From Lies to Promises

by Lynn, Faith S

  “Thanks, I try.” Ryder grabs our phones off the counter where they have been all night and hands mine over. “I am in so much trouble.” I tell him while I scroll through my phone on the ride home.

  “Why?”

  “Lexi and Skeigh texted and called me all night wondering where I was.” Shit.

  Pulling into the driveway he makes no attempt to get out of the car with me. “Oh no mister, you’re the reason I have a firing squad waiting on me in there. You’re coming in.”

  “No, ma’am. You deal with your friends, I have mine to deal with.” He answers. “I have to go talk to Jake.”

  Chapter 14

  I got a proper scolding from the girls for not letting them know I was staying the night with Ryder. Over the next month things continue in a pattern. My feelings for Ryder continue to grow. We have had sex a few more times and each time, little by little Ryder has knocked down a different wall of mine.

  I’ve been to the hospital with Ryder to visit Bethany. She actually convinced me to call her Ol’ Beth like everyone else. That woman is what you would call a force of nature. I can see why Ryder cares so much about her.

  I’ve been meeting up with Victoria about twice a week telling her my story. Our first session I wasn’t able to give her much, but it has gotten easier each time. She already started typing up the story and told me at the rate we are going we might not have to do this but for another week or so. I haven’t gotten the nerve to read my mother’s interview with Victoria yet, and I may never.

  Sitting on my bed looking over what she has written so far on the article, I have papers from all her interviews scattered everywhere. I finally pry myself up to get ready when I look at the time. Tonight I am meeting Ryder’s dad. I am nervous because I don’t know what to expect or what his father will think of me.

  “Would you quit running around the house like a chicken with its head cut off and sit the fuck down?” Lexi says. “He is going to love you.”

  “You are just saying that because that’s what you are supposed to say. There is no way you could know that for sure.” I fire back at her and run down the hall to get my shirt out of the dryer.

  “Of course it is what I am supposed to say,” She pauses following me into the bathroom so I can get ready, “but that doesn’t mean it isn’t true.”

  I turn around and give her a hug. “Thanks.”

  Skeigh comes in my room, moments ahead of Ryder, to tell me to chill out and it will be ok. Dave took her to their dad’s house last week and she said he was real nice.

  On the ride to his dad’s, his hand comes to rest high on my thigh, bringing thoughts of Thursday back to me. I had just got through with classes when Ryder called me to come by the shop to see him for a little while. He didn’t answer me when I walked in calling his name, instead he hid in a dark corner to jump out and scare the ever loving crap out of me.

  I jump and scream at him, “Holy shit, Ryder! What the fuck?” He pulls me into him and I bury my head in his neck. My body is shaking not only from adrenaline but because of the laughs coming from his chest as he holds me close. “Don’t do that again.” I tell him as my heart slows.

  “I’m sorry.” He says looking down at me and brushing the hair that has fallen in my face away. A smirk jumps on his lips. “I got you good, huh?”

  “Yea, you did.”

  His hand cradles my face as I stand on the tips of my toes and drag my lips over his once, then twice. Then his hand is on the nape of my neck pulling me in closer. Plunging past my lips, his tongue caresses mine as he backs me into a car. In between breaths I ask him where his brother is at and he tells me he left early today.

  Ryder makes quick work of my shirt and bra. Pushing me back onto the hood of the car, his mouth travels down my throat to my beast, his tongue circling my nipple. After he undoes my pants his hand vanishes under my panties, finding me dripping wet with desire. Biting on my lip, my head rolls from one side to the other.

  Cupping me, I grind into his hand, his thumb grazing my clit. He drives one finger into me, and when a soft moan comes from me, he stops long enough to take my pants all the way off. When he starts again, I am on the verge of melting on the hood of this car when he stops and stands up. I whimper and open my eyes to find him stripping, and he isn’t wasting any time.

  Ryder stands there completely naked and unashamed. My skin all over heats up as he takes me in, it’s hard but I don’t cover myself because I know he hates it when I do. His hands run up my legs to my thighs, spreading me open before him. Lowering his mouth, it finds my nipple as his fingers start giving attention where it is needed the most. I am nothing more than a writhing, quivering mess in his gifted hands.

