Finding Justus

by Bretz, Amanda

“Last year tourism was kinda slow, so they bounced me back and forth between this ship and the smaller one. It was a really fast-paced summer. I can’t complain too much, the pay is decent and it’s helping me pursue my dreams.”

  “Oh, can you tell me more? If you don’t mind my asking, that is.”

  “Not at all. It’s what we were discussing the first time we went out, at the other club. You probably couldn’t hear me in there. Anyway, I hope to open the restaurant, dance studio and nightclub all at once. The dance studio and the club will have Latin music and dancing of course. I want to put it near Ocean Drive, on South Beach.”

  He continued to talk animatedly about South Beach and Miami in general. Miguel painted a stunning word picture and Justus wished she and Krystal had time between the ship’s docking in Miami and their flight to explore South Beach when they returned to the Port of Miami, but unfortunately they wouldn’t be able to.

  They had gotten to know a lot about each other over conversation and dancing. After several dance lessons with Miguel, Justus was more confident in her movements than she was the first night they danced together. When she and Miguel did the salsa together she felt in sync with him as they stepped together from left to right.

  “You’re doing so great, Justus,” Miguel said close to her ear.

  As it had before, her name sounded differently on his lips than it had ever sounded on anyone else’s. It sounded exotic, sexy, intoxicating, or maybe it was just that she had had too much to drink.

  As Justus looked around at the other dancers she noticed something different from the previous club. There were so many others staring at the two of them. Were they staring because she and Miguel were the only couple doing salsa steps to a soft jazz number? Or was it because they looked so good dancing together and completed each other so perfectly that they were in awe?

  She hoped it was the latter. Miguel seemed to sense the audience they had acquired and tightened his grip on her hips. He started quickening his steps and Justus followed. Then he put distance between them and started spinning her in fast circles. Her red halter dress was twirling about her legs beautifully.

  When the song was over Justus clung breathless and smiling to Miguel. The other couples on the dance floor shot them admiring looks and a few clapped. To which they both laughed. After another drink and some time to cool off, Miguel suggested they take a stroll. Justus quickly agreed.

  She feared whatever kind of magic had just happened on the dance floor was over. The last drink had made her tipsy, and she knew there was no way she could be coordinated enough to salsa, and spins were out of the question. As they walked hand in hand out onto the deck, Justus took several deep, salty breaths. She put her head on Miguel’s shoulder.

  “I think you’re a little tipsy,” he murmured in her hair, as they walked to the railing on the side of the ship.

  “It’s so beautiful out here.” She turned to face him. “I wish you could see the view from the patio in my cabin.”

  Miguel raised his eyebrows at her and chuckled. Justus realized the alcohol was speaking for her.

  “I mean you could, but Krystal’s there. I mean, not that it matters or anything, I just think it’s really beautiful from that perspective.” She decided she needed to stop rambling. It seemed to do more harm than good. Miguel only nodded and kept chuckling to himself as she spoke.

  “I think I know what you’re saying, and what you’re not saying, also,” he said with a wink.

  Justus closed her eyes and turned her face toward the sea. She loved Miguel’s voice. It wasn’t incredibly deep, and yet it wasn’t high either. It was about mid-range with just a hint of gravel in it. Along with his slight accent, Justus thought listening to him speak was one of the sexiest things in the world.

  She imagined what it would sound like whispering frantic, hurried, chanted words, or her name, while Miguel was on top of her, making love to her. Suddenly her eyes sprang open.

  Making love? Now she knew she was drunk.

  “Is something wrong?”

  “No, why?”

  “Because you looked so relaxed and then your eyes popped open.”

  “It’s the liquor, but I think the air is doing some good.”

  Miguel touched her bare shoulder and began to massage it. “I think we really put on a good show in there. I can’t believe you spun me around like that. I’m surprised I didn’t break my ankle in these,” she said as she pointed down to her three-inch heeled sandals.

  “I did it because you’re easy to dance with. By the way, I love how this,” he gestured to her dress as his eyes toured down her body, “really got into our dance, too. You look beautiful tonight.”

