Finding Infinity (Infinity Series)

by Layne Harper

  We went through the approved security list together, and crossed off a ton of names. I can’t quite figure out what the point of having a guard stand is if everyone is welcome. I was very happy to see that Jenna had already been removed from the approved list.

  I also sat down with Alice, and redefined her job description. She’s no longer in charge of my laundry, and she’s only been asked to clean our bedroom and bathroom once a week. I know that it’s petty. I know that I’m the luckiest girl in the world for having the opportunity to employ full-time help. But, and there’s always a but, I’ve got to have boundaries. This has given me the sense of grounding and personal space that I was missing.

  Colin is back on his kick for me to set a wedding date. I really don’t want to focus on that until my partnership with my dad has been resolved, and I’m working again. Baby steps…one day at a time…

  I’ve done well with my runs. Because I’ve felt so bad about punishing poor Miguel and Carter, I’ve been running the lab rat loop inside the gilded cage. Not my ideal run, but I can live with it, because I get to wake up every morning next to Colin McKinney.

  “Charrrrlieee,” he whines from the other room. “I woke up alone, and you know how much I hate doing that.”

  “Just a minute. I’m gross from my run.” I call. “Let me rinse off, and I’ll come keep you company.” I slip out of my sweat-drenched clothes.

  As soon as the lukewarm shower water blasts me, I yelp. Even though I ran early in the morning, it’s hot already for Dallas in May.

  May eleventh to be precise. Today’s my thirtieth birthday. The big three zero. I spent my run contemplating what thirty means to me, and here’s what I’ve come up with. Thirty is going to be an awesome decade. No more medical school. That was my twenties. No more pondering where I fit in this world. I know. I’m a surgeon who likes to drink wine, dance with cute boys—or, one particular boy— listen to music, read interesting books, and travel. The cherry on top is that I’m Colin McKinney’s fiancée, and I will hopefully one day be the mother of his children.

  I smile as I run the washcloth over my stomach. I imagine it swollen one day, with his baby. I haven’t gotten off the pill or anything like that, but once our life is more settled, I’m ready to be a mom. I haven’t given Colin a clue because he’ll annoy me even more about that than he already does about setting a date for our wedding.

  I turn off the shower and towel dry. When I walk into our bedroom, Colin has a cup of coffee waiting for me on my bedside table, and a muffin with one birthday candle sticking out of it.

  “Happy birthday to you…happy birthday to you…” he sings to me, sounding like he does this for a living. “Happy birthday to the woman who’ll not marry me, happy birthday to you.”

  “I assume you think that you’re funny?” I ask, as I drop my towel and reveal my birthday suit.

  “Oh beautiful girl, I know I’m funny. In fact, I’m the funniest motherfucker around.” He smirks. I love playful Colin. It’s moments like this that I wish I could bottle him, so when there are bad times I can open the bottle and have this feeling again.

  “Who says that you’re the funniest guy around?” I give him a questioning look, placing my hands on my hips.

  Colin stops for a second, looking up at the ceiling, and pondering the question. “Well, I guess I do.”

  “Good enough for me,” I say, as I launch myself on top of him.

  He lets me explore his mouth with my tongue for only a few minutes before he rolls me onto my back. “No way birthday girl. I get to spend all day taking care of you.”

  If I smile any larger, my face might crack. My last birthday was spent with Brad and my sisters at a gay country and western bar off Montrose in Houston. Lying underneath Colin is a way better birthday celebration.

  “Mrs. Colin McKinney,” he says as he plants sweet, soft kisses on the inside of my thigh. “Caroline McKinney,” he utters. He finds my favorite spot behind my knee. Each one of my toes is sweetly sucked into his full, maroon lips as he whispers my other names. “Charlie McKinney…Doctor Caroline McKinney…Caroline Jane McKinney.”

  Colin’s driving me mad. He loves his new game. Frankly, I love his new game, but I guess it’s really not new anymore. He’s been playing it for a couple of months. I gasp as he sucks the pad of my big toe between his teeth and gently nibbles.

