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Why do Clocks run clockwise?

Page 23

by David Feldman


  Buns

  hamburger bottoms, thinnness of

  268 / DAVID FELDMAN

  hot dog, number of in package

  versus rolls

  Burger King wrappers, numbers on

  Burials, position of deceased

  Burping and babies

  Buses

  entry into

  idling of engines on

  ridges on sides of

  seat belts and

  Busy signals, fast versus slow, on telephones Butter

  hardening after refrigeration

  sticks, lengths of

  versus margarine, in restaurants

  Butterflies

  rain and

  sneezing and coughing in

  “Butterfly”

  Buttons, men’s versus women’s shirts

  Buzzing, bees and

  “BZ,” origins of expression

  “Cab”

  Cable TV

  channel allocation of

  volume levels of

  “Caboodle,” “kit” and

  “Caddy”

  Cadets, military, cap throwing and

  Cadillacs, ducks on

  Cafeterias, popularity of, among elderly

  Caffeine, leftover, from decaffeinated coffee Cakes

  angel food and cooling position

  reaction to loud noises

  seven layer, missing layers of

  Calculators, key pad configurations of

  Calico cats, gender of

  Calories, measurement of

  WHY DO CLOCKS RUN CLOCKWISE? / 269

  Calves, versus cows

  Cameras, black color of

  Camouflage, colors in

  Can openers, sharpness of blades on

  Canada Dry, origins of name

  Canadiens, Montreal, uniforms of

  Canceled checks

  numbers on

  returned, numerical ordering of

  white paper attachments

  Candles, trick birthday, relighting of

  Candlestick Park, origins of

  Candy

  Baby Ruth, origins of

  caramels versus toffee

  Milk Duds, shape of

  Candy ( cont.)

  Oh Henry, origins of

  placement in vending machines

  shapes of boxed chocolate

  wrapping of boxed chocolate

  “Cannot complete your call as dialed” telephone message Cans, aluminum, crushability of

  “Can’t hold a candle”

  Capital punishment, hours of execution and

  “Capital punishment”

  “Capitalization”

  Caps and gowns, at graduations

  Caps, baseball

  buttons atop

  green undersides

  Captain, Navy and Army rank of

  Caramels, versus toffee

  Cardboard on automobile grills

  Carpenter’s pencils, shape of

  CAR-RT SORT on envelopes

  Cars (see “Automobiles”)

  Cartoon characters

  Casper the ghost

  Donald Duck

  270 / DAVID FELDMAN

  Goofy

  Mickey Mouse

  Cash register receipts, color of

  Cashews, lack of shells in

  Caskets, position of heads in

  Casper the ghost, identity of

  Cassette players, audio, battery drainage in Cassette tapes, audio, on roadsides

  Cat feces, as food for dogs

  Cat food, tuna cans of

  “Cat out of the bag”

  “Catercorner”

  Catnip and effect on wild cats

  Cats

  calico, gender of

  catnip

  ear scratching

  eating posture

  hair, stickiness of

  miniature

  sight, during darkness

  swimming and

  “Cats and dog, raining”

  “Catsup”

  Cattle guards, effectiveness of

  “Cattycorner”

  Cavities, dogs and

  CDs, Tuesday release of

  Ceiling fans

  direction of blades

  dust and

  Ceilings of train stations

  Celery in restaurant salads

  Cement

  laying of

  versus concrete

  Cemeteries

  financial strategies of owners of

  perpetual care and

  Ceramic tiles in tunnels

  WHY DO CLOCKS RUN CLOCKWISE? / 271

  Cereal

  calorie count of

  joining of flakes in bowl

  Snap! And Rice Krispies

  Chalk outlines of murder victims

  Champagne

  aluminum foil on neck of

  name of, versus sparkling wine

  Channel 1, lack of, on televisions

  Chariots, Roman, flimsiness of

  “Checkmate”

  Checks

  approval in supermarkets

  numbering scheme of

  out-of-state acceptance of

  white paper attachments

  Checks, canceled

  numbers on

  returned, numerical ordering of

  white paper attachments

  Cheddar cheese, orange color of

  Cheese

  American, milk in Kraft

  cheddar, orange color of

  string, characteristics of

  Swiss, holes in

  Swiss, slice sizes of

  Chief’s hat, purpose of

  Chewing gum

  lasting flavor

  water consumption and hardening of

  wrapping of

  Chewing motion in elderly people

  Chianti and straw-covered bottles

  Chicken

  cooking time of

  versus egg

  white meat versus dark meat

  “Chicken tetrazzini”

  Children, starving, and bloated stomachs

  272 / DAVID FELDMAN

  Children’s reaction to gifts

  Chime signals on airlines

  Chirping of crickets, at night

  Chocolate

  Easter bunnies

  shapes of

  white versus brown

  wrapping of boxed

  Chocolate milk, consistency of

  “Chops”