  She smiled at him and was glad she had chosen to wear the outfit. She had worn her hair in a messy braid and left a few wisps here and there. Her red halter dress fit her to a tee. She had accessorized it with chunky silver jewelry. On her feet she wore black and red leather sandals that laced up to mid-calve and tied in back, with little red roses dangling from the laces. In short, Justus looked the part of Miguel’s salsa partner.

  When she’d purchased the dress and shoes back home, she’d thought they would be cute for a cruise. She never dreamed she’d be salsa dancing in them. Actually, she had never dreamed she would be doing a lot of things she had done on the cruise.

  Miguel reached for her and kissed her passionately while his right hand still massaged her left shoulder. As the kiss deepened, she felt herself getting more and more aroused, as she rubbed all over Miguel’s upper body. She moved her hands from his face, to his hair, to the back of his neck, to his shoulders. Justus couldn’t get enough of him. She wanted more, a lot more. Justus was about to let him know it when they heard laughter and voices coming towards them.

  They pulled apart reluctantly, and she began straightening Miguel’s shirt, though she didn’t know why either of them stopped. It wasn’t like a little kiss was offensive to people. Granted, their kiss was anything but little, and Miguel couldn’t get fired for being with her. Since he was part of the entertainment on the ship, he was allowed to fraternize with the guests.

  “Justus,” a cheery voice called. Justus turned to her left to see Michelle with her brother in tow. “You look so fabulous, I love the shoes!”

  “Thanks, I kinda bought them on a whim.”

  “Hey, I’ve gotta run now, but tomorrow is the island day and I understand there’s going to be a barbeque, and all sorts of great stuff. You, me and Krystal, let’s hang out. Or at least sunbathe together, okay?”

  “All right, sounds good, I’ll let Krystal know. See you tomorrow,” she called to Michelle’s back. She turned to Miguel who was looking at her with surprise.

  “You know someone on the ship?”

  “Well, she and Krystal sort of hit it off. She’s from Chicago, and as it turns out, she’s here for a family reunion. From what I understand she can only take so much family time, so she’s really latched on to us.”

  Miguel nodded. After their intrusion, they had just decided to call it a night. It was after one in the morning when Miguel walked her to her door. She was tired and she knew she would be getting up around eight, since the ship would be in port by nine.

  At the door Miguel said, “I feel bad for asking you this now that you’ve ran into your friend, but I was hoping to spend some time with you on the island. There’s this really beautiful spot I would like to show you.”

  “Well, we’ll be there all day and if Michelle hangs out with us, then I won’t feel like I’m leaving Krystal. I know she wouldn’t care either way. I just don’t want to feel like I am ditching her.”

  “Well, she can come, too. I didn’t mean to make you feel like you should choose between us. I wasn’t even thinking about it.”

  “No, I would like a private tour. Things will work out. Just catch up with me tomorrow, okay?” He agreed and kissed her goodnight.

  Now as Justus sat and watched the sunrise, she thought about how alive and in her element
she had felt last night. Even though she was twenty-six years old, last night was the first time she had felt she fit in, like she truly belonged somewhere. That somewhere was in Miguel’s arms dancing, talking, laughing, and kissing.

  He made her feel so different, yet so very much like him. It scared her because she knew in only a few days she would be on a plane back to St. Louis and she would never see Miguel again. That saddened her in so many ways, not just because she would miss spending time with him, but also because she couldn’t bear the thought of going back home, entering the dating scene and having to settle for someone who made her feel lukewarm and uncomfortable.

  Miguel made her feel red hot, sexy and comfortable in her own skin, and she was sad to have to lose that, since she had finally found it after so many disgruntling experiences with men. Justus knew the best thing for her to do right now was to enjoy the moment and not think about the future. She was going to see Miguel today and it would no doubt be another incredible date. She shivered with a little thrill of going and exploring an island with Miguel.

