Art of Forgiveness

by Monique Orgeron

  “Shut up, Katie. That’s not what I’m talking about. I need you to help bring that girl back to life. She needs you more than she knows.”

  “What are you talking about? I barely know the girl. She needs a mother...maybe not her mother, but I’ll have a talk with Margaret. Hopefully, she’ll take my warning to heart.”

  “No, Katie, she needs you. All of you. She needs Katie, and then she’s going to need Catherine, do you understand? You need to tell her your stories, then you need to show her how you lived through them.”

  I jump off his lap.

  “You’re crazy if you think I’m going to share my life history with that girl, or with anyone. I don’t want people knowing that side of me. I worked too hard to put it all behind me. I won’t do it, Theo, not even for you.”

  Theo stands and starts to walk towards me, and I naturally back up. I know Theo would never hurt me, but he’s very intimidating and hates when I tell him no.

  “If you won’t do it for me, then do it for your son.”

  Now I start to lose my patience. “What, son? What the hell are you talking about?”

  “I’m talking about Liam.”

  “What about Liam? He barely knows that girl.”

  Theo puts his hands in his pockets and looks at the floor, then he lets out a small chuckle.

  “You think you know everything, Katie, but you don’t. I know that boy knows her. He knows her enough to kill for her.”

  What? “No, not my Liam. He would never kill anyone. He’s not like the others!”

  “He did, Katie. When he found her, he put a bullet in each of her captors’ heads. Now what does that tell you?”

  I think about what he’s saying. It can’t be true. Not Liam.

  “I don’t know how much he knows her, but Katie, I’m telling you, a man like Liam won’t kill another man unless there is a reason to kill. I think that girl you have upstairs is that reason.”

  “She can’t be, Theo. I’ve never seen or heard him talking about her. He was her escort one time, as a favor to me, but that’s it, never anything more.”

  “Well, Katie, like I said, you don’t know everything. Your son is hurting, and he’s hurting badly. I understand that feeling, and I recognize it. That’s how I know that girl means more to him than you know.”

  I know he’s referring to me when he says he recognizes the hurt he sees in Liam. I’ll never forgive myself for everything I put him through, but he can’t be right about Liam. He just can’t.

  “Katie, if Liam cares for that girl the way I think he does, he is going to need you to help her, because if you don’t, it will destroy them both. Think about it. I know you’ll make the right decision.”

  He moves toward me and grabs my face. He kisses me the only way Theo can, with all his heart. He then backs away.

  “I’m going to leave now, Katie, but this, our relationship has to come out. I’m done being your secret. The boys are all grown men now, and I’m tired of not having you in my arms every night. You can either tell them yourself or we can both tell them, I don’t care even if I have to tell them by myself. But they will all know you are mine, that you have always been mine.”

  He leaves, and I stand there, shocked. Not only is he threatening me with telling everyone about us – which he has done several times over the years – most importantly, I’m trying to understand everything he said about Liam and Avery. How could I have missed it? There were never any signs. I remember even when I asked him to be her escort to the cotillion, he was pissed. How would he have been able to lie to me all these years? I start to cry all over again; Theo said he killed those men. I know I had my sons trained to do what needed to be done, but Liam, he’s always been my angel; he wouldn’t hurt anyone.

  Theo says I must help Avery to save my son, but I don’t know if I can. That part of my life is over. Only Theo knows the truth, and if it all came out, it might help, but it might also kill my son. I don’t know what to do. Why won’t my past just stay dead and buried? Why does it always have to haunt me?

  12

  Liam

  When I’ve exhausted my body, I head to my shower to wash off the sweat and blood from my body and hands. I dress to go to her. I can’t help myself. She calls to me even without her words, and I follow. I open the door to the bedroom she lies in. I see Avery sleeping, but I can see the pain and distress she has. Her body shifts and trembles as she moans aloud. I know she’s sedated, but she’s not peaceful. I kneel beside her bed and pass my fingers through her hair.

  “I’m here, Avery.”