  Chopsticks, origins of

  “Chowderhead”

  Christmas card envelopes, bands around

  Christmas tree lights

  burnout of

  lack of purple bulbs in

  purple

  Cigar bands, function of

  Cigarette butts, burning of

  Cigarettes

  grading

  odor of first puff

  spots on filters

  Cigars, new fathers and

  Cities, higher temperatures in, compared to outlying areas Civil War, commemoration of

  “Claptrap”

  Clasps, migration of necklace and bracelet Cleansers, “industrial use” versus “household”

  Clef, treble, dots on

  Clicking noise of turn signals, in automobiles Climate, West coast versus East coast

  Clocks

  clockwise movement of

  grandfather

  number 4 on

  Roman numerals

  school, backward clicking of minute hands in versus watches, distinctions between

  Clockwise, draining, south of the Equator WHY DO CLOCKS RUN CLOCKWISE? / 273

  “Cloud nine”

  Clouds

  disappearance of

  location of

  rain and darkness of

  Clouds in tap water

  “Cob/cobweb”

  Coca-Cola

  2-liter bottles

  taste of different size containers

  Cockroaches

  automobiles a
nd

  death position of

  reaction to light

  Coffee

  bags in lavatories of airplanes

  bags versus cans

  electric drip versus electric perk in

  restaurant versus home-brewed

  Coffee, decaffeinated

  leftover caffeine usage

  orange pots in restaurants

  Coffeemakers, automatic drip, cold water and Coins

  lettering on U.S. pennies

  red paint on

  serrated edges of

  smooth edges of

  Cola bottles, one-and two-liter, black bottom of Colas, carbonation in

  Cold water and automatic drip coffeemakers Colds

  body aches and

  clogged nostrils and

  liquids as treatment for

  symptoms at night of

  “Coleslaw”

  “Collins, Tom [drink]”

  Color

  blood

  274 / DAVID FELDMAN

  cash register receipts

  wet things

  Comic strips and capital letters

  Commercials, television, loudness of

  Commonwealths, versus states

  Computer monitors, shape of

  Computers

  erased files on

  monitors, shape of

  Concrete, versus cement

  Conserves, contents of

  Construction cranes, assembling of

  Construction sites

  bill posting at

  pine trees and

  soaping of retail windows

  Consumer Price Index, changes in base year of Containers, for rain measurement

  Contemporary greeting cards, shape of

  Coolers, Styrofoam, blue specks on

  “Cooties”

  “Cop”

  Copper bowls and egg whites

  Copyright pages, strange numbers on

  Coriolis effect

  Corn chips, black specks on

  Corn Flakes, calorie count of

  Corn silk, purpose of

  Corn tortillas, size of, versus flour

  Corn, baby, supermarkets and

  Cornish game hens, identity of

  “Corny”

  Corvette

  Cottage cheese, origins of

  Cotton

  in medicine bottles

  shrinkage of, versus wool

  Cough medicine, alcohol in

  Countdown Leader, film and

  Counterclockwise, draining, north of the Equator WHY DO CLOCKS RUN CLOCKWISE? / 275

  Counters on VCRs and audio recorders

  Coupons

  cash value

  expiration date

  versus mail-in refunds

  Courtooms, bibles in

  “Couth”

  Covered bridges, purpose of

  Cow Palace, naming of

  Cowboy hats, dents on

  Cows

  calves and

  milking positions

  nose rings and

  sticking of tongues up nostrils of

  CPR training in schools

  Crabs, hermit, “bathroom habits” of

  Crackling sound of fire

  Cracks on sidewalks

  Cranes, construction, assembling of

  “Craps”

  Cravings, food, pregnant women and

  Credit card receipts, printing of, at gas stations Credit card slips, and phone numbers

  Credit cards

  and waiter tips

  dipping versus swiping and

  major versus minor

  quick swiping of

  Crickets

  chapped legs and chirping

  chirping at night of

  “Crisscross”

  “Crocodile” shirts

  Crowd estimates, police and

  Crowing of roosters

  Cruise controls, minimum speeds of

  Crying at happy endings

  Cue balls, dots on, in pool

  Cups

  276 / DAVID FELDMAN

  drinking, width of

  shape of paper and plastic

  Curad bandages, wrappers of

  Curly tails of pigs

  Currency, color of

  Cursive handwriting versus printing, teaching of Curves on highways

  “Cut and dried”

  “Cut the mustard”

  Cuts, paper, pain and

  Daily doubles in Jeopardy, difficulty of Dalmatians in firehouses

  Dams, beavers and

  Dance studios, floor location of

  Dancing, men versus women

  “Dandelion”

  “Dangerous Curve” signs, placement of

  Dartboards, numbering schemes of

  DC, AC and

  De Paul University and “Blue Demons”

  “Dead End” signs, versus “No Outlet” signs

  “Deaf and dumb”

