Rock Chick Renegade

by Ashley, Kristen

  “That isn’t smart.”

  “I don’t give a fuck.”

  “I real y don’t think –”

  “I’l be at your house at five to eight. We’re on the Harley tonight. Pack a bag.”

  “Real y, I think, after the party –”

  “You’re in my bed tonight. I want your scent on my sheets.”

  Oh my God.

  “Vance,” I said again, this time it sounded like a plea.

  “Five to eight,” he repeated.

  Then he disconnected.

  I stood there, back to the door and kept the dead phone to my ear.

  Then I slid down the door, ass to the floor, knees pointed to the ceiling, hands on my knees and I stared into space, forcing my mind blank, tel ing myself I could do this and tomorrow it would be over and my life would be back to normal.

  Myself didn’t real y believe I could do this and it didn’t much like the idea of normal.

  Chapter Fifteen

  You Got a New Partner Now

  I was on my back on the mat on the floor in the “down room” at the Nightingale Investigations office.

  It was a big room with a couch, TV, treadmil , weights and an exercise bike and the guys used it for down time or when they were hanging around on cal (only the bad boys at Nightingale Investigations would cal a room with workout equipment the “down room”).

  And of course the mat on the floor where Luke was kicking my ass.

  “You’re not focused,” Luke said, standing over me, staring down at me, hands on his hips.

  He was right, I wasn’t focused. My mind was everywhere but there. Heavy would be disappointed.

  Luke was good. He knew far more moves than Heavy, was stronger, faster and constantly surprising me. Stil , even as a novice I knew more than I was showing.

  “Get your head in the game,” Luke continued, bending and offering me his hand to help me up for about the twenty-fourth time.

  I nodded mutely, locked my fingers around his wrist, put my other hand to his forearm and then I gave a solid jerk, hoping to take him by surprise and take him down just once for the sake of my pride.

  His feet were planted. He stood strong only his arm and shoulder moving with my jerk which was disappointing. The corner of his lip went up on one side, he yanked me up and I found my feet. I immediately shifted my weight to one leg, threw my other calf around the backs of his and tagged him behind the knees. They buckled but he released my hand, his other arm went around my waist and he twisted.

  We both went down, his arm tightened around my waist, the other hand went out to shield our fal . I landed in a poor strategic position on my back, him on top of me, his ful weight pressing me into the mat. My legs were incapacitated and if he hadn’t cushioned our fal my head would have slammed against the mat and his weight would have knocked the wind out of me.

  His head came up and he gave me a half-grin. “Better,” he said.

  “Thanks,” I said back.

  “You’re stil fucked.”

  “I kinda noticed that,” I told him.

  “Don’t go out on the street with your mind on the mal .”

  “My mind isn’t on the mal . I’ve already done the mal and my party outfit is bril iant.”

  He just stared at me looking like he might laugh and I noticed his dark eyes weren’t brown or black like I thought.

  They were a deep, dark blue.

  Wow.

  “You wanna get up?” I asked, pushing thoughts about his eyes to the very back recesses of my mind so as never to pul them up again and placing my hands on his biceps to push him.

  “Not particularly,” he said casual y like he could lie on top of me al night which he probably could.

  Hmm.

  Not good.

  “Wel , I want you to get up,” I said.

  “It’s good to want things.”

  “Luke, get off me.”

  “How solid are you and Vance?” he asked.

  It was my turn to stare. “Why?”

  “Just answer the question.”

  “Why?”

  “‘Cause I’m thinkin’ not many men want their woman roaming the streets at night lookin’ for trouble, no matter if she can handle a gun and herself. I don’t see a good future for you two unless you get your ass back to that Shelter and your mind on what you real y can do to help those kids.” One thing you could say for that, it sure was honest.

  “Wel , then you’l be pleased to know we broke up today.

  We’re only going to the party together because we made a deal.”

  I passed the torch and it was his turn to stare then for some strange reason he started to look a little angry.

  “That didn’t take long,” he murmured as if to himself.

