She's Far From Hollywood

by Jo McNally

  “Shhh, baby. It’s just a dream. I’m okay. Shhhh...”

  Her body stilled, then she took a deep breath and settled against him in a peaceful sleep once again. His fingers continued to trace up and down her back. She’d thought she was going to watch him shoot himself right in front of her.

  She deserved better than a man like him. His arm tightened around her instinctively. That might be true, but he couldn’t let her go yet. She was the anchor holding him to shore. There was another emotion swirling through him that he refused to acknowledge. It was an emotion he didn’t dare confront, because it frightened him more than anything he’d ever experienced on this earth, and that was saying something. He rested his chin on her head and closed his eyes, refusing to acknowledge the warmth in his chest and the peace in his mind, all because of this woman.

  They woke together when Maggie gave a soft whine, signaling her need to leave the truck. The sun was up, and Cole guessed it was near seven in the morning. Bree stretched and yawned. She looked at him, and his breath left him momentarily. Her multicolored hair was a wild tangle around her face, and her green eyes were dark and full of emotion. She tried to smile, but couldn’t quite get there. Was she remembering her nightmare? Or thinking about the reality of what happened on the banks of the swimming hole?

  They stared at each other in silence, then she leaned forward and kissed him softly on the lips. She never blinked, and he finally had to close his eyes just to protect himself from the intensity of her gaze. She rubbed her hands against his chest before sliding them down his belly. In an instant, his body reacted and the kiss went from innocent to sensual. His fingers dug into her upper arms and his breath hitched.

  But he pulled away, breaking the moment.

  “There’s nothing I’d rather do than make love to you on the seat of this truck, Brianna, but we have enough explaining to do as it is. We have to go face the music.”

  “You talked to Ty?”

  He nodded. “Last night. Apparently I have a houseful of ticked-off family and friends that I...we need to deal with. Besides—” he stretched and reached across her to open the door for Maggie “—a cup of coffee sounds really good to me right now.”

  “We still need to talk.”

  “I think we have enough talking coming up in the next few hours to cover every detail and answer every question.”

  He knew they had to discuss what was going to come next for them as a couple. But not today. Today he just wanted to deal with calming everyone down, and then he was going to get rid of them all and take Bree to his bedroom, where he’d bury his worries by burying himself in her.

  * * *

  BREE WAS TUCKED tightly under Cole’s arm while he drove across the fields. She was still wrapped in his blanket, since her sundress was a wrinkled, shrunken and nearly transparent mess after getting soaked last night. She reached up and wove her fingers through his where his hand rested on her shoulder, feeling the tension radiating from his body. His fingers tightened on hers as the house came into view, surrounded by vehicles.

  Ty’s truck was there along with Tammy’s SUV. The Jeep was there, so Chris and Jerome had stayed the night. Arlen’s blue truck was parked beside the barn, and he was walking toward the house. He stopped and turned when he heard them coming then called out something, probably announcing their arrival. As Cole pulled up behind the house, people started pouring out the back door.

  She glanced up at Cole. “I guess heading on down to the road and driving away is out of the question?”

  Cole grunted. “Don’t think it didn’t cross my mind. But we’ll have to face them sooner or later.” He turned and put his hands on either side of her face, staring hard into her eyes. “I need to know you’re with me, Bree. I frightened you last night, and I’m sorry. Tell me you’re not going to walk away. Not yet.”

  Her heart clenched at the last two words. Not yet. He still expected her to go eventually, and of course, he was right. She had to go back to Hollywood. Her life, such as it was, was waiting for her there.

  But not yet.

  “It’ll take more than a dunk in dark water to chase me away.”

  His expression remained solemn as he leaned forward and kissed her lips softly.

  “I don’t want to chase you anywhere but into my bed, but first...”

