Chicken Soup for the Cancer Survivor's Soul
Page 26
3. Know Your Options.
Learn as much as you can about your particular kind of cancer—become an expert. It sounds obvious, but try to find out what the latest and most effective treatments are before you commit to treatment. (Most physicians are reluctant to change a course of therapy once you’ve started.)
Centers designated by the National Cancer Institute share the latest information with each other nationwide and can generally offer the newest options and the most advanced treatments.
4. Fight Back.
Keep asking questions throughout treatment and don’t take anything for granted. Make sure that you have a doctor, a hospital and a treatment plan you feel confident in—don’t just take someone else’s recommendations on trust.
Don’t worry about being a pest: experience shows that patients who aren’t intimidated by their disease are the ones most likely to get better.
Don’t think solely in terms of medical treatment. You may also need help with family, financial and spiritual issues.
Above all, don’t lose your sense of humor. Every day, look for a little pleasure and enjoyment to offset the hours consumed by treatment.
City of Hope*
* The City of Hope has been treating people with cancer for 50 years and is a Clinical Cancer Research Center designated by the National Cancer Institute. We know cancer and will take the time to help you. If you or someone you know has been recently diagnosed, call 1-800-826-HOPE to find out more about treatment available at the City of Hope. For general information about cancer, contact their CancerConnections® hotline at 1-800-678-9990. Cancer doesn’t care. We do.® (If you would like to reproduce “How to Beat Cancer” for any purpose, please call the City of Hope at 818-359-8111.)
Celebrate Life!
What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matter compared to what lies within us.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Dear Mercy Hospital Patients, Employees and Visitors:
In early June, I was the speaker at our annual National Cancer Survivor Day picnic. This year’s theme was CELEBRATE LIFE. I took each letter and found a concept to suit it. When I shared the outline of my talk with Mary, my niece, she replied, “Aunt Sue, what you said can apply to anyone—not just people with cancer.” Thus, I share CELEBRATE LIFE.
COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS, NOT YOUR WORRIES.
I found this on a little prayer card. It doesn’t mean that worries won’t come, but when they do, just don’t count them. Focus on blessings instead. Choose to see a glass half full, not half empty.
EXPRESS YOUR FEELINGS HONESTLY.
Cancer evokes varied emotional reactions.Respect whatever they are honestly. Above all, stay real, concentrating on what’s best for you.Don’t try to please others by hiding authentic feelings in order to make others feel better.
LEARN TO LAUGH AND LAUGH TO LEARN.
Someone once said that laughter is the best medicine. It is! I’ve come to believe that a sense of humor is as vital as the first five senses (sight, touch, taste, smell, hearing). Having a positive attitude doesn’t require smiling all the time, but there is a definite link between our basic attitude and our immune system that is too important to ignore.
ENDURE WHAT IS NECESSARY.
Yes, there’s tough stuff in your coping with disease. But never forget the patient who told me her mother always said, “From the day that you’re born ‘til they take you in a hearse, things are never so bad that they couldn’t be worse.”
BE OPEN ANDFLEXIBLE ...GO WITH THE FLOW.
Find meaning in the day-by-day doings because little things mean a lot. Ponder the adage, “They who have a why to live can bear almost any how.” Cancer is a wake-up call that jolts us out of our complacency.
REMAIN IN CHARGE BY NETWORKING WITH FAMILY AND DOCTORS.
Work with doctors not as a victim but as a partner. Trust your body signals for better or worse.You have a right to retain an appropriate degree of control in what’s happening.
ACCEPT AND FACE YOUR MORTALITY.
This can be as low and painful process that takes time and effort. Cancer does provide a new awareness of life’s previous quality through its unique lens. Death is certain for all of us, but how we live out our remaining days is up to us.
TREASURE EACH DAY AND EACH NEW EXPERIENCE.
No, I wouldn’t have chosen cancer on the menu of health struggles, but I would not trade all I’ve learned, lived, laughed and loved because of it.One marvelous side effect has been connection with incredibly beautiful people. I believe you can turn your back on negativity that wants to drag you down.