  “Shit happens. Now, get off.”

  The door opened and both of our heads twisted to it.

  Vance was standing there. He stood frozen for a beat, hand on the door knob.

  Then his arms crossed on his chest, his eyes went hard and his face got scary. “What… the… fuck?” His voice was low and as scary as his face.

  Luke looked at Vance then he looked at me. Luke’s face was blank but his eyes were active and I could tel he was thinking about something.

  I looked back at Vance. “He’s showing me some moves,” I told Vance.

  “Yeah, I can see,” Vance replied.

  Um.

  Yikes.

  Luke knifed off me and then grabbed my forearm and pul ed me up to stand close to him. I didn’t move away because there were crackling-not-happy vibes floating around the room and I didn’t want to do anything to set them off. And anyway, I was feeling very weird around Vance. I’d broken up with him, he’d kind of accepted it yet we weren’t through. I’d become used to him being around, getting in my space, descending into what had become a familiar banter. This was just weird. It felt foreign, uncomfortable, wrong.

  We al stared at each other.

  Then Luke said, “You two over after the party?” Vance’s eyes sliced to Luke. My lungs squeezed painful y, my eyes widened and moved to him too.

  Vance didn’t answer. Neither did I.

  “You’re through with Law then you won’t mind me movin’

  in,” Luke said, clearly not worried about fanning the flames of the crackling-not-happy vibes.

  Oh my God.

  I continued staring at Luke with wide eyes but my mouth had now dropped open.

  “You move in, we have problems,” Vance returned softly.

  “You move out, don’t seem like it’s much of your business.”

  The crackling vibes got red-hot.

  It was time for me to say something. “Excuse me but I am in the room,” I snapped. “I thought you said not many men like their women roaming the streets looking for trouble?” I pointed out to Luke.

  “Yeah, I did. Though I think it’s kinda cute,” Luke replied.

  Oh my God.

  “Wel hurray for you but come tomorrow, you boys are off the job. I’m a single-act show again,” I returned.

  “You’re in for trainin’ tomorrow, same time,” Luke shot back.

  “No fucking way.”

  “Only a girl would turn her back on a good deal just because she got fucked in the process.”

  “News flash, Luke, I am a girl,” I returned heatedly, hands going to my hips.

  “Yeah,” he grinned, leaning back, “I noticed that.” Vance moved. Luke and I swung our eyes to him and I realized too late the red-hot vibes went white.

  His movement wasn’t distinguishable. He was stil standing, arms crossed on his chest, but something about him went hostile.

  I waited. Luke (thankful y) was silent. The room burned.

  Then Vance said, eyes on me, “Five to eight.” Then he was gone.

  I whirled on Luke. “What in the hel was that al about?” He just grinned at me.

  “Stop grinning,” I demanded.

  “Tomorrow, after training, you and I patrol.” />
  “I don’t think so.”

  “I do. You aren’t going to learn shit on a mat. You gotta learn in the field.”

  “I said no.”

  He kept grinning. “You got a new partner now.” I rol ed my eyes to the ceiling.

  These guys.

  * * * * *

  I wore a little black dress to the party. And it was little.

  It seemed like a good idea at the time, before the flowers, before my freak out, when I was in a happy birthday daze.

  It wasn’t a good idea now.

  I’d gone home from training, packed a backpack (better for the Harley), showered, done the whole makeup and hair bit. Subtle makeup, it was al I knew how to do and my hair was up in a messy twist, which I didn’t know how to do but luckily, after five tries, it worked.

  During the mal extravaganza as birthday presents Roxie bought me this lotion that made my legs look shiny and ultra-smooth. Jet had given me three kinds of flavored lip gloss (I’d made the mistake of tel ing her about Vance’s

  “you smel of melons and taste of cherries” comment and she got a bit overexcited), bubble gum, grape and of course cherry (I went with grape for the evening).

