Broken by Desire

by Dani René

  “Sweetness, I never want to take you there. I want to know you, and I promise that I will never break you. The only thing I want is to be the one to fix you.” He laced his fingers through mine. Didn’t he realize that he does so much more than just fix me? He makes me feel things I left buried for two long years.

  “You do, Lucien, you do so much more.” There was no way I could explain it that would make sense. Maybe he thinks I am crazy, but I needed to say the words.

  “And you do that for me Cassie. You’ve taken my darkness and given me light where there wasn’t any. You, your smile, your body, I ache for you.” His words broke into the cage where I held my heart, taking it from the pain and anguish I have hidden and given me something I didn’t have. Hope.

  “Is that why you call me your light?” I blushed; he always said it when we were in bed. Or any other place he was buried inside me. He nodded, dropping his gaze.

  “Cassie, I am not a perfect guy. There are things I haven’t told you about my past, and I will I… It’s a lot to take in. My relationships have been forced on me, I have never cared for a girl before, the way I do for you. I don’t date. Romance is something of a foreign concept to me. So, I became… The bastard. The one who caused the girls to cry because that’s how I was in control. I can be rough. Aggressive. When it comes to sex, I need to dominate. My taste is darker than guys you’ve probably been with. When I am buried deep inside a girl, there aren’t any emotions. It’s just fucking.” I wince at his words, but I asked. His honesty is refreshing. “Although with you, it’s different. You’re different. I still want to dominate the fuck out of you, and you’re so responsive. You make me want to do so many things to you. Things I am sure would freak you out, but to have you kneeling for me, that would be my wildest fantasy come true.” His gaze meets mine for the first time since he started talking; there is dark desire in his eyes. “I don’t want to scare you, but I want you Cassandra. So many dark, erotic, and dirty thoughts run through my mind with you. When we are ready I will tell you more that's if you want to know. If you want me to leave, then I will respect your wishes.”

  My heart was racing at his words. His confession making me squirm. After the few times we’ve been together I recognized his dominance in the bedroom. “I prefer to take control; I need the girl I am with to submit to me sexually.” When his eyes find mine I could see the apprehension, he was terrified of me running from the truth. “If you don’t want this, I understand. Just know that I could and would never hurt you. I care about you too much. My promise is that I will always push your limits, but only to bring you pleasure. If you ever want to stop. We stop.” He turned his gaze away, looking at the countertop instead. His fingers tracing the pattern on the surface. Those fingers that could bring me so much pleasure. I sat quietly for a moment, taking in the enormity of what he had just told me. I needed him, so much. He’s never hurt me and I trusted he wouldn’t.

  “Lucien,” my voice is soft, “look at me?” I plead with him. I want to say this while looking into his eyes. When he eventually turns, I offer him a small smile. “I need you.” Without another thought I slide off the chair and stand between his thighs. He’s wearing the pair of sweats and T-shirt he asked Robert to drop off at my place. Since his suit was soaked through. “Will you let me show you?” I murmur. He frowns, but nods. I pull him up and when he’s standing, I drop to my knees in front of him and tug the sweatpants down. He’s aroused, semi hard, I grasp him in my hand and gently stroke him. I glance up at him, our eyes locked in a passionate gaze. I flick my tongue over the tip, tasting his arousal, sending a shudder over his body. Without breaking eye contact, our connection, I take the first few inches of him into my mouth. I suck him in.

  “Jesus, Cassie,” he growls, and it spurs me on. I take him all the way into my mouth until the head hits the back of my throat. He’s big, so the last few inches I pump with my hand as I swallow him. I can feel his cock twitch in my mouth. With a slow lick, I trace my tongue along the underside, feeling the veins and ridges. He grabs my hair in a tight grip and fucks my mouth earnestly. “That’s it sweetness, take me deep.” The rasp in his dark voice is so sexy. He thrusts in and out of my mouth as he takes control. I drop my hands, leaving the control to him. “Touch yourself, get your tight little pussy wet for me.” My hands move down, between my legs and I find I am soaked. As I glance up at him, I see the light shining in him. The desire and lust that turns my core into molten lava. The pleasure I am giving him turns me on more than I ever thought possible. His eyes are dark with lust.

