The Matter Is Life

by J. California Cooper

  He answered, “And I love you!”

  Again, it was her turn to look to the side. “I mean … loved … with my body.”

  The little man didn’t give up yet. “You are a fool! To wish to stay here in this forsaken place. Is love here? Don’t be a fool! I must return to my home, my business. If you wish to return … soon … you may call on me. But it must be SOON! Don’t wait … too long.”

  The next day Man flew out from the nearest airport. Their last words were:

  Him, “I think you have used me.”

  Her, “We have used each other.”

  Him, “I think you may be overpaid.”

  Her, “You do not like used or cheap. And I was … not paid. I care for you. How can you pay for that? I was more than willing.”

  He, “With lies … who knows? Be happy with … the loved one.” They looked into each other’s eyes just before he turned to go. He handed her a package. She kissed him. Said, “There are a million like me for you.”

  He said, “You cannot count for my heart.”

  Then he was gone.

  Durin the time of the buildin, Lovedora had moved back home with two of her children, Pandora and a son. The two other boys was workin on little jobs they had, while the time ran out for the bank to take the house. They was gonna drive up in their dad’s old car later.

  Lovedora was coughin a lot, that little dry cough with the specks of blood endin up on them clean white rags that Dora kept up for her. Dora cried over that child practly dyin in fronta her eyes. Lovedora had lost a lot of weight! Didn’t have much to start with. Splendora looked at her and shook her head sadly. Said, “Hold on, sister, hold on.”

  Then Windora came. Goldora brought her, then went on back to school somewhere. I know it was a good school cause it was private. Windora couldn’t sew anymore, cept sometimes in the mornin light, her eyesight was so bad. Was really blind, cept for one eye that as she used it, got dimmer and dimmer through the day. She had money, but she was goin blind right on. Nothin the doctors could do, she said, and she couldn’t get no new eyes.

  Endora was already here, you know that, and she was always over to see her sisters. To admire their clothes, all cept Lovedora, who only had love, mmh! mmh! Sometimes a person don’t know what to do, one way or another. Anyway, Endora was gettin all her information bout schools and things for Freedora. She wanted the best for her, she said.

  Dora was mostly layin down with her back trouble what come from her kidneys what the doctor said was tryin to fail. She love to watch her children. Them that had dreamed and done something in their own way. Her eyes just fill up with tears, but she was happy. She sure would love to live in that beautiful house with her daughters, Lovedora and Splendora, and whatever grandchild she could get hold to. In her heart, she didn’t blive she was gonna live long enough to do none of that!

  Now! So much was happenin all at one time, if I say it all together you never would understand what I was talkin bout! So, I have to tell you all one thing at a time. Just keep in mind it all happen at bout the same time!

  Chile! All them Doras!

  First, I was so glad to have my artist son home. He was happy! Clubfoot, short leg and all! Thank God! He did beautiful work and showed me catalogues of his work in different places in Europea. Said soon America might know him. He had brought me two beautiful big picture-paintings. They was too beautiful for my house. One was a sunrise over water someplace in Italy, he said, Port-oh-something, and the other was of trees and a wide street with busy, good-lookin people, in Paris, he say. And he had put me in that one! There I was walkin down that street I hadn’t done ever seen! He said I could go there if I want to! Someday. Chile, I ain’t never gonna fly over all that water! Sides, I’m already there in that picture-paintin! If I wanna lie I can prove I been to Paris cause you can see me right there!

  Then … my dentist and veterary came. Lord, them three children was happy to see each other. I looked at them and cried, thinkin of the ones I had lost. The other three of mine, livin, that had never had no dreams came over, but they didn’t get along with each other too good. They want to fuss and talk smart bout my dreamer children tryin to be uppity or somethin! Chile, I don’t know bout blood bein thicker all the time.

  Round that time Splendora took to goin to some special doctors over at the city just outa town here. Then bout three weeks later, she had Dora, Lovedora and Windora go with her.

  Now … here’s what happen. Splendora was plannin the whole thing. She was payin for everything! Probly with what that Man had give her in that package he left. In another month … they was all goin in the hospital. Splendora first. Then Lovedora. Seems Splendora was gonna give up a lung from her beautiful body for her sister so she could live. She did that.

  Then bout a month later Windora went to the hospital. Splendora was gonna give up a eye from that beautiful face for her sister so she could see. She did that.

  Last, Dora went. Splendora had them take one of her kidneys from her now cut-up beautiful body, so her mama could live a little longer, if it took. It took. Splendora did that.

  Earlier, they had tried to fight her doin that, but they was happy in their hearts. Who don’t want to live?

  Love, love, love. What won’t it do!? Oh Lord, Jesus and God!

  Well, that all took bout three months more. When it was all over, they rolled each one, Lovedora first, into that new house to get well. Her kids was there to help her. Good thing, they was home! Soon some color and life was back in Lovedora’s sad, happy face. She was gonna do fine!

  By time Windora came home, Goldora just demanded to be there with her mama from school. Windora was so happy bout that eye, she cried, til the doctor told her to stop or she could ruin that good eye she just got. She stopped. Dried right up. Mostly.

