Waiting to Lose

by Dawn L. Chiletz

  “Tell me,” he said when Rob answered.

  “You were drugged. There were traces of Ketamine in your system. There’s no other way they’d be there.”

  “Son of a bitch.” Jake shook his head.

  Rob continued, “We got more information on Peter’s supposed sister. It seems they weren’t blood related. Peter’s friend from grade school said that his mom was only married to her father for a few months until he found out she was using and divorced her. The stepsister was five years younger than him, but apparently he was infatuated with her and followed her everywhere. This ‘friend’ said it was creepy how he talked about her. He’d said something about how she was his family and how’d they be together forever. Even after their parents divorced, he kept trying to call her. She wanted nothing to do with him, but he never stopped trying.”

  “Can we talk to her and see what she knows?

  “I’m afraid we can’t.”

  “Why?” Jake asked nervously.

  “She died in a car accident ten years ago. Her name was Tessa Rose Thomas.”

  Jake felt the air leave his lungs as he heard her name. Tessa… Tessa Rose. Thomas Rose. Thomas Markum. Peter Markum. Everything fell into place. The girl he’d dated who crashed her car after he broke up with her. The one he killed with his selfishness was the stepsister of the man who tried to rape Madi. It all clicked in his head. His mind ebbed and flowed over everything he’d known about him before this.

  “Jake? Listen, I know this is major. I’m just as surprised as you are. But it all makes sense. The vendetta he has against you is because of her. It seems this friend also said he was devastated when she died. Said you’d taken away the love of his life and that you deserved to die, not her. I suppose he wanted to take Madi away from you.”

  Jake’s eyes closed as pain shot through him. He’d caused so much pain. Pain to Tessa, and her family, even Peter. And then there was Madi. This was all his fault. His sins were coming back to haunt him. Just as he said the words in his mind, his head clung to a memory.

  “Rob, there was a piece of hate mail I received. It always stayed with me, but I never knew why. See if you can get your hands on it. It said something about my sins and had the word crashed in it. I think it might be related.”

  “You’ve got it.”

  “There’s one more thing you need to know,” Rob said.

  Jake drew in a deep breath and held it. “Tell me.”

  “Ang was right. Greg and Caleb were talking outside your dressing room door in Melbourne, and Greg was holding a case of water in his arms. We’re going to find out why.”

  ***

  MADI PACED BACK and forth in front of an open glass door at her parent’s house. She straightened her long, shiny grey sweater over her black leggings and clicked the heels of her black boots together, like Dorothy wanting to go home. She played with her necklace in her fingers, glancing blankly into space. Her head bolted upright when she heard the whoosh of snow under approaching tires. It was just another snowplow. Six inches had fallen Wednesday morning, followed by an ice storm. Only in Chicago could it snow and thunder at the same time. Jake’s flight from L.A. Wednesday morning had been cancelled due to weather conditions. She was devastated. She’d been dying to be with him since he’d left her dorm, and now, as she paced in front of her parent’s door, she wondered if she’d see him at all.

  The last she’d spoken to him, five hours ago, he was sitting in first class, waiting for his plane to leave the runway.

  “I promise you, baby, I’ll be there today. If I have to buy my own plane and fly it myself, I will be there for Thanksgiving.”

  Madi glanced down at her phone. No missed messages. It was noon. He should have been there by now.

  “So how long have you two been dating?” Madi’s mother asked suspiciously from the kitchen, staring at Rob and Kendra.

  Rob’s hand rested uncomfortably on his neck as he glared at Kendra through the tops of his eyes.

  “It’s been weeks now,” Kendra stated happily, linking her arm into Rob’s and resting her head on his shoulder, playing the part a little too well. “Isn’t he just the cutest little sugar bear you ever saw?” she asked as she lifted her hand to squeeze Rob’s cheek with her fingers.

  Madi pursed her lips and giggled to herself as another car rushed down the street, causing hope and immediate disappointment.

