Reasons to Leave (Reasons #1)

by Lisa J. Hobman

  Reasons to Leave

  By

  Lisa J Hobman

  5 Prince Publishing

  Denver, CO

  This is a fictional work. The names, characters, incidents, places, and locations are solely the concepts and products of the author’s imagination or are used to create a fictitious story and should not be construed as real.

  5 PRINCE PUBLISHING AND BOOKS, LLC

  PO Box 16507

  Denver, CO 80216

  www.5PrinceBooks.com

  Digital ISBN 10:1631120913 ISBN-13:978-1-63112091-6

  Reasons to Leave

  Lisa J. Hobman

  Copyright Lisa J. Hobman 2015

  Published by 5 Prince Publishing

  Front Cover Viola Estrella

  Author photo by Craig at www.craigphotographystudio.co.uk

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations, reviews, and articles. For any other permission please contact 5 Prince Publishing and Books, LLC.

  First Edition/First Printing January2015Printed U.S.A.

  5 PRINCE PUBLISHING AND BOOKS, LLC.

  Acknowledgements:

  Mum and Dad, thank you for being such creative people and for encouraging me to pursue my dreams. I love you a million bags of sugar.

  Thank you to the amazing people I have met throughout this journey and to the authors I used to admire from afar but now call friends. You know who you are.

  A massive squishy hug to my friends for putting up with me either not being present or for talking ‘book stuff’ constantly!

  To the growing family that is The Happy Hobman Dancers – thank you for being you! You guys RRROCK!

  A shout out to Ginny at Gin’s Book Notes – I’m so glad I found you and it’s been an absolute pleasure to work with you!

  Much appreciation to Viola for the wonderful cover – you have a knack of getting inside my head and coming up with the goods!

  Thanks once again to the wonderful team at 5 Prince Publishing. Authors and staff alike. What a team! A hug across the ocean to my editor Linda – you manage to teach me something new every time I work with you and I appreciate you so much. And to my lovely friend Bernadette for changing my life.

  Dedications:

  To Rich, my hero and my true love. You keep inspiring me after all these years. You have my heart.

  And to my Puddleduck for being beautiful, entertaining and the best hug giver.

  Prologue

  “Oh darling, look at you. You look so grown up.” Stevie’s mum clasped her hands in front of her face, her eyes welling with tears.

  Stevie rolled her eyes. “Um…Mum I hate to break it to you but I’m eighteen which legally means I am grown up.”

  The sales assistant at the suburban London boutique had come to join the let’s stare at Stevie party, and she was beginning to feel a little like a museum exhibit in a prom dress.

  “What do you think, darling? Is this the dress?” Her mum looked so hopeful.

  The dress was ankle length and had a bodice that fit a little like a vice, but she loved the purple iridescent fabric and how it shimmered under the halogen spotlights of the dressing room.

  The Leavers’ Ball was only a week away and as usual Stevie had left purchasing a suitable dress until right at the last minute. Her mother had been urging her to get organised for weeks, and all of her friends had long ago purchased their outfits and accessories. Carrie, Stevie’s closest friend besides Jason, had had hers hanging on the door to her walk-in closet for over a month. Carrie was like that though—uber organised—Stevie wondered why it was she who’d been allocated the role of Head Girl and not Carrie.

  Baffling really.

  Stevie bit her lip. “Um…yes. I think it’s the best one I’ve tried.”

  “I agree…and I’m sure that Jason will think you look stunning too.”

  She rolled her eyes again. “Muuum.”

  Her mum was always fishing for information about her relationship with Jason. She had lost count of the number of times her mother had subjected her to the talk. And she had also lost count of the number of times she had informed her mum that she and Jason were not having sex.

  Not even close.

  However, this was not through want of trying on her part. She loved her boyfriend and had been with him since they were thirteen, for goodness sake. But Jason insisted that he was just not ready to take that next step. He wanted it to be special, not rushed and fumbled like the first times their friends had experienced.

