Broken by Desire

by Dani René

  “Lucien, I was just…” I trailed off, not knowing what I was trying to say. I turn to face my reflection and watch him in the mirror. When his eyes met mine they’re glassy, it’s almost as if he was blinking back tears. This really was an intense subject for him. Our gazes locked in the mirror. He took a small step towards me and circled his arms around my waist. His face next to mine and the light stubble tickles my neck, sending tingles down my spine.

  “Cassandra, I need you to understand one thing. My mother is not in charge of how I live my life. I will date whomever I want. She will have to accept that you’re the one I want. You do not need to prove yourself to anyone, but me.” A chuckle vibrates in his chest and I giggle.

  “I am sure I have proven worthy of you then. Since you approve of me.” I wink and he turns me around in his arms. His lips seal mine and I moan into the kiss. “Okay, then we should go.” I mumble into the kiss, he nods and pulls away reluctantly. I pick up my purse and walk past him into the living room. We make our way out to the car and find Robert waiting for us. Since we still need to collect Kenna, I notice that Lucien had got Robert to drive a limo for us tonight. It’s a sleek black car and as soon as I slide in the opulence of the interior leaves me speechless.

  “You like?” Lucien slides in next to me and all I can do is nod. He reaches out for my hand and I lace my fingers in his. As we pull up to my apartment ten minutes later, Robert opens the door for Kenna, she slips into the seat opposite us and I notice the dress she bought earlier looks immaculate against her tanned skin. We both decided on long elegant dresses, hoping we fit into the crowd we’re about to be subjected to.

  As we pull up to the venue, Lucien helps me out of the car and Robert extends his hand for Kenna. As soon as we step out of the car, the press goes mental. There are shouts from either side of the red carpet, but Lucien ignores them. I hear a few shouts about who his girlfriend is and a few mention Sasha.

  Lucien

  I ignore the shouts about Sasha, my hand is around Cassie’s waist and it pisses me off that they have the nerve to ask about my ex when there is another woman on my arm. As soon as we start walking, Jayce comes up behind us. “There’s my favorite babe!” His voice cuts into me and my body locks with tension when he pulls Cassie in for a hug. I shouldn’t be jealous, but I can’t help it. My natural instinct is to protect her, she’s mine.

  “Hey, Jayce!” She giggles and returns his hug. “Don’t you scrub up well!” Is she flirting with him? This is enough! The tension rolls off me in waves.

  “Oh, you have no idea gorgeous!” He winks. He fucking winked at my girlfriend! I will kill him.

  “Jayce, do you mind not pawing my girlfriend?” My voice is low and only Cassie and he heard me. Which was my intention. He cuts his gaze to me and I can’t help giving him a glare to confirm that I will fucking kill him if he tries anything.

  “Luke, seriously dude? I am just saying hi.” Then his eyes flicker to Kenna and I realize he hadn’t met her yet. Cassie takes the lead to calm the tension again.

  “Jayce, meet my best friend Kenna.” When Jayce takes his cue to try to seduce Kenna, I place my hand on the small of Cassie’s back, and guide her down the carpet to the entrance. We stop a couple of times for the press to get a photo, but I answer no questions. As soon as we’re out of earshot, she’s on my case. “What’s up with you and Jayce?”

  “Later Cass, I can’t talk about it now.” As soon as I brush it off, Cassie vibrates with tension. At first, I think it’s at me, then I turn and my gaze finds Claudia.

  “Lucien, darling!” The ultimate socialite she walks up to us, she is dressed in an emerald green floor-length dress that sparkled. Her jewelry just about blinded me. The diamonds were so big. Her hair was pulled back so tight that she almost had no facial expression. Enjoying spending my father’s money?

  “Mother,” my voice is clipped. I give her an icy peck on the cheek. “This is Cassandra, my girlfriend.” I notice a spark of irritation on her otherwise expressionless face. I love causing the aggravation in her features. This is my life, and no longer yours to rule. Cassie is bristling and I lace my fingers through hers.

  “Oh, I didn’t realize it was a long-term thing?” Her voice is ice and I can’t deal with this anymore. Not before I have had a drink.

  “Mother, please?” I give her a glare, hoping she will drop it.