  Kendra’s parents decided on a last-minute trip to Denver for Thanksgiving to visit some friends. They assumed Kendra would have plans, so they didn’t bother to include her. Madi hadn’t wanted her to sit home alone on Thanksgiving, so she insisted that she come along. They were going to say that Rob was Jake’s friend, coming in from L.A. with him. Jake’s flight being cancelled caused a change of plans. Jake offered the idea that they pretend Rob was Kendra’s new boyfriend. Madi loved it—and him—for being brilliant and for fueling Madi’s matchmaking operation. The idea of pretending had been met with a “Hell no!” from Kendra and a “You’ve got to be kidding me” from Rob, but Madi was able to use her need for them both to convince them there was no other way. Kendra was taking her role a little too seriously, and seemed to be enjoying making Rob as uncomfortable as possible.

  Madi felt her father’s arm slide around her shoulder. “He’ll be here, pumpkin. Stop worrying.”

  Madi smiled at him, nodding her head, pretending she believed it. She closed her eyes as he kissed the back of her head and trudged into the kitchen.

  “So, Rob,” Madi’s father began. “Are you a Bears fan? Cause if you’re not, you’re not allowed to sit near me during dinner.”

  “I’m a huge Bears fan, Mr. Ryan.” He shifted uncomfortably as Kendra placed her head back onto his shoulder and fanned her fingers up and down his back.

  Madi leaned on the doorframe and watched her father speak to Rob. Kendra turned toward her and grimaced to Madi as she twisted her arm into Rob’s once again.

  A car door slamming caused Madi to pivot toward the front door. Her eyes bulged out of her head as a smoking hot Jake, dressed in jeans, black lace-up boots, a button-down black wool coat, and a scarf draped around his neck, began his walk up the driveway. The limo pulled away. He was wearing sunglasses and carrying flowers. He looked like a model. He was the most beautiful man she’d ever seen. Madi bolted from the door, sliding in the driveway as she ran to him. He smiled as she approached and caught her as she flew into him, lifting her legs around his waist.

  “Happy Thanksgiving, baby,” he said, kissing her hair.

  Madi’s legs slid down him as she flung her hair away from his face and caught her breath. “Happy Thanksgiving,” she said, smiling up into his eyes.

  He bent his head down and planted a small, chaste kiss on her lips as his eyes moved toward her front door. Madi’s lips lingered in the air. “That’s it?” she questioned. “That’s my hello?”

  “Your father’s watching me,” he whispered as Madi’s head contorted around to face the door. She grinned and waved to her father, who stood with his hands crossed in front of his chest.

  Madi firmly held his waist as Jake lifted his arm around her, rubbing her shoulder as she shivered from the cold.

  He held out his hand as Mr. Ryan opened the door.

  “Mr. Ryan, thank you for having me. Happy Thanksgiving.”

  Steve Ryan shook his hand. “Are we back to formalities, Jake?” he asked.

  Jake smiled and Madi’s heart pounded in her chest as she watched him. She couldn’t believe he was finally here.

  “No, Steve. Habit, I suppose,” Jake responded.

  “Better a good habit than a bad one,” Steve said, holding the door as Jake entered the house. Madi mouthed, “Be nice to him,” at her father, and he grinned mischievously.

  “Jake!” Madi’s mother, Emily, shouted as she threw down her dishtowel and opened her arms to him. He hugged her as she planted a small kiss on his cheek. “These are for you,” he said, handing her the huge bouquet of flowers in his hand.


  “They’re beautiful, Jake. Thank you.”

  “No Lex?” Jake asked.

  “The dog is in the basement,” Mrs. Ryan stated as she sniffed the bouquet. “We didn’t want him jumping on everyone. Last year he ate a chunk out of the turkey when no one was looking.”

  Madi beamed when he turned slightly and winked at her. Jake handed his coat to Steve as Emily spoke.

  “Madi said you and Kendra had already been introduced, but this is Kendra’s new boyfriend, Rob Haster.”

  Jake held out his hand to Rob and they shook hands and nodded to each other, as if they’d just met.

  Jake smirked at Rob, who sighed in frustration at the situation.

  It took everything Madi had not to laugh.

  “Would you mind too terribly if I excused myself to use the restroom?” Jake asked.

  “Of course not,” Madi said. “I’ll walk you.” She took his hand and led him down the hall to the right, away from everyone in the kitchen, their voices fading away in the distance.