  She still looks pained, so I hold and rub her hand with my fingers to soothe her. She seems to calm, but she never wakes. My tears are welling in my eyes again. Her face is bruised with what looks to be a punch to her face. It looks like someone washed and put a shirt over her body, but I can still see the bruises on her arms. I don’t know how anyone could have done this to her. Avery would never hurt a fly, but here she lies, abused. I know they raped her; I saw the dried blood that stained her skin. My mother told me she’s been missing for almost three months. It terrifies me to think of what she might have gone through.

  I dry my tears and think of the Avery I loved a long time ago. We went to school together probably our whole lives, but I was a year older than her and in a higher grade. I never noticed her until we were in high school. I used to watch as the other kids played tricks on her, and I never tried to stop the shit. I should have. Our mothers knew each other, and it should have been enough of an excuse for me to stop them, but I didn’t. She was never on my radar. I never gave her any thought until the day my mom begged me to escort her to the yearly cotillion.

  “Mom, I can’t, I’m going to escort Marcy to the cotillion.”

  “Liam, I need you to do this for me. This family needs to keep Margaret Edwards on our side. She can ruin our social growth. That woman can make it impossible for us to be socially accepted. Liam, Margaret says the girl only needs you to escort her, then dance with her once, after which you’ll be free to do whatever you want.”

  “What am I supposed to tell Marcy?”

  “I don’t care, but you will escort Avery Edwards. I don’t even know what you see in that girl Marcy anyway.”

  I chuckle. “You really want to know, Mom?”

  “No, I don’t, Liam. I’m sure you see the same thing all the other boys see between Marcy’s legs.”

  I laugh. “Fine I’ll do it, but after a dance or two, I’m out.”

  I get off the floor once I see she has remained calm and drag a chair to the corner of the room. I sit in the chair, trying to relax until I fall asleep, watching and dreaming of only her.

  I leave to meet Avery and her parents at the hall where the cotillion is being held this year. I arrive early because I’m anxious to get this over with.

  I see her parents first. I shake hands with them and accept their apologies for the change in my plans for the evening. Then I see her. I’ve seen her over the years but never really saw her until right now. She’s wearing an ugly white dress I’m sure her mother picked out. But her long blonde hair flows down her shoulders, and her face looks angelic. Her hazel eyes seek out mine, and we instantly connected on a level I cannot comprehend. She smiles, and I forget everything and everyone until her father breaks our concentration with a pat on my shoulder.

  “Liam, we really appreciate you doing this for us. Avery here couldn’t find a date if her life depended on it.”

  I see Avery’s smile disappear, and she looks at the floor in shame. I can’t believe he said that about her, and in front of her! I give him a hard-questioning look; it seems to be enough to shut him up.

  The cotillion is about to start; her father puts his arm through hers and escorts her to the top of the stairs. I find my place in line, waiting for them to descend. From here, I am to escort her the rest of the way, in front of everyone gathered to see this year’s latest debutantes.

  I stand here in my tuxedo, waiting for her turn. Whe
n she is announced, I look up and see how the light glows through her hair and lights up her face. I am done for.

  Her father passes her over to me, and it is the first time I feel how soft her skin is. I walk us around the dance floor so all the spectators can see her beauty, then we stop in our assigned spot. We wait for all the rest of the couples to take their spots, and then the first dance begins.

  I wrap my arm around her tiny waist, and she puts her hand in mine. As I lead us into our first dance, I realize we haven’t said a word to each other yet.

  “I’m sorry for what your father said about you. I’m glad I’m your escort.”

  She looks up at me and says, “Thank you. And Adam’s not my father, he’s my stepfather.”

  “Oh, I didn’t know. You have his last name.”

  “Yeah, he adopted me after my… never mind. Look, Liam, I know you really aren’t happy about this, and I know I’ll have to pay for it with Marcy, but I do appreciate you doing this for me.”

  “Don’t let Marcy bother you. I’ll handle her. Besides, I’m truly happy I’m here.”