  “Did you see Sasha is here? She’s looking lovely.” Without fail, she plays her card, mentioning Sasha. When the name leaves her mouth Cassie’s hand goes rigid in mine. She’s still so scared about my ex relationship, I have no idea why, because it’s over. Forever.

  “No mother, I don’t really care if she is here or not. I am with Cassandra as you can see. Sasha and I are over.” I grip Cassie’s arm and tug her away from my mother, I am fuming. My blood is at boiling point. I need a drink. “Fuck it! She fucking riles me up so much. I am sorry about that sweetness!” When we reach the bar, I tug Cassie against me. “Kiss me.” Without waiting for a reply, I crash my mouth onto hers. The sweetness of her mouth calms me more than anything ever has. When I pull away the tension eases in my muscles. “That’s better.”

  “Lucien.” She breathes my name, and it goes straight to my cock. I would love to take you right now. A cheeky wink has a blush spreading on her cheeks. She stares at me breathlessly.

  “Do I take your breath away my love?” My perfect, beautiful girl.

  “Always Lucien, you know that.” She nods slowly and I can’t help my heart leaping in joy.

  I order us each a drink. “Sweetness.” I hand Cassie a glass of wine and I take a gulp of the whiskey it burns its way down. My nerves tingle with anticipation. I am about to suggest we disappear into a room somewhere when we’re interrupted by Jayce and Kenna.

  Cassandra

  “Babe!” I turn to Kenna and Jayce walk up to us at the bar. “Where did you disappear to?” She grabs my wine taking a small sip. All I can do is giggle and shake my head at her expression. The wine is incredible. Only the best for the elite.

  “We ran into Lucien’s mother.” I say and her eyes dart between us. When my glance falls on Jayce and I can see his expression tells me exactly what he thinks of Mrs. Verán.

  “Oh, I am sure that was pleasant,” Jayce chuckles.

  “Mmmm, I wouldn’t go as far as pleasant.” I giggle, taking my wine back from Kenna, taking a huge gulp. Jayce feels the same as I do, that makes getting through this event much more bearable. I offer him a small smile and he gives me a cheeky wink. He always does that; I realize it’s just to upset Lucien. I shake my head at him.

  “Guys, I am standing right here,” Lucien tugs me into the crook of his arm and we all laugh. “Okay, I admit she’s hard work.” He winks down at me and my stomach flip-flops when he smiles, deepening his dimples. My heart races as I stare at the amazing man next to me.

  “Jesus, Luke, hard work? She hates everyone that wasn’t born with a silver spoon in their mouth.” Jayce is suddenly serious, and the tension is tangible. It’s obvious that Claudia doesn’t like anyone that doesn’t have a big bank account, or someone that doesn’t have a title.

  “No Jayce, just drop this. You of all people should be used to it.” His words were harsh, and the pain flickered on Jayce’s face. Something must have happened between them, something deeper than I originally thought. There is still so many secrets, but Lucien won’t tell me here. I will have to wait until we’re home.

  “Come on Lucien, this is getting you both nowhere. Catch you guys later.” I turn and smile, leaving Jayce and Kenna. Once we’re out of earshot, I round on Lucien, “What the hell is wrong with you?” My gaze falls on him and the frustration in his expression is infuriating me.

  “Cassie, don’t do this now!” Lucien leans in and hisses in my ear. I don’t want to fight and I certainly don’t want to cause a scene, but he frustrates me so much.

  “No, I will do this here and I will do it now. I am sick of you treating Jayce like shit because he
’s not a spoilt brat.” I spit out the words and am immediately cringing. When I glance up at him and it looks like I have just slapped him. “I didn’t—”

  “No, you’re right. He’s not a spoilt brat. I am. Don’t worry, I get it, Cassie. I told you, I am not the good guy. I am the rich overconfident bastard. You know what, I am not even her son, but she acts like that.” My mouth drops open and I stare at him in shock. “Yes, Cassie, you want to know me? There, now you do. I am a bastard whose mother didn’t love him enough to keep him around. Nobody likes keeping me around.” He spins on his heel and walks off past the crowd and I follow him. Trying to catch up to him in these damn heels is proving impossible. All I can see is his back as he walks out of the ballroom. Once out in the hallway, I watch him duck into a room just passed the restrooms. I follow him in and find myself in a small office.