  They looked out the windshield at the people waiting for them to emerge. The only smiling face was Nell’s. Everyone else looked tired and worried. Ty was the first to grab Cole and embrace him when they left the truck. Tears welled in her eyes as the two brothers stood silent for a long moment, eyes closed, just holding each other in a bear hug. Finally Ty clapped Cole on the back a couple of times and they stepped apart. Awkward handshakes and manly embraces were exchanged with Arlen, Chris and Jerome. The men all looked into Cole’s eyes as if assessing his well-being.

  “Girl, you look like you spent the night sleeping in a truck.” Nell laughed as she reached up to tame Bree’s wild hair.

  Emily’s eyes were wide. “Miss Bree, are you naked?”

  The men had been in quiet conversation, but all talking stopped at the girl’s question. Bree blushed. The blanket covered the short dress completely, so it probably did look like she was standing there in the farmyard with nothing on. She let the blanket slip off her shoulder, revealing the strap of her sundress.

  “No, I’m not naked, Emily.” She straightened and met the men’s eyes. “And I didn’t get naked, either, so just erase that thought from your heads.”

  Cole gave her that crooked grin that always made her pulse jump.

  “Nope. I’m not gonna erase that thought, sweetheart.” He looked sternly at the other guys. “But you are all going to do what the lady said, right?” They nodded in agreement.

  The light moment seemed to alleviate some of the stressful undercurrent, and they headed inside the house, where Nell had her famous baked breakfast strata cooling on the counter. Bree excused herself briefly to run upstairs, shower and change into jeans and a T-shirt. When she returned, they filled their plates and sat at the table, talking about the weather and crops and baseball. It was an intentionally neutral conversation. This was their way of allowing Cole and Bree to feel welcomed and accepted without judgment. She loved them all for that.

  The realization made her sit straighter. She did love them. She loved Nell, with her flour-dusted apron still on, and her sweet, knowing smile. She loved Tammy and Emily, wearing matching Miranda Lambert T-shirts. She loved Arlen. He and his dad were hardworking men who may not say a lot of flowery words, but they stood by their friends unflinchingly. She loved Chris and Jerome, eating with gusto and nudging each other in the good-natured camaraderie born on the battlefield. And Ty, at his brother’s side, murmuring a soft word occasionally, shoulder to shoulder, making sure Cole knew he was there. Her feelings for these people overwhelmed her.

  Cole looked up and met her eyes. For just a moment she could see herself sitting at this same table ten years from now, with the same friends, exchanging the same intimate glance with Cole. The vision startled her so much she dropped her fork. Everyone laughed, but Bree felt panic pulsing through her veins.

  Her heart was growing roots here, and that wasn’t smart. Her home was a Malibu beach house. Whether they caught the stalker or not, she needed to get back to that world before she lost herself in the Carolinas. Or was she finding herself at long last? Cole was still staring at her, as if he could read the panic in her eyes. He leaned forward, but before he could speak, Nell started gathering up plates and shooing the women into the kitchen. Ty grabbed Cole’s arm and pulled him out to the side porch, followed by Chris, Jerome and Arlen.

  Nell’s hand rested on Bree’s shoulder. “The boys need to talk, honey. He scared us all. And you, taking off without telling anyone where you were—what were you thinking, girl?”

  Bree grabbed a di
sh towel and took a plate from Tammy at the sink. “I was only thinking of getting to Cole as fast as I could. I’m sorry I made you worry.”

  Her thoughts kept wandering back to Malibu and her so-called life there. If she vanished overnight, would anyone notice? Would she come home to a houseful of worried friends and family? She shook her head. She already knew the answer. She’d been gone for weeks and no one other than the paparazzi seemed to care. On impulse, she pulled Emily into a hug, and the girl responded by wrapping her arms around Bree’s waist.

  “I really do love you, Miss Bree.” The words made Bree close her eyes tightly, and she whispered her answer.

  “Guess what, Emily? I really love you, too.”

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  JEROME AND CHRIS sat in the wicker chairs on the porch, quietly waiting for The Conversation to begin. Arlen leaned up against the railing and lit a cigarette. Ty paced back and forth, running his fingers through his hair and muttering to himself. Cole braced himself for the rare appearance of his older brother’s temper, because Ty was definitely getting ready to blow.