  My dress was clingy black jersey, to the knee, halter-necked, the front fel in a drape, low on my cleavage, the back also had a drape, super-low, exposing most of the smal of my back. My shoes were spike-heeled, pointed-toe, open sides but with a ful back and a thick strap across the very top of my foot, just under the ankle.

  I went with bare (Roxie-lotion-shiny) legs, my new bracelet on my wrist and Auntie Reba’s diamond at my neck.

  I was fil ing Boo’s food bowl, tel ing him he had to be a good kitty until I got home the next day when Vance walked in the backdoor.

  I straightened and stared at him.

  Hair back, leather jacket, black cowboy boots, thick black belt with a heavy silver buckle, jeans and a crisp shirt with subtle stripes of wine, navy, midnight and charcoal patterned into it. The shirt was opened at the throat.

  At the sight of him my mouth went dry.

  “You gonna be able to ride on the Harley in that?” he asked.

  I decided a snotty, “Wel , hel o to you too,” was no longer in order. I wasn’t sure, as I’d had no experience but I figured I’d lost the right to bicker when I told him we had to stop seeing each other.

  I also decided to ignore the clench in my gut that he didn’t rush me against the counter and kiss me like last time.

  “It’s stretchy,” I answered.

  His eyes moved the length of me then came back to mine. I couldn’t read them.

  “Get a jacket,” he replied. “Where’s your bag?” I put on my black leather blazer and the backpack and we rode to Fortnum’s.

  The lights were blazing in Fortnum’s windows and I could see the place was already packed. I was a little shocked; they’d only planned the party the night before and spent most of the afternoon with me at the mal and the Shelter.

  I hopped off the back of the bike, rearranged my skirt and then Vance slid the backpack down an arm. I whirled with it as he pul ed it off the other side and I ended up facing him. He threw it over one of his shoulders.

  I looked up at him. His face was blank. My stomach had decided to settle into a permanent, painful twist.

  I turned away, biting my lip and feeling the weight in my chest that threatened tears.

  The sooner we got in there, the sooner the party would be over, the sooner the night would be over, the sooner I could face whatever chal enge the next day brought.

  Or move to Nicaragua.

  Vance caught my wrist and swung me back around, his body moving toward me at the same time so I col ided with it.

  He dropped my wrist, his arm went around me inside my jacket and his hand dipped straight into the drape at my back.

  My lips parted and his other hand went into my hair, pul ed out the clip and my hair fel over his hand and my shoulders.

  “Crowe! It took me five tries to twist that thing in my hair.” I forgot about not bickering.

  He ignored my comment. “You get the idea to experiment with flirtin’ in front of me, think again. I won’t like it and you’l be the one who’l pay.”

  I closed my eyes, sucked in a breath then opened them again. “Can we just get through the night?” I asked.

  “We’l get through the night,” he promised and something in that promise made me shiver.

  He stared at me, hand at my behind, other one in my hair.

  I became conscious of the fact that anyone could see us from the windows.

  “Can you take your hand off my ass?” I asked, al owing myself a little shade of snotty. We were standing on a public street and in ful view of the windows and Nick might be in there.

  Instead of doing as I asked, he pul ed me deeper into him and he kissed me. This wasn’t a soft, sweet kiss but deep, hard and ful -on tongue.

  When he quit kissing me, he whispered, “Grape,” against my lips and his eyes looked in mine.

  My stomach lurched painful y into a tighter knot at the memory of a better time.

  I held my breath wondering why I gave into tonight, to the party, Vance, everything. I was so much better on my own, dinners with Nick, Boo as my bed partner and my music to keep my company.

  Before I could find an answer to my mental question, Vance released me, grabbed my hand and we walked in.

  Everyone yel ed happy birthday.

  Even though I felt like crying, I did my very best to smile.