  Dora came home on a stretcher. Her and Splendora stayed the longest in the hospital. But finally they let Dora out. Endora was payin somebody to take care of her right. Even makin Freedora help cause it’s her family too!

  Splendora finally came home, bout a month later after Dora. They had held her the longest cause her body had been in shock or somethin! Everybody was all in the hall waitin for her. Dora was in a wheelchair. They brought Splendora home in a wheel chair. My son, Walton, was there. I wish I could tell you so you could see what I’m tryin to say. Everybody in some little pain, gettin well, happy and sad at the same time. Cryin for joy. Chile, chile.

  Splendora was rolled into her lovely hallway and they was all there, waitin. You could hear sniffin, wheezin and shufflin goin on. Splendora was worn, thin, weary and tired, but … she was smilin. Dried blood specks on her arms and sleeves where they done used them needles givin her things to build her up, keep her well, feed her. She in a little white robe with bandages all round her chest and back. You could see some bruises different places where that robe fell off a little. Even her slippers had little dried bits of blood and things on em. Her one eye was open bright, smilin like her lips. The other eye was wrinkled, closed and sunk in a bit. But the face! That face was happy … and still smilin … tho you sure could tell she had suffered and was in a little pain.

  I was so proud of her. So happy for them, for my friend. I blive I loved Splendora better than my own children for a minute. Oh! Splendora was splendid! She was!

  There Lovedora was, a little bent over, with her back still bandaged a bit, wheezin a little, her body gettin used to that new lung that was workin! There Windora was, bandages all round her head. Less now than last month. No eyes showin yet, arms stretched out to her sister who had give her new sight. She was cryin again, askin somebody to hand her to Splendora.

  Dora tryin to get out her wheel chair to take her Splendora in her arms. My son, Walton, held her down and wheeled them two chairs together, they grabbed each other’s hand and held on, tight. Patted each other with the other hand. Everybody else huggin them and each other too. Oh, it was a sight full of so much love. Not just cause they was a family, cause every family don’t do t
hem things. This was love just cause somebody was made that way.

  Endora was cryin, screamin, “I wanna give somebody somethin! I wanna give somebody somethin! Nobody didn’t ask me!”

  I told her, “Didn’t nobody ask Splendora. Your time might come, girl. You got a big family!” I was surprised when she hugged me. Love is catchin sometimes.

  Then, surprised me, my son Walton bent over, took Splendora’s hands and bent some more to kiss those dry, cracked lips. Then I knew he loved her. She smiled up at him. He knelt down, said to her, “It’s all done now. You are through with that dream.” She kept smilin and put her hand on his face, her head on his shoulder. See ain’t nothin cripple bout him but his foot!

  He turned to us, said, “Look here, you all. I want you to meet my future wife. We are gettin married soon as she can stand up.” She raised her head and smiled and the sun came out in that hall. Then I knew she loved him. My dear, clubfoot, cripple son who I never thought would ever be loved. Oh, where did Splendora get her heart?

  True to the words, when all was over and everybody was up and gettin round good, Walton and Splendora came down the aisle. Him, limpin and handsome in his tuxedo. Her with one eye (new one not in yet), back caved in on one side, in a beautiful lavender off-the-shoulder dress Windora had designed and had made for her. Her back scar showed a little bit. But … that little bent, cut, limpin couple look like they was the most beautiful, happiest people in the world. Everybody had a good time at the reception!

  They moved into the new house. Well, Walton did. Cause Splendora was already there fixin up a studio for him to do his work in.

  You may not blive this, after all Splendora had put her body through. But in a year, Splendora had a baby. Yes, you guess right. It was a girl. They named her Alldora. I said to myself, “Another Dora. Mmh! Mmh!”

  Me? Well … I got so much family now, I’m givin up marryin again. Not cause I’m too old. I’m just already happy. I love my family and my dearest friend, Dora. We all in the same family now! I’m part of a family goin SOMEWHERE! I’m proud to be close to her … out of all the people in this great big huge world.

  Let me tell you somethin else makes me happy, made Dora happy too. This year, when my doctor-dentist daughter had her a baby, she let me name it. I bet you laughin, thinkin bout what I would name it. I sure wouldn’t name it after me, my name is Rosie Mae. Ain’t that nothin!?

  Well, I’ll tell you what I named it. Things bein like they is, there is only one thing I COULD name that baby. I said to myself, there ain’t never been nothin in my life like a Dora. Maybe it will give my grandbaby somethin good, like they give to me. She a strong, lusty little girl. I watch her eyes, can see her thinkin already, can see she ain’t gonna be no fool.

  So, yes, that’s what I named her. A dora.

  Adora!

  So, maybe here we go again.

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  J. California Cooper is the author of three collections of stories—Some Soul to Keep, Homemade Love (a recipient of the 1989 American Book Award), and A Piece of Mine—as well as a novel, Family, and seventeen plays, many of which have been produced and performed on the stage, public television, radio, and college campuses. Her plays have also been anthologized, and in 1978 she was named Black Playwright of the Year for Strangers, which was performed at the San Francisco Palace of Fine Arts. Among her numerous awards are the James Baldwin Writing Award (1988) and the Literary Lion Award from the American Library Association (1988). Ms. Cooper lives in a small town in Texas, and is the mother of a daughter, Paris Williams.