  Decaffeinated coffee

  leftover caffeine usage

  orange pots in restaurants

  “Deep-six”

  Deer, automobile headlights and

  Deer ornaments, plastic lawn

  Dehumidifiers, operation of

  Delaware, incorporations in

  Dentist offices, smell of

  Deodorant aerosols, shaking of

  Desert, rising cool air in

  Dessert, fast-food restaurants and

  Detergents, laundry

  bleach in

  package sizes of

  Detroit Red Wings and octopus throwing

  Diagonal measurement of TV sets

  WHY DO CLOCKS RUN CLOCKWISE? / 277

  Dictionaries

  pronunciation and

  thumb notches in

  Diet soft drinks

  calorie constituents in

  phenylalanine as ingredient in

  Dimples

  auto headlamps

  facial

  golf balls

  Dinner knives, rounded edges of

  Dinner plates

  repositioning of

  round shape of

  Dirt, refilling of, in holes

  Disc jockeys and lack of song identification

  “Discussing Uganda,” origins of term

  Dishwashers, two compartments of

  Disney cartoon characters

  Donald Duck

  Goofy

  Mickey Mouse

  Disposable lighters, fluid chambers of

  Distilleries, liquor, during Prohibition

  Ditto masters, color of

  “Dixie”

  Dixieland music at political rallies

  “Dixieland”

  DNA, identical twins and

  Doctors, back tapping of

  Doctors and bad penmanship

  “Dog days”

  Dogs

  barking, laryngitis in

  black lips of

  body odor of

  cavities and

  circling before lying down

  crooked back legs of

  Dalmatians and firefighting

  278 / DAVID FELDMAN

  drooling in

  eating cat feces

  eating posture of

  head tilting of

  lifting legs to urinate in

  miniature

  poodles, wild

  rear-leg wiggling, when scratched

  “sic” command

  sticking head out of car windows in

  wet noses

  Dollar sign, origins of

  Dolls, hair of

  Donald Duck, brother of

  Donkey Kong, origins of

  “DONT WALK” signs, lack of apostrophes in Doors

  double, in stores

  knobs versus handles on

  opening orientation of, in buildings

  shopping mall entrances

  “THIS DOOR TO REMAIN UNLOCKED DURING BUSINESS

  HOURS” signs, in stores

  “Doozy


  “Do-re-mi”

  Dots on cue balls, in pool

  Double doors in stores

  “Doubleheader”

  Double-jointedness

  Double-yolk eggs

  Doughnuts

  tissues and handling in stores

  origins of holes in

  Downhill ski poles, shape of

  Dr Pepper

  origins of name

  punctuation of

  Drains, location of bathtub

  “Draw a Bead,” origins of term

  Dreams, nap versus nighttime

  WHY DO CLOCKS RUN CLOCKWISE? / 279

  Drinking glasses, “sweating” of

  Dripless candles, whereabouts of wax in

  “Driveway”

  Driveways, driving on, versus parkways

  Driving, left-versus right-hand side

  Drooling, dogs and

  Drowsiness after meals

  Drugstores, high platforms in

  “Dry,” as terms for wines

  Dry-cleaning

  French

  garment labels and

  Dry-cleaning ( cont.)

  One Hour Martinizing

  raincoats and

  Dryers, hand

  in bathrooms

  “off” switches

  Ducks

  lakes and ponds and

  on Cadillacs

  Duels, timing of

  Dugouts, height of

  “Dukes”

  “Dumb [mute]”

  “Dumbbells”

  Dust, ceiling fans and

  E

  as school grade

  on eye charts

  “Eagle [golf score]”

  Earlobes, function of

  “Earmark”

  Earrings, pirates and

  Ears

  hairy, in old men

  popping in airplanes

  ringing, causes of

  Earthworms as fish food

  280 / DAVID FELDMAN

  Easter

  chocolate bunnies and

  dates of

  ham consumption at

  “Easy as pie”

  Eating, effect of sleep on

  “Eavesdropper”

  Ebert, Roger, versus Gene Siskel, billing of Egg, versus chicken

  Egg whites and copper bowls

  Eggs

  color of

  double-yolk

  hard-boiled, discoloration of

  meaning of grading of

  sizes of

  “Eggs Benedict”

  “Eighty-six,” origins of term

  Elbow macaroni, shape of

  Elderly men

  pants height and

  shortness of

  Elections, U.S.

  timing of

  Tuesdays and

  Electric can openers, sharpness of blades on Electric drip versus electric perk, in coffee Electric perk versus electric drip, in coffee Electric plug prongs

  holes at end of

  three prongs versus two prongs

  Electricity, AC versus DC

  Electricity, static, variability in amounts of Elephants

  disposal of remains of

  jumping ability of

  Oakland A’s uniforms

  rocking in zoos

  Elevator doors

  changing directions

  WHY DO CLOCKS RUN CLOCKWISE? / 281

 

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