  She looks at me, questioning. The song ends, and her father and mother are there waiting for her. Her mother hugs me and says, “Thank you again, Liam, and tell your mother I owe her. We will see Avery through the rest of the night.”

  They leave me standing there, dragging Avery with them. I guess I just got dismissed. Damn.

  Fallon wakes me. She says the doctor is here and I should leave because he wants to check her bodily injuries again.

  I see Avery is still sleeping, I shake the doctor’s hand and ask him if she’ll be okay. He tells me the injuries will heal, but the rest is up to her. I leave feeling sick.

  I clean myself off in my bedroom, then head downstairs, where I see my mother, Vin, and Zander waiting for breakfast. Nobody speaks. We’re all in a state of shock from yesterday’s events. My brother Zander looks up to me, and I know he’s concerned; I can see it written all over his face. I nod my head his way, as if to tell him I’m fine. Then our butler, Jeffery, comes in, placing the food on the table. The table remains silent until I reach out for a biscuit. My mother gasps and grabs my hand.

  “Liam, what happened to your hands? Why are they wrapped?”

  I pull my hand away from her grasp. “Nothing, they’re fine.”

  She goes to say more, but then Zander places a hand on her shoulder, stopping her. I give him a silent thank you nod. I don’t want to have to explain to my mom what I did; I’m not ready. We begin to eat in peace, then my other brother Gabriel walks in. He looks just as tired as we all do, but then I see something else in his eyes I don’t understand. It must be just the fact that Fallon’s back home safe and sound. I wish I felt that way. I’m glad my sister-in-law’s fine, but I wish the same could be said for Avery.

  Mom asks Gabriel, “Is Fallon with Avery?”

  He answers her, “Yes, but she should be down shortly. The doctor just wants to check Avery’s vitals and change a few bandages.”

  I cringe when he tells us about her bandages. I jump up when I see the doctor and Fallon approaching. Everyone stands with me.

  The doctor addresses my mother. “Catherine, I did all I could do. For now, she should rest most of the day. Tomorrow, I’ll come back and take the IV off her. I brought her some antibiotics and sedatives. I want her more alert tomorrow. Try to get her to eat and start her on the medication as needed, but don’t be surprised if she’ll need the sedatives for a while. I thank God that’s not my daughter up there.”

  My mother firmly tells him, “Roger, thank you. I hope you understand this can never get out; I want it to be her decision if she wants people to know.”

  “Don’t worry, Catherine, I understand completely. Even if it weren’t for my oath, there are some things that should never be repeated.”

  My mom and Fallon walk the doctor out as my brothers and I sit back down. I know they feel it, the shame that we couldn’t do more for Avery. Mom and Fallon rejoin us at the table, and we all start to eat again.

  After a few minutes, my mom interrupts the quiet. “Gabriel, Fallon, I think it’s time to tell everyone the news.”

  Gabriel shakes his head. “Mom, I don’t really think this is a good time.”

  “Nonsense, Gabriel, this is a perfect time. We can all use some good news. We need something to help get us through this.”

  Gabriel looks over at Fallon and grabs her hand. She nods to him, agreeing with whatever it is he’s about to tell us. They both smile and look to all of us.

  Gabriel starts, “We found out yesterday Fallon’s pregnant. I’m going to be a father.”

  Everyone stands to congratulate the couple, including me. For a brief minute, I just want to be happy for them. I lift Fallon in the air and tell her, “Mom was right. I think this is something we all needed to hear right now. I’m going to be an uncle!” I kiss her on the cheek while my jealous brother glares.

  Zander pushes me out the way to get to Fallon as Gabriel gives him a warning look Zander laughs off. “Really, Gabriel? Even with her pregnant, carrying your baby? Give it a rest, brother.”

  Vin’s next. He’s spent more time with her than any of us. We found out he’d been watching over her for almost three years before we met her. That son of a bitch might be like a brother to us, but he is extremely loyal to mom. All that time, he never said a word to any of us.