  She couldn’t believe a man had actually made her feel this way. It was incredible that a man had made her wake before dawn just to think about him. She certainly had never done that before. But then again, she’d never met a man who possessed enough sensuality to give her that urge.

  Justus studied the way the sun lit up the horizon. It was breathtaking. She didn’t know what she liked better, the Caribbean sunrises or sunsets. After the sun had fully risen and had been up for a while, she went back inside the cabin. Krystal would be getting up anytime now.

  Justus showered and got dressed and when she came out of the bathroom, Krystal was awake.

  “Hey Jus, are you ready for our island day?” she asked as she pulled her clothes out of the chest of drawers.

  “Sure am. It should be fun, huh? We can act like we’re castaways or something.”

  “You shouldn’t joke about that. That’s like making references to the Titanic while we are on the cruise. Speaking of being on the cruise…I’m getting less and less excited about each day because that’s one day closer to going home.”

  “Tell me about it,” Justus said as she combed her wet hair, “it’s like t-minus three days and counting now. I don’t think I’m ready to go,” she added softly.

  ***

  “I love the feel of the warm sand between my toes,” Krystal said as she and Justus walked along the beach.

  “Hey, let’s lay here, it’s kind of away from people, but still out in the open enough for Michelle to be able to spot us.”

  “I wish I had a little radio or something. It’s quiet here, compared to the pool deck,” Krystal said as they rolled their towels out in the sand.

  “I’ll hum,” Justus joked, “What’s your favorite song?”

  “Uh, ‘My Funny Valentine.’”

  Justus started humming and snapping her fingers.

  “I didn’t really think you’d know it, that’s one of my aunt’s favorite songs. Okay, okay, you can stop now, I was kidding. Now, I’ll have that melody stuck in my head all day.”

  “Well, you won’t be alone, because I will, too. Do you smell that?” Justus asked as she sniffed the air.

  “You look like a dog,” Krystal said as she laughed. She took a deep breath in and said, “Yum, I love the smell of grilling meat.”

  “I hope they aren’t planning on roasting a pig, since it’s a luau. I don’t want it to be that authentic. That’s just gross. There’s something about looking into my dinner’s eyes that freaks me out.” Krystal laughed at Justus and turned her head when she saw someone standing in front of them.

  “Mind if I lie next to you?”

  They both squinted into the sun to see Michelle. “Hey! No, go right ahead. How long have you been out here?”

  “I came out early with Anthony to take a swim, and then went back to my room to grab the rest of my things. How about you?” Michelle asked as she began laying her towel out beside Krystal’s.

  “We’ve only been out here about thirty minutes,” Justus informed her.

  “And I’m already hot and sweaty, I might add,” Krystal said.

  “The wind will probably pick up soon. Oh, by the way,” she said casually as she rubbed lotion on herself, “who was that hot guy I saw you with last night, Justus?”

  “His name is…Miguel,” Krystal said dramatically.

  “Will you stop it? I’m not on a soap opera here. He’s just a guy I’ve been talking to here on the cruise,” she said with nonchalance that she felt neither Krystal nor Michelle was buying. “He’s twenty-eight, and he’s a dance instructor on the ship during the summers. He lives in Miami as an instructor and a waiter the rest of the year.”

  “He’s gorgeous. But then again, I’ve always been drawn to Latin men,” Michelle said, and bobbed her eyebrows up and down, which caused all three women to burst out in laughter.

  ***

  “Let’s go get some of that delicious smelling barbeque,” Michelle said an hour later.

  A short while later they were chowing down on burgers, chicken, and hot dogs.

  “Look at that! I’m doing that next. I don’t care that I just ate, either,” Krystal declared, as she watched several people on wave runners.

  “Now you’re holding onto that superstition about not entering the water after eating? After you’ve told me it was bogus about twenty times now.”

  Krystal shrugged as though she wasn’t listening to Justus. After she wolfed down her food she ran over to see about getting a wave runner. It was going to be a thirty minute wait for two and a sixty minute wait for the three of them. Justus remembered Miguel and his promise to catch up with her.

