Midnight Moonrising

by K. S. Haigwood

  “What does that mean?” I said as I scooted off the mattress and slid my feet into a pair of his house slippers.

  As I made my way to the seat beside him, Phoenix folded the paper and laid it on the table. I suddenly felt underdressed in what I was wearing, with him looking as elegant and delicious as he did in a navy button-up and white slacks—not one wrinkle. Had he showered and dressed after he got home or had that been what he’d dressed in before he left last night—the same night we had argued and not settled anything?

  “My question or lupacchiotto?”

  “The second one. You’ve called me that a couple of times, but I’ve never heard it before.” He smiled. I melted. It irritated me immensely that I couldn’t stay mad at him, no matter what he did to upset me.

  “It’s Italian, meaning wolf cub.”

  “Oh,” I said as I picked up the steaming cup of coffee. He must have had someone bring it in just before I woke up. “You don’t look Italian.”

  He grinned again. I glanced back to my cup, took a sip, and then I sighed in approval as the delectable taste hit my taste buds. It was the best coffee I had ever had in my life.

  “I spent some time in Italy—I love it there—but it wasn’t where I was born.”

  “Where were you born?”

  “My mother was the daughter of a poor Viscount of Brittany in the thirteenth century, and she was promised to a wealthy Duke of Spain since her birth.”

  I hadn’t realized I’d placed my elbow on the table and propped my chin in my palm until Phoenix snickered. I was fascinated by the story already and wanted to hear more.

  He reached in front of me and took the lid off a plate of eggs, ham and toast. “There is butter and jam, too, if you like. It’s been a while since I’ve eaten breakfast food, so I hope I didn’t forget anything. You need to eat. The detective will be here in a little over an hour.”

  Blinking down at the food, I nearly teared up. Phoenix had prepared everything himself. I really wanted to apologize for last night, but I wanted to hear about him more at the moment, so the apology could wait.

  “I’ll eat. You talk,” I said.

  He leaned back in the chair and ran a finger over his bottom lip as he studied me. “What would you like me to talk about, Mena?”

  I picked up my fork and shoveled in a bite of eggs before responding. “Mmm… These are really good. What did you season them with?”

  He grinned. “I have my secrets.”

  I didn’t even bother rolling my eyes. I knew very well the man had secrets; I happened to be one of them. Or maybe he was one of mine. Whatever. We both had our share of skeletons stashed in the closet.

  After cutting a piece off the ham, I took a bite, and said, “I want to hear your story. What happened? How did you get to be so regal and magnificent?”

  The corner of his mouth twitched. I knew he loved it when I praised him. It was a total turn-on for him, and I got turned on when he was turned on and… being as we were alone in his chambers and I was in nothing but a long button-up shirt and panties, and also the fact that Alex would be knocking on Phoenix’s door in only a little more than an hour, I really needed to get back on the subject, a different subject, a safe subject.

  “I want to know about you. So, a Duke was your father. What does that make you?”

  He sighed, as if he were sifting through centuries of memories to find the right one to tell me about. “It makes me a bastard.” My fork clattered to the plate as I stared at him. “The Duke wasn’t my father, Mena. She married him, but hated him and everything to do with the arranged marriage her father had forced her into in exchange for a peace treaty, a bag of coins and more land.” He pointed to the plate. “Your food is getting cold.”

  I quickly spread strawberry jam on a triangle of toast and took a bite.

  Satisfied, he continued. “She was headed home late one evening from a visit with her sister when the carriage was attacked by gypsies. They killed her escorts, but she ran into the woods and managed to hide until they had robbed her carriage clean. Assuming they left, after a long while of hearing nothing, she crawled out from the brush and thorns and one of them grabbed her—”

  I gasped. “Oh, no!”

  Phoenix chuckled. “Drink your juice.”

  I took a sip of the coffee instead. “What happened next?”

  “My father happened.” He huffed. “He was watching it all, and he ripped each one of their throats out with his fangs.”

  “Your father was a vampire, too?” I shouted, astonished.

  “Yes, and nobody knew about him until her. He’d kept himself hidden away in the forest, well away from the town folk, and lived off animal blood or the occasional nomad who happened to stumble too close to his cave after dusk. After he murdered the men, he was torn about what to do with her. She looked so scared—and why wouldn’t she be? She’d just witnessed a monster tear apart six grown men with nothing more than his hands and teeth. Even knowing how risky it was to let her go, that was the choice he made. He waited and waited for days, expecting the village in its entirety to come at him with torches and pitchforks. I guess you can imagine his surprise when no one came… nobody except for her. She brought him a tunic, trousers and boots, all handmade by her, she’d told him.”

  “As a thank you for saving her life,” she mused aloud.

  He nodded. “The physical attraction they felt for one another ran deep for them both, and she kept finding excuses to return night after night. Each time he would tell her to stay away from him, that nothing good could become of her visits, but he didn’t mean it, and she knew he didn’t mean it. So, she ignored his demands and continued to come to him. She wanted to know everything about him, and he told her. He thought telling her about him would be enough to make her stay away; he hated to think what someone would do to her if their affair was ever discovered.”

