Switch Him Up & Turn Him On

by Marie Medina

  Switch Him Up & Turn Him On

  Marie Medina

  Shadows of the Night Press

  Copyright © 2020 by Marie Medina

  First Publication: April 2013, September 2013 (Evernight Publishing)

  Combined Edition: August 2020

  Cover design by Covers by K Design

  All cover art copyright © 2020, Shadows of the Night Press.

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  Contents

  Switch Him Up

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Turn Him On

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Epilogue

  About the Author

  Also by Marie Medina

  Switch Him Up

  Alec couldn’t be more surprised when the “burglar” he swings a baseball bat toward turns out to be Christian, the lover who walked out on him six months ago. He never imagined Christian would come back, but secretly his heart had continued to hope all that time.

  Christian returns to Alec, ready to face the consequences of his rash actions and deal with all of the issues he still has with trust in relationships. He can feel that Alec wants him, but Alec makes it clear he’s tired of being the pushover in their relationship. Christian struggles not to be possessive and dominating, while Alec learns how erotic it can be to make another submit to his will. Can Christian learn to submit completely, or will he lose everything because he can’t let go and trust his lover?

  Turn Him On

  Alec and Christian have been back together for a year. Christian wants to celebrate this milestone because they’ve both been busy and stressed out for weeks. However, one thing after another keeps adding more stress to their situation. Christian knows they’ve come a long way and wants to keep moving forward in their relationship.

  Alec loves how much Christian has changed and how much having Christian back in his life has changed him. They’ve worked through so many problems, and they’ve both grown in their relationship, but each time they find a moment to breathe, something else demands their attention. Alec just wants to build a home with Christian so their love can continue to grow, but he can’t help worrying that the pressures of life will never stop coming between them. When a new source of stress threatens to push him to the breaking point, Alec has to take action as he holds to his belief that their love is worth fighting for.

  Switch Him Up

  Chapter 1

  Alec froze when he heard a key slip into the front door of his apartment. Silence followed, but then the key turned very slowly, as if the person didn’t want to be heard. Silence again. He checked the bedside clock, which showed two minutes until midnight. Did some drunk person have the wrong apartment? Maybe he’d only imagined hearing the locking pins give way. He threw his book aside and jumped out of bed when he heard the knob turn and the door creak open. His hand found the baseball bat that always rested next to his bed, and he advanced slowly. If he could be as quiet as the intruder, he might stand a chance. Standing at only five-nine and weighing maybe one hundred and eighty pounds, Alec usually backed down from any physical conflict, but what choice did he have? He wasn’t going to hide in a closet while someone robbed him. His cell phone was charging in the kitchen, so he couldn’t even call for help from where he was. He had to try to stop the intruder himself.

  As Alec tiptoed down the hall, the intruder came into sight. The guy was over six feet tall, broad-shouldered, and well muscled from what Alec could see. Why was he simply standing in the middle of the living room? Letting his eyes adjust to the dark? A chill went through Alec. Or had the burglar heard someone in the apartment and tensed for a fight? Alec took his chance and swung the bat at the man’s head, gasping in surprise when the guy whirled around and stopped the bat with one hand. Their gazes met, and Alec stumbled back and dropped the bat, fear gripping him. He wasn’t worried this guy would rob him, but he had every reason to believe the man would break his heart. Again.

  “Alec?”

  The whispered word caused Alec to draw in a sharp breath, but for a moment he couldn’t get his lips to move. He slid down the wall, unable to stand any longer as his legs shook.

  “Alec, are you hurt?”

  A lamp came on, and Alec looked up into Christian’s deep blue eyes as the man knelt beside him. Alec shook his head.

  “You look awful,” Christian said, reaching out to touch Alec.

  Alec slapped his hand away and found his voice as anger surged within him. “How would you look if your lover walked out on you because of a misunderstanding? How do you think you’d look after six months of silence and anguish?”

  Christian’s normally unreadable expression cracked a bit as he hung his head. “I came back because I found out it was a misunderstanding. I’m sorry.”

  Alec struck out and hit Christian on the shoulder, hardly budging him even an inch. “You’re sorry? That’s a pile of shit. I told you it was a misunderstanding the day it happened. I left you hundreds of messages! I scoured this city and couldn’t find you!”

  “I went home and stayed with my grandmother. Got a job and didn’t look back.” Christian raised his head. “I didn’t want to be in the city without you.”

  “So you were just going to come in here and slip into bed with me? Seriously?” He waited for an answer as they searched each other’s faces. He would never admit that such a plan would likely have worked, that he probably would have willingly gone into Christian’s arms and forgiven him. He had to stay strong. As long as they didn’t touch, Alec believed he would be able to resist.

  “No. I was going to sleep here on the couch and wake you up with breakfast. The first of many apologies.”