  He flashes me his half smile. “You like that, baby?”

  I reach down and grab his dark blonde waves, and give them a gentle tug. “You’re driving me crazy. Come see me,” I say in a breathless whisper. I give his waves another tug hoping that he gets my point. I’m ready to make love to this man. Not be teased any longer.

  He reaches up and slips one finger inside of me, which makes me arch my back with pleasure. “I am driving you crazy,” he confirms with a smirk as he removes his finger, giving it a naughty suck, and goes back to focusing on my toes.

  I’m caught between a rock—being Colin’s fantastic body—and a hard place—well, that would be his massive erection that he’s been teasing me with. Dear God, I can’t take much more of this pleasurable torture. I’m in sensory overload.

  I wiggle my toes away from his mouth and bring my knees up to my chest. He flashes me a confused look, and crawls back up our large bed. “Bad girl, Doctor Collins,” he admonishes. “Now we’re going to have to start all over. Does my birthday girl need spankings?” He raises one eyebrow, giving me that knowing smile.

  He reaches down and gently, ever so softly, begins kissing my lips again. I’m way too worked up for this sort of nonsense. I don’t want sweet kisses. I want his erection inside of me, filling me up, and making me scream. I need him.

  I reach down in between my legs and find his penis. I grab it, and begin to pump it, up and down. I’m trying to communicate that this is the intensity that I want, not the sweet foreplay any longer.

  Colin reaches down and stops my hand. “Not yet, baby.”

  That’s it. I’m officially frustrated. “It’s my birthday,” I complain. “What do I have to do to get you to make love to me?” It comes out as a breathy whine. I hate the way I sound. It’s pitiful, with a side helping of desperation. Only he can make me so pathetic.

  Colin has worked his way back down to mere centimeters from my center. Just when I think he’s going to give me what I crave so badly—the mind-blowing orgasm that he’s teased me with. He whispers, “You can set a date.”

  “Fine. How about right now?” I say, as I buck my hips toward his mouth. “Colin, will you marry me? Do you promise to give me mind-blowing orgasms whenever I want them? Do you promise to make me watch all the terrible movies that I missed because I was studying? Do you promise to make me coffee every morning?”

  He nips the inside of my thigh. “I do, my beautiful girl.” He flashes me the half smile that I love. He’s clearly amused with our wedding.

  “See, now we’re married. Come inside of me,” I moan.

  “You haven’t said your vows yet,” he reprimands, as he moves away from where I want him to be and starts kissing my stomach. He’s got that glint in his gorgeous green eyes, clearly telling me that this might be his new favorite game. “Charlie, will you marry me? Do you promise to be the mother of my children?” he says, while he kisses just above my pubic bone. “Do you promise to call me on my shit?” Colin plants very chaste kisses around my mouth—much too platonic for my taste. “Do you promise to come to all my football games and wear my jersey?”

  I push him off me, and give him a huge grin. “Nope. That’s a deal breaker. I’ll come to all of your games, but I will not be the fangirl. I will not wear your jersey. That wasn’t even cute in high school.”

  He sits back on his heels, and gives me a very amused look. “What if I say that that’s a deal breaker? No jersey? No wedding.”

  I raise one eyebrow as I stare at his huge, beautiful penis. “Do you really want to play that card, McKinney? I’d be perfectly content with living in sin the rest of our lives.”r />
  That was not the answer that Colin was hoping for. Being the smart one that he is, he quickly renegotiates. “Fine, when I win the Super Bowl, then you have to wear my jersey.”

  “I need more convincing.” I cross my arms giving him a hard stare.

  He pounces on me tickling me until I scream. “I agree. I agree,” I say, through laughing squeals. “I do. Colin, quit tickling me.”

  He enters me with a thrust that takes my breath away. Playtime is clearly over. I feel all of him inside me—stretching me deliciously. This is a great birthday morning. When I catch my breath again, I say, “I now pronounce us husband and wife. Colin McKinney, you may kiss your bride.”