  “You’re so fucking beautiful with my cock in your mouth.” His crude words sending a shiver down my spine and heat straight to my core. I suck him in further, my gag reflex subsiding for the moment as I pleasure him the way he did to me in the shower. His head drops back and primal growl emanates from his chest. The carnal way his body tenses turns me on, I love watching him lose all that control he carries. Suddenly he pulls me off him. “I need to fuck you now, hard. Bend over and hold the counter tight.” His command is strained; he’s barely holding it together.

  I bend over and hold onto the edge of the counter. Lucien roughly pulls at my sweatpants and I hear them shred. He groans at the sight of me with no panties on, bent over in front of him. Without warning, he slams into me to the hilt. It knocks the breath from me for a few moments as he impales me on his thick hard cock. “Oh God, you’re so fucking tight. This pussy will be my undoing. You will be my end and my beginning.” The words a raspy whisper and filled with desire. He fists my ponytail around his hand, he tugs my head back. A bite of pain shoots through my skull, but the pleasure is incredible. “You like that baby? Do you like when I fuck you hard?”

  “Yes.” I hiss my reply. The coil tightens in my core and I push back onto him. We’re matched as I meet him thrust for thrust. My grip on the counter tightens and my knuckles are white as I hold on. Lucien is relentless as he drives into me, pinning me against the hard surface. His cock is so deep, hitting that sweet spot that’s about to push me over the edge.

  “That’s it, baby, milk that fucking cock. Give it to me, give me your pleasure!” His command sends me spiraling out of control and over the edge as my orgasm splinters through me. Shattering me into tiny pieces and I cry out his name.

  “Lucien!” He tugs me up by my hair, my back is flush against his chest, and his heart is hammering in his chest. His lips at my ear, his teeth graze the sensitive skin on my neck as he growls.

  “I love fucking you, sweetness.” He slams up into me, hitting my sweet spot and I clench around him again. My knees buckle and his arm snakes around my waist holding me up, his release coating me, marking me, claiming me. “My lumiére.” We stay that way for what feels like hours, my breathing is fast and my knees are shaky.

  “Wow.” Is all I can whisper and Lucien chuckles. As soon as he slips out of me, I feel empty. He scoops me up and walks me to the bedroom. Lucien lays me on the bed, gently. Such a contradiction to what we just did. I watch him walk into the bathroom. When he joins me, he has a warm wet cloth and softly wipes between my legs.

  “Are you okay, sweetness?” I nod and smile. He always asks me that after he’s taken me. It’s the first time that I have been with someone as rough and dominant, but I like it. I love giving him the control.

  “I am. You always ask me that and the answer will always be the same.” He leans in and plants a soft kiss on my lips. His tongue licks at the seam of my lips and I grant him access. My fingers tangle in his messy, just fucked hair and I tug him to me, as I mold myself to him.

  When he pulls away, I am breathless and ready for round two. He makes me insatiable. I wonder if he feels the same about me. He’s said that he wants me and aches for me, but will he ever love me? It’s too soon to think about that. I roll over in bed before he comes back and I feel him slip in behind me. His arm bands around my waist, pulling me into the curve of his body. “Goodnight gorgeous.” He breathes in my ear and it sends shivers down my spine.r />
  “Goodnight handsome.”

  Lucien

  There was something about the way we fucked earlier. It was incredible. The way Cassie let me take her. I was rough, more than I have been before, but she didn’t relent. She gave me her body, and that was more than I could have ever asked for. Lying in bed after our talk was good, I am calmer now. Even though Claudia won’t stop, Cassie knows the truth, well most of it. There are other secrets I need to tell her, but those will have to wait.

  It’s just gone 2 am, and Cassie is asleep next to me. Her apartment is small, quiet, but for some reason I can’t sleep. I have been staring at the ceiling for hours. There are things I need to take care of. I hope that Claudia will give up her fucking sick game of trying to ruin my life. It’s not like she’s my mother. I suppose that’s another story.

