Those Mid-Life Blues

by Caroline Campbell

  ‘But you’re so calm about it.’

  ‘Mark, I think when your partners been coming home at three in the morning and he’s telling you he had to work late, except that when he comes home there’s lipstick on the collar of his shirt and a love bite on his neck, which he tells you he got from an insect bite; I think you could safely say I’d be an idiot not to see what was going on.’

  ‘But thirteen weeks and five days.’

  ‘Come on Mark, when I told you he was coming in late you suspected something was up, don’t tell me you didn’t.’

  ‘Yeah, I suspected it but I don’t understand why he asked you to move in with him if he wasn’t ready, I mean the guy’s a player. I mean if you want to do your thing and still have your girl you don’t move her in with you and you most certainly don’t leave any evidence, like lipstick on the collar of your shirt, you get me and as for text messages, always delete them, and cover your tracks. I mean that’s plain dumb, if you don’t cover your tracks. If you’re going to be a player you’ve got to stay one step ahead of the game.’

  ‘Gosh, Mark did you write a book on how to be a player or what? Is that what you men do? Do you men plan to have your cake and eat it, so to speak? That’s just the problem with some of you guys, you just can’t commit.

  ‘I don’t know why he started fooling around and quite frankly I don’t care. I’m not a player, I don’t want a player and I damn well deserve better and do you know what, Mark, the only person he’s fooling is himself.’

  ‘You’re right, the swine. If I see that dirty dog, I’ll beat him to a pulp.’

  ‘OK Mark, there’s no need for drama.’

  ‘Shouldn’t you be crying on my shoulder?’

  ‘No, but I will be if I don’t make it to work on time and Paulette fires me.’

  ‘She’d never fire you, she’d have me to deal with and believe me, baby, she couldn’t handle all of this fine brown, butterscotch, chocolate brownie, toned, silhouette body.’

  ‘Funny, you’re so funny … not! Anyway, I’ve got to go, call me.’

  ‘Yeah, take it easy and don’t sweat over that idiot.’

  ‘Sweat over which idiot?’

  He clicked his fingers and swerved his hips at her. ‘You go, girl, that’s what I like about you, Kelly, you keep it real baby.’

  He watched her from his living room window. There she was running down the road, clutching her funky handbag with her braided hair blowing in the wind and she looked gorgeous as ever. He admired her in every possible way. They had the same sense of humour and the same interests. She liked the gym and they shared the same culinary appetite for West Indian food and cheese on crackers. Her pet hates were feet and anchovies and snails.

  She worked at Lorenzo’s four days a week, was studying part time for a law degree at Westminster University. Her head was screwed on right and her feet firmly placed on the ground. Her driving ambition that steered her in the right direction to complete her next year successfully was on track. She was aiming high, whatever obstacles came her way.

  He sprawled out on his bed and turned the music back up then closed his eyes. What a clown, thought Mark, playing a nice girl like Kelly but he felt a little hypocritical: he’d done exactly the same thing to Veronica.

  Anyway, time to get ready, thought Mark as he looked at his watch. It was 3.30 pm and he had another meeting with Vicky Hendricks and today D Day! She was arranging the final plans for his six month trip to Los Angeles and if the plans went smoothly, in about four weeks or so he’d be jetting off to the USA.

  Mark wondered how Kelly would feel about his going to the States for six months. He presumed she’d be fine about it like she was about mostly everything. More to the point, how would he cope without her?

  He embraced every word in the next song that played from his collection of soulful tunes. ‘In my heart there’s a need to shout, dyin’, screamin’, cryin’, let me out, are all those feelings that I want to touch any love? What a world for the lonely guy, sometimes I feel I’m gonna lose my mind. Can anyone tell me just where to find any love?’ Never had those words leapt out at him than they did right then. ‘And I know, I know, I know she’ll come into my life.’

  His mind slowly drifted to a state of love and blissful happiness but he was quickly brought back down to earth when the song ended and he wondered to himself, was Kelly the one to give him any love.