  She had presumed at one time that the real reason was because he didn’t want her, but his words and actions—and his body—showed her otherwise. He was just a gentleman. He had told her that they were a permanent fixture in each other’s lives, and so there was no rush to lose their virginity. In the end, she surmised that she was just a ball of raging hormones and that she could wait too, if she must. Although she had a sneaky suspicion that after the Leavers’ Ball things might take a step in the right direction. After all, her mum would be out with her best friend Jilly, and Jason would be escorting her home. For this reason, the dress had to be perfect.

  “I’m just saying, sweetie. You look so beautiful.” A wistful look washed over her mum’s features. “You have a look of your dad now that you’re older.”

  Dana Watts was a wonderful mother. She did the job of two parents, and she did it to perfection. Stevie’s dad, a failed musician and the exciting older man, had been a roadie and sound engineer working for London based bands after he left college. His passion for music, especially Fleetwood Mac, had given Stevie her name. He had apparently doted on Dana, and although at twenty-four years old was initially shocked at discovering his nineteen-year-old girlfriend was pregnant, he was excited about being a father.

  Soon after her birth, Stevie’s father had been offered the chance of a lifetime to leave London and tour the world with some famous rock star and had grabbed it with both hands, leaving Dana to bring up her daughter alone. After keeping in touch for a while and sending birthday cards and letters, there was a long telephone conversation in which he informed Dana there would be another tour with another band immediately after the current one. He claimed to still love Dana but said that the long distance thing wasn’t working, that it was unfair to their daughter to be a dip in and out of her life kind of father and so it would be more beneficial, although not easier, for all concerned if he broke ties.

  He chose never to return, and so Stevie had never met him. Thankfully, she was so young when he left that she hadn’t been cognisant of the heartbreak her mother went through. Her mother’s best friend Jilly had been the one to pick up the pieces and she didn’t have many positive things to say about him. All Stevie did know as she got older was that her mother was very careful with her heart.

  There had been a lovely man in Dana’s life, when Stevie was around eight-years-old, who had been special to Dana, and Stevie had adored him. Her mother had broken up with him when he had announced he would be working in Ireland for a period of three years. Dana wouldn’t even consider the relationship continuing as she presumed the inevitable would happen; he would figure out that the long distance thing would not work for him and she would be left alone yet again. There had been no one else since. As far as Dana was concerned—and Stevie was reminded regularly—Stevie was her life and it would stay that way.

  She knew little of her father, other than what her mother or Jilly had deigned to share. Although from the photos Stevie had seen, it was evident that she took after him in so many ways, physically that is. Her long auburn hair and bright blue eyes were all Jed Marks. And her height for tha
t matter; she was tall just like him. It was moments like this though, standing there in a prom dress and being told by her wonderful mother that she looked like him, when anger bubbled up for what that man had put her mum through. But as always she smiled sweetly and said nothing.

  ****

  Two Days Later

  “So…do I get to see what you bought?” Jason rubbed her shoulders and breathed heavily into her hair just above her ear. Shivers travelled down her spine, melting each vertebra in their wake. They were propped on his bedroom floor, Stevie sitting between his thighs as the DVD played to itself and the popcorn lay untouched.

  His voice was low and tinged with a kind of sadness. Trying to lighten the mood, she slapped his leg playfully. She glared over her shoulder at him. “You certainly do not, Jason Reynolds.” She smiled and leaned up to nibble his chin.

  He pouted and fluttered his eyelashes. “Pretty please.”

  She turned fully in the space between his thighs and kissed him on his protruding bottom lip. She adored him. There was no other way to put it. He was the centre of her universe. And she was his. He was every bit the stunningly gorgeous bad boy with his collar length, scruffy, thick, dark hair and a chiselled jaw. His dark eyes held a kind of mystery that she vowed one day to get beneath. He’d been blessed with the looks of a male model and—from the ridges and striations of his abdomen tangible through his T-shirt—he had the body to match.