  I realize Sasha will try her luck at every turn. She’s had it in for me since that night. Fuck, I was such an idiot. You enjoyed it. You love the pain. Hurting them. When they cry and scream. Fuck off! I can’t do this anymore; this darkness is taking hold of me. Without waking Cassie, I slide out of bed, and pad to the living room. I grab my phone and call Jayce. On the second ring, he answers.

  “You okay?” He’s always concerned when I call him so late.

  “Yes, I told Cassie about me and Sasha, not the full story, it’s too soon for that.” With my thumb and forefinger, I pinch the bridge of my nose. He will not like that I haven’t told her everything. Although she needs the truth, I just can’t bring myself to tell her and see the pain and pity in her eyes because that’s all she will give me.

  “Luke, I like Cassie, she’s sweet, but she will not put up with you not being honest with her. I think she deserves the truth.”

  “Why? So you can swoop in and rescue her from me?” As soon as the words are out, I realize what a dick move it was to say that. “Look Jay, I am sorry man. I didn’t mean it like that. You’re the only one I would trust her with.” And I do. I trust Jayce with my life and ultimately with Cassie’s life. He will never hurt her; he’s proven himself over and over again, since we were kids.

  “I know. I wouldn’t do that to you anyway. Just don’t give me a reason to.” His words anger me more than I would like to admit. The thought of him looking after her fills me with jealousy that can’t be matched with anything I ever felt before. I nod slowly while staring out of the patio doors. It’s dark out, just like my soul when I am not with her. There is no way I can be without her. “I better go. I don’t want to wake her.”

  “You have a sexy sweet girl in bed and you’re here talking to me? Seriously dude, you need to get your priorities straight.” He chuckles and I can’t help smiling. Jayce is ever the playboy, he’s been single for too long. I keep telling him to find a girl, fall in love, but he’s just like me, too much in his past doesn’t allow him the pleasure.

  “Yea, I am. I think I finally am. Catch you up tomorrow.” I shut my phone off, place it on the table, and join my sexy girl in bed. As soon as I slip in beside her, I hear her murmur my name. I wrap her in my arms, tugging her back against my chest. Her warm supple body feels like heaven against me. I close my eyes and let sleep take over. I just hope that tonight the dreams stay away.

  Cassandra

  My eyes open to the sun streaming through my bedroom window. There is a warm body wrapped around me, I roll over and am met with sparkling green eyes. “Good morning sweetness.” Lucien’s sleepy voice made me smile. I glance at his face, its pure perfection. His gaze makes my heart thump just a little faster. He really was gorgeous. His smile, which deepened his dimples was perfect, and I couldn’t help staring at this handsome man next to me.

  “Good morning handsome.” I smile and lean forward to kiss him. He wraps both his arms around me and pulls me into his chest. I giggle as his fingers tickled down my spine and ribs.

  “I love waking up next to you.” His tongue licks at my lips and I open to him. Our mouths crash into each other and the kiss grows more urgent. A low moan escapes my lips and into the kiss. How has he turned me into an insatiable wanton slut? I am addicted to him. All he does is fuel the fire inside me. The ache between my legs was unrelenting, and I wanted breakfast in bed, which didn’t involve any food. As I pull away from him, our eyes meet. His intense gaze has me squirming.

  “And I love waking up next to you. You’re so warm.” I smile at his expression.

  “I am warm? You keep me around because you lack a radiator?” I giggle at him and nod. “Oh, really?” He rolls us over and he is above me. Lucien kneels, without breaking our gaze, grasps my wrists and holds them above my head. He pushes his thigh between my legs, and rubs against my core. I whimper at the welcome intrusion. My hips buck, and I blatantly hump his muscular thigh. “We will have to see about that, sweetness.” He tightens his hold on my wrists and I tingle in anticipation of what’s coming. At this rate, it will be me. Tugging my tank top up to my wrists so they’re now bound by the flimsy material. “Your hands stay there; do you hear me?” I nod. “Good girl. Close your eyes.” I obey his command; my body is already humming in anticipation. His hands caress my skin, from my arms down my sides. It tickles, and I am tempted to move my arms, but he told me not to. His touch is light and my body is bowing off the bed as my back arches to him. “Mmmm, you’re so beautiful.”

