Crucify Thy Demons: Snakes Henchmen MC

by Grayson, Alivia

  So, I delivered Wrench’s message, brought his biker family to my cabin to take him home, and I thought that would be the end of that.

  I didn’t even want to think about the man who captured my attention like no other ever had the second I saw him, but then there he was, and I knew I would never be the same.

  Roman was his name. A sinfully handsome man with the greenest eyes I had ever seen. His body was packing tight muscle, the kind, a wrestler, would have, all bumps and perfection. He was handsome to a fault, and all I wanted was to feel his lips against mine just once.

  Hearing Roman’s voice did wicked things to my body, things I didn’t even know I could feel. My body lit up around him, and I couldn’t understand why. I was attracted to him, but I was scared of him at the same time. Maybe I was just scared of the power he had over me so quickly.

  I thought after Roman and his crew took Wrench home that would be the end of it, I would never see them again. I was wrong. Roman came back a couple of times just to check on me, he said. He could make me smile like no other, and strangely, he didn’t expect anything from me, just the pleasure of my company, he said. It was wonderful to be able to laugh, to joke, to talk to a man that I felt a connection with. I hadn’t felt that kind of connection since... I won’t go there.

  As Roman left the last time he visited me, he kissed me, and it was the best kiss I had ever had. I couldn’t deny it even if I wanted to.

  Sex frightened me, so I knew I couldn’t sleep with Roman. I knew he wanted me; only an idiot wouldn’t have realized that. However, he didn’t push me, he just took my face between his hands and told me to call him if I needed anything, and that he would be back again soon.

  Right then, I felt something growing between us. I wasn’t sure what it was or why it was happening, but deep down, I wanted to be Roman’s. I knew I would be safe with him, loved even.

  Though, I knew it could never happen. I had lived that life before, and it was hell on earth. Even though I knew Roman would never mistreat me, I had nothing to offer him. I had nothing to call my own, and my body was destroyed long ago by a psycho who didn’t know his ass from his elbow.

  What man would find a mass of scars attractive on a woman?

  On himself or his brothers?

  Battle Scars.

  A woman’s body?

  Repugnant.

  Not even the man I left behind, the man I thought was the love of my life when I was younger, would want me now. I don’t think about him any longer; I buried him a long time ago, along with my dreams.

  Bulldog, the man who once owned me, my monster, my tormentor, my pimp, found out where I was.

  How?

  I don’t know. I’d wager a guess that he followed Roman, or maybe he saw me driving back from Wrench’s place one day. I went there one more time after Wrench left, a couple of weeks after. Elie, his fianceé, wanted to meet me. She wanted to thank me for saving Wrench’s life. I didn’t want thanks, and I didn’t want to go, but Wrench begged me, and Roman said I would be safe, so I went.

  It was nice to meet Elie, a beautiful girl, so in love with Wrench. She hugged me so hard. It had been a long time since anyone hugged me like that. I held onto her for a while because it felt like I was holding my little sister. Not that I have one of those, but if I did, I imagine that’s what it would have felt like. Then Elie and I talked and laughed until I decided it was time to go home.

  I never made it there.

  Around halfway back to my cabin, my car was stopped abruptly by bikers – bikers I had wished I would never see again. They were all around me, behind me, beside me, in front of me. I was terrified because I recognized their cuts right away. Devils Roadkill. They’d found me, and they were there to take me back with them, and God only knew what Bulldog would do to me for escaping.

  Bulldog was there, of course, and he dragged me from my car by my hair. I didn’t scream because I knew that would be futile. Nothing would save me from what was coming.

  Bulldog beat the hell out of me, and then fucked me right there against my car, in front of everyone, just like the whore I once was to him. He was never bothered who saw him taking what he deemed his. He didn’t give a damn who saw me like that, nor who saw the damage he’d done to me. Those sick bastards all got off on it.

  When Bulldog had finished humiliating me, he told me to get the fuck on the back of his bike because he was taking me with him. I got on the back of that bike without question.