  He’d been a little quiet and sullen lately, like the weight of the world rested on his shoulders. She put it down to all the pressure of finals and revising. Add to that the stress of college applications and the prospect of several years of university apart from each other, if things didn’t go according to plan, and you had a recipe for one unhappy Head Boy. Tonight, however, he was hers again. He was the playful Jason she had always loved and had known for what seemed like forever.

  It felt good.

  She reached up and ran her fingers through his luscious, messy hair. “You’ll see it next Friday when you pick me up for the Leavers’ Ball and not a minute before.” His gaze dropped as he picked at a thread on the hem of his duvet cover. “What’s wrong?”

  “Ah, nothing. Just a little sad that it’s all going to be over soon.”

  “Jace, we’re leaving school. We’re not lining up for a firing squad.”

  He smiled and rubbed his nose on hers. “Duh…I know that… It’s just…well, it’s the end of an era, that’s all.”

  “Yes and the beginning of a whole new one. And if I get into Brunel, we’ll still be close to each other and not too far from home.”

  Jason clasped her hand in his. There was an almost pained expression in his eyes. “Have you ever thought about…oh, I don’t know…not going to uni?”

  She frowned at his question. “No…never. It’s what I’ve always planned. It’s what you’ve always planned too. You’ve studied so hard. Don’t worry. I just know you’ll get the grades the Oxford board is looking for.”

  He huffed the air from his lungs. “Yeah…I know…I just…I don’t know…I wonder what it would’ve been like if I’d been an average Joe. You know…average intelligence. There would’ve been a lot less pressure on me.”

  She kissed his nose. “You’ve just got pre-results blues, that’s all. One day, you’ll be a doctor without a doubt.” She leaned her forehead on his. “Your mum and dad must be so proud of you. I know I am. And you’re the best role model for Dillon.”

  Jason nodded but his eyes were filled with sadness. “Thanks. I just get a bit tired of having to be the best at everything. There’s no room for error. Failure is not an option.” He spoke as if quoting someone. “It wears me down, Stevie.” His jaw clenched.

  “Well, you shouldn’t be so bloody talented then, eh?” she teased.

  He dropped his gaze again. “That’s just it though…the more I do well, the more people expect from me. It’s getting ridiculous.”

  Worried about his current train of thought, she crawled into his lap and looked into his eyes. “What’s brought all this on?” She stroked his cheek lovingly.

  He gazed up at her, tenderly tucking her hair behind her ears. “Oh nothing…just ignore me. You’re probably right about the pre-result nerves.” He pulled her down and kissed her until she melted into him once again and forgot what they had been discussing. And then he whispered her favourite words, his mantra. “Hmm, Stevie…my soul mate.”

  She smoothed her hands down his chest to his tight stomach and his muscles flinched beneath her touch. “I could always…help you take your mind off things…if you’d let me try.”

  He lifted her and placed her beside him. His eyes were pleading a message, but she couldn’t quite read it. “Stevie…not here…not yet. It’s not that I don’t want you…and I do love you…but…can we wait? Please?”

  Once again, he had rebuffed her advances and she felt foolish. But she smiled and nodded, tucking herself into his side as she turned her attention back to the DVD on the screen.

  ****

  Leavers’ Ball Night

  Stevie smoothed the dress down over her curves and added a little more gloss to her lips. It was ten minutes past the time Jason was supposed to pick her up. He was never late. She paced the hallway, getting more and more annoyed as the minutes ticked by.

  “Have you tried his mobile?” Dana asked as Stevie became increasingly upset.

  She narrowed her eyes and put her hands on her hips. “Oooh, do you know I never thought of that!” she snapped, immediately regretting her harsh tone. She sighed heavily. “Sorry, Mum…there was no need for that… It’s just so not like him. I don’t get it.”

  Thankfully, Dana didn’t get upset easily. “Well, what did his mum say?”

