Behind the Lens (Boys of Fallout Book 2)

by Cassandra Giovanni

  “I’m not either,” I reply, and I watch as Brent’s brow furrows over his eyes. His biceps bulge as he holds himself over me. “I’m a hypocrite. I left Jace because he cheated, and he was drunk half the time… I had a hard time dealing with what he did. One night I got so wasted I ended up in the hospital. I shouldn’t have judged you for getting high.”

  “That doesn’t make you a hypocrite. It makes you human, Nat. He hurt you, and you reacted. What’s important is that you’re not like that anymore, which is more than I can say about myself, or any of the guys,” Brent replies, his eyes racing over mine. “I’m never going to be perfect, Nat. Sometimes the road is going to get to me…”

  “And I expect you to call me when it does, and not smoke or drink whatever your fans hand you to try to make it better. It won’t make it better,” I say, and my jaw clenches as I wait for Brent to respond.

  He smiles and kisses my forehead. “I promise.”

  “Thank you,” I reply, leaning up to kiss him.

  Brent eases his body over mine, and I run my hands over his muscled shoulders down to the elastic of his pants. His mouth drops to my collarbone, nipping it as I push the material down. Brent’s lips trail down my bare skin as his hands relieve my body of the rest of the material separating us, and my back arches as he whispers my name.

  Chapter 31

  The final month of the tour flies by, and just like James said, the video for Saving You for Last goes viral. They’ve been playing it every night at shows, and the crowd always goes crazy. Tonight, they’ve decided to end their encore with it. I stand on the opposite side of the stage as the crowd screams for Makeshift Chemistry to come back for one more. Brent makes his way up the stairs, and his eyes meet mine, causing my body flush. I can’t run away from the way he makes me feel. The scariest part is, I don’t think I’ll ever want to. He gives me one of those smiles I’m addicted to, and I somehow manage to remember I’m a photographer and snap the shot. He chuckles to himself as he turns to face the crowd, bringing the microphone up to his lips; the lips that traced my skin secretly only hours before. The guys don’t seem to have noticed how much time Brent and I are spending together alone, or they’re ignoring it. Either way, Brent has managed to seep into every fiber of my being, and for the first time in a long time, I feel like me. Jace can’t hold anything over my head anymore.

  My cell phone beeps in my pocket, and I pull it out as I sneak around the other side of the stage, preparing for the guys’ last exit of the tour.

  Hayden – I don’t know what Jace is up to, but he’s flying out to Cali tonight to meet with the record label. I think it has to do with the journal. Heads up.

  My stomach hardens as I look up from my phone with my pulse rushing in my ears. I hold the camera up to my face as I snap the pictures with shaking hands. The shutter clicks, but my eyes are blurred, so I don’t know what the images look like.

  James and Brent took — or in Jace’s eyes — stole the journal while I was photographing Undertow with Aiden. I lower the camera as they come off stage and my phone beeps again, this time my email tone. It’s an email from Sky.

  I hit the open button, and my jaw drops as I stare at the words on the screen, barely comprehending them.

  Hi Nat,

  Christopher Vole, head of the label, has requested a meeting with you, James and Brent tomorrow at 3:00 PM at the label’s headquarters.

  The address follows, and I jump when Brent taps my shoulder. I turn, and his smile vanishes from his face.

  “I’m sorry,” I whisper, and he shakes his head.

  I hand him the phone and watch as his Adam’s apple rises and falls before he takes a deep breath.

  “There’s nothing he can do, Nat — those are your songs,” Brent says as he gives it back to me, but his voice shakes and I know he’s just as scared as I am.

  “You two look like someone died,” James says, clapping Brent on the back. “We’re in Cali for a few more days, and I’m getting married in two weeks! What could go wrong?”

  I squeeze my eyes shut, pulling my lower lip into my mouth.

  “Vole wants to see the three of us,” Brent replies, and James swears.

  “It gets worse,” I say, swallowing as I look at them. “Hayden texted me and said Jace is here in Cali.”

  James tips his head back and then puts his hands up. “It’s fine. We’ll be okay. There’s no proof of any wrongdoing.”