  Chapter 12- It’s all systems go

  Spotless cleaning services arrived at 6.00 am. Fortunately Tony's father, Henry Manning, called at 7.39 am, feigning some sort of illness much to the delight of Mary. Tony slid into his trousers, pulled on a top, brushed his teeth, blew Mary a kiss and was out of the house by 7.59 am.

  It had been a winning performance by her beloved father in-law but he would have to keep up the act for the next few hours. Henry would make up some excuse for getting back to the house or Mary would call, or something would happen, they hadn’t quite thought of how to get Tony back into the house for 2.30 pm but they would.

  Mary was absolutely exhausted; she had been awake since 3.00 am thinking long and hard about what needed to be done. The gardeners had done a good job at cutting back the shrubs and mowing the vast green land that stretched for what seemed like miles, only now the garden was in tiptop condition.

  The caterers would be arriving at 9.00 am; the flowers at 9.30 am. The cake was to follow at 10.00 am. The orchestra would arrive at 11.00 am and the Holly Oaks Community Gospel Choir would arrive at noon.

  Sadie would be arriving with the photographers at 12.30 pm; the guests any time after 1.00 pm; and the whole thing made Mary dizzy just thinking about it all.

  Samantha from the lookalike entertainment agency called the day before to say that Shirley Bassey would be late. She apologised profusely and claimed Shirley was having a few problems and would be late by fifteen minutes. At 10.30 am the lookalike agency called to cancel Shirley. It had probably been a blessing in disguise. It wasn’t that she couldn’t get the real Shirley Bassey, she could but that would involve an entourage of paparazzi only this time she wanted to keep their prying eyes off Tony. She had her own personal entourage of photographers for the occasion. Actually they were trusted friends of her brother Basil.

  Christine was on hand and escorted the thirty or so band members of the orchestra to the garden where they started setting up their instruments. Raymond was extremely helpful to the rather busty young black waitress in charge of polishing the crystal glasses.

  Holly Oaks lead singer Karen was rehearsing ‘Oh Happy Day.’ Her vocals were powerful and she’d definitely have the guests singing along and the choir, sounding like funky angels, bopping their bodies to the rhythm of the music and hitting all the right notes. The orchestra joined in and before you knew it the caterers, the florists, waitresses and cleaners were jamming. Shirley didn’t know what she was missing, thought Mary, as she swung her hips to the rhythm and the party hadn’t even started.

  It was just after midday and the guests were beginning to arrive. Mary felt a slight twinge in the pit of her stomach. She was excited and nervous at the same time. She quickly ran upstairs to apply the finishing touches to her makeup and slip into her dress. Standing tall in her new red pumps she took a good look at herself in the mirror. The recent facials that Carlos had given her had rejuvenated her tired skin. Old dead skin cells were replaced by a new refreshed and vibrant glow and with subtle touches of makeup and her hair pinned up she looked amazing.

  She wondered if Henry would be on his way back with Tony or if Tony had cottoned on. She took one last look in the mirror, unpinned her long hair and in one swoop her bangs of curls fell to her neck. Her stomach felt queasy as she walked out onto the balcony to take in the view of friends, family, the orchestra and the hundred or so guests. Richard Madeley and Judy Finnigan were talking to the talk show host Jerry Springer.

  Martin and Mark were in direct view and they watched her as she opened her wings with her presence. Guests waved at
her, she smiled gracefully and waved back at them. And then she spotted Martin.

  ‘Hello, beautiful, why don’t you come down here?’

  ‘Martin Truman, you really do know how to make a lady feel like a lady.’ He looked up at her and shouted. ‘You look stunning.’

  ‘Why so do you, you both look great; anyway I’m coming down there to give you two a kiss before my husband arrives which should be any minute now.’ Sadie appeared out of nowhere with her brother’s photographer friends who were already taking snaps of virtually everything in sight.

  ‘Hi Sadie, I’ll be right down.’

  ‘Great, oh and there’s a Des O’Connor lookalike at the door, he says the agency sent him.’

  ‘What!’ shouted Mary, ‘I’ll be right there and for goodness sake, please don’t let him in, the real Des O’Connor’s over there!’

  Mary pointed at Des and Sadie looked around until she spotted Des who was talking to another celebrity guest.