  Fallon addresses all of us. “You’re all going to be uncles. Uncle Zander, Uncle Liam and Uncle Vin.” She then kisses Vin on his cheek.

  For the next hour, we all eat and talk about the new baby. We’re all excited to have a new family member. It makes me thank God nothing did happen to Fallon, now even more. I start to wonder, they said they found out yesterday. How?

  “Hey, how did you find out yesterday? We just all got back yesterday.”

  My mother answers, “I suspected Fallon might have been pregnant, but I never had time to talk to her about it before she was kidnaped. So, when the doctor was checking her out, I had him run the test, and sure enough, my suspicions were correct.”

  She puts her head down with her faded smile. “I also had the doctor run a pregnancy test on Avery and some other blood work tests, including checking for STDs. We need to know what she could be dealing with.”

  The table becomes somber. I never thought about the fact that she could have gotten pregnant, or worse.

  “Mom, what were the results?”

  “The doctor says the senator had someone surgically implant birth control into her upper arm. He tested her just to make sure, but no, she’s not pregnant. The other results will take about a week to come in, but I asked him to rush the results as fast as he can.”

  I take a deep breath. “At least that’s some good news for her. She won’t have to worry about an unwanted child. I don’t know how she could handle having a child with her rapist. No woman deserves that. I pray the rest of the results will be negative, too.”

  Fallon clears her throat, getting all our attention. She tells us since we are all here, it was time to tell us about everything she learned.

  She starts with, “I woke early this morning before everyone. I knew Catherine would be up. I went to her office, and we talked…”

  She goes on to tell us all about her mother and how Catherine knew her. She also tells us the senator was her father. That he was planning on selling her to hide the shame of her existence. She spills everything, and I start to realize how sick that bastard was. I’m glad Gabriel killed him, because if he didn’t, I would have. I can’t believe we let Dicky Shaw live. That motherfucker is going to get his. I promise.

  13

  Avery

  I awake screaming. I have to get away. I start thrashing and kicking. I feel hands grab me and hold me down. My screams get as loud as I can make them as I try hard to get away. But I can’t. I can’t get away. Blackness takes hold of me as I hear Liam’s voice in my ear.

  “Avery, it’s Liam, baby. I have you. I won’t eve
r let anyone hurt you again. I have you, baby. I promise, Avery. I promise.”

  The darkness completely takes me now. I dream now of a day forgotten.

  I can’t believe my mother convinced Liam Stern to escort me to the cotillion. I’ve had a crush on him my whole life. Everyone has, really; he is the most gorgeous boy in school. He’s a football player with an athletic build, tall and strong. I never realized how tall he was until he held me while we danced. He has to be at least six-foot-three, while I’m five-foot-five or six. When I was introduced to him, if that’s what you call it, was the first time I was ever that close to him. His blue eyes bore into mine, and I couldn’t help smiling. He has this easy, natural look about him, blue eyes and sandy blonde hair. You know, the look of the boy next door. So handsome.

  I only had one dance with him while I wished for more. My mother and Adam dragged me away from him, and my night was over; at least I had a dance. I was finally able to feel what it felt like to be in his arms, and it was incredible; I could die now, happy.

  If last night was a dream, then today is a nightmare. All day at school, I keep getting looks and whispers about poor Avery and how Liam had to be my date and how he hated it. The girls are the worst. At lunch, I sat alone again, trying to just get through the hour. Marcy and her friends came to where I was sitting and started harassing me. They told me how there was no way in hell Liam would ever find me attractive. That if it weren’t for my mother, he would have never been my escort. Marcy goes further and tells me how Liam fucked her all night long after he left me. She goes on and on about how pathetic I am.

  My head stays down, taking their attacks until I hear Liam’s voice.

  “Hey, leave her alone. She didn’t do anything. Marcy, you don’t have to be jealous. Didn’t I find you? And didn’t I spend the rest of the night with you?”

  Marcy smiles up at him, then throws me a nasty glance. “You sure did, baby.”