  What else could I do?

  I had no way of outrunning them, and definitely not when they all carried guns. There were six of them there that day, and not one of them tried to help me.

  I expected nothing less when I knew how loyal they were to Bulldog. They all did whatever he told them to do, and they gave not one damn about me.

  Bulldog took me back to the Devils Roadkill clubhouse, the place that had been my prison for so long. I was made an example of in front of the whole club. Every member, prospect, old lady, and even club whore gathered in the center of the main bar room, and they watched as Bulldog tore my shirt from my body. A prospect then held my hands together, my arms out in front of me, as Bulldog whipped me with his bullwhip ten times. I bit back the screams, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of hearing them, but it was hard.

  Once the whipping was over, Bulldog took me to his room where he forced me to suck his cock before he ripped the rest of my clothes from and fucked me all night long. He never came inside of me, that’s not what you do with a whore – whores are for ejaculating all over like the filth they are, or so he once told me.

  Bulldog finally passed out in the early hours, and I was left sore, and in so much pain, I could hardly move. I felt hopeless, and I cried my heart out. I had fought so hard to get away from him, yet there I was right back where I started with no hope of getting away again. I knew then that Bulldog would keep me under lock and key, and there would never be any way of me leaving. He’d kill me first.

  Bulldog was old enough to be my father and then some. Fifty-odd years old – I never did know his actual age – to my twenty-six years. Bulldog rarely washed, his teeth were falling out his head from the rot in his gums, and having his old hands on me, and his mouth all over me was enough to make me vomit. I never understood how he could go all night, but I guess it was the enhancing drugs he took.

  How else would it explain it?

  The following day, Bulldog allowed me to shower. It was agony; every part of me hurt. Bulldog told me that he had club business to attend to, and I was to be locked inside his room until he returned. If I were a good girl, he’d feed me, if not, I’d starve. I knew he meant it; he always meant what he said.

  Bulldog told me that if I needed him for any reason, there would be a prospect right outside the door, all I had to do was knock on it, and the prospect would help me. I merely nodded and watched him leave.

  Bulldog made one mistake that day – a mistake I picked up on even before he left the room, an error that changed all our lives. He left his cell on the bed. I knew in my heart that I had approximately two minutes before he realized it was gone and would be back for it, and I wasted no fucking time at all in dialing the one number I had memorized off by heart. Roman’s. I only prayed he’d pick up.

  He did. However, he snarled because he thought I was Bulldog. I rushed to make him listen and to be understood. I didn’t give him a chance to answer, I just rattled off what had happened, where I was, and what Bulldog was doing and would continue to do to me should Roman not help me, before I told him not to call back because Bulldog would kill me. Then I ended the call and erased the number from the phone. I placed it back on the bed just in time to hear the lock turn in the door. I rushed to lay down.

  Bulldog looked at me lying there, and he actually smiled. Freak. I’d managed to push the cell slightly under the shirt Bulldog has left on the bed, just sticking out enough for him to see it, and to make it look like I hadn’t seen it. He took it and without a word left again.
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  Two hours later, the clubhouse was ablaze. People were screaming, running for their lives with no way out. I hadn’t a clue what had happened. All I knew was that I was going to die locked in that room.

  I heard gunshots as I pushed a blanket against the bottom of the door to slow the smoke filtering into the room. Why in the hell there were no windows, I don’t know. However, I didn’t panic; if it were to be my end, then I would go out sleeping on the bed. That way, I wouldn’t feel much of anything. So I took myself over there and lay down and closed my eyes.

  I drifted in and out of conscious, but I could hear voices, feel hands on me. However, I couldn’t make anything out; it was just too dark, too hot, too close.

  I woke up in a different room, in a cleaner place — Roman’s bedroom. I shot up in bed, and he was there to catch me. He held me close and tight while telling me how he’d taken me from Bulldog’s room and brought me to his clubhouse. A doctor had checked me over and told Roman that I was going to be okay, I didn’t have smoke inhalation because Roman got me out in time.

