Because of You

by Maria E. Monteiro

  Austin turns and faces me. “I’m so sorry. If I would’ve known my dad was going to be his asshole self I wouldn’t have invited you over.”

  “It’s okay.”

  “No it’s not! He shouldn’t have said those things in front of you. He just wants me to live the life he thinks is right for me. He wants me to go to the school he picks. He wants me to pick my career. He wants me to do everything he wants, and I have for a long time. But now I’m tired of his shit.” He shakes his head in frustration. “He really shouldn’t have said those things in front of you. I’m so sorry.”

  I grab his hand. “It really is okay.” I put a smile on my face. “Besides, I like knowing I’m the girl that’s ruining your life.”

  He begins to laugh. I love hearing his laughter and knowing I’m the reason. “How did I get so lucky? You really do make everything better.” He brings my hand to his lips.

  “I feel the same way. I do make everything better,” I tease, making him laugh harder.

  “Oh God, I love you.”

  I pull away and quickly begin to replay his words in my head. Did he really just say he loves me? Or did he just blurt that out by mistake. “What?”

  He looks at me with a beautiful smile. His warm hand touches my face. “I was a fool the day when you said you loved me. I should have told you right away that I love you too, because I do and have for a long time.”

  “You have?” I swallow.

  “I have. I love you,” he whispers and then brings his lips to mine. My heart pounces against my chest. He loves me too. Austin Evans loves me!

  “I love you too,” I say with my lips still glued to his.

  Austin confessing he loves me pretty much has made everything that happened at his house worth it. I haven’t seen his parents since that day, nor do I want to see them. They don’t like me and I don’t really care for them.

  “Hey,” Farrah says, joining me at my locker.

  “Hey. What’s going on?”

  “Nothing. Just dealing with having to see Josh and Julia together. They make me sick.”

  “I’m sorry. You deserve better than Josh.”

  “Yes I do!” she sings. “Anyway, enough about that asshole. So how was your weekend?”

  “Nothing really exciting. Austin just told me he loved me.”

  Farrah stops and turns around to face me with her honey brown eyes open wide. “What?!”

  “Austin told me he loved me.” If it were possible to make my smile any wider it would be ten feet long.

  “Ohmigod! When? How? Tell me everything.”

  I quickly fill her in.

  “Ohmigod Jade, I’m so happy for you. His parents suck, but I’m so happy for you.” She gives me a tight hug. “So what’s he gonna do?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Is he gonna go North State next year? Or is he still planning on going to UT?”

  I don’t answer her. It was hard enough dealing with it when we were first starting to date, but now that he told me he loves me it’s become twice as hard. There’s this big part of me that’s secretly wishing he does pick North State. I know I’m being selfish, but I can’t help it.

  We turn the corner and my heart falls when I spot Logan leaning against his locker laughing over something with Garret. I want turn and run. I can’t deal with his attitude right now

  He looks at me and surprisingly gives me an apologetic smile. He excuses himself from Garret and begins to saunter over to us.

  “He wants to talk to you,” Farrah whispers in my ear.

  “About what?” I ask her furrowing my eyebrow.

  “You’ll see. Don’t worry I already warned him he can’t say anything mean to you. I need my friends to make up already.” She turns around and walks away.

  “Hey,” he says, putting his hands in his pockets and shrinking into his grey hoody. “Do you think we can talk?”

  “Sure.” I follow him outside so scared he’s going to break my heart again.

  “How you’ve been?”

  “Okay. How about you?”

  “Good.” He shrinks further into his hoody. “No, I’m lying. Farrah said I should be honest with you. So here it is, I really hate fighting with you. I’m really sorry for acting like a dick lately. I guess I still wasn’t over the whole Olivia thing and you were right. It wasn’t Austin’s fault about what happened with us. I was so mad I couldn’t see that. Worst of all I let that anger ruin our friendship. I’m really sorry. You think you can ever forgive me?”