  As Ryder drops kisses down my stomach, his fingers never missing a beat, then a kiss to the inside of each thigh. I know what he is about to do, I shoot up to my elbows, “Wait, no.”

  “What? What’s the matter?” He asks taking his fingers out of me. I take a deep breath and tell myself this is Ryder, just Ryder. But can I recover this moment from my almost freak out? What will he think?

  “It’s nothing.” I grab his face in my hands. “I just want you up here.” Then I kiss him. I kiss him with everything that I have, hoping he will forget what just happened. When he starts kissing me back I know it must have worked. Within seconds he enters me and I am shaking. I am shaking from the pleasure and fear he makes me feel. Fear of the pleasure he makes me endure, and the feelings I have for him.

  Ryder continues to pump into me until we come apart together. Lying there holding Ryder against me, feeling his heart beat against mine, I realize how far I have fell for this man. It’s a new to me, but it feels right. Everything feels right with Ryder.

  Pulling myself out of the memory, I realize that the car is immobile. As I open the car door to get out Ryder stops me by pulling me in for a quick hard kiss to the lips. He pulls back and says, “You ready, darlin’?”

  I manage to nod my head once and swallow the lump in my throat. He doesn’t bother knocking when he gets to the door just walks on in and hollers that we were here.

  “Out here!” A deep voice rumbles from afar.

  With my hand in his, Ryder pulls me through a series of halls and doors till we are on a screened in porch. It is a rainy cold day but there are a few heaters in the corners making it cozy out here. There is a man sitting at a high top table playing solitaire. When he raises his head there is no doubt that this is Ryder’s father. An exact pair of green eyes that match the man I have fell for staring back at me.

  He sets the deck of cards down, stands and gives his son a big hug slapping him on the back. “You need to come see your old man more often.”

  “I know dad I’m sorry. The shop has been extremely busy the past couple of months and between it and checking up on Ol’ Beth it has been nuts.” Ryder explains.

  “Oh, and I am sure this lovely thing here has nothing to do with you being so busy either, huh.” He laughs and turns to me.

  “Dad, this is my girl, Katrina Brown.”

  I raise a trembling hand, “Nice to meet you Mr. Hudson.”

  He takes my hand and gives it one solid shake. “Drop the mister shit. It’s meant for men of position. Just call me Allen.” He says as he let’s go of my hand.

  He walks over to a cooler picks up two beers and hands them to both of us. We take a seat at the table and I listen to them converse. Allen asks Ryder how Ol’ Bethany is doing and to tell her he said hi. Ryder changes the subject after a while, he is hurting and I want to take that away from him. I just wish I knew how.

  “So what do you do, Katrina?”

  Yep, he did it, he said my name. Obviously Ryder is the only man that I can tolerate saying my whole first name. I reign in my fear and anger by counting to five before I reply. This is his father and I don’t need him to see that side of me.

  “Allen, you asked me to call you by your first name, could you please call me Kat?” I am hoping he will think I am being friendly a
nd go with it.

  “I think I can do that.” He tells me putting the beer to his smiling lips.

  With that I tell Ryder’s dad that I go to college as a history major. He didn’t understand my passion for history and most people don’t. He picks up the deck of cards and shuffles it before dealing us all five cards a piece. “Five card stud.”

  Standing up and walking in the house Ryder yells back, “I’ll get the can.”

  The can? I don’t have to wait long to find out. When he comes out with an old coffee can full of pennies. They tell me to count myself out 100, so I do, but as I am counting they start to explain to me how to play poker. I let them. It’s been a while since I played, but I used to sneak out twice a week and drive over to the same town I got my car, to play. It was how I made most of my money until I turned 18. I could make more money in four hours than I ever could anywhere else as a teenager.