  I sighed. “That’s so romantic. Did they run away together?”

  “They should have, but no. They kept the tryst a secret, even after she told him she was carrying his child—”

  “You,” I said.

  Phoenix smiled. “Yes, it was me. She talked about running away and making a life together, but he knew it wasn’t possible. The Duke could provide for her; she and the babe would have a better life if she stayed. Not wanting to disappoint or upset her, he entertained her idea and listened without objection to her plans. She dreamed of being turned into someone like him, so they could be together for all eternity. He fantasized of that actually being possible, and agreed to make it happen after their child was born; she would have better care during her pregnancy and a midwife at childbirth if she stayed with the Duke until after she delivered. And then he promised her the three of them would leave together.”

  “Did they?”

  Glancing down at his timepiece, he said. “You need to shower, Mena. Rhodes will be here soon. I’ll finish the story tonight—”

  “I don’t want to go shower right now. I want to know what happened.”

  “I would rather you anticipate our next meeting together than be—”

  “Please…” I said, and reached across the table to take his hand.

  Keeping eye contact with me, he raised my hand to his lips and placed a chaste kiss on my knuckles. My whole body broke out in chill bumps.

  “Very well,” he said, and kept my hand in his as he spoke. “I want you to remember after I’ve told you everything that I asked you to wait. Do you promise to remember?”

  I nodded. “Yes, I promise.”

  “Fine. Where was I? Oh, yes, he encouraged her to stay until after the birth of their child. To make everything appear as though the baby was the Dukes, he knew she would need to bed the Duke at least once more. He hated the idea of any man touching her skin the way he did, but he knew there was no other way, for his beloved had promised she had not been with him in that manner since their wedding night. The Duke had since lost interest in her and taken a few mistresses.”

  My
chest swelled with emotion, and I fought to hold back the tears stinging my eyes. “I feel so bad for them.”

  “She returned the next night in tears. She had seduced her husband and had sex with him, but her main worry was that my father would not want her anymore. He assured her it wasn’t so, and told her that nothing could make him stop loving and wanting her. Many months went by and in her condition it was difficult for her to get away as often to go to him. He looked forward to seeing her, and never wasted a minute they got to spend together the times she did get to come. No two people in this world have ever loved each other more than they did.”

  I dabbed under my eyes with a napkin. I could hear the sadness in his voice and see it in his eyes as he stared blankly at the table in front of him. He was about to tell me something that I wasn’t going to like; I just knew it. Maybe he was right; maybe I should have just let him finish the story tonight. “Go on,” I said regretfully.

  He drew in a deep breath and exhaled fully before continuing. “Several days went by when she didn’t show up and he grew worried. He knew a normal pregnancy lasted nine months, but he had heard rumors that if a female becomes pregnant by a vampire, the pregnancy is only seven and a half months. He waited until nightfall and then set out to find her, to make sure she and their child were safe and well.”

  I squeezed his hand, but he didn’t respond to the pressure. He was re-living the memory someone had told him centuries ago. Had it been his mother who had told him? His father?

  “There was a crowd gathered when he arrived in the village. The vampire blood in his veins ran cold when he overheard two men talking about the Duke’s wife and newborn baby who would both be executed for the woman’s sins.” He paused for a moment and frowned. “I’ve wished every day of my life that he had saved her instead of me.”

  I reached up and wiped the moisture from under my eyes again, and doubted even my wolf would have been able to keep my heart from breaking in that moment.

  “My father told me that story often, and then he would tell me that he regretted his choice of rescuing me instead of her, that she was his soul mate and they were meant to be together for all of eternity. I had ruined everything for them. From as early as I can remember, he’d taught me to fight, to be a warrior, and then he would tell me that I was weak and would never be good enough or strong enough. Most times he would make me fight him until I’d lose consciousness. I was only a human boy and he was a vampire—I couldn’t defeat him. But I made myself a promise when I was fourteen.”

  “What was it?” I said.

  “That when I got to my breaking point, I would ask him to turn me, and then I would kill him. I was thirty-two when I returned from the war. With the skills he had taught me over the years, I had become a general and led my men to victory several times. He saw it only as another human weakness. I stuck to my plan and convinced him that I was worthy of immortality, that together we could conquer anything. He changed me that night, and that night I destroyed him.”

  I got up from my seat and went to him. He scooted the chair back far enough so I could sit on his lap. As I looked down into those glacier-like eyes, I knew that I disagreed with him fully; I was happy his father had chosen to save him instead of his mother. I think it was in that moment that I lost a little piece of my heart to him.

  His eyes lingered on mine and the tears that filled them. “Mena, I didn’t tell you that story to make you feel sorry for me.”

  I shook my head. “I don’t pity you. I was just thinking how happy I am that he chose to save you. I have one question, though.”

  His hand came up and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “What is it?”

  “How did they find out you weren’t the Duke’s son?”

  The gentleness left his features, but he didn’t look away from me. “You’re looking at the reason.”

  I didn’t understand. How could anyone tell by looking at a baby who the father was unless his skin was a different color?