  “You’ve got a lot of those to make. Our friends, Dr. Frances, your landlady. I took all your shit and stored it because I felt bad for her. She couldn’t bring herself to get rid of it. Yeah, she was always a bit weird, but she’s a sweet old lady, and you had her worrying herself sick. Things were insane in the department, and everyone had to jump in and do your work until we found another assistant. I had to teach your freshman labs. Dr. Frances was very disappointed because you were always his favorite grad student, which of course made you his favorite employee after graduation. Everyone was scared and wanted to call the cops, but we knew they’d just laugh at us.” Alec took a breath and glared at Christian. “And honestly, I can’t see why you’d want me back at all. You obviously have a pretty fucking low opinion of me, given what you assumed.”

  Alec struggled to his feet and started down the hall, but Christian grabbed his arm. Alec tried to pull away, but as always Christian was much too strong. “Let me go,” he whispered.

  “No.” Christian yanked Alec back to the floor and pinned him beneath him. “Just listen.”

  Alec could hardly breathe as he lay trapped beneath Christian’s amazing hard body. Christian had straddled him and pinned his hands over his head. Alec couldn’t take Christian being so close, and he soon worried his cock would give him away. He hated being so weak, hated still being in love with the man who had nearly destroyed him.

  “You had a crush on Taylor when we met. You told me that. Even after we started dating, you still blushed around him all the time. All he had to do was say ‘please’ and you’d do anything for him. I had good reason to believe he would steal you away from me if he only t
ried.” Christian flexed his grip of Alec’s wrists and lowered his face until they were only two inches away from kissing. “When I came in here and saw you kissing him, I almost lost it. I had to run because I would have killed him. You were on the floor beneath him. His hand was under your shirt, and you two were locked in a very fierce embrace. When you parted,” Christian paused, closing his eyes for a moment, “you just kept looking at him, completely drunk on his kiss. You didn’t even look up when you heard my voice.”

  Alec turned his head away because the pain in Christian’s eyes clouded his thoughts. He had to be strong now, or he’d never be free. “I left you all those messages. You know my side, so I have nothing to say.”

  “Taylor moved to Bellington. I saw him while I was shopping for my grandmother one day.” Christian sighed. “And I met his fiancée. She’s very nice. He caught up to me in the parking lot and begged me to have lunch with him. I agreed. He explained it all. How he was scared about settling down and tried to seduce you. The way you rejected him. And how fucked up you were after I left.”

  “Please get off of me, Christian.” Alec closed his eyes and waited.

  “Alec, I’m sorry. I should have believed you. I should have stayed and talked it out.”

  “Please, Christian.” Alec’s voice cracked as he said the words.

  Christian leaned down and kissed his cheek, then his neck. “Don’t cry. Don’t. I can’t take it right now.”

  Alec’s eyes flew open as he jerked his hands free and shoved Christian as hard as he could, pounding his fists against the larger man’s chest. “You can’t take it? You can’t fucking take it? I had no choice but to take it when you disappeared. I hadn’t cried more than a few tears since my kitten died when I was six, but it was like goddamn Niagara Falls around here for weeks. Now get off of me!”

  Christian grabbed both of Alec’s hands and pinned them down again. “Stop it. You’ll hurt yourself.” He spoke very softly and didn’t make any further move as he waited for Alec to still.

  Alec’s strength gave out, and he lay there panting and furious. “I could never hurt myself as badly as you did.”

  Christian slumped forward, resting his head on Alec’s chest while still keeping a firm grip on Alec’s hands. “I’m sorry.”

  Alec hated how fast his heart was racing, and he resented how anger and six months of celibacy had his cock hard and pressing against Christian’s stomach.

  “Alec, you can hate me if you want to, but leaving was my mistake before. I won’t leave this time, no matter how many times you tell me to. I want to talk and work things out. If you can’t completely forgive me now, I understand, but I want to settle this. And I want a chance to get you back.”

  “Your argument would have more weight if you didn’t have me pinned as if you’re a goddamn molester. Get the fuck off of me!” Alec struggled. “You always did this. And you enjoyed it, how easily you could subdue me.”

  Christian stiffened, but he actually moved off of Alec, slinking away to rest against the wall. The pain in his eyes told Alec he’d hit a nerve, which gave Alec a hint of pleasure and calmed him a bit. Christian shook his head as if he were dazed. “I had no other choice. You always had the emotional advantage. I didn’t have any other way to feel like you were truly mine.”

  Alec stared at him, confused. “I never had any kind of advantage with you. Everything was always on your terms.” He pushed to his feet and headed to his bedroom. “It’s late, and you’re upset, so don’t drive. Just sleep on the couch.”

  “Okay.”

  When Alec reached his door, he turned and said, “You come in here at any point tonight, and we will be done. Completely. I will never speak to you again if you get in this bed with me.”