  I lose the first few rounds, but I tell myself that I am doing it to throw them off. To be honest I think I may have lost my touch. Only for a minute. An evil laugh resonates in my head when I start winning, so much so that it is almost impossible to keep it from literally coming out. The expressions coming from them when I take their pennies is hilarious. They just didn’t see it coming.

  “I do believe we have been hustled, son. You’ve caught yourself a card shark.” Allen laughs.

  “I see that.” Ryder replies picking up his new cards.

  “Just a hobby I picked up.” I tell them with a snicker.

  We play till I take all 200 copper coins from them, then I excuse myself to the restroom.

  “Just down the hall to your right.” Allen speaks up giving me directions.

  I take my time on the way there, strolling through the hallway scanning over all the pictures of Ryder and Dave growing up. It’s funny how opposite they have always looked. Ryder only took his father’s eyes, Dave got the rest of Allen’s looks. As I keep going I run up on a picture of the family when Ryder was just a baby. He was in the arms of a stunning woman. Almost black hair hung straight to her shoulders, and a smile that I can imagine lit up any room she was in. I keep scanning the portraits of Ryder’s life until I make it to the bathroom.

  When I finish and head out I hear Allen talking to Ryder in the living room. I know I shouldn’t eavesdrop but I don’t want to interrupt their and then their conversation turns to me. “This girl is different for you isn’t she?”

  “How do you figure that, dad?” Ryder asks him curiously.

  “Two reasons. The first being that you brought her here to meet your drunken dad. That means you care for her. Lastly, since you care for her things have gotten serious and you haven’t left her yet.” He pauses, then continues, “Do you deny that you care for Kat?”

  My heart stops, my breathing is coming in quick burst. What will he say? Do I want to know? Could I even handle knowing either way? None of my relationships have ever made it to the whole warm and fuzzy stage. Just a few dates, maybe sex, and then they realize they can’t handle me and leave.

  “You’re right she is different and yeah I care for her, a lot. Hell, I think I might be...”

  Ryder doesn’t have the chance to finish whatever he was about to say. He wasn’t going to say…nope he wasn’t. Rushing into the room, my hand hits the wall because I come around the corner so fast, and a string of curse words come out of my mouth.

  “That’s my kind of, gal!” Allen says patting Ryder on the back. “Go ahead and get the lady home. And son, make sure the next time you come over you bring her with you.” Sending him a wink, Allen comes up and gives me a hug. “I would love the opportunity to lose against this one in poker, again.”

  When we get to the car Ryder stops me before I open the door. “How is your hand?” He picks it up gently and examines it.

  “It’s fine.”

  My word isn’t good enough as he continues looking it over and running his fingers over the slight red mark across the top. I wince, and it’s enough for him to notice. “If it was fine, that wouldn’t have hurt you.”

  “It’s tender. No big deal, I promise.” Shock registers on my face.

  “I must be wearing off on you, because I am pretty sure you told me you don’t like making promises.” Ryder comments.

  “Maybe it’s a good thing that you are wearing off on me.” I retort.

  “Never said it wasn’t.”

  ***

  We decide to stop at a drive through on the way home to get something into our bellies. While we eat Ryder ask me where I learnt to play poker like I do, and I tell him. I leave out the part about having to get out of my house, and that I did it because I needed the money. He just laughs at me and tells me that I threw him and his dad a curve ball knowing how to play that well.

  We make it to my house and find Dave’s truck is in the driveway. Opening the door we find the girls just heading out with Rhett, Dave and Cole following behind them. They stop long enough for me to tell Lexi and Skeigh about ‘meeting the dad’, and they get a kick out of it. When they ask if we want to go out with them, I am just about to tell them sure, but Ryder speaks up first.

  “Next time. I’m pretty tired.” His arm comes around my waist, “If it’s ok with Kat, I figured we would just stay in.”

  I take my eyes off my retreating friends and turn to Ryder, “I’m good with that.”

  Once the door closes leaving us alone. Ryder is all over me before I have the chance to blink. At some point I end up with my ass on the counter, in just my bra and panties. Ryder is down to his jeans and socks, and what a site to behold. Jeans low on his hips, extenuating that line of dark hair that starts at his belly button and disappears below the waistband of his boxers. He starts pulling the straps of my bra down, but I grab his biceps and hold him at arm’s length.