EXERCISE BODY, MIND AND SPIRIT AS ABLE.
In the new book, Remarkable Recovery, by Caryle Hirshberg and Marc Ian Barasch, seven common factors among the survivors are discussed: the will to live, acceptance of the disease but not the outcome, working with doctors as collaborators, having supportive people around, improving diet, exercising more, and finding faith important in recovery.
LIVE REMEMBERING THAT LIFE IS A MYSTERY TO BE LIVED, NOT A PROBLEM TO BE SOLVED.
As you search for answers, reasons, whys and why nots, remember there is a dimension of all this that remains a mystery. Sometimes health struggles invite us to reverence instead of grueling analysis.
INVEST IN YOUR INNER RESOURCES:COURAGE, EFFORT, DETERMINATION, FAITH, HOPE AND LOVE.
All of these nurture the will to live and flourish. Surprise yourself by opting to maximize who you are by practicing these virtuous behaviors.
Intravenous Chicken Soup for the Soul®
Reprinted with permission from Dave Carpenter.
FIND THE FUTURE IN YOUR NOW.
Maybe you’ve wondered if you’d make it today—you’re here! Select short-term goals as your ongoing link to life. Meditate on the “Family Circus” cartoon that says, “Yesterday’s the past, tomorrow’s the future, but today is a gift. That’s why it’s called the present.” Sink your heart into that one.
EMERGE AS A WINNER—NOT A VICTIM OR
More Chicken Soup?
Many of the stories and poems you have read in this book were submitted by readers like you who had read earlier Chicken Soup for the Soul books. We publish at least five or six Chicken Soup for the Soul books every year. We invite you to contribute a story to one of these future volumes.
Stories may be up to 1,200 words and must uplift or inspire. You may submit an original piece or something you clip out of a local newspaper, a magazine, a church bulletin or a company newsletter. It could also be your favorite quotation that you’ve put on your refrigerator door or a personal experience that has touched you deeply.
Just send a copy of your stories and other pieces to the following address:
Chicken Soup for the Soul
P.O. Box 30880
Santa Barbara, CA 93130
fax: 805-563-2945
Web sites: www.chickensoup.com
www.clubchickensoup.com
We will be sure that both you and the author are credited for your submission.
For information about speaking engagements, other books, audiotapes, workshops and training programs, please contact the authors directly.
Who Is Jack Canfield?
Jack Canfield is one of America’s leading experts in the development of human potential and personal effectiveness. He is both a dynamic, entertaining speaker and a highly sought-after trainer. Jack has a wonderful ability to inform and inspire audiences toward increased levels of self-esteem and peak performance.
He is the author and narrator of several bestselling audio-and videocassette programs, including Self-Esteem and Peak Performance, How to Build High Self-Esteem, Self-Esteem in the Classroom and Chicken Soup for the Soul—Live. He is regularly seen on television shows such as Good Morning America, 20/20 and NBC Nightly News. Jack has coauthored numerous books, including the Chicken Soup for the Soul series, Dare to Win and The Aladdin Factor (all with Mark Victor Hansen), 100 Ways to Build Self-Concept in the Classroom (with Haro
ld C. Wells) and Heart at Work (with Jacqueline Miller).
Jack is a regularly featured speaker for professional associations, school districts, government agencies, churches, hospitals, sales organizations and corporations. His clients have included the American Dental Association, the American Management Association, AT&T, Campbell Soup, Clairol, Domino’s Pizza, GE, ITT, Hartford Insurance, Johnson & Johnson, the Million Dollar Roundtable, NCR, New England Telephone, Re/Max, Scott Paper, TRW and Virgin Records. Jack is also on the faculty of Income Builders International, a school for entrepreneurs.
Jack conducts an annual eight-day Training of Trainers program in the areas of self-esteem and peak performance. It attracts educators, counselors, parenting trainers, corporate trainers, professional speakers, ministers and others interested in developing their speaking and seminar-leading skills.