  He slapped his hand hard against the porch column and spun to face Cole. “What the hell were you thinking? You take off and don’t tell anyone a damned thing and leave us all scared shitless. We didn’t know where you were, and we didn’t know what you were going to do. Did you think about anyone other than yourself, you stupid, selfish jackass?”

  Cole couldn’t remember his brother ever stringing together that many curse words in one outburst. He didn’t know if he should laugh or apologize. Before he could decide how to react, Ty poked him in the chest with his finger. “Talk to me right now, brother, and make it good.”

  Cole’s temper flared, but cooled quickly when he looked into Ty’s eyes. He saw the same fear Bree had shown last night. Guilt stabbed at him, and he dropped his head.

  “I’m sorry, all right? I’m not going to keep repeating it, but you have to believe me. I’m sorry. I had a hard time of it. I took the news about Travis...” He sucked in a breath after speaking his friend’s name. Travis was gone. The knowledge felt like a weight on his shoulders that couldn’t be shifted. “I took the news badly. I sort of...lost it. I thought I needed to be alone, but that was a bad idea. I kept thinking about what happened. Why it happened.”

  “You took Pop’s shotgun.”

  “I did.”

  “Where is it now?”

  “At the bottom of the creek.”

  A heavy silence fell on the porch as they processed that information. Chris spoke first.

  “You did more than scare us, didn’t you, Cole? You scared yourself, too.”

  He wasn’t a man who blushed, but he could feel redness heat his cheeks at the memory of resting his head on the shotgun barrel. It was a stupid, reckless thing to do, even if the gun was unloaded.

  “She saved me.” He didn’t realize he’d said the words out loud until he saw the worried look on Ty’s face.

  “She’s leaving, Cole. They’re closing in on the stalker. Caroline called Nell last night and said they hope to have an arrest soon. Bree will be going home...”

  “No. I need her here.”

  Chris, Jerome and Arlen exchanged worried glances, but Ty’s expression was pure frustration.

  “Really, Cole? You need her. Really?” Ty’s hands lifted in disbelief. “What you need is professional help. If nothing else, Travis just proved that going it alone is not an option.”

  “I’m not alone. She can save me. I just need her to stay.” Even as he said the words, he knew how unrealistic they sounded. He ignored the niggling doubts, but Ty didn’t.

  “You need her.” Ty shook his head. “Do you need her the same way you needed alcohol after your first tour? I seem to recall you telling me you ‘needed’ the escape the whiskey provided. We almost lost you to the booze back then, and you know it. Or maybe you need Bree the same way you needed to party every night with girls like Amber after you got back from your second tour? You knew damned well she was running around on you, and you still proposed, because you needed her.”

  He winced at the truth of those words. He didn’t want to hear any more. He stepped forward, daring Ty to continue, but his brother didn’t blink, even when their chests were nearly touching.

  “I helped you pick out a diamond ring for Amber, because you needed her so much and I just wanted you to be okay. Or maybe you need Bree the same way you needed Maggie after your last tour. You told me everything would be fine if you could just find Scott’s dog and bring her to the farm. I didn’t question it. I tracked her down in Memphis and we paid that police department thousands of dollars to replace her with another bomb-sniffing dog, all because my baby brother needed her. She was finally going to be the thing to save you, and I thought it just might work. Except Maggie couldn’t save you, could she? Because you locked her up in the truck, didn’t you?”

  Cole blinked away from Ty’s silent accusation. They both knew it was true.

  “And now you’re telling me Brianna Mathews can save you at last. And I’m supposed to believe it. The girl’s going home to Hollywood.” He paused for emphasis. “Home to Hollywood. Think about that. Damn it, I think Bree is awesome, but if you think she can save you, well...you’re just flat-out wrong. You need more help than any of us can provide, including Bree, and you damned well know it.”