  “Here it is,” she said, pointing.

  Jake pulled her by the waist and into the wall behind her, locking his lips to hers. She moaned softly into his kiss as she wrapped her arms around him. The smell of his cologne and the taste of his minty lips caused her body to feel weak and needy at once. “I missed you,” he whispered as he kissed her.

  “Really?” she questioned. “I haven’t missed you at all,” she said flatly before smiling into his mouth.

  He lifted his eyes to hers, and even they were smiling.

  “Sorry it took me so long to get here. I had security at the airport but the press was relentless. I had to lose them.”

  Madi nodded as she played with the hem of his shirt. “How are you? Really? And don’t sugar coat things for me, because I’ll see right through you and it will just piss me off.”

  Jake huffed knowingly. “I’m okay. This whole thing with Peter and Tessa has me feeling confused and full of regret. I’ve put you through too much. I’m not quite sure why, after everything, you still wanted me here.”

  “Do you wish you hadn’t come?” she questioned.

  “Not for a second. But the press… It’s getting worse. Everywhere I go, they’re there. I had to hire a second car that looked the same to try to lose them. I’m worried they’re going to find you before you want to be found. I don’t want to mess things up for you more than I already have.”

  Madi’s eyebrows furrowed more with every word out of his mouth. “First of all, you haven’t messed anything up for me. Tessa was a huge part of your life. It’s not your fault that Peter’s crazy. It sounds like he was crazy before you’d even met Tessa.”

  Jake narrowed his eyes as she spoke and leaned against the wall.

  “And second, you haven’t put me through anything. I like being there for you,” she said, lifting her hand to touch his cheek. “I want to be someone you can depend on. I know I’ve put you through a lot too, with my doubts and insecurities. I can’t believe you came anyway.”

  “You are someone I can depend on, Mads,” he said as he removed her hand from his face and held it in his. “This year has been insane. I find the one person in the world that I can trust and find out everyone else can’t be trusted.”

  Madi studied him for a moment before nodding. “Did Rob’s people talk to Greg yet? Do they know if it’s him?”

  “Not yet. He’s flying out here on Monday to talk to us.”

  “You mean to talk to Rob?” she questioned. “Won’t you be gone by the time he arrives?”

  Jake smirked. “Let’s not talk about my leaving. I just got here. Are you ready for me to go already?”

  Madi smiled and shook her head. “If it were up to me, you’d never go. Speaking of going… Did you really need to use the bathroom?”

  “I do. Care to join me? You could get another look,” he said as his hand slipped below her sweater, grabbing her ass from behind.

  Madi shook her head and rolled her eyes. “I plan on looking a lot later.”

  “I’m holding you to that,” he said, kissing her quickly before closing the door.

  Madi leaned on the frame and bit her lip. She could hear him inside. He softly hummed as he used the bathroom. The thought of what was in his jeans made a quiver run through her legs.

  Kendra bounded down the hall. “This is ridiculous,” she spouted.

  Rob followed behind, obviously irritated.

  Jake opened the door to the two of them in hushed whispers, his eyes flipping between them and a quiet Madi.

  “He’s not even trying,” Kendra shouted in a hush to Madi as she folded her arms over her chest.

  Madi opened her mouth to speak, but Rob burst in. “I think you’re trying a little too hard,” he stated. “Are they even buying this line of crap? Sugar bear… come on!” he said as he rolled his eyes.

  “I’m sure they’re not,” Kendra said, facing him. “They know me. They know I’d never date someone like you, much less call you my boyfriend. You act like you can’t even stand to be in the same room with me. That’s not going to convince them we’re a couple. You suck at acting.”

  “You want me to act like I like you?” he spouted back into her face.

  “You could try to act like a normal human being! That would be a start!” Kendra shouted in a whisper into his face.”

  “Fine,” he muttered angrily.

  “Fine!” she returned. Rob grabbed her hand firmly and pulled her back into the kitchen. Kendra stumbled from the sudden yank he gave her as her six-inch heels almost caused her to tumble onto the floor.

  Jake and Madi glared at each other. Neither had said a single word.

