Starblind (Starblind #1)

by D T Dyllin

  “Nope. Well …” I raised my head slightly to study my ex-boyfriend for a moment. He was broader and more muscular than the last time I’d seen him. Which made sense since it’d been years. He still had the same square jaw and high cheekbones, but his hair was cut into a short buzz as opposed to the longer floppy do he’d sported when we were younger. He looked every inch the New Earth soldier in his all grey fatigues adorned with the colorful insignia patch on his chest. He was familiar, and yet a stranger. I was glad to know for sure once and for all that I felt nothing for him anymore. Maybe that has something to do with Ash? “How about just letting me go?”

  “You broke the law, Jane.”

  Pulling myself into a sitting position, I regarded Maddox with disdain. “No, I didn’t. The whole fire palms thing is new.” Which now that I was awake and sober … yeah, it kind of freaked me out. I mean, where the hell had it come from? I was guessing it had something to do with mating with Ash. The real question was: Did the mate bond trigger some kind of innate phoenix-y powers, or did I get them from Ash because of the bond? Hell, I had no idea what a full-blooded phoenix could do except turn into flames. Now I had no idea what I was capable of either.

  Maddox scowled at me, his face dipping into hard lines that made him appear much older than he really was. “You expect me to believe that?”

  “Yeah, actually I do. Why would I have hidden something like that back when all I wanted,” I leaned forward, perching my elbows on my knees, “was to be with you? Being Class 1 alienated me from everything I knew and loved.”

  He turned away from me, the muscles in his jaw ticking. “You’re the one who left so suddenly. Just because—”

  “Just because you broke things off with me, and my parents decided I should be on my own, I what … should have stuck around? Begged for scraps of love and attention?” Bitterness dripped from my tone. “Nothing about me changed that day. I just failed a stupid test.”

  Maddox stood and began to pace. “It wasn’t a stupid test—” He abruptly changed direction and came to stand directly in front of my cell, his face practically touching the bars. “If you didn’t hide it then explain to me where the hell that little ability came from.”

  Staring at Maddox the man, I saw little to no traces of the boy I used to love … or thought I’d loved. He was harder and … jaded. Yes, his eyes held the look of someone who had seen too much too quickly and too soon in life. But that’s what New Earth did to its people. It chewed them up and spit them out when they weren’t useful anymore. Maddox was a Class 2. His ability was to throw up an impenetrable force field around himself and sometimes one or two other people if they were close enough. It was what made him perfect for his job as a New Earth special ops agent. He could go in and do all the dirty work he needed with almost no risk to himself. He was born to be practically the perfect soldier.

  “What’s wrong?” I taunted. “Jealous because I’m a Class 3 and you’re just a Class 2?” I couldn’t help but press on that big red button. Maddox had been devastated when he’d tested out as only a Class 2. Special ops hadn’t been where he’d wanted to end up. Special ops was a misleading term; there was nothing special about them, unlike where they had originated in Earth history. I’d read that special ops used to be a coveted position in the military. Only the best of the best were a part of the regime. Now The New Earth First Wave was the job that all young New Earth boys dreamt about. Being a part of them not only meant top pay, but the chance for action and adventure. Maddox had been like every other little boy on New Earth with his desire to be part of the First Wave.

  “Tell me where the hell it came from?” he growled through clenched teeth.

  I leaned back on my elbows to recline as I regarded him. My head was still pounding but it was more manageable than it had been a few minutes ago. “What if I told you I wasn’t really sure?”

  He hit the bars with the palms of his hands, producing a reverberating metallic sound. I cringed. “Then I would say I think you’re full of shit, and I’m hauling you straight back to New Earth where they’ll drag the answers out of you.”

  “Think what you want, but I don’t owe you any answers.” My stubbornness had reared its ugly head. I knew I was cutting my own nose off to spite my face by not at least attempting to make him understand the truth. But I didn’t want to talk to him anymore. “You can leave me alone now.” I waved my hand dismissively, turning away from him.