  Christian nodded, the anguish on his face seeming so out of place. Alec turned away. Seeing Christian weak in any way was completely unnerving—and disturbingly arousing—so Alec went into his bedroom and closed the door. He wanted to ram his fist through it, but instead he leaned against it and soon sank to the floor and let the tears fall. The anger and hurt rolled off of him in waves, and letting loose did make him feel better. He had to cover his mouth with his hand several times to keep from making noise. Eventually, he managed to calm the storm and breathe more easily. He washed his face and drank some water, and then he got back into bed. Closing his book, he sighed before reaching over to turn out the light. The apartment remained silent, and he tried his best to sleep but ultimately failed.

  Christian watched the bedroom door close, and then he moved across the floor to lean against it. Though he didn’t hear anything, he felt Alec’s weight hit the door. Soon he felt it shaking, though still he didn’t hear a sound. The tears had been there in Alec’s beautiful brown eyes, so Christian knew he was crying. Every fiber of his being urged him to break the door down and take Alec into his arms. But he simply sat there. Sex was not the answer, even though he had felt Alec’s erection, and his own hunger for Alec threatened to unhinge him. Alec had called him a molester, and he’d accused him of getting off on being physically stronger. Alec hadn’t exactly said those words, but the implication had been clear. Christian had always loved dominating Alec physically, and he would readily admit it, but he’d never known Alec didn’t like it or that he saw it as Christian taking an unfair advantage. Alec had bottomed their first time together—it had simply worked out that way without them having to talk about it. Had Christian misread Alec’s desires? Had he missed the fact his lover was a switch? Guilt washed over him as he realized they’d never once discussed things like that.

  So we had problems before the misunderstanding, and I didn’t even know it. No wonder he hates me. Christian sighed. His idea of awakening Alec with breakfast in bed had seemed romantic an hour ago. He’d seen it as a way of crawling back and humbling himself, since Alec had always been the one to cook and do other practical things when they were together, no matter whose apartment they were at. But now he saw that the plan was presumptuous and rash, and he wouldn’t blame anyone for calling it crazy. He’d spent the last week in furious preparation, thinking of nothing but Alec since the day he’d had lunch with Taylor. Christian had spent six months burying himself in his new job and working with his grandmother’s church and all of her charities.

  Had bottling up all of that pain skewed his way of thinking? Alec’s reaction told him it had. He should have called or sent an email. He remembered coming back the next day to drop his key through the mail slot. He’d kept it because as he’d approached the building, he’d seen Taylor coming out of the apartment, as if he had spent the night. Christian had fled immediately, unwilling to face any of it. Of course, he now knew Taylor hadn’t spent the night. He’d simply stopped by on his way to work to see if Alec was okay. After everything had been explained, Taylor had apologized again and then had given him a very quiet but exceedingly thorough dressing down for hurting Alec the way he had. Those words had all been swirling in his head for a week, and he fully acknowledged how true they were as he sat there and felt the door behind him trembling from his lover’s silent sobs.

  Christian closed his eyes, exhausted by his thoughts. He’d blown tonight, and he knew that. However, tomorrow was his next chance, and he had to find a way to keep Alec listening, despite the fact it was the one thing he himself had been unwilling to do six months earlier.

  Christian awoke as he fell backwards, and his head hit the carpeted floor with a thwack. He groaned and gazed up at Alec, who looked first stunned and then angry.

  “You slept outside my door? Are you kidding me?” He stepped over Christian and stormed down the hall. “Staying glued to me now isn’t going to make up for you running away.”

  Christian sat up and got to his feet. He straightened his clothes and tried to smooth his dark hair as he followed Alec into the kitchen. Alec’s face blazed red, and Christian wondered if embarrassment might be mixed with the anger, if he guessed Christian might have known he was crying the night before. “Are you okay?
”

  Alec’s eyes flicked up venomously. “After last night, how the hell could I be okay in any way?” He pushed back his tousled brown hair in seeming frustration. “What an idiotic question.”

  “I guess I should have tried calling first—”

  Alec cut him off. “Yes! Because I would have answered. If you had made any contact with me at all at any point, I would have dropped everything right away and talked to you.” He slammed his hand against the side of the refrigerator. “God, can’t you see that everyone was worried? Something could have happened to you, and we’d never have known. Yes, if you’d called you would have gotten an earful, but not until after you had assured me that you were all right.”

  Christian kept his gaze trained on the counter. “I’m sorry. I know I’m going to say this so many times,” he lifted his eyes, “but I do mean it.”

  Alec looked him over for several moments. “I’m not saying that I don’t believe you, but I’ll be more ready to truly accept the apology when I see a change in your behavior.”

  He perked up a bit, as Alec’s attitude implied he wouldn’t shut Christian out. I do still have a chance. “What kind of change?”

  “Everything. The way you try to control everything needs to go first and foremost. I don’t want you pushing anything physical with me. And I want you to apologize to everyone else. I’m not going to just take you back and then smooth it all over with them. You need to talk to everyone you hurt or wronged or scared and make it right.”