  His eyes light up with delight, and he captures my lips. We fall into a slow, gentle, lazy rhythm. We’re lost in each other. It’s a sweet dance, an exchange of passion, romance, and lust. My heart aches with love for this amazing man.

  He builds me up slowly to the precipice of an intense orgasm, and then gently catches me while I fall. Colin then follows me into his own bliss.

  When, I’ve recovered my sanity, I mumble, “Best birthday ever.”

  * * * *

  Colin has been planning my surprise party for a couple of weeks. I found out about it when Brad insisted that we go shopping for a fabulous thirtieth birthday dress. Considering I’d told Colin that I wanted to hang out at the house for my birthday, I knew something was up.

  Then, because I hate surprises—and, frankly, I’ve had enough surprises in the last three months to last me a lifetime—I snooped through Colin’s phone while he was in the shower. Not my finest moment, but at least I’ll look great when I fake surprise tonight.

  Rachael and Aiden are due at our house any moment. Colin’s taken the day off to hang out with us. However, I can’t wait to get my best friend alone for a little while and get the scoop. Her and Aiden are both playing coy with me. That will not stand.

  “Babe, do I need to send Jenny to the store for anything?” Colin asks, as he brushes a kiss on my neck when he’s walked into the kitchen.

  I look up and him with a goofy grin on my face. “I don’t think so. I’m fixing a fruit salad for us to snack on by the pool, and thought we could maybe grill some chicken for lunch.”

  “Sounds good. Remember we’ve got dinner plans tonight.”

  “Haven’t forgotten.” I smile inwardly. I’m actually a little excited about my birthday party.

  “So I was thinking about birthday presents for you,” Colin says as he scoots his behind on the counter next to where I’m chopping fruit. It takes everything that I have to not push his unsanitary ass off the granite. I breathe deep and attempt to ignore the totally grossed out feeling in my stomach. “What do you think about a new car?”

  “I have a car. A perfectly good one. Why do I need a car?” I reply, as I drag the blade of my knife through a strawberry with more force than necessary.

  “I was just thinking that maybe you needed something larger. Like, something that has a backseat,” Colin says as he picks up some of the already chopped pineapple and pops a piece in his mouth. He’s using his “Aw, shucks, no big deal” voice, but I know that my car is an issue for him—one that he’s just going to have to get over. He hates that it’s red, small, cute, compact, and low to the ground. If I left it up to Colin, he’d have me driving a grey Sherman tank.

  “Not in the mood, McKinney. Table the car talk.” I swat his hand as he tries to steal another piece of pineapple. “If you eat it all now, then there will be nothing left for Aiden and Rachael.”

  “Do you think that I give a fuck if Aiden has pineapple?” He laughs, and gives me his half smile. The twinkle in his eyes is rare, but it’s been present all day today.

  I roll my eyes. “I’ll add it to your list of stuff that you don’t give a fuck about.”

  “Harsh, baby,” he says as he scoots off the counter, and gives my behind a nice spank.

  I watch him walk out of the kitchen. The old saying, “Hate to see you go, but I love to watch you leave,” keeps playing on repeat in my mind.

  I go back to chopping fruit and momentarily get lost in my thoughts. The question mark hanging over my head is if my dad will acknowledge my birthday or not. He’s never missed one, but I haven’t spoken to him since I walked out of his house. Aiden has handled all the negotiations and paperwork dissolving our partnership. I’m ready for it to be over. It’s time for a fresh start.

  Just as I am transferring the fruit into a bowl, there’s a knock on the back door. “They’re here!” I yell to Colin.

  I race over and throw open the back door to find Aiden standing there with a perplexed look on his face. “Fucker changed the locks.”

  I laugh. “I’ll explain later.” Then, I catch Rachael as she barrels toward me, pulling me into a giant hug. We scream like preteen girls. I adore her. Getting to spend the day with her, Colin, and Aiden is really the best present ever. Who needs a car?