  “I really hate fighting with you too. And I want to say yes, but you have to understand Austin is part of my life. I’m not saying you have forgive him or even accept him, but you can’t say the things you’ve been saying or treating me like I don’t count when he’s around. I can’t continue our friendship if you’re gonna treat me like you hate me all the time.”

  “I know I’m been a huge douchebag to you. It just pissed me off every time I saw you guys together. I felt like I was getting cheated on all over again. But I promise you I won’t be an ass to you anymore. If you want to be with Austin that’s your business and I will respect it for real this time. I love you Jade. You’re one of my very best friends. I don’t wanna lose you. Even if I have to be nice to Austin.” He makes air quotes in the air as he says Austin’s name. I can’t help but laugh. I really do miss him.

  “So, what do you say? Are we friends again?” he asks cocking his head to the side.

  I don’t even bother answering I run right into his arms. It’s like all the stars are a lining and things in my life are actually working out.

  Now that football is over Austin and I hang out a lot more. Even though he isn’t allowed to come over when my mom is not home, he’s here all the time. I just make sure he’s gone before seven, which is usually the time she comes home.

  “What are you doing this weekend?” Austin asks stroking my hair, as I lay my head on his warm chest watching the movie Casablanca. I see why he loves these old movies.

  “Nothing. I was supposed to stay at my dad’s but he’s going to Iowa to visit Trisha’s family. So I’m here again this weekend.” Which is perfect for me. I love sleeping only feet away from him. I pop my head up and raise my eyebrows. “Why? You wanna do something?”

  “Well actually I’m going to visit my brother at school. I figured I’d visit him and get my interview with them out of the way.”

  “So you’re still applying to Braden?”

  “Yeah. I don’t wanna go there or anything. I don’t wanna have to live in my brother’s shadow for another four years.”

  “Then why do the interview?”

  “I’m just using it as an excuse. I wanna get away this weekend.”

  “Oh,” I utter, starting to already miss him.

  “I was wondering if you’d like to go with me?”

  I sit up to look at him. “Really?”

  “Yeah. We’d leave Saturday morning and be back Sunday afternoon.”

  “Where would we stay?” I can’t believe he’s asking me to go away with him. I would love to spend the weekend with him and not have to say goodbye.

  “My brother lives in apartment near the campus. He’ll let us stay there. He won’t mind. He’ll stay at the frat house. It’ll be nice to be able to spend the night together without anyone interrupting us.” I know exactly what he means.

  Every time we have been together and so close to taking our relationship to the next step something happens to ruin it. I’m not sure if I’m ready to do this, but there’s no way I’m going to miss out on going away with him.

  “Have you stayed there before?” I ask.

  “Yeah, a couple of times.”

  Wait, he’s been there a couple of times? Suspicions begin to swim up to my brain and I immediately wonder who else he’s taken there. I give him a warily look. “Have you taken a lot of girls to your brother’s apartment?”

  “What?” He laughs, “Noooo.”

  “Yeah right.” I hit his chest.<
br />
  “I swear you’re the first girl I’m taking there, and the only girl I ever want to take there.”

  The doubt digging a whole in my head fills it self up and escapes my body. I lean over a kiss him.

  “Does this mean you wanna go?”

  “Of course! I’ll ask my mom if I could stay at Farrah’s this weekend. I’m sure she’ll be okay with that.”

  “Perfect. I can’t wait to spend the night with the girl I love.” He pulls me in closer and begins to kiss me.

  I can’t wait either.

  As I expected my mother is okay with me staying at Farrah’s house for the weekend. I know she is not going to call to check on me. I’ve stayed at Farrah’s house so many times before and she’s never once called.

  Besides she has two different weddings this weekend, I know she’ll be extremely busy. I’m also sure she’ll take this opportunity to have Tony sleep over. I know he’s been staying here every time I stay at my father’s. The thought of my mother having sex makes me sick. I’m just happy she’s doing it when I’m not around.

