Conscious Decisions of the Heart

by John Wiltshire

  § § §

  With those words Nikolas nodded, relieved as he watched Ben swim away. He’d found the diving harder than he’d expected and was quite glad to stay with the equipment. He dropped his tanks as well and dived down to see if he could open the case, but, not surprisingly, it was locked. When he surfaced, there was a loud noise near, and he turned his head, expecting to see Ben with the boat, but the sound was coming from overhead.

  A small helicopter appeared, skimming over the line of surf. It was very close to the surface of the ocean, and a man was hanging out of one side with some kind of instrument in his hand. Nikolas dived back under the water and fixed his mouthpiece in place, holding onto the case to stay submerged. He could see the surface of the lagoon rippling as the helicopter came overhead. Whatever the instrument was, Nikolas had no doubt it’d found the case, for the bird stayed directly overhead for some time before moving slowly away. Fortunately for him, although the occupants of the chopper could clearly see something with their instrument, they couldn’t by sight, for the downdraft from the blades so disturbed the water it became quite opaque. When it was still once more, he surfaced cautiously. It was a few more minutes before Ben appeared with the boat. Silently and quickly, they loaded the diving equipment in, then Ben dived over and they retrieved the case together. As they were struggling to get it in the boat, Ben murmured, “I saw the damn helicopter, Nik. They were looking for this.”

  “It must have a transmitter on it. We shouldn’t take it back to the hut.”

  “Bloody hell! No! We’re taking it to the hotel and handing it in! Fuck knows what it is or who wants it.”

  “Don’t swear at me. We can’t hand it in until we know what it is. We’ll open it first.”

  They scrambled into the boat, and Nikolas headed for the steeply rising headland to one side of the lagoon. As they approached the jungle-clad cliffs they could see deep caves in the limestone. They motored into one, and the air immediately cooled around them. After a few minutes, they were losing the light from the wide mouth entrance, so Nikolas slowed the boat and pulled over on the rocky edge, tying up. They looked at each other for a moment. Ben glanced around the walls and roof towering above them slightly anxiously, perhaps remembering his comment about movie cave systems and their horrific occupants. Suddenly, Nikolas lunged theatrically at him with a mock howl. Ben jerked back with a screech; the boat tipped, and they tumbled into the water. Nikolas was still laughing as they hauled the case back to the surface and shoved it up onto the rocks.

  It was fastened by a combination lock, but it didn’t stand up to their diving knives for very long. They were both shivering now, as the cave was surprisingly cold, and the warm morning sun was drawing them both back. Nikolas laid his hand on the lid. “Counterfeiting plates?”

  Ben considered. “Heroin.”

  “Winner takes all?”

  “Yeah. Not if it’s heroin, you addict. Just open it. It’s bloody freezing in here.” Nikolas continued to be reluctant. Finally, he opened the lid. There was a transmitter lying on top of an inner case. Ben took it out and smashed it. They grinned at each other. Nikolas pulled out his knife and slit the covering. Something glinted underneath. He pursed his lips and pulled out a bar. Ben laughed, obviously pleased. “Chocolate?” Nikolas handed it to him. It was cold and hard and solid and heavy. Ben looked up. Nikolas pulled out another, then another. He did a quick count.

  “Fifty.”

  “Okay…This looks like gold, but it’s not, Nik, yeah? I mean…seriously, gold bars dropping from the sky?”

  Nikolas picked up his knife again and scraped at one of the bars. It stayed the same colour. He shrugged. “I don’t know. It seems unlikely, even to me, and I was the one who wanted to find treasure. Even I didn’t think we’d find unmarked bars of gold.”

  “What’re they worth?”

  Nikolas considered. “Kilogram bars? About thirty thousand each, so not a huge amount.”

  “Not a huge amount! That’s…” Nikolas waited with an amused smile as Ben tried to do the calculation. “A lot. More than a million, yeah?”

  “Yes. One and a half, but gold’s very volatile at the moment. It could be more, it could be less.”

  “Oh, my God.” Ben took out another bar and then another. He glanced at Nikolas. “They’ll be wanting this back, whoever they are.”

  “Yes. Pity they’ll not get it, isn’t it?”

  “Nik…”

  “Come, unload it all and check the case for more transmitters. If this were my gold—huh, it is now—I wouldn’t rely on one.” He was right. When they unloaded the case, they found one more active transmitter in the bottom. They smashed this one as well. Rather than take the gold back with them, they reloaded the case, and Ben climbed the wall and stashed it high up on a shelf in a small hollow. Ben seemed very reluctant to leave it, but Nikolas was unconcerned. For him, it wasn’t the value of the gold, which was after all fairly small in consideration to his wealth, but what it represented, sunken treasure, adventure. He hadn’t had this much fun since—Well, he didn’t usually allow himself to think about the things in the past that had given him pleasure. One by one, he’d had to give them up, most of them because Ben had nagged him to. But then Ben provided him more fun than anything else, so he had to admit it was a good trade.