  Mark took a quick look at Sadie’s backside as she disappeared into the house. He thought she had a nice ass but he was more interested in the lobster with seafood dressing and salad. It was 1.35 pm and he hadn’t eaten breakfast yet. Four large tables were spread with a gourmet feast fit for a king and his stomach cried out for a sample of the fine cuisine that was making his mouth water.

  ‘The food looks great and anything that looks good always tastes good, right?’ He was smiling directly at a young waitress who was no more than eighteen. She nervously returned a smile and then he turned to Martin.

  ‘Tony’s a lucky son of a gun,’ mumbled Mark.

  ‘What did you say? I didn’t hear you with all that food stuffed in your mouth and will you stop eating like a pig.’

  ‘I said Tony’s a lucky son of a gun, beautiful home, sexy wife, two great kids, all the money in the world, fame, I mean look at all these famous people.’

  ‘Yeah, you’re right, we’re nobodies.’

  ‘I heard that Martin.’

  ‘Mary, you’re such a beauty.’ Mary looked absolutely gorgeous. For a moment, Tony’s detailed description of Mary in thigh high boots and half butt naked came to mind.

  ‘You look sensational.’ Martin leaned forward and kissed her gently on the cheek. Mark held her hand and kissed her like a gentleman.

  ‘Now, I don’t want you guys feeling as though you’re nobodies, just because of all these people. You’re Tony’s friends and you’re special to me and Tony.’ She gently poked Martin. ‘You’re somebody special,’ and then she gently poked

  Mark, ‘and you’re somebody special too, do you understand?’ ‘I was fooling around Mary,’ said Martin.

  ‘I know that silly, anyway would you guys like a glass of bubbly?’

  Mary waved her hands at a waiter who immediately appeared with a tray of glasses filled with champagne. She handed them each a glass.

  ‘Great party Mary, and I love the orchestra.’

  ‘They’re wonderful, aren’t they Martin?’

  ‘Did you get rid of the Des O’Connor lookalike?’ laughed Mark.

  ‘I certainly did. If you ever have a party, never get a lookalike, especially from the Entertainment Lookalike

  Agency.’

  ‘I’ll remember that Mary.’

  ‘You do that Martin.’

  ‘Do you think Tony suspects anything?’

  Mary shrugged. ‘Actually, I’m not sure Martin. I don’t think so, it’s 2.30 pm now and they’re running late.’

  ‘That was a good scam, his dad feigning an illness,’ said Mark.

  ‘He told me he was having palpitations and hot and cold sweats.’

  ‘And how’s he going to get him back in the house?’

  ‘I’m not sure but Henry sent me a text to say the plan’s working.’

  ‘Great.’

  ‘How’s he been?’ asked Mark.

  ‘He has his moments when everything seems fine and he seems at peace with the world and then there’s days when he’s at war with the world.’

  ‘These things take time Mary, but it’ll work out,’ said Martin in an attempt to reassure her.

  ‘Mary, I think Sadie’s shouting over here, yep looks like she wants your attention, she’s wiggling her ass.’

  ‘Oh, that means the belly dancers have arrived.’

  Martin’s eyes lit up. ‘What belly dancers?’

  ‘Yes, my dear Martin, we have belly dancers. They’re all the way from Siberia. Anyway guys, I'll see you later, duty calls, Sadie’s calling me.’

  As soon as Mary walked away, Mark tapped Martin on his shoulder and whispered, ‘Sadie is definitely a hot babe – did you see the way she was moving that ass? – But I’m not falling for it, not this time buddy. The last time I had someone move their ass on me I ended up being stalked, yep, no more tits and ass for me.’

  ‘Come on, Mark, one bad experience and you’re celibate?’

  ‘No, one bad experience equates to Mark getting to know a woman first … Heh Martin is that Gloria Estefan over there?’ Martin laughed at him. ‘Gloria is sexy, whoever that is needs a makeover, real quick.’

  Half an hour later and more guests were arriving. Mary was beginning to wonder where her father-in-law was. She was irritated by Raymond’s constant flirting with the little waitress he appeared to have taken a shine to. As a caring mother she went up to him and pulled him to one side.

  ‘Raymond, I do wish you’d stop hanging on the tail of that waitress.’