  “Things have changed on New Earth.” Maddox’s voice dipped to a low rumble. “They won’t merely question you, you know.”

  My nostrils flared and my stomach knotted, but I still refused to look at him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “It means that they’ll poke, prod, and test you to get answers. They’ll do whatever they deem necessary to get the answers to your ability. They’ll want to know how they can duplicate it … unless you can provide those answers for them.”

  Squeezing my eyes shut, I gritted my teeth to keep from responding to him. I wasn’t sure I believed him, but there was a possibility that what he said was true. The gift of fire power would be a sought after Class 3 result that the scientists on New Earth would want to duplicate in other offspring. The problem was … I really didn’t know where it came from or how powerful it was. For all I knew it was a one time thing. Maybe I fizzled out already.

  “Fine, Jane. I guess we’ll just have to do it the hard way … as always.”

  The lights dimmed to a soft glow and the main door slammed as Maddox left me alone with my thoughts. Not good at all in my present state of mind. I started wondering if I would see my parents. I couldn’t help but think about one of the last times I’d seen them.

  I’d come home to find a line of silver garbage bags on my parent’s front porch. A sick feeling immediately settled in my gut. I’d just gotten my results to my Species Classification. I had already been dreading even the thought of telling my father my disappointing results. What else was in store for me besides letting him down?

  Before I could swipe my key card, the front door swung open and my father stepped out, his arms crossed over his chest. He wasn’t a big man, but what he lacked in size he had always made up for with intimidation. My mom demurely followed in his wake.

  Clearing my throat, I fidgeted nervously. “What’s going on?”

  “It’s time for you to be on your own, Jane,” my father stated simply, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

  Blinking rapidly, I tried to process his words. They made sense intellectually, but emotionally? Not so much. “I was planning on moving out when—”

  “We can’t afford to support you anymore. Maybe if you would have pulled in an income from training … but with you being a Class 1 you’re not worth anything.”

  “John!” my mother hissed.

  “What? It’s true. Without her bringing in a paycheck then we can no longer afford to take care of her.”

  “I c-can get a job. I was going to move out soon to be with Maddox. I just need a few weeks … a few days even.” Tears burned the corners of my eyes but I refused to let them fall. “I’m your daughter! Don’t you care what happens to me?”

  My father had already turned to go back inside when my mother approached me. “It’ll be okay, Jane. You know I love you, right?”

  I nodded numbly. At least I thought she and my father loved me. I wasn’t so sure anymore. Had I always just been a future paycheck or like some kind of possession they could be proud of? I didn’t understand how one little test could turn them from me so quickly. It was as if they were completely different people from a few hours ago. “I’ll just go to Maddox, it’ll be fine. I’ll come back for my stuff later.

  It hadn’t been fine. When I’d gone to Maddox he’d broken things off with me. I’d been so upset that I’d shot him in the arm. I still wasn’t sure how things had escalated to that point, though. Later when I’d gone to retrieve some of my things they’d all been gone, probably incinerated with the evening�
��s trash. I remembered breaking down right there in the street, begging for my parents to take me in because I had nowhere to go—no money and no possessions. My father had threatened to have me arrested if I didn’t get off his property. That night I’d stolen away on a ship, leaving for destinations unknown. I didn’t care where I ended up as long as it was as far away from New Earth as possible.

  More memories washed over me from that horrible time in my life. I let myself be carried away by them as the anguish and pain ripped at me like it had all happened yesterday. At some point I finally fell asleep.

  “What the hell?” I sputtered, as a cascade of ice water hit my face. That’s when I realized I was no longer in a cell. I was restrained in a reclining chair in a type of room that was all too familiar to me from my time on New Earth. A middle-aged scientist stood before me in a white lab coat.

  When I eyed him with hostility he merely spoke into his recording device. “Subject is awake. Questions will be followed with measures suited to answers.” He lifted his gaze to regard me with cold detachment. “Please state your name for the record.”

  “I’m relatively sure you’ve already been informed of my name,” I grated.