  § § §

  Ben could see the contented expression on Nikolas’s face all the way back in the boat. Nikolas was usually so laconic and hid so many of his emotions that to see him happy made Ben’s heart melt on all his good intentions about the gold. He didn’t think it was possible for him to love Nikolas Mikkelsen any more, but in that moment, he sunk a little deeper and became a little more enslaved to the golden god of his existence. He leant over and ruffled Nikolas’s wet hair. Nikolas gave a rueful smile. “I won’t keep it, Ben. I don’t need it. But they’ll not get it either. You didn’t see that man’s face, or hear his scream. He knew all the way down what was happening to him.” He grinned. “We’ll donate it. Be patrons of something worthy.”

  “You can’t buy your way into heaven, Nikolas.”

  “No, but we can bribe the demons in hell for some respite occasionally. Now, stop thinking so much, you’re giving me another headache.”

  He didn’t look as if he was suffering much from anything. He lay back in the boat as Ben drove, the wind ruffling his blond hair, the sun warming his skin, without a care in the world. In this bright, tropical light, his eyes were never the dark-chocolate brown they always were in England, but amber with flecks of gold. They were the eyes of a sleek predator pleased with how his prey behaved. Ben never tempted fate if he could help it, but he sent a small prayer of thanks up to a benevolent universe that had given him this moment with this man.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

  Ben wasn’t quite so pleased with Nikolas later that day when Nikolas left him to take all the diving equipment back on his own and sauntered off to check the gold prices on his laptop. Vital research, he called it.

  He was then even less pleased with Nikolas when he rounded the corner to the shop with as much of the equipment as he could carry in one load and saw three men enter the place who definitely weren’t there to hire diving equipment. Ben had worn a concealed weapon enough times in his life to recognise other men wearing them under their suits. Two of the armed men remained outside, scanning the area, and one went in. Ben backed off to consider his options. He stashed all the equipment out of sight and returned to watch developments. As soon as the men left, he went into the shop and spoke with the boy behind the counter. The lad looked a little nervous, and Ben discovered although he’d been reluctant to hand over the list of those who’d hired diving equipment over the last forty-eight hours, he’d been persuaded to. Ben convinced him to do the same, but with money and not menaces. Fortunately for him and Nik, fifteen people had taken out equipment in that time. It would take a while for the men to work through the list, and by then…That was when Ben hit something of a low with Nikolas.
He realised the holiday fun was over.

  He went to find the culprit.

  Nikolas glanced over the list as he listened to Ben’s tale. He pouted. He clearly didn’t want to leave the hotel either. Ben shook his head at Nik’s expression. “No, we’re not killing them.”

  Nikolas looked pained. “As if I’d suggest something like that.”

  “It’s not going to take them long to work through this list and come asking questions of us.”

  “So? We’re two innocent holiday makers, along with everyone else on this list.”

  “Stop being so bloody stupid, will you? We’re the only ones who swim regularly. Everyone knows that. Some of these names are families, here, and here. That’s the girl who sits near us in the evenings. She’s on her own, she couldn’t have lifted it. They’ll know that! So, duh, Nikolas, if I was searching for the people who stole my gold, I might just look at us!”

  “So…you notice young women now, do you, Benjamin? I think we need to have a serious—Are you walking away from me?”

  Ben stomped back to the boat, and because he was feeling so pissed off, he climbed in and took it. Bugger Nikolas. Let him walk on bloody water if he was so bloody perfect. He did feel a bit guilty though, and tried to remember if Nik was wearing a swimsuit under his shorts. Probably. Fuck him.

  He motored back to the hut, thinking about packing, tied up and jumped onto the deck. He went from the brilliant sunshine to the gloom, and it was only then, as his eyes adjusted, he saw a man standing by their dresser, flicking through their passports. He turned and found a gun pointed at his chest by a second man who’d been waiting around the far side of the deck. “Mr Rider?”

  Ben turned to the man inside the hut. “What’s this? Who’re you?”

  The man held out a wallet with a badge inside. “Commander De Jesus. Coast Guard.”

  “Coast Guard. Seriously?”

  “You find that funny, Mr Rider?” Ben didn’t attempt to explain his relief at discovering they weren’t Danish detectives.

  “No, I’m sorry. So, what can I help you with?” He was assessing the man standing behind him. He didn’t know anything about the Philippines Coast Guard, but he was surprised they were issued with M14 rifles.

  “Can you tell me, Mr Rider, what you were doing this morning between the hours of nine a.m. and eleven a.m. local time?”

  “Yes, I went diving with a friend.”

  “Where?”

  “Just exploring the lagoon.”

  “Did you go into the water beyond the fall?”

  “No, we stayed in the lagoon, why?”

  “Did you find anything and remove anything from the sea floor?”

  “No.”

  “So…” The commander delved into his pocket and pulled out some photographs. “This isn’t you?” Ben took the photos. They were taken with a telephoto lens from the headland, and they clearly showed him and Nikolas motoring across the lagoon with the case, very shiny and visible, in the boat.

  “Mr Rider, you’re under—”

  “What the fuck…!” Ben swung around as he heard Nikolas’s expletive—as did the man with the rifle. Nikolas rose sleek and furious from the water. He’d stripped to his swimsuit and swum to the hut. Ben returned the furious look Nikolas gave him with an “I told you so” glare and added audibly, so there was no mistake, “What the fuck does it look like?” He handed him the photos.