  “This is Jace Smith we’re talking about,” I reply, and my whole body trembles. “There’s no telling what he’s done.”

  Brent runs his hand over his mouth, pulling his scruff down before turning to James. “You don’t think…”

  He’s cut off by James’ cell phone ringing. He takes it out of his pocket. “It’s Amber. I should take this; she’s been texting me to call her.”

  “We should find the guys and get to the tour bus before it leaves without us,” Brent replies and James nods, answering the phone and following us.

  We find the rest of the band sitting in the back room where Brent explains what’s going on with Jace. As we make our way to the hotel James talks quietly on the phone with his fiance, and from the look on his face, she’s giving him more bad news. Everyone is quiet on as we pack our drawers. When James gets off the phone, he heads to his bunk and packs his bag with more zealous than necessary. His face is pale when he finally plops down on his bed and puts his head in his hands.

  Brent exchanges a glance with me, and I shake my head before looking down at my feet. He coughs as he stands and goes to James. They exchange hushed whispers and my stomach twists.

  “You’re what?” I hear James say, his voice coming up from a whisper in its shock. “Dating?”

  I close my eyes and lay back on my bunk. Poor timing. Brent and I start dating and Jace decides to take them down with me.

  It’s all my fault.

  I want to cry, but another part of me wants to beat the shit out of Jace. I shouldn’t have fought back. I’ve made a mess of things, and me breaking up the band isn’t a good way to start a relationship with Brent. I swallow hard and when my bed imprints I open my eyes to see James.

  “Hey,” he says, cocking his head at me. “We’ll be fine.”

  “You’re upset,” I reply as I sit up.

  He rubs his neck. “Yeah, but not because of whatever shit Jace is about to pull.”

  “But Brent and I–” I start to say.

  He cuts me off with the shake of his head and his eyebrows lift. “I don’t think it holds any water in the situation. The real issue is Amber is freaking out.”

  “Because of this?”

  “No, I didn’t tell her. It’s wedding stuff. Our photographer bailed on us, and she’s freaking out that I’m not there. I don’t know where the hell we’re going to find a wedding photographer now,” he says and his head tips back as he sighs.

  I furrow my brows at him. “You don’t know any?”

  He scoffs. “How would I know a wedding photographer?”

  Kie drops down from his bunk as the bus comes to a stop.

  “You’re almost as dull as Brent was in courting her,” Kie says as he crosses his arms and raises one eyebrow.

  “Oh!” James says, and he slowly turns to me eyes wide. “Nat?”

  I laugh. “I’ve never done a wedding, but I think I can handle you fools as groomsmen.”

  “You haven’t met the bridal party yet,” Brent replies, winking at me as he puts his backpack over his shoulder. “Or our families.”

  Chapter 32

  “It’s going to be okay,” Brent says as we sit in the waiting room of Fallout Records headquarters. He puts his hand in mine and lifts it to his lips. “I promise.”

  I chew my lip as I stare at the door that separates us from whatever is going to happen. James stands and paces. I’m pretty sure we’re all worried even though both of them keep telling me everything will be okay. The secretary calls our names, and we follow her to a conference room where a gentlema
n I don’t know sits across from another person who’s face I can’t see.

  “He’s the owner of the label,” Brent says in my ear as we walk in and the gentleman stands, giving us a firm nod and using his hand to signal us to sit down.

  My stomach rolls as I look at the person already seated in the room.

  Jace.

  My knees lock, and I jump when Brent’s hand on my back pushes me forward. I sit in the chair, putting my hands in tight fists in my lap. I can feel Jace’s eyes fall on me, but I refuse to look at him. Instead, I watch as the owner sits down and leans back in his chair. His eyes move from Jace to me, to Brent and then James before settling on his hands. The seconds it takes him to speak feel like minutes, and I wonder what he’s waiting for.

  “Bands get in feuds all the time,” he begins, spreading his hands up to the ceiling as he sits forward. “Friendly competition if you will. We encourage that, but there are some things we just cannot tolerate.”