For further information about Jack’s books, tapes and training programs, or to schedule him for a presentation, please contact:
The Canfield Training Group
P.O. Box 30880 • Santa Barbara, CA 93130
phone: 805-563-2935 • fax: 805-563-2945
or at America Online at keyword chickensoup.
Who Is Mark Victor Hansen?
Mark Victor Hansen is a professional speaker who, in the last 20 years, has made over 4,000 presentations to more than 2 million people in 32 countries. His presentations cover sales excellence and strategies; personal empowerment and development; and how to triple your income and double your time off.
Mark has spent a lifetime dedicated to his mission of making a profound and positive difference in people’s lives. Throughout his career, he has inspired hundreds of thousands of people to create a more powerful and purposeful future for themselves while stimulating the sale of billions of dollars worth of goods and services.
Mark is a prolific writer and has authored Future Diary, How to Achieve Total Prosperity and The Miracle of Tithing. He is coauthor of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series, Dare to Win and The Aladdin Factor (all with Jack Canfield) and The Master Motivator (with Joe Batten).
Mark has also produced a complete library of personal empowerment audio-and videocassette programs that have enabled his listeners to recognize and use their innate abilities in their business and personal lives. His message has made him a popular television and radio personality, with appearances on ABC, NBC, CBS, HBO, PBS and CNN. He has also appeared on the cover of numerous magazines, including Success, Entrepreneur and Changes.
Mark is a big man with a heart and spirit to match—an inspiration to all who seek to better themselves.
For further information about Mark write:
P.O. Box 7665
Newport Beach, CA 92658
phone: 949-759-9304 or 800-433-2314
fax: 949-722-6912
Web site: http://www.chickensoup.com
Who Is Patty Aubery?
Now vice-president of The Canfield Training Group and Self-Esteem Seminars, Inc., Patty Aubery remembers the early days of Jack Canfield’s work—before Chicken Soup for the Soul took the country by storm. Jack was still telling these heartwarming stories then, in his trainings, workshops and keynote presentations, which Patty scheduled and coordinated.
Later, she directed the labor of love that went into compiling and editing the original 101 Chicken Soup stories, and went on to support the daunting marketing effort and steadfast optimism required to bring it to millions of readers worldwide.
Though Patty can’t claim the title of bestselling author, noted authority, or even nationally recognized speaker, over 5 million copies have now been sold of the bestselling books that were brought to print with her unique combination of hard work, judgment and insight.
Recently, Patty coauthored the series’ fifth and latest offering, Chicken Soup for the Cancer Survivor’s Soul. Of the effort, Patty says, “I’m always encouraged, amazed and humbled by the story-tellers I meet when I work on any Chicken Soup book, but the overwhelming courage, enduring faith and profound wisdom I encountered from Surviving Soul contributors will stay with me forever.”
Patty is married to successful entrepreneur Jeff Aubery and together they have a young son, J.T. Aubery. A native of Southern California and an outstanding asset to Jack Canfield’s training organization and the Chicken Soup phenomenon, Patty and her family make their home in Santa Barbara. She can be reached at:
The Canfield Training Group
P.O. Box 30880
Santa Barbara, CA 93130
805-563-2935
fax: 805-563-2945
Who Is Nancy Mitchell?
Nancy Mitchell is director of publishing for The Canfield Group. She graduated from Arizona State University in May of 1994 with a Bachelor of Science in Nursing.
After graduation, Nancy worked at Good Samaritan Regional Medical Center in Phoenix, Arizona, in the Cardiovascular Intensive Care Unit. Four months after graduation, Nancy moved back to her native town of Los Angeles. Her sister and coauthor, Patty Aubery, offered her a part-time job working for Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen. Nancy’s intentions were to help finish A 2nd Helping of Chicken Soup for the Soul and then return to nursing. However, in December of that year, she was asked to continue on full-time at The Canfield Group. Nancy put nursing on hold and became the director of publishing, working closely with Jack and Mark on all Chicken Soup for the Soul projects.