  “Lucien!” Grabbing his wrist. “Just stop, please?” When he turns, the pain etched on his handsome face makes my heart stop. “Just wait, listen to me.” My voice is a whisper. I want to hold him and tell him everything will be okay. That I want him in my life, I want to tell him I want him forever, but I can’t. This isn’t the time. It’s almost as if it will never be the right time.

  “Cassandra, I have a lot that you haven’t yet learned about me, and yes, I haven’t been open about myself. I am trying. I am not used to sharing my life with someone.” He drops his gaze, and scrubs his hands over his face. All I can do is stare at the war he’s having inside himself. “I have never had someone, who…” His voice trails off. This broken man in front of me needs so much love, but he keeps pushing me away. I step forward and wrap my arms around his waist, when he doesn’t pull away, I realize he’s calmed down.

  “I know. Neither am I, you know that. I just don’t like to be shut out.” Tears threaten, but I blink them back. I cannot ruin my makeup. “We can talk later. Let’s just enjoy the party?” His eyes flicker with mischief and I realize what’s on his mind.

  “Okay.” He leans in and kisses me softly, licking the seam of my lips. I open to him. He licks into my mouth and I suck his tongue and flick my own over his. His hands reach down and lift me against him, walking me back, he pins me against the door. A deep growl rumbles in his chest and his erection presses against my core. He is so close; I can feel his heart racing in his chest. I pull back and take in the beautifully broken man that’s stolen my heart. He’s standing here, polished in his immaculate suit, only I have seen the painted body beneath. It seemed his scars ran deeper than I had thought.

  “We have to get back.” I whisper, although it’s the last thing I want to do. He doesn’t answer, instead snakes his one hand down the side of my body, finding the slit of my dress.

  “Open.” I obey and my legs open for him. His fingers find my soaked panties as he strokes my heat. My head drops back, and he pushes the small material of my panties to the side. “You need to be quiet okay, baby.” I nod, biting my lip to keep from moaning. There are people walking past the door outside, the fact that we could get caught has my body trembling. Lucien slips two fingers into my slick folds, pumping his fingers in and out slowly. “Look at me.” I open my eyes and see the desire in his mossy green eyes. His hand moves faster, taking me to the edge. “Come for me, lumiére.” My body obeys as only it can and I come undone over his hand.

  Lucien

  Watching her come is the most incredible thing ever. I am rock hard, but we can’t stay in here much longer. The speeches are supposed to start soon and I have to be there. I just couldn’t stop myself, she’s under my skin and inside my heart. Whenever we fight, all I want to do is hold her, fuck her and make her forget. Make the pain and agony go away. I have never truly been in love before and it scares me shitless. With a soft kiss on her lips, I pull my hand from between her legs. Her eyes are locked on mine. I lick my fingers, tasting her sweet honey. Fucking hell, she tastes so good.

  “I suppose we better get back.” I wink and she giggles.

  “You’re insufferable, Mr. Verán.”

  She whispers, her hot breath on my neck. Jesus, this will be the most difficult speech I have to live through. I would have to stand on stage with a fucking painful hard on.

  “Do you like doing that, Cassie?” She turns and looks at me innocently.

  “No idea what you’re talking about, Sir.” I have to readjust myself before we make our way back into the main ballroom. As we weave our way through the crowd, Claudia is making her way onto the stage. As long as she keeps her speech short, I can give mine and then Cassie and I can leave. That’s all I want, to get out of this place. I lean in and plant a soft kiss on Cassie’s lips but Claudia, starting her speech, interrupts us. Her gaze cuts to me and I see the venom in her eyes. I shiver and hold onto Cassie’s hand. This will not be good.

  “Ladies and gentleman, can I have your attention, please?” She will fuck this whole thing up I can feel it. “I would like to welcome you all to our Annual Charity Ball. All proceeds will go to our Abuse Survivors Charity. Set up in the name of my beautiful son, Lucien Verán.” People applaud and turn to look at me. I give a small smile and nod. “Come up here, darling,” her voice like syrup. On show for the audience. I have no choice, but to go up there. All eyes are on me, I make a public display of affection, giving Cassie a kiss on the cheek. I realize this will rile Claudia up. As soon as I am on the stage, my eyes never leave Cassie, but the next words out of my step-mother’s mouth sends an icy shiver down my spine. “I also want to call up the beautiful Sasha Alexander, she and Lucien started this charity together. Since they’re partners I would like them both up here.” She’s calling Sasha up?! Fuck it! My eyes immediately fall to Cassie, but she turns and runs out of the venue. I scan the crowd for Jayce, giving him a nod and watch him follow her out. There is no way I can walk out now without repercussion, so I have to let it go. My hate for Claudia is at an all-time high.

