he didn’t know Jayce told me. I was sure I mentioned it in Hawaii. Didn’t I? Shit! I needed to see a doctor. The stress is getting to me again.

  “Cassie I didn’t pick the models, my father did. My mother insisted he give her the cover. He listens to Claudia; she can be… persistent. She didn’t realize you would come along and knock me for six.” He gave me that sexy grin, dimples included. I couldn’t help but return it. His smile deepened, and I found my resolve crumbling. Deep down my heart was sealed in a cage, but I wanted to release it for Lucien. I didn’t think I could, not yet. There is still too much that we need to learn about each other. Too many secrets are holding us back right now, and I am scared that when it all comes crashing down, my heart will be a casualty.

  “I realize there is still a lot we have to learn about each other Lucien, but I don’t want surprises like that again. There is no way I can deal with it. My past has way too many potholes and I can’t go back there. I was broken, I suppose in a way I still am.” He nodded. The mood between us was solemn, and I detested it. He made me feel so complete I wanted us to go back to Hawaii and stay there.