  “Since I’m really full, and not nearly as excited about going as you both are, you can take the first two available, and I’ll skip it for now, and sit up on the beach and observe.”

  “Are you sure Justus? You could ride on the back of one of ours.”

  “No thanks. I’ll wait.”

  Krystal and Michelle signed up for two. As they were getting instructed on safety and operation of the wave runners, Krystal leaned over to whisper into her ear. Justus figured she was going to tell her that she had her eye on the gorgeous instructor. She was wrong.

  “I know only one thing that would make a woman not want a huge, vibrating piece of machinery between her legs; a hot guy!” Justus nearly burst out laughing at her, but slapped Krystal on her shoulder instead.

  “Seriously, I’m not expecting you to be sitting up here when we get back. And it’s okay with me. I’ve got Michelle, so feel free to go have some fun.”

  Justus shrugged her shoulders as if to say ‘we’ll see.’

  ***

  She was so beautiful and perfect, from the top of her dark head to the tips of her red toenails. She was beautiful and perfect, and he wanted her, but what man wouldn’t?

  Miguel couldn’t help but wonder as he watched Justus and her friends eat and laugh. He wanted her, but at the same time was unsure what it would lead to emotionally.

  He was feeling things for her he hadn’t felt in a long time. Hell, maybe he’d never felt this way before. He wasn’t sure. He didn’t fully understand what it was he felt either. If Justus lived near Miami, then he would say he was falling in love with her.

  But she didn’t.

  She lived over a thousand miles away, and there was no way anything between them could work with that kind of distance. He was also unsure of what her feelings were. He knew she was attracted to him, and she seemed to like being around him. He wasn’t sure if her attraction to him had been instantaneous, as he’d been to Justus when he saw her sitting around the pool the first day of the cruise.

  At first, it had been her beauty that had drawn him to her, but now that he had spent time with her, Miguel found there was so much more to be attracted to. He was attracted to virtually everything about Justus. She was smart, ambitious, and talented. Even though he’d never seen her work, he sensed
it from the passionate way she spoke of her designs during their conversations.

  As he watched the three women get up from their seated positions, Miguel involuntarily licked his lips as he watched Justus sashay across the beach. It looked like she and her friends were signing up for a wave runner and were getting the standard safety instructions. Suddenly Justus smiled and hit Krystal playfully. He felt as though his heart had stopped for a split-second. There was no way Justus was a single woman. She probably had a boyfriend back home and was just having fun on the cruise.

  Miguel had been telling himself she couldn’t be single since the first time he had laid eyes on her, but he knew Justus really wasn’t the type of woman who would cheat on her man. She had too much integrity for that. Justus might be single, but Miguel got the sense she wasn’t fully available. It seemed to him she’d been hurt badly. Sometimes she got this guarded look in her eyes, and her demeanor seemed to change. Maybe she was using him to get back at someone, hateful thought as it was.

  Miguel’s spirits soared as he watched Krystal and the other woman going out alone on their wave runners and leaving Justus to herself. He would go to her, but he wanted to stare at her for just a while longer. He wanted to admire her for as long as he could without her knowing it.

  ***

  “Mind if I put some lotion on you?” Miguel asked. Justus startled at the sound of his voice. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he said into her ear. Instead of waiting for her to respond to him, he knelt beside her, as started rubbing lotion into his hands. When he touched her back, it was all she could do not to moan with satisfaction. It was the most intimate contact he’d had with her body thus far. She inhaled the fragrant coconut scent of the lotion as his hands glided across her flesh. Why did every move this man made have to feel so damned erotic? She wondered if and when she would find the answer to that question.

  “Thanks. I was hoping the sun tan lotion genie would appear soon. It looks like you’ve granted my wish”

  His hands rubbed lower, until they were at the top of her bikini bottom. Miguel stroked her back a few moments longer. When he was finished she rolled over and took a moment to appreciate the way the sun made his green eyes even more arresting and his skin appear golden.