  Nikolas shrugged. “May I see some identification?” He took his time checking the badge, not giving any indication whether he believed it or not. “We found a case. We couldn’t open it. We put it somewhere for safety, and have this morning informed the authorities what we found. Where’s the problem here?”

  “You’re both under arrest for smuggling.” De Jesus approached Ben with a set of handcuffs.

  Nikolas frowned. “No, that’s not going to happen.” He made to approach the commander, but suddenly Ben snapped.

  “No!” He launched a decisive and unexpected attack, seizing Nikolas by the waist and propelling him back to the bed. They struggled for a moment, Nikolas completely blindsided and undone by Ben’s actions. Ben felt something slam into his shoulder. He grunted and sagged onto Nikolas, and before they knew it, they were handcuffed together, and the man who’d hit Ben was bringing his rifle butt up for another blow. The commander put his hand on his subordinate’s arm and shook his head. “Call the boat.” Then he put a hand to a shoulder holster to indicate he was more than willing to draw and use his own gun if necessary.

  Nikolas yanked his handcuffed arm as far away from Ben as possible, which was a rather redundant move as it only brought Ben’s arm along with it, and spat in Danish, “You stupid fucking moron.”

  Ben stared back at him and replied in the same language, “Seriously? You were going to risk another injury? Another blow to the head over some gold you don’t even need or want? And prison? In the Philippines? Have you seen Midnight Express? You spend more on suits in a year than that gold is worth.”

  “Stop exaggerating.” Nik hung his head, pouting. “And that was Turkey.”

  “You’re the fucking idiot, Nikolas. You know what all this is, don’t you?”

  “I have the very distinct idea you’re going to tell me.”

  “It’s because you’re bored. You stir things up wherever you go just for the fun of it. We’re like your playthings—the fucking playthings of a bored god.”

  “Stop swearing at me.” Nikolas smiled privately. “But you can call me a god if it pleases you.”

  “Oh, shut up.” They were then both told to be quiet by the commander. They heard a boat, and a large patrol vessel came up alongside the hut. They were marched out. Nikolas was furious because they wouldn’t let him change and neither of them could even put on shirts because of the cuffs. They dropped down into the boat, and the commander invited them to show him where the case was. Nikolas wasn’t playing, so Ben pointed toward the caves in the cliffs.

  Five minutes later, they arrived at the mouth of the cave. Unfortunately for the commander, he then discovered the water in the cave was too shallow for the boat’s draft. A small inflatable was strapped to the hull so he set his men about releasing this from its attachments.

  Ben was watching the proceedings with a gloomy fascination. He was picturing scenes from every prison drama he’d ever watched. Even the gay porn ones. Especially the gay porn ones. Nikolas, the bastard, would probably thrive in prison. He glanced at him. Nikolas had his eyes screwed shut, head tipped back, as if in terrible pain. Ben immediately gave up his plan to volunteer Nikolas for the first internal prison exam. He nudged him. “What’s wrong?”

  § § §

  Nikolas didn’t reply to Ben. He didn’t even hear Ben. As they’d come alongside the mouth of the cave, he’d had a sudden and almost debilitating pain his head. That had passed just as suddenly as it’d come, but he felt as if his head were in a vice with a vacuum forming, all the air slowly being sucked out—all the sound. He was quite deaf. He couldn’t hear anything over the debilitating pressure. He felt intensely sick.

  He knew without a shadow of a doubt he was dying. Finally, the injury to his head, which he’d thought was healed and he was recovering from, had burst forth from the false sense of security it had lulled him into.

  She’d said no stress. No stress!

  He looked up for a last glimpse of sunlight before the pressure in his skull exploded and his heart skipped a beat. A small blond-haired boy was standing on the bank in front of them. He was knobbly-kneed, elbows askew. It was Nikolas, on Aeroe, pale and windblown. The ten-year-old brother he’d adored before the nightmare time had come upon them. The boy cried urgently in Danish, “Climb, Sey, climb. NOW!” Nikolas didn’t hesitate. He tackled Ben around the waist and threw them both in the water. He heard shouts behind them but held them both under, swimming for the tangle of roots and vines overhanging the cliff. A few shots peppered the water around them. Under the canopy of the vegetation, he pulled himself out of th
e water, Ben attached to him by the cuffs. Ben was spluttering, gasping. Nikolas grabbed his arms. “Ben, if you love me, do as I say and climb. Now.”

  § § §

  Ben stared for one brief moment, nodded, and they climbed side by side through the dense, impossible tangle of jungle. One or two shots came very close, chipping off the branches, but they kept climbing, no breath for talking. Ben was slightly ahead now. One shot caught him on his arm, just a very slight graze, but he ignored it and carried on. It was incredibly hot, airless. The heat seared his throat as he tried to suck in some oxygen. Nikolas was pulling him, pushing him, frantic. No more shots. He turned to look back down to the boat, and that’s when he saw it…