Nancy says that right now what she is most thankful for is her move back to L.A. “If I hadn’t moved back to California, I wouldn’t have had the chance to be there for my mom during her bout with breast cancer. Right now my priority is to be there for my mom and for my family.”
Nancy has recently relocated to Santa Barbara with The Canfield Group and can be reached at:
The Canfield Group
P.O. Box 30880
Santa Barbara, CA 93130
800-237-8336
fax: 805-563-2945
Who Is Beverly Kirkhart?
Beverly Kirkhart knows what it means to live everyday to its fullest. Facing personal and professional hardships, as well as overcoming breast cancer eight years ago, she now shares the wisdom of her experiences in her heart-to-heart speaking engagements. Beverly has been a keynote speaker at universities and colleges, nonprofit organizations, corporations and hospitals across the country. She’s been on national radio and television delivering her message of “tuning setbacks into comebacks!” She is the author of the wildly acclaimed, My Healing Companion, a revealing self-guided journal designed to help those dealing with cancer become their own heroes.
Beverly delivers a powerful message with a personal touch. She identifies ways a person can stay strong, productive and upbeat during challenging times and beyond. From self-discovery to meditation, to asking for and giving support—and more—Beverly offers practical and proven ways professionals, caregivers, cancer patients, and others can turn their setbacks into comebacks and emerge as strong more positive people.
Beverly is the president and a founding member of the Breast Resource Center of Santa Barbara, along with Dr. Susan Love, a renowned surgeon and author of Dr. Susan Love’s Breast Book. She has dedicated her time in the development of several projects, which give hope and inspiration to those struggling with life-threatening disease. These include the first “Body-Mind-Spirit” program, sponsored by Cottage Hospital, featuring Dr. Carl Simonton and “The Looking Good, Feeling Good,” fashion show sponsored by the American Cancer Society and Nordstrom.
Beverly, a Santa Barbara residence, loves life and finds enjoyment in both her work and play. She is an avid bicyclist, equestrian rider and skier.
To invite Beverly Kirkhart to speak for your conference or event, write or call:
32 W. Anapamu Street, Ste. #246
Santa Barbara, CA 93101
Phone: (805) 966-1249, Fax: (805) 962-7269
E-mail: bevmktg@aol.com
Contributors
Many of the stories in this book were taken from books we have read.
These sources are acknowledged in the Permissions section. Most of the stories and poems were contributed by cancer survivors, many of whom are professional speakers. If you would like to contact them for information on their books, tapes and seminars, you can reach them at the address and phone numbers provided below.
Many of the stories were also contributed by readers like yourself, who responded to our request for stories. We have included information about them as well.
Roberta Andresen has been active in the business world her whole adult life, holding positions ranging from clerical to managerial. She is the author of My Daddy Died. She is available to speak to any size group and can be reached by calling 800-749-2550.
Maggie Bedrosian is a business owner and executive coach, specializing in helping people produce focused results with natural ease. She is the author of three books, including Life Is More Than Your To-Do List: Blending Business Success with Personal Satisfaction. Maggie is the past president of the American Society for Training and Development, Washington, D.C., chapter, and also chaired the Writing/Publishing Group of the National Speakers Association. You can contact Maggie by calling 301-460-3408.
Harold H. Benjamin, Ph.D., conceived of the breakthrough “patient active” concept based on his experience in dealing with psychological and emotional aspects of cancer. He founded The Wellness Community in 1982 as a no-cost program for cancer patients. Harold can be reached at The Wellness Community—National, 2716 Ocean Park Blvd., Suite 1040, Santa Monica, CA 90405, 310-314-2555
Louise Biggs is married and has three sons. When her older sons were in college, she decided to join them and received her teaching degree in 1982 at the age of 42. She has been teaching fifth grade for 13 years. She enjoys an active church life, camping, hiking, quilting, basket weaving, and doll-making. She can be reached at 4616 Old Stage Rd., Pulaski, VA 24301, or call 540-980-4016.