  “Subject is being difficult,” he said into his device.

  “I’m not a subject, I’m a fucking human being!” Or at least part human. “And you have no right to detain me. I’m not a citizen of New Earth. Maddox basically kidnapped me!” I struggled to get free, but the high-grade laser restraints didn’t budge. Not that I’d expected them to, but I wasn’t just going to lie there all complacent.

  The door behind the scientist slid open and two others in lab coats joined him—one was a young female, and the other was a male who looked barely out of diapers. They both regarded me with the same cold detachment as the first scientist. “The subject is being difficult. I’m going to forgo the rest of the questions and move straight into the testing.”

  “Oh, hell no!” I screeched. “You people just can’t kidnap me and then experiment on me without any consequences.” The trio ignored me, like I wasn’t even there, and busied themselves gathering various materials from cabinets around the room.

  A tray with surgical instruments was wheeled right next to me. I trembled. “You can’t do this to a non-citizen,” I tried again. My eyes widened as a huge needle filled with a greenish fluid was picked up by scientist number one. “I-I-I’m under contract with the UGFS!” I yelled. “Contact Ambassador Aralias! If you keep me from doing my job you’re all going to be in big trouble!” Now, why hadn’t I thought to name drop before? Of course, if they did contact the ambassador I would run the risk of exposing my bond to Ash. I was pretty sure that wouldn’t go over very well with him. But then again … I could lie my ass off. I just have to think up a decent one first.

  The trio was currently murmuring to each other and I was hoping they’d decide to contact the ambassador before they actually got needle happy. I really wasn’t in the mood to become some kind of pincushion. The female scientist left the room and the other two busied themselves with more tasks that set me on edge. I attempted to steady my breathing, but the pungent smell of chemicals assaulted my nose and kept me on edge.

  The door slamming open stole everyone’s attention. Maddox strode in with a very pissed off expression plastered on his face. His muscles were rigid with tension as he approached me. “Is it all a big joke to you? You’re on a job for the UGFS and you’re just now mentioning it? Or is it another one of your lies?”

  “I don’t understand where all your hostility towards me is coming from.” Okay, so I’d shot him once. But that was eons ago. Get over it already. It just served to illustrate how I always wore my heart on my sleeve. “When did I ever lie to you?” I spat, my face heating as anger washed over me. “I didn’t think to mention it because you have no right to take a non-New Earth citizen! I didn’t think any of this would go so far!” I roared at the top of my lungs.

  And what the hell was up with Ash? Hadn’t he said he wouldn’t let anything physically bad happen to me? I was about to be experimented on and tortured, and I hadn’t heard a peep from him. So much for depending on my new mate who I barely know anything about. I almost laughed at the absurdity that I’d actually thought it was a somewhat good idea.

  “I always keep my word.” Ash’s voice glided through my mind just as a huge fireball exploded the door and blazed into the room. The two scientific amigos exited as quickly as their legs could carry them, the younger male scientist screaming like a teenage girl. Maddox threw up a shield to protect himself. Not one of them seemed concerned about me being burnt alive. Maddox didn’t know that I could withstand any grade of fire; he was only worried about himself. There really was none of the boy from my childhood left in him. I had at least expected a bit of sentimentality. Would it have killed him to stand close enough to shield me, too?

  Ash dashed into the room in his human form, releasing me from my bonds with ease. He scooped me up in his arms, shifting to his fire form on the fly. The sensation was odd, like being weightless and cocooned in flame while soaring through the air. Being surrounded by what I knew was Ash, warmed not only my flesh, but something deep inside of me. Exhaustion suddenly weighed me down, and my eyes slid shut as I was taken to safety.

  I woke up expecting to be on Ash’s ship or at least to have him near me … but nope. I came to in my living quarters on The Pittsburgh with my crew all crowded in around me. I guess Ash is still really pissed at me. I lifted my head to sweep my gaze over everyone … correction: my crew plus Dar. Or maybe he was a part of my crew now? Had I picked up an additional member without even knowing it? I shook my head and willed myself to focus. I was feeling a bit … off.