  Anyway, the plan is to go to Farrah’s house Saturday morning and wait for Austin to come pick me up. We are hoping to be on the road by nine in the morning, and come back Sunday by five. It’s all going to be perfect.

  “Now tell me again why you ‘re heading to Farrah’s house so early? My mom asks entering my room as I pack the last of my things in a duffle bag. Besides my undergarments I’m also taking three pairs of jeans, at least five different tops, and something sexy to wear tonight. I know that’s more than I need but I like to have options.

  “I’m going with her to take her sisters to their dance class. They have to be there by nine thirty,” I quickly answer. I’m not lying about her sister’s dance class. I just didn’t say Farrah’s mom is actually taking them.

  “Oh, okay. So what else do you have planned for this weekend?”

  “Nothing really. We might go to the mall and then the movies.”

  “Are you going to see Austin?” She folds her arms under her chest.

  “No. He went to see his brother up at school.” I don’t want to lie about what Austin is doing this weekend, just in case she talks to his parents.

  “I’m glad you’re spending sometime apart. It’s not healthy to spend all your time with each other.”

  “Mom! Please don’t start.”

  “Fine. Well I’m off to work. I can’t wait for both of these weddings to be over. I don’t know which one of these brides is worse. They are driving me crazy.”

  “Are they worse than Carrie?”

  “No one is worse than Carrie. She’s going to make me want to quit the business. Anyway, I’ll be out all day, but if you need me you can call my cell phone or my assistant.”

  “No problem.”

  “Do you want me to drive you to Farrah’s on way to work.”

  “Okay. Thanks Mom. I love you,” I add to make her smile, which she does and then gives me a tight hug.

  I hate lying to her. I wish I could tell her the truth, but I know there’s no way in hell she would give me permission to go.

  Austin arrives only minutes after my mom drops me off. He jumps out of his car and grabs my bag out of hand while giving me a soft warm kiss hello.

  “Are you ready?” he asks me with a big bright smile.

  “Yes.”

  “I’ve been looking forward to this weekend all week long. I can’t wait to be alone with you.”

  “Me too.” I lean forward and begin to kiss him.

  “Okay, you two. You’re making the single people here jealous,” Farrah says clapping her hands together. “You guys better get going before my mother or one of me bratty brothers shows up and spoils your whole plan.”

  “She’s right,” I say, pulling away from Austin. “Farrah, thank you so much for doing this.”

  “No problem. Have a great time. And remember to be safe.” She takes my hand and shoves a condom in it. I can’t help but laugh tucking it in my front pocket.

  “I will. If anything comes up just call me.”

  “No problem. Now, will you two go already!” I give her a huge hug. She’s the best. I owe her big time for this.

  I jump into Austin’s car and before I know it we are on the highway heading towards Braden University.

  28

  Braden University

  The three-hour drive is not as long as I thought it was going to be. We have an awesome time talking and singing at the top of our lungs. I love how easy it is to be myself with him. I don’t ever worry if I being a dork, because I know he loves me for me. It’s the best.

  Our plan was to stop at Blake’s place first, but by the time we enter the town of Pine Wood it’s already past twelve. Austin’s appointment is at twelve thirty so we decide to go directly to Braden University.

  Austin parks his car and we run to the administration building. I decide to stay outside while he goes inside. The brisk December air smoothly hits my skin as I begin to walk around.

  Braden University is beautiful with all its old brick buildings and the grounds around the school are breathtaking. The whole school is getting ready for the holidays so every tree is decorated with white Christmas lights. If there were snow on the ground this would be a perfect winter wonderland. I really wouldn’t mind going to school here. Just being here makes me excited to go to college.

  I kind of wish Austin would chose this school if he’s not going to go to North State, but he already has his heart set on UT. Why can’t things be different? Once again that big timer appears above my head. I’m not sure I’ll able to survive with him living across the country. At the same time I’m not sure I’ll be able to survive if he doesn’t follow his dream.