  Jake gave a quick flinch of his head.

  Madi sighed. “This is going to be an interesting day.”

  Jake, Steve, and Rob sat around the television set, drinking beer and commenting on the Bears game, whooping, hollering and collectively sighing from one play to the next.

  Madi placed the sweet potatoes into the oven as her mother stirred the pot on the stove. Kendra sat at the table, inhaling a glass of wine.

  “Kendra, sweetheart,” Rob called. “Could you be a doll and bring me another beer?”

  Madi pursed her lips as she watched Kendra’s eyes gape before her posture stiffened. Madi’s mother went to the fridge and handed three bottles to Kendra, smiling skeptically. Kendra forced a small smile to Madi’s mother and gritted her teeth at Madi as she turned to make her delivery.

  Madi curled her head around the corner to watch. Jake immediately saw her and winked at her. His wink… Ugh. She bit her lip as she considered that one small movement from him could send her head spinning.

  Kendra handed a bottle to each of the men. Madi’s father said thanks, not taking his eyes off the screen. Jake grinned at her fake smile to him. When Kendra handed the bottle to Rob, he stared at her lovingly, making Madi’s heart clench. She’d never seen his face like that. He almost seemed sincere.

  “Thanks, honey,” he said, pulling her down to him. Kendra stumbled from the movement and fell into his lap. He grabbed her face and kissed her mouth. Kendra jerked slightly at first, but seemed to adjust into the kiss. Madi’s mouth fell open as she glared at Jake. He shrugged as he brought the bottle to his lips.

  Rob quickly released Kendra’s mouth as he pushed her forward out of his lap. She huffed for a moment before fluffing her short hair, regaining her composure. Rob licked his lips and watched her stumble up the stairs. He noticed Madi’s gaping mouth and gave her a small nod before turning his eyes back to the game.

  Kendra approached Madi as she wiped her mouth. “What the fuck was that?” Kendra asked.

  Madi shrugged in response. “How was it?” she nudged her inquisitively. Kendra seemed to taste her own lips as her eyes danced with confusion behind her lashes. “Umm, actually, not bad,” she replied, surprising even herself. “He’s taken this to a whole new level. I won’t be undone.”

  The front door swung open and a cold rush
of air caused Madi to grab her arms. “Let the party begin!” he exclaimed as he closed the door behind him. Madi smiled as she took in the sight of her brother Michael.

  “Ugh,” Kendra twisted away from the door, pouring herself another glass of wine.

  Madi’s mother did a double take at her before smiling and greeting her second oldest with open arms. “Michael! You’re home!” She kissed his cheek as Madi crossed her arms and watched.

  Steve, Jake and Rob followed the noise up the stairs. Jake pressed his cheek to hers from behind her. “Michael,” she whispered in his ear. He nodded.

  “Hey, baby sis,” he said to her as he dropped his bag on the floor, hugging his father.

  Madi shifted to him and he kissed her cheek and hugged her close. His eyes followed the floor to the top of Jake’s head. “This is the guy?” he asked.

  Madi turned proudly. “Mike, this is Jake. Jake, my brother Mike.”

  Jake held out his hand and Mike shook it. “So this is the singer who’s sleeping with Allison Gregory while he lulls my sister into a false sense of hope.”

  There was a collective sigh from everyone in the room as Jake furrowed his brows. Madi’s mother smacked Michael’s arm as she spoke. “We told you what Madi said, Michael. Now dammit! Don’t you dare ruin this holiday before it even starts.”

  Kendra took a gulp of wine. “Yeah, it was going along swimmingly before you showed up!”

  “Aww, shit, who the hell invited her?” he asked as he pointed to Kendra.

  Rob quietly huffed in amusement and Madi could tell there was an immediate bond between them. Michael had avoided Kendra like the plague since she turned him down two years ago. He turned to Rob as he snickered. “Who are you?” he asked.

  Madi interjected, “This is Kendra’s boyfriend, Rob.”

  Michael glared from Kendra, guzzling her wine, to Rob, who sighed as he nodded. Michael snorted as his voice rose. “Boyfriend? You poor son of a bitch!”