  * * * *

  Colin and Aiden are discussing something in Colin’s office while Rachael and I lie by Colin’s Vegas-inspired pool, attempting to get catch some sun without burning. For me, that means carefully applied sunscreen. For Rachael, that means SPF 45 with zinc oxide, a huge floppy hat, and a Sunbrella long-sleeved shirt over her bathing suit.

  This is the first time that we’ve been alone since her and Aiden arrived, and I’m just about to burst if I don’t get at least a little scoop.

  “So you and Aiden flew from DC together?” I ask, very nonchalantly.

  “Actually, I had business in Los Angeles, so Aiden and I flew from there.”

  “What were you doing in LA?” I take a sip of my Aiden-made margarita.

  “Oh a little of this, and some of that. Boring politics stuff.” She takes a sip of her cocktail. They are to die for.

  “Where did you stay?”

  “Oh for God’s sake, Caroline. We’ve been friends long enough. Spit it out,” she says, in her very Rachael way.

  “Just curious what the status of you and Aiden are,” I fish.

  “Simple. If we’re in the same city, we see each other. When we’re not? Out of sight, out of mind.” Her answer surprises me. Aiden and Rachael were crazy in love in college. Her laissez faire attitude towards him is unexpected.

  “So are y’all sleeping together?” It’s a logical question.

  She sits up, pulls off her sunglasses, and gives me her serious look. “That, my dear, is none of your business.” She lies back down and slides her glasses back on.

  “Sorry, Rach. I didn’t mean to pry.” Oh! I so totally did. “I’m just not used to you keeping secrets from me.”

  “Honestly, there’s really nothing to tell. My boss is gearing up for a run at the presidency. I’m so busy, that there are days that I think I should wear Depends because I literally don’t have time to pee. Aiden and I’ve found ourselves in the same city, and we’ve had dinner. Not everyone thinks getting back together with their college boyfriend is a good idea,” Rachael says, effectively closing the subject.

  I pick up my margarita and take a sip, and then lay back on the sun lounger. This is obviously a touchy subject for her. I’m confused. We usually share everything with each other.

  I still haven’t had a chance to talk to Rachael about why she and Aiden broke up. Colin said that it was because our breakup was too hard on them. It’s not that I don’t believe Colin, but I’d like to hear Rachael’s side of the story.

  “So, have you set a date?” she asks, as she slurps down the last sip of her drink. She knows that we haven’t. This is her way of redirecting the conversation to a topic that she knows I don’t like.

  “We got married this morning,” I reply and wait for her response.

  “You did not. But, that might be the only way that the media doesn’t crash it, is to make it a surprise. I saw your photographer friends hanging around outside the gate.”

  Damn! She knows me too well. I can’t get a rise out of her anymore.

 
; “Rach, I don’t know what I’m going to do. Colin is hounding me about setting a date. Brad keeps bringing me all of his wedding research. Yesterday, he decided that we should have a themed wedding. He suggested western or roller skating. What’s wrong with me? I’m missing the wedding gene.”

  She laughs. “I’d pay big bucks to see Aiden roller skate. Choose roller skating,” she all but begs. “Although I’m sure that there’s some clause in Colin’s contract that keeps him off all wheels except car tires.”

  “Girl, you should hear Brad’s ideas. If he ever gets married, I’ll be scared to attend,” I say, conspiratorially as I lean in closer toward Rachael.

  “Look, Caroline, you’ve never cared about any of the normal girl stuff. Just pick a date and let Brad do everything else, as long as it isn’t themed. I mean, seriously, it’s like four hours of your life which you have to play along. Just do it, and move on.” This is why Rachael is incredible at her job. I can see her sitting in a room with a group of politicians that can’t seem to find like ground on anything, and she’d makes them compromise. She’s got the unique ability to minimize anything and everything.

  I actually think about her words for a little while. Rachael’s right. It’s four hours of my life. Brad will do all the planning. Why am I dragging my feet? Colin has done so much for me. He relocated Brad to Dallas. He moved the football players out of our house without complaining. He agreed to work out of actual office space instead of our house, which is an inconvenience for him. I can do it. I can wear the white dress and walk the down the aisle if it makes him happy.