  Damn it! Why can’t his dream school be North State?

  Austin walks out with a huge smile on his face. “How did it go?” I ask, meeting him on the steps.

  “Amazing. They basically said I’m a shoe-in if I wanna go here.”

  “Do you think you might want to?”

  “No,” he laughs. “This is Blake’s school and he can keep it.”

  “Oh.” I can feel my face fall. “Do you have to take a tour now or anything?”

  “Nah, I told them my brother would show me around. They were cool about it. Are you hungry?”

  “Starving.”

  “Good. Lets go get something to eat.” He grabs my hand and leads me back to the car.

  “What about your brother? Don’t we have to check in with him?”

  “Nah. I already texted him and told him I’m in town. He said he left the key under the mat for us.”

  “You mean he’s not home?”

  “No. I told you he’s staying at his frat house.”

  My cheeks turn red realizing Blake knows what’s going to be happening in his apartment tonight. “Are we gonna see him at all this weekend?”

  “Yeah, he told me to bring you to the party tonight. I mean that’s if you wanna go.”

  “Of course I wanna go. It’s gonna be my first college party,” I say getting excited.

  He pulls me in putting both his arms around my shoulders blocking the brisk air from reaching my body. “You see this is why I love you. We both think alike.”

  Maybe it’s because I’ve watched National Lampoon’s Animal House one too many times with my dad that I expected to see everyone in toga’s shaking their bodies on the floor while the band plays, A Little Bit Louder. Instead what I find is party a lot like the ones at Derek’s house.

  “Do you want a drink?” Austin screams over the loud music.

  “Yeah.”

  I follow him into the kitchen where the kegs are and the music is not as loud. We are half way in when someone jumps in front of us making us leap back. “It’s about time you got here,” Blake says.

  He gives Austin a brotherly hug and then looks over at me with his dark brown eyes making my nerves shift. Blake has always had this affect on me, even when I was a kid I would get tongue-tie
d around him.

  His broad cheekbones rise as his lips spreads into a sexy smile. “Will you look at little Ms. Jade. You’re all grown up and looking pretty fine.” He wraps his big arms around me and gives me a tight hug. I can’t believe he’s hugging me. I always thought he couldn’t stand me.

  “Let go of my girl,” Austin demands, pulling him off me and then draping his arms around my shoulders.

  “I was just saying hello,” Blake teases him. “So how did the interview go?”

  “Real good.”

  “Austin!” A bunch of nameless guys approach us. Each one of them wearing a T-shirt with the logo from the store they bought it from. “Your brother told us you were coming.”

  “How are you guys?” Austin says bringing me in tighter under his arm. It’s cute how protective he is.

  Before I know it I’m being introduced to all them. Tom, John, Fred, Chris, and Wayne. Blake says their names so fast I don’t know whose face belongs to which name. Farrah would love it here. She wouldn’t know who to flirt with first.

  “So are we gonna have the honor of your presence here next year?” the guy with the strong jawline asks Austin.

  “Not a chance,” Austin laughs. I can’t stand how fast he dismisses the idea of coming here.

  “Our little Austin is going to Texas. He wants to go to UT like our father did,” Blake explains to his frat brothers. “It’s been his dream school since he was little. I swear his first word was longhorn. He even tried talking with southern accent for a whole year when he was younger.”

  I start laughing. I remember that so well. He would use the words y’all and reckon in almost every sentences. He was so cute.

  The guys start to laugh too as Austin turns fifty shades of red. He’s even cuter when he’s embarrassed.

  “Yo Austin, I just have to warn you Michelle’s here,” the guy with the red baseball cap says, making all of the laughter stop just as the sound of the music becomes lower. Who’s Michelle? And why does he have to be warned about her?

  “Kay, thanks,” Austin says losing all the color on his face.