  Cole looked to Chris and Jerome, hoping for some support from the guys who served. But Chris was staring hard at his feet with a frown, and Jerome was shaking his head sadly. He stood and placed his good hand on Cole’s shoulder.

  “He’s right, man,” Jerome said. “You’re not being fair to Bree. You can’t expect her to do for you what you’re not willing to do for yourself.”

  “That’s rich, Jerome, considering you’ve told me a dozen times that Pamela saved you.”

  “She did. But not in the way you’re thinking. My love for Pam forced me to be a better man, and part of that was getting the help I needed. She was my reason for finding my way, but she didn’t do it for me. She couldn’t. And neither can Bree. She’ll try. But it’ll break her.” Jerome and Cole looked through the window to where the women stood in the kitchen, all talking at once. Bree laughed at something and pulled Emily into a hug. He barely heard Arlen’s quiet words from the porch rail where he sat.

  “Remember that day you came up into the hayloft and that redhead was all jacked up and mad at you? I’m surprised the barn didn’t combust from the sparks between you two. I don’t think that happens twice in a lifetime, man. Don’t blow it. Listen to these guys.”

  Inside the house, Bree turned and met his eyes. She smiled reassuringly, apparently seeing his uncertainty. It was no surprise, since he’d long ago realized she could see into his soul. And just like that, he was no longer uncertain. He walked away from the men, tossing a last comment over his shoulder to his brother.

  “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine.”

  Ty kicked a chair across the porch and spat out another string of curse words behind him. Bree met Cole halfway across the living room, wrapping her arms around his waist. He hadn’t told her as much, but she had to know how much he needed her. He dropped his head to her shoulder and breathed in her scent as if it was pure oxygen. She shivered as he ran his nose up her neck to her ear.

  “Make everyone go away,” he whispered. She squeezed him tight for just a second and nodded. Stepping back, she looked to Nell.

  “Cole and I both need to get some rest. Do you think...?”

  Nell smiled. “Say no more.” The older woman turned to Tammy and Emily and caught the attention of the men watching through the open door. “Breakfast is over, folks, and we’ve all seen that Cole and Bree are safe. So let’s give them a chance to relax, shall we?”

  Ty started to object, but Tammy shook her head sharply and he closed his mouth,
satisfying himself with a final glare in Cole’s direction before turning away. Jerome pulled Bree into a bear hug while Chris tugged Cole aside.

  “I can’t say much, Cole, because you know how far down I’ve been. Further than you, and longer. But I can tell you this much.” His bright blue eyes met Cole’s head-on. “I didn’t get out of it alone, and neither will you. And I’m not talking about civilian help. I’m talking trained professionals.” His eyes flicked to Bree and Jerome. “Remember how much you hated having greenies join our crew? Those new kids fresh from basic that didn’t know what the hell they were doing? Great guys, eager and willing, but clueless, right?”

  Cole nodded. He remembered the wide-eyed recruits that would arrive in Afghanistan.

  Chris gave him a crooked grin. “What did you used to call it when they showed up?”

  “I called it amateur hour.”

  Chris nodded. “Exactly. They meant well, but their lack of know-how put us all at risk. Look at her.” Bree was smiling at something Jerome was saying. “She wants to help, but she’s an amateur. You need more than an amateur right now, brother. You need trained professionals walking you through this battle.”

  Cole shook his head, wanting to deny his friend’s words, but they both knew Chris was right.

  Nell was the last to leave. She gave Cole a long, serious look.

  “You’ve got a reason now to get through this. Use it.”

  Bree looked confused, but Cole knew exactly what Nell was trying to say. It was the same thing everyone else was trying to beat into his head. He just wasn’t ready to accept it, not even from Nell. He tugged Bree close and held on to her, never breaking eye contact with his neighbor.

  Nell laughed out loud and turned away.

  “Oh, you are one stubborn Southern boy. But underneath all that stubbornness is a smart man. You’ll figure it out sooner or later.”