  ‘Mum, her name is Sharon and I think I’m in love.’

  ‘Wonderful honey, but can you be in love with her after the party, only she’s here to work and you’re stopping her from working, oh and have you seen your sister by any chance?’

  ‘Last time I saw her she was talking to some lame actor.’ Mary raised her eyebrow at Raymond.

  ‘OK, she’s talking to that guy who used to be in EastEnders.’

  ‘Thank you, oh and Raymond, can you wipe that lipstick off your collar – in fact go and change your shirt.’

  ‘But Mum—’

  ‘I have spoken.’

  Raymond pointed to Sadie who was waving her hands up and down in excitement and in sign language she mimed, Tony’s here. Mary quickly raced into the garden and called everyone's attention. Christine followed the cue and went to the front door to distract her father’s attention for a few moments while everyone in the garden stood in their positions. Mary’s heart was beating and the atmosphere was equally pulsating.

  Christine opened the front door, wrapped her arms around her father’s neck and squeezed tight. ‘Where have you been, Daddy?’

  ‘Heh, you’re choking me.’

  ‘I’m sorry, Dad.’

  ‘Hello Granddad.’ She gave him a wink to signify the success of their great plan. ‘Are you OK, Granddad?’

  ‘I’m fine now. I’m just glad your father was there for me this morning. My heart was playing up.’ He winked at her again.

  ‘I thought you said it was your stomach Dad,’ questioned Tony.

  ‘Son, I don’t know if it was my heart or stomach, all I know is that I feel better.’

  Christine was still holding unto her father’s arm. She pulled him back from going any further into the house.

  ‘Are you going to let me go in, or are we going to stand out here on the doorstep?’

  He walked into the hallway and stopped by the panel doors that led into the living room with Christine and his father close by.

  ‘Stop right there, Daddy, I want to give you something. Now close your eyes.’

  ‘Christine, you haven’t done anything stupid, have you. No parties I hope?’ Tony closed one eye.

  ‘Granddad, tell Daddy to close his eyes.’

  ‘Son, close your eyes, the child wants to give you something.’

  Christine reached into her trouser pocket and pulled out a little box. ‘Now keep your eyes closed Daddy, no peeking now.’

  She kissed him gently on the cheek and placed the little box in
his hands.

  ‘Happy Birthday Daddy; you can open your eyes now.’

  Tony looked down at the little box and opened it carefully.

  His face lit up like a candle and a tear rolled down his cheek.

  ‘Christine, this is beautiful.’

  ‘It’s from both me and Raymond Dad, and with a bit of luck it should fit on your little finger.’

  He admired the detail given to the inscription inside the ring. It read ‘Love you always, R & C’. He eased it unto his baby finger, kissed her on the nose and swung her around in his arms.

  ‘Daddy, put me down, you’ll strain your back,’ shouted Christine, but Tony just kept on swinging her around.

  ‘Tony, put the child down, you’ll make her ill with all that swinging and I’m having a funny turn again; I think it’s my heart.’ At which point, Tony gently placed her down.

  ‘I thought it was your stomach?’

  ‘It’s my stomach and my heart, I told you that before.’

  Henry winked again, that was her cue to open up the doors that led into the garden.

  ‘Daddy, I think I hear mother calling you.’

  She unlocked the door and opened it wide and standing there was Mary with a hundred or so people behind her.

  ‘Surprise, surprise.’

  Mary hugged Tony then Martin and Mark followed with a good crowd of people who were all trying to get to close to him. Everyone was singing ‘Happy Birthday’ and the photographers were happily taking snapshots of everything in sight. Mary was crying and the whole thing seemed surreal.

  ‘Happy Birthday darling,’ whispered Mary. ‘I love you Tony.’

  The crowd of guests shouted ‘Forty today, forty today!’ Bottles of champagne popped open and the orchestra played ‘Rolling on the River’.

  Mary led him by the hand into the garden but Tony seemed to be in a trance.

  ‘Tony, I know you’re surprised but I wanted to show you how much you mean to me and to the children and everyone here.’ But there was no response from Tony. Mary was worried, ‘Are you OK Tony?’