  “Let’s take this to my room. You never know, they could come back. Personally, I don’t want them walk in on us.” I hop off the counter and pick up the clothes off the floor. Handing them to Ryder I say, “Go ahead, I’m going to me a glass of water. I’ll be right behind you.”

  He kisses the top of my head before going towards my door. I watch him go, simply because I can’t help myself. I turn the faucet on and stick the glass under the stream. I lean back against the counter and take a few gulps till the cup is empty, then refill it so I can get in my room to Ryder. That’s when it dawns on me. I left with him earlier and left everything from that file covering my bed. Oh, shit!

  Chapter 15

  Dropping the cup in the sink I take off down the hall and throw open my bedroom door. Ryder is standing at the side of my bed, papers in his hand. I am frozen stiff in the doorway. How much has he read? I jump into action and start picking up the papers and stuffing them back in the folder, but when I go to snatch the papers out of Ryder’s hand he explodes.

  “What the hell is this shit, Kat?” He demands, holding the papers up.

  “It’s nothing. Just give it to me, please.”

  He takes the folder from my hands and pours the papers I had already picked up, back on the bed. “This…this stuff is far from nothing.” He scatters them around till he finds the paper he was looking for and puts it in my face. It is what Victoria has on the article so far. “Who is this person talking about? Is this you?”

  “Just drop it, Ryder.” Please, just let this go.

  “Hell, no I won’t drop it!” He roars, throwing everything in his hands to the floor and taking a step towards me. “Answer me. Is this you these people are all talking about? All this shit. Is it you it’s about?” I don’t move, or reply. Hell, I am not sure if I am breathing. “Is this you?”

  “Yes.” I manage to croak out. Ryder crooks his finger under my chin, forcing me to look at him.

  “Are these stories just that, stories? Or are they real life?” His face mask any emotion he is feeling. I can’t tell if that adds to the anger that his question just evoked from me, or not. Is he seriously asking if what he was reading was true? Does he not believe
it happened like the ones in the interviews? Fury, rage, and hurt simmer to the surface. I try and hold them back but it’s not use, I explode.

  “What do you want to hear Ryder? Are you sure you want the truth? Can you take it? Because when I came out and told the truth before, no one else could. No one, not even my mother could handle when I told her that her husband, the man that had raised me since I was a baby, was molesting me! The man that on paper was my father, seeing as he adopted me after he married my mother. Not a single person in my town, cousins, aunts and uncles, friends, not even my grandparents could believe that their precious deacon of the church could do such a thing.

  “I didn’t have one person who believed me, not a single person I could turn to. I became the town nut, the liar. The girl who would make up something that crazy, just to get some attention.” Tears are running down my face in streams at this point. I look at the blur that is Ryder from my tears, but I keep going. “I was five when he started. Five, when he made me do things to him. A year later he progressed on to touching me. I was ten when I had enough and finally told. Ten when I lost everyone close to me.

  “My mother was always working. Being a caretaker she had crazy hours. She was mostly gone at night so the family could get some rest, while she watched over whomever. As she was next to someone else’s bedside tending to them, he would be at mine. He would come in my room shutting the door behind him leaving nothing but him, me, and the darkness. Once the door would click close he would say my name as he got closer.” I bow my head to my chest and walk over to the window. I let out a sarcastic laugh and look over my shoulder, “Hell up until you, no man has been able to call me Katrina. When I left I changed my last name because it was his. I didn’t want anything that belonged to him, but Katrina, that’s my name. He took everything from me, but that.”

  I drop to the floor and pull my knees to my chest. Wrapping my arms around them, I rock back and forth slowly as I cry. I don’t know how long I am there before I feel Ryder sit behind me and try to pull me to him. I fight him for a while because he didn’t want to believe either. In the end I am too weak and fall into him. He doesn’t say anything, just lets me cry. Just like in my dream, he brings the light into my darkness.