  * * * * *

  “Methinks, even with the mini-make-out-session on the sidewalk, al is not wel in paradise,” Tod said, standing beside me, both of us holding glasses of champagne. It was an hour into the party and I was trying to have fun (and not succeeding). They’d decided on baked Camembert and crackers, fruit trays, crudités, champagne and truffles. Al the men (including everyone from Nightingale Investigations, except a guy I hadn’t yet met named Ike who had night duty in the control room) were there and wearing jeans and nice shirts or sweaters (though Tod and Stevie wore casual suits and Tex wore one of his normal flannel shirts). Al the women were dressed to the nines, little dresses, lots of hair and makeup.

  Nick was there and seemed to be enjoying himself.

  Heavy and Zip were also there and both seemed a bit uncomfortable. Frank was a no show, not exactly the most sociable person one-on-one, he might have been able to do beers at a bar but parties were a no go.

  Tex surprised me because he was with a pretty blonde lady and they looked close. I wouldn’t have expected Tex to have a date, especial y not a pretty blonde lady. I was further surprised (a nice way to say absolutely floored) to find out she was Jet’s mother, Nancy.

  Duke surprised me by showing up at al . He brought his wife, Dolores, and she was a cracker.

  Jet and Eddie had yet to arrive.

  I was avoiding Vance like I’d forgotten to wear deodorant (I hadn’t) and I didn’t want him to find out.

  I was avoiding Luke because Luke was a wildcard. I didn’t want him to flirt with me then me be the one to pay.

  Vance looked seriously unhappy. Luke looked seriously amused.

  I looked to Tod and he was watching me closely.

  “Everything’s fine,” I assured him.

  “Liar, liar, pants on fire,” Tod said.

  “No real y, it is.”

  “Girlie, pu-lease. I had a hot guy like that I’d be al over him, embarrassing my friends enough to leave early so I could real y be al over him.”

  “You do have a hot guy like that,” I told him.

  “Not the same ten years on. You two are in the first blush of romance. You should be going at it like rabbits.”

  “I broke up with him,” I blurted, do not ask me why, I shouldn’t have and I knew it.

  Tod blinked at me, face shocked.

  See? I knew I shouldn’t have.

  “What?” he asked.

  “I broke up with him when I ran out of the room after I
saw the flowers. I cal ed him and broke up with him. We made a deal, he gets tonight then we’re over.”

  “You said you phoned to thank him,” Tod told me.

  “I kinda… um… fibbed.”

  Tod looked at me. He opened his mouth then closed it and looked away. Then he looked back, opened his mouth again and yel ed, “Are you fucking nuts? ” Most everyone turned to stare including, to my horror, Vance.

  I turned to Tod, my back to the room (and Vance). “Tod!

  Keep your voice down.”

  “Girl, that boy is hot for you, not to mention that boy is just plain hot.”

  “Tod –”

  “You need a doctor. You need an intervention. You need Daisy,” Tod said and started looking around the room.

  “No! Do not cal Daisy over here. Why do you think I fibbed to you earlier today? I didn’t want this kind of reaction.”

  “What’s going on?” Roxie hissed from beside us. She looked gorgeous, wearing a figure-skimming, strapless, little black dress of her own and her shoes were nearly as amazing as mine.

  “Jules broke up with Vance. It’s over. Done. Kaput,” Tod announced.

  “What? ” Roxie screeched.

  This time I felt the room’s attention on my back at Roxie’s outburst.

  I closed my eyes (I real y shouldn’t have told Tod) then I opened them. “Please, be quiet,” I begged.

  “Why did you break up with him?” Roxie asked in a low voice.

  “It’s too complicated to explain.”

  “But… he’s macho, he rides a Harley and he bought you flowers. Macho men who ride Harleys don’t buy women flowers. They take them to a roadhouse and get them drunk and get in their pants,” Roxie explained.

  “What’s happening?” Al y asked, she and Indy had arrived together.

  “Don’t tel them,” I said quickly.

  “Jules broke up with Vance. It’s over,” Roxie said over me.

  Both of them turned to stare at me.

  “That’s what she did after she saw the flowers,” Tod shared.

  “I thought you said you were thanking him,” Indy said.

  “She lied,” Tod told them.

  “Why on earth would you do that?” Al y (kind of) yel ed.