  “What the fuck are you thinking?” I hiss into her ear while the crowd applaud Sasha.

  “I am just protecting you from gold digging little whores. Just like that night with Sasha.” Her voice is laced with venom and I feel like choking the life out of her. What? The night with Sasha? Before I can say anything, the crowd are watching us again. I just hope Jayce can calm Cassie down somewhat. As soon as the crowd have calmed and Claudia continues with her speech, I give a small nod to the crowd and step off the stage. Still confused by her words, I need to figure out what she meant, but I have had enough of this shit. I need to calm down before I find Cassie.

  My body is vibrating anger and I could easily kill someone. I asked Jayce to look out for her, but I have a feeling there’s more to his feelings for her. In the hallway, I find Kenna. “Where is she?” I have no time to waste; I need to explain to her what the hell is going on. Taking a deep breath. I fix my gaze on Kenna, hoping she knows where my girl is.

  “She’s talking to Jayce. Why didn’t you tell her? That’s your ex isn’t it?” I nod. Not in the mood to explain my love life to her right now. “Lucien, I told you don’t hurt her.”

  “Listen, Kenna, I realize you’re looking out for her, but this is what my step-mother does. She doesn’t approve of Cassie, so she’s going out of her way to break us up. Over my dead body will she get that right.” I lose all fight when I think of Cassie walking away. It will break me. There won’t be anything for me to live for. This girl has gotten into the deepest parts of me and brought light to my dark life.

  “Then you need to start being honest with her. She can’t go through this again. Not after…” Kenna’s voice trails off. Something happened to Cassie. Fear prickles through me and I can’t even imagine what she’s had to endure.

  “Kenna? What?”

  “That’s her story to tell you. You need to be completely honest that’s what Cassie needs.” I nod.

  Cassandra

  I glance around, Jayce is staring at me. My heart is racing, I take a few short breaths. She is his partner; they obviously are working together. C
losely. He didn’t tell me. Why didn’t he tell me? The panic is taking over and my chest is tight. “Cassie? Can we talk?” My glance flits up into sky-blue eyes. His face is calm, and he reaches out for me. I offer a small smile and take his hand.

  “Jayce.” I nod staring at him, the pensive expression on his face makes me more nervous. We turn and walk towards the stairwell, I open the door and sit on the lowest one. He joins me and his calm aura envelope me. “What’s up?”

  “I saw you walk out after his mother acted like a fucking idiot. I wanted to see if you were okay?” When he wraps an arm around my neck, he pulls me into his arms, holding me as the tears fall down my face. She’s his partner. They have something together.

  “I will be. It was a shock to hear it. You know? I mean, I know they’re over, but they work together. He doesn’t even want to tell me things. Now I learn that they share something so… personal.” My voice muffled by his shirt. He kisses the top of my head and I calm. I push away from him; this situation is too emotional to be in his arms. With the pads of his thumbs, he wipes my tears.

  “Don’t let that old hag get to you okay? You’re amazing and he loves you.” His words calm me further and I have no idea why Lucien is so weary of Jayce. Somehow, I know that Jayce isn’t lying to me. If there was something going on between Sasha and Lucien, he would tell me. Taking a deep breath, I try to stop my hands from shaking. This is too much; Lucien needs to tell me the truth. I can’t handle more surprises. He will have to open up to me sometime.

  “Thanks, Jay, after my past, I find it difficult trusting anyone.” His blue eyes sear into my brown ones. The sincere concern I see in his face makes me smile.

  “Come on, let’s get a drink.” He rises from the stair and offers a hand to me. As soon as he pulls me up I am standing in front of him. He wraps an arm around my neck in a friendly gesture. We walk out to find Kenna and Lucien standing in the foyer. My body shivers at the sadness on his face. I can see he’s worried, but that’s not what I notice. It’s the glare he’s giving Jayce that has me trembling.