  The clubhouse had burned down to the ground because Hawk, one of Roman’s brothers, his cousin by blood, had set it alight while the rest of them went through the place and killed every remaining member of the MC.

  Most were asleep with their whore’s or women. Even they were put down like dogs. Bulldog had fought back and shot an older member of Roman’s MC, but he’d live, nothing life-threatening. Shepard, president of Roman’s MC, finally ended Bulldog’s life with a bullet through his godforsaken chest.

  I cried because I was finally free. Devils Roadkill MC Tennessee Charter was no more. That monster couldn’t hurt me ever again, and I had the beautiful biker in front of me to thank for that.

  That’s when I asked Roman to make love to me, to make me forget everything Bulldog had ever done to me. If Roman had been anyone else, there is no way on this earth; I would have let him kiss me, let alone ask him to have sex with me. However, with Roman, I felt safer than I ever have in my life before.

  Roman grabbed the hem of my t-shirt so he could undress me, but I stopped him. I couldn’t take my shirt off in front of him. I couldn’t let him see what lay beneath. However, I shucked off my jeans and panties and pushed his hand between my legs, telling him to feel how wet he made me. Roman kissed me, and we looked into each other’s eyes the whole time we were making love. I’d never felt anything like it before. It was special and perfect, everything I had ever imagined it would be with a man.

  When it was over, he held me so tight, and I felt so safe. He whispered in my ear how he’d take care of me, how he’d protect me, how I was his now, and no one would dare touch me if they wanted to live. I wanted to be his; jy god, did I want to be his, but it wouldn’t and couldn’t happen. I couldn’t stay with him. I was too messed up inside even to try, and he deserved more than I could have given him.

  So, while Roman slept, I showered away the evidence of what we’d done. I cried my heart out in that shower because I had to go, and go I did. In the very early hours, I kissed Roman’s head and left his room.

  I encountered the VP, Jett. He’d come to the clubhouse early, leaving his young family at home. The president of the club is Jett’s father, and as he would be out for a while due to his youngest daughter being so ill, it was down to Jett to make sure everyone knew what was what. He asked me why I was leaving. I told him the truth. He gave me a ride out of town.

  * * *

  I look at my life sometimes, and I wonder what the hell I’ve done with myself. I work in a shitty restaurant, earning shitty money, and I live in a shitty apartment with shitty furniture. I could have gone back to my cabin, but I knew Roman would find me right away if I did. I miss it though, my cabin; I was comfortable there.

  I’m alone in the world now, and by that, I meant entirely. Okay, I was alone for two years before this, but somehow, I feel so much more alone now than I ever have. I only have two friends in the whole world, and I’ve only seen one of them a handful of times since I left the clubhouse and came here to Cedar Hill. Bardsville isn’t all that far, but just enough distance for me to be away from the MC and Roman.

  My life may be shitty, but I need to get my life together; I don’t have much time left. Hell. I didn’t even realize how fast time goes by. However, it’s been eight months since my night with Roman. God, that incredible night.

  It’s been eight months since Roman told me that I was his. Eight months since I said that I needed him, and wanted to be his. I shouldn’t have told him that when I wasn’t ready for anything more. I know I hurt him. I can feel it in my gut. I also know that he hates me for leaving the way I did, and I have no idea how I would ever be able to make him understand.

  Roman has no doubt been doing the biker thing, fucking everything with a cunt between its legs. Not that it’s any of my business, I was the one who walked away. It just hurts to think about it because he should’ve been mine. He would’ve been mine had I not run.

  I miss him so much. I’d fallen in love with him over the time he’d been coming to see me. He made me laugh, made me feel safe, and I hadn’t felt safe in a very long time.

  I saw a future with him right by my side. I even saw us as man and wife. Crazy, huh? However, it was a dream I allowed myself when I was alone in my cabin home. I would dance around, hug myself and smile so wide. I hadn’t felt so happy in years.