  “What happened?” I groaned, pressing my fingertips into my temples.

  “Why do you never listen to me?” Zula demanded. “I told you not to go off the ship completely out of your mind on firejuice. Even I hadn’t expected for you to go and get yourself kidnapped. We—”

  “Had no idea where you were or what happened to you,” Tamzea finished for Zula. Her face was scrunched up with anxiety, which was worse than anger, in my opinion. I didn’t want to be the source of her getting ulcers later on in life. Unless … could healers internally heal themselves? I’d have to ask her about that later. I can’t believe I’ve never wondered about it before.

  I sat up slowly and the room tilted a bit on its axis. “Look, I— Where’s Ash?”

  Zula flung her hands up in the air. “After everything the first thing you ask about is him?”

  “Technically second,” I grumbled. “I did ask what happened first.” Masha and Dar backed slowly out of the room, and when I glanced over at them they both spared me a shy smile. At least they seemed to only want to know if I was okay. Zula and Tamzea could take lessons from them. Maybe having Dar onboard wasn’t such a bad deal after all.

  “Tell us why you were taken to New Earth.” Tamzea sat on the edge of the bed and Zula remained standing, her glare burning into me.

  “Ash didn’t tell you anything?”

  “No. He just appeared with you and disappeared again,” Zula said with annoyance.

  “Oooh … so the not knowing part is driving you crazy.” I laughed. “But wait, how did you guys know at all about me being taken to New Earth?”

  Zula scrunched her nose. “We questioned some of the … riff-raff from the bar you were at.”

  “Riff-raff?” I laughed again. “That must have been a sight to see. I’m sorry I missed it.”

  “Just tell us what happened,” Zula demanded.

  I rolled my eyes. “Okay, okay … ”

  I set in to tell them everything that had happened to me in the short time I’d been gone. When I was done, Zula was deep in thought, and Tamzea appeared to be even more anxious than when I began my adventurous tale.

  “What are you going to do now?” Tamzea shifted uneasily. “No matter what you do, I— How did you even end up in this situation?”

&n
bsp; “She couldn’t keep her damn legs closed, that’s how,” Zula stated, her attention not fully on us. But before I could ream her out for trying to slut shame me … yet again, she stood up straight with her eyes blazing. “We need to find out what’s on that chip. It’s the only answer.”

  “How did you arrive at that conclusion?” Could Galvraron’s have mental breakdowns? Had I driven her to lose it? “I thought you said it was better if we didn’t know what was on that chip.”

  “Things have changed.”

  “Okaaay … And how exactly do you suggest we get a look at the info on the chip? You want me to just explain things to Ash and ask him to share whatever he’s hiding?”

  Zula tapped her chin, and Tamzea flitted her gaze back and forth between the two of us. “Yes, that doesn’t seem like such a bad idea.”

  I snorted. “In case you’ve forgotten already … Ash is helluva pissed at me. You really think he’s going to come here when I have that blade?”

  “Yes, I do actually.”

  “You have lost it!”

  Zula pressed her lips into a thin line. “No I haven’t,” she ground out. “He did come to save you after all. Just contact him. Explain to him what you want.”

  “No need.” Ash’s voice caused all three of us to jump as he appeared in the doorway. Giving me a cocky half grin, he leaned against the wall. “Well, I’m here. Let the groveling begin.”

  I stood, slowly letting my gaze travel the length of him. I’d been struck with an instant attraction to him the moment I’d first laid eyes on him, at least physically. The thing about Ash was … he seemed to be growing more attractive to me the more time I spent around him. If I really picked him apart, I knew he didn’t have the features that every woman would find appealing, but to me he exuded the kind of raw sex appeal that made me want to climb him like an insane ape. Maybe it was the mate process at work or maybe it was merely that intangible thing that made certain people more attractive the longer you knew them, and others less so. Either way … Ash couldn’t be more appealing if he tried.