  “My mother’s eyes were a vibrant green and the Duke’s eyes were a deep brown. I have my father’s eyes. Before my father killed him, he made sure his eyes were the last thing the Duke saw.”

  “They are beautiful,” I said.

  He grimaced. “They are a curse. They are the reason I never got to meet my mother and my father hated me.”

  “They had a great love, but he was wrong to have treated you the way he did.”

  “That’s why I vowed to never fall in love. Love always ends in tragedy.”

  I laughed lightly as my eyebrows drew down in confusion. I couldn’t ignore the twinge I felt in the center of my chest, but I tried to stop it from showing in my expression. “You’ve never been in love?”

  He shrugged. “No, and I never will be.”

  I wasn’t quite sure what I was feeling, but I did know that it was no longer sadness or happiness. I didn’t expect for him to be in love with me after only a week of us knowing each other, but if someone never intended to fall in love with another person, why the hell would they pursue them and say things like he had said to me in the last few days?

  “What?” I said, and hated the way my voice cracked. That pissed me off, and I cried when I was angry, but I knew it would make me look weak in front of Phoenix. I didn’t want to look weak. I wanted to get away from him. “Never mind,” I said as I stood from his lap and started for the bathroom to shower, but he grabbed my hand and stood.

  “Mena, what’s wrong? What did I say?”

  “It’s nothing, Phoenix. I just misread your—”

  “You thought I was in love with you,” he said, and then sighed as he released my hand.

  I should have turned and left him there, leaving our conversation incomplete—again—but we had a lot of unfinished things between us, and it was time to finalize at least one of them without running.

  “No, I don’t think you are in love with me, but why would you take an interest in someone if you never intend to love them?”

  “You’re young, Mena. Love won’t mean the same thing to you after a century or two. I don’t expect you to understand now. I like being around you. I want you. You drive me crazy! Hell, I may even be a little obsessed and infatuated with you, but all those emotions will pass. Just like love. In time… it will pass.”

  Trying to swallow the huge lump in my throat proved to be impossible. “Then why even start something that you know will pass?”

  “Jesus, Mena…” he sighed, “…this is not how I wanted our morning to go. Please, just try to understand what I’m saying before you get mad and hate me. Love is nothing more than an emotion, like hate, lust, jealousy or anger. You feel it, or your mind tells you that you do, but it isn’t who you are. You can enjoy being in the moment with someone without chaining yourself to one emotion and then getting let down. The difference between love and all those other feelings is that love is the only one that can truly break a person. You can get over anger, jealousy and hate—they don’t leave lasting damage—but when you allow yourself to love, to let go and open your heart fully, that’s when you can be destroyed, crushed. Love makes a person vulnerable; it makes them weak, and I refuse to be weak.”

  “You’re wrong—”

  “Nothing except immortality lasts forever, Mena.” He paused, drew in a deep breath and then exhaled slowly. “Did you love Marc? When the two of you got married, did you really love him?”

  I forced myself to hear him out because I was convinced I was right. I would give him the benefit of the doubt and let him plead his case, though. “Yes, I did love Marc when we got married, but he—”

  “Let you down? Correct me if I’m wrong, but I am willing to bet that you fell out of love with him long before he cheated on you. The only constant in life is change. Two people don’t always change in the same direction every time. They get separated for whatever reason and lose that connection, that bond. You were only with him for twelve years, Mena—twelve years. Imagine an eternity. Can you honestly say that you cou
ld love someone that long? I want you. I want you for as long as you’ll let me have you, but I’m not a fool to think it would be forever, the kind of forever our kind have. That’s why I can’t love you. I don’t want to become my father when you leave me,” he finished quietly.

  I could see why he was so anti-love, but I didn’t know if I could be with him knowing he didn’t love me back. No, I didn’t love him—not yet—but it was bound to happen; our attraction to each other was so strong and the man made me feel things I never knew were possible. It was only a matter of time. And then where would I be? Heartbroken.

  “I understand why you feel the way you do about love, Phoenix, but I’m not strong enough not to fall in love with you if we stay together. Too many cons and not enough pros.”

  He walked to me, and I didn’t back away. My heart was already breaking for a love that would never happen.

  “I hope that when you think about your future, you see me there with you. Love is just a word. I’m asking you to live and be happy, be strong. You are an Alpha, Mena. Love will only get in your way and cause you to make mistakes. Love will cause you to fail.”

  A knock came from the door, and I turned to look at it.

  “Enter,” Phoenix said, without taking his eyes from me.

  Jaxon poked his head in. “The detective is here to pick up Mena. Shall I let him enter your chambers?”

  “Yes, of course,” Phoenix replied, and then took a small step back.

  The door opened wider and Alex Rhodes walked into the room.

  Chapter 28

  Phoenix

  Phoenix could feel the detective’s eyes boring a hole in the side of his head, and knew very well how this particular scene appeared to him. After all, the guy was just so damn observant. The tangled sheets where Mena had slept, her in only a shirt and the fact that he was standing so close Rhodes wouldn’t have been able to squeeze between their bodies without touching both of them was enough to give him good suspicion that something had happened—or was about to.