  I sink into the chair, my throat thickening as my sight narrows on Chris, who hasn’t even bothered to introduce himself. His eyes move from his hands to Brent. I suppose that’s because everyone except me already knows him.

  “Like stealing,” he says, and cold rushes up my spine. I can’t help the visible tremble, and his eyes move to mine. “We especially won’t tolerate plagiarism.”

  I know I’m blinking rapidly with my mouth slightly open as I stare at Chris whose eyes now settle on Jace before moving back to Brent and James.

  “I understand why you stole that journal, but I suppose it’s not really stealing.” His eyes shift to me, and I realize I’m not breathing. “If it wasn’t ever really the other person’s.”

  My pulse is rushing in my ears, building pressure behind my eyes until I finally realize I need to breathe.

  Breathe, Nat.

  “I’m confused,” I manage to stutter out.

  Chris’ eyes stay on me as his hands form a steeple. “You’re a lyricist, no?”

  My chest tightens, and I find myself rubbing my face as I nod.

  “Apparently an amazing one,” he says, and my body flushes with heat. “I really enjoyed that new song — Saving You for Last. But that’s not the first song you’ve written that one of my record’s bands has used, is it?”

  I want out of that room. I don’t know what Jace has done, but I realize it isn’t going to end well for him as the Chris’ gaze drifts over. Jace shifts uneasily in his chair. That fact doesn’t bother me as much as not understanding what Jace’s sick new game is.

  “How do you know?” I ask, and my voice cracks as my nails eat into my palms.

  Jace’s voice makes me jump and my eyes land on him as he answers, “I told him.”

  I can’t help the words that pass my lips as Jace lifts his head and looks at me. “Why?”

  His blond eyelashes flutter over his green eyes as he swallows. “I figured it was about time we ended this.”

  “I need to know if any other members of the band were privy to that fact Jace stole the lyrics,” Chris says, and I have to pry my eyes off of Jace. “Natalie, do you know if anyone else from Undertow knew?”

  Hayden.

  I shake my head.

  Chris looks between James and Brent. “Do either of you know of anything Natalie doesn’t?”

  “No,” James says, speaking for both Brent and him. “We took the opportunity to get on the bus when we knew the band would be out. Nat told us what to look for.”

  I let a breath out.

  “So what do you want Natalie?” Chris asks, leaning forward with pursed lips as he waits for me to answer.

  My heart hammers against my ribcage as I shake my head. “What do you mean?”

  “Do you want us to pull Monster’s Epitaph and Grace’s Revenge?” he replies.

  My vocal chords seem to stop working as my mouth moves, but no words come out. Instead, I put my hand over my lips, closing my eyes and shaking my head.

  Chris cocks his head, brow furrowing. “You don’t want us to?”

  I glance over at Brent, who’s looking down at his hands.

  I inhale through my nose before replying, “No, I don’t want you to pull the songs.”

  “Past due royalties?” he asks.

  I shake my head again. “No.”

  Chris leans back in his chair. “What do you want?”

  “Nothing,” I reply with a shrug. “All I wanted was the journal back.”

  I feel Jace stiffen in the chair next to me as the man nods. “Jace is no longer a member of Undertow, and has been dismissed from the label permanently.”

  My head jerks to Jace, and his eyes are on his hands, rubbing up and down his tight jeans. His face displays no emotion, and I realize he already knew before we walked into the room.

  “The label still wants to give proper credit where it’s due, so we’re updating all the information for the songs going forward. We’ll still need you to sign a contract stating you don’t wish to have any past due royalties and agreeing to what they’ll be going forward for all songs, including Makeshift’s,” Chris says, and he nods over our shoulders at the secretary who’s apparently been listening in.

  “I don’t want any money for them,” I reply, shaking my head and I can feel Brent and Jace’s eyes on me.

  It was never about the money. I always loved the way Jace put music to my lyrics, even Grace’s Revenge, despite the malice that was involved in it.

  Chris’ head jerks back. “You understand how unusual that is?”

  I swallow. “I gave my lyrics to Makeshift.”