  “Lucien,” I breathe his name and the bed dips as he moves. His fingertips on my legs, caressing my thighs. His touch sends sparks to every nerve in my body. He then moves to my side and I feel his kisses at my knees. With a gentle yet firm grasp, he grabs both my ankles, and bends my legs at the knee. He is kneeling between my splayed thighs. The roughness of his stubble on my inner thigh makes me gasp and my hips lift off the bed.

  “Please?” I beg him. He knows I need him to touch me, lick me, and fuck me.

  “It’s okay sweetness, I will take care of you.” His words held more promise than we both realized. Then his warm mouth came down on my heated core and devoured me, licking and sucking my bare pussy. He flattened his tongue against me, lapping and laving at the arousal he was eliciting from my body. Everything he does turns me on like nothing ever did, or ever could. He slowly slid two fingers inside me, back and forth. My body clenched around him. “That’s it. Come for me baby; give me your sweet honey.” My body shuddered with a violent orgasm, but he didn’t relent. He licked me clean, but continued to finger my tight entrance. “I want every ounce of your pleasure. Only for me. All mine. This tight little cunt is mine.” I moaned, bucking my hips in rhythm with his fingers thrusting into me. “Again.” His command sent me spiraling again, and another orgasm splintered through me. When my body stopped shaking, he slowly pulled his fingers from my pussy. “Open your eyes.”

  I did and watched him lick my arousal from his fingers. He leaned down to kiss me and I tasted myself on his lips and tongue. He suddenly plunged into me without warning. His rock hard cock filling me so deep, I almost came undone for a third time. “You are perfect.” His eyes locked on mine, but his words shook me. I wasn’t perfect. He didn’t know that. I closed my eyes and focused on his movements instead. The way he filled my core. We fit together like puzzle pieces and I never wanted to lose this. The feeling of being completely and utterly whole again. I was so close to the edge when he uttered the words with his own release that finally sent me over as we both found release.

  “You complete me.” His words shattered through my heart and deep into my soul rendering me speechless.

  Chapter 12

  Lucien

  The past four months since the weekend we spent in Hawaii were indescribable. After the incident with Claudia telling Cassie about my alleged engagement, she seemed to stay away. I hope she accepted I was with Cassie although I don’t believe that’s the reason for her silence. I still haven’t told Cassie about my past, the demons that lay there have been dormant since she’s been sleeping next to me every night.

  There were so many things still playing on my mind, but my fight with my
demons and secrets seemed to disappear when I was with her. I didn’t worry about things. The nightmares didn’t plague me.

  She’s been seeing a psychiatrist, and although I fight the urge to ask her about it every day, I have given her the time she needs. I can’t expect her to be forthcoming with something that’s hurting her when I haven’t told her everything about me. My feelings for her are strong, there are times I want to say those three words to her, but I am holding back. Is four months even time enough to really feel that for someone? Or am I kidding myself? Jayce even wondered if I had gone soft. I suppose maybe I have.

  It’s October and we’re heading into winter, although it doesn’t get as cold here as it does on the East Coast. I remember spending time in New York, not far from where Cassie lived and freezing my ass off, that is why I live in LA. “Baby?” As I walk into the bedroom, I find Cassie sitting on the floor; she has her hair in a messy bun on top of her head. She’s got wrapping all over the floor with ribbons, tape, scissors and she’s trying to hold a corner of the wrapping down while tearing a piece of the tape from a small roll. “What are you doing?” I lean against the door and fold my arms across my chest.

  “It’s for Jayce.” She huffs and glances up at me. She has a small piece of tape stuck to her cheek and I can’t help chuckling. Jay and her have become close friends. I warned him that if ever his hands or his wandering cock zoned in on my girl, I will cut them off and feed them to him on a platter. To which he told me that I would have to catch him first. Cheeky fucker. He was a track star at university whereas I was the one in art class and learning about publishing.