  “Nothing. She wasn’t in. No one was in. Dillon has no idea either. Jason wasn’t home when he got back from school.” She chewed on a painted nail. Her other hand clung to the silver coloured heart shaped pendant around her neck that Jason had made for her in his metal work class. He had engraved her favourite words on the reverse. My soul mate.

  Dana stopped her daughter in her tracks and pulled her hand away from her mouth. “Keep doing that and we’ll have to redo your nails, sweetie. He’ll be here. Please try to stop worrying.”

  An hour later—and after several phone calls aiming to discover the whereabouts of her boyfriend—the mystery was no nearer to being solved. Dana was doing her best to comfort her daughter, who was distraught with worry.

  The house phone rang and Stevie leapt to grab it. “Jason?” she gasped into the phone, desperately hoping she was right.

  “Stevie? No love… It’s Shirley.” Jason’s mother sounded like she was crying. Stevie lowered herself to the sofa, dreading what she was about to hear.

  “Shirley, what’s going on? Where’s Jason? I’m really worried.” Her words came out in a rush.

  “Sweetheart…he’s…he’s gone…Jason’s gone.”

  Her heart plummeted like a stone in a deep pond and her skin became cold and clammy as dread washed over her. “What? What do you mean he’s gone? Gone where?” Suddenly Shirley’s words hit her and something resembling a sob and a scream left her body. “No!”

  Dana flung an arm around her daughter as the phone slipped out of her hands.

  With a rapid movement Dana caught the falling handset and fumbling a little with her daughter encircled in one arm, she manoeuvred the phone to her ear. “Shirley? Oh my God, Shirley, what’s happened?”

  Stevie was light headed and faint. The room spun and echoed. She felt as though she was disappearing, receding down a long tunnel as the room retreated from view. Her mum shouted her name before everything went black.

  ****

  The light hurt Stevie’s eyes as she slowly fluttered her eyelids open to find Dana hovering over her. “She’s coming round, Shirley.”

  “Oh, Stevie, sweetheart, you gave us a fright,” Shirley said as she stroked her hand. Stevie pulled herself upright and couldn’t quite understand why
Jason’s mother was

  a) in her living room and

  b) not hysterical at the news that her son was somehow…dead.

  Thinking the thought again made her lip quiver, her heart ache, and her stomach roll.

  “I’m going to throw up,” she informed the two wide-eyed women before she retched. Luckily, her stomach was empty thanks to her lack of appetite that evening and the dry heaves turned to sobs once again.

  “Stevie…don’t cry, darling. Listen to what Shirley has to say, okay?” She nodded, looking from one woman to the other and feeling very confused.

  Shirley inhaled and squeezed her hand. “You’ve misunderstood me, darling. I’m pretty sure Jason is fine. I’m so sorry for scaring you. It wasn’t my intention. I was just shocked. I mean, I’m sure he’s alive…he…he just…left.”

  Stevie took a moment for the words to sink in. Something wasn’t quite right. This wasn’t right. “What do you mean he left? He can’t have just left. Where would he go? Why would he go?”

  Shirley squeezed her hand again. “We have no idea. He just cleared his closet out and took his savings. But he left his mobile phone behind. Wherever he’s gone, he doesn’t want to be contacted.”

  Stevie shook her head in disbelief. “There must be some mistake. He wouldn’t do that… It was the Leavers’ Ball… He was supposed to take me… He loves me…and there’s Oxford… He loves me… I don’t…”

  Shirley put an arm around her shoulder. “I think perhaps he just needed to get away for a while. He’s been under lots of pressure with the exams and his application to Oxford. I’m sure he’ll come home when he’s had a few days away. Let’s try not to worry, eh?”

  Flooded with relief Stevie nodded and inhaled a deep, shaking breath through pursed lips. “Yes…yes you’re probably right. He’ll be back… He has been stressed, I do know that…and a little quiet…but I know him and he wouldn’t just leave like that…not for good… He loves me. I know he really loves me…”

  The two women hugged her and held her hand as her eyes darted back and forth between them. “He loves me. I know he does. He’ll come back.”