  When Roman would come to visit me, we’d eat the food he brought – food I hadn’t eaten in a long time since I’d been hiding away from the world for so long. I mostly ate what I sourced myself.

  Roman would watch me eat, a smile on his face. It would make me nervous at first, but he took those nerves away with his encouraging words. Roman even danced with me a couple of times. He pulled me against his big body and wrapped his arms around my waist. I laid my head against Roman’s powerful chest and let him guide me.

  Roman and I would even sit out on my porch and watch the sunset. Roman would hold me and tell me how I deserved to be happy, how I deserved to be somebody’s everything. I began to believe he could be my someone.

  I hated when he left me there alone. I wanted him to stay with me, but I knew I couldn’t allow it. I knew what he’d expect to happen, and I just wasn’t ready for that. Not even with the man, I was slowly falling in love with.

  It’s kind of lonely here. I’ve given myself a solitary life, much like when I was at the cabin, only now I don’t have Roman to take my mind off it all.

  When I’m not working, I’m at home. I don’t feel safe anywhere. Even in a town this small with just a little over three hundred people, I still feel like someone is out to get me, which is crazy when the threat is gone from my life.

  Whenever Elie calls, she tells me that nothing can hurt me now, but I don’t believe it. I want to, God, do I want to, and maybe I will in time, but everything is still too raw. I suppose being alone all the time doesn’t help when I have nothing else to do but think about things.

  A knock at the door pulls me out of silly thoughts of the past and the man I left behind.

  “Coming!” I yell.

  It will be Elie and the baby. No one else ever visits me. That and she called me this morning to let me know she’d be here at lunchtime.

  I open the door and baby Kaleb instantly squeals and holds his arms out to me. I take him from his mother and hold him close to my body. Kaleb is seven-months-old, beautiful, and always happy to see me. Kaleb was born a few weeks early, but he was healthy, which was a blessing when Elie lost Kaleb’s twin brother, Joshua, at five months gestation. The grief of thinking she’d lost the man she loves to murder caused her to have a traumatic miscarriage. One baby died, one survived. Elie didn’t even know she was carrying twins at the time.

  Wrench called me the day Elie went into labor. He said that she was asking for me, which hurt more than I could tell you. We’d quickly become best friends. The fact she was in premature labor was frightening for her, and she needed me. Her parents were th
ere with her, so was Wrench, but she wanted me also.

  I couldn’t stop myself from crying because I knew I couldn’t go to her, not when I knew Roman would be in the waiting room with Hawk and Brooke, Taylor, and BlackJack. Elie and Wrench’s family.

  Wrench understood, but he hated lying to his cousin, the man he classes as his brother. It hurt me to think I was the one who’d made him lie. In the end, I asked Wrench to give Elie the phone so that I could talk to her. I needed to explain that even though I couldn’t be there with her, I was there in spirit.

  She cried the second she heard my voice. I’ve never had a friend who needed me so much. Hell, I had no friends for years after I was given to Bulldog, Elie was and is my only friend, apart from Wrench, of course.

  I told Elie how everything would be just fine, that Kaleb couldn’t wait any longer to meet his beautiful Mommy and Daddy, and how nothing would happen to that little boy because his big brother was looking down on them, protecting them both.

  Elie sobbed to me and made me promise that I would never leave her, that I’d always be her best friend, her big sister. My heart was so full of love for her that day. I’m over five years older than Elie, only seven years younger than her mother, but they both in some way feel like my sisters.

  Is that crazy?

  Coral was so good to me on the phone that day. After I told Elie that I loved her and would always be there for her, that as soon as Kaleb was born, Wrench would collect me and I’d come to see her, she calmed right down and handed the phone to her mother.

  I had no intention of going there unless it was late, and everyone else had gone home. Coral told me how thankful she was to me for calming her daughter. Elie was now smiling and willing to birth her son instead of screaming how he couldn’t be born yet. Yes, it was too soon, but there’s no stopping labor when it hits.