  “But you didn’t give them to Undertow,” Brent finally speaks, and I look over to see his mouth is tight.

  “I just want my name on them. That’s all I’ve ever wanted — credit,” I reply, and the erratic beating of my heart calms.

  “Not the best business plan, Nat,” Jace says, his voice deep.

  I look over at him. “I’m pretty sure this isn’t a good one either.”

  He looks up from his hands, shaking his head. “You’re telling me.”

  I turn back to Chris. “My name next to written by is all I want.”

  “Alright,” Chris replies. “We’ll get that paperwork drafted and have you sign it.”

  ~~~

  We leave the building in silence, and once outside Jace heads in a different direction.

  “Jace,” I call to his back, and my muscles stiffen as he stops walking and slowly turns to face me. “What the hell was that?”

  Jace shakes his head, his jaw clenching. “I’m done, Nat.”

  I walk forward until I’m looking up at him. “What are you playing at?”

  I expect him to spit some nasty response, but instead, his shoulders sag, and he shakes his head. “I was so angry at you.”

  “At me?” I repeat, and my body goes cold.

  His eyes are sad as they flicker over my face. “I couldn’t let go of how you just walked away. It was so easy for you. You just moved on, and I was stuck.”

  “You cheated on me, Jace,” I reply, my voice shaking.

  Jace’s chin drops to his chest, and his voice is soft as he says, “I know, and I’m sorry for that…and for everything I did because of it. I was irrational and the more you didn’t react, the more I fought to get you to. I’m just tired, Nat. I’m sick of who I am. I tried so hard to break you, but the only person I broke was myself.”

  I swallow the lump in my throat. “Why now?”

  Brent steps forward from behind me. “Yeah, Jace, why now?”

  Jace’s gaze moves from me to Brent and then back. “That video.”

  I raise an eyebrow, and Jace rubs the back of his neck. His chest rises as he inhales.

  “I guess I finally saw what I’d done, and I finally listened. You’re right, and I needed to face my demons. The only way I could do that was by telling the truth,” he says, and he shrugs.

  “You just ruined your career,” I reply, and my head jerks back and forth in disbelief. “I neve
r wanted that Jace.”

  He runs his tongue over his teeth, and his gaze becomes unfocused.

  “But that’s what I needed,” he says, and his eyes focus on me. “And your forgiveness. I’m sorry, Nat.”

  Brent scoffs, shaking his head as he puts his hands behind his neck. He points at Jace. “You believe this guy?”

  I wince, and my shoulders rise.

  Brent’s eyes widen. “Come on, Nat. It’s another one of his games.”

  “I don’t see anyone winning here,” I reply.

  Brent leans over, so he’s whispering in my ear. “He’s trying to win you over.”

  I shake my head and turn to Jace.

  “I don’t trust you, and I don’t know if you’re telling the truth — or if this is another game, but you can’t hurt me anymore, Jace,” I reply, and I look passed him as I inhale through my nose. “Even if you wanted to try. So I forgive you. It’s not worth holding a grudge, and someone once told me I needed to let go before I could truly let someone else in. I’ve let go.”

  I look over at Brent, and his eyes are on me as he shakes his head smiling. I lean up on my toes and kiss his cheek. I entwine our fingers before nodding at Jace and turning away.

  Chapter 33

  I close my eyes as I put my head on Brent’s chest. The setting sun plays over our faces as we sit on the roof of his beat up truck and he wraps his arms around me, kissing my cheek. I smile as I relax into the comfort of his arms.

  “I could get used to winter in Texas,” I say, and Brent’s chest rumbles with a chuckle.

  “Glad to hear it. So what do you think? Ready to become a wedding photographer?” he asks, and I turn my head to look up at him. He smirks at me.

  “I could barely control you guys for the posed pictures. How the hell would I manage a bunch of drunk versions of you?” I reply, shaking my head.

  “Who says we didn’t pre-party?” Brent says, and he winks at me when my mouth drops open. His gaze falls to my arm as he runs his fingers over it. He bites his lip before asking, “Have you ever thought about doing anything else?”