Never Let Go (Haven, Montana Book 2)

by Jill Sanders

  “Sure. He’s yours to name.”

  “Why?” Trent leaned away and looked at her. “Why did you get him for me?”

  “He’s not the only gift I got today. I stopped by the animal clinic to check in on that little Pekinese dog that my mother liked.”

  “And?”

  “Ralphie was very happy to see my mother when I dropped him off at her place.”

  “How did your mother take it?”

  “She was in love.” She smiled. “For the first time in my life, I watched tears come into her eyes.” Addy shook her head as her smile fell away slightly. “Funny. I never thought I could crack that shell of hers. Even when Dad died, she didn’t shed a tear.”

  “Some people hide their emotions very well.”

  “Yeah, I suppose. But today I could tell that she was genuinely happy.” Addy reached over and took the puppy from him, gave it a huge hug, then set it down so it could run around at their feet.

  “Maybe that was just what she needed,” Trent said.

  “What about you?” Addy asked. “What do you need?”

  He smiled quickly. “You.” Her eyebrows shot up.

  “And?”

  “Is there anything more?” He drew her closer. “What do you need?”

  She shook her head and sighed. “I still don’t know.”

  He felt something close to fear close his throat. “Until you do, you don’t plan on going anywhere, do you?”

  She shook her head again, causing the breath he’d been holding to release. “No, there isn’t any place else for me.”

  “You make that sound like it’s a bad thing. Don’t you like it here with me?” he added after a very short pause.

  “Yes, I do. But I just don’t know how long . . . things will last.”

  “If I had my way, they’d stay like this forever,” he said, feeling a sudden need to convince her.

  She nodded and leaned against his chest. “Did you find anything out today?”

  He allowed her to change the subject given the sudden tightness in his chest.

  “No.” He stood up. “But you’re not the only one who can give gifts. Come with me.”

  His new dog, Happy, followed him to the truck and sat down with a small plop as Trent pulled out the first tree.

  “For you.” He watched her expression turn from sad to happy.

  “Oh, they’re beautiful,” she said, moving around to see the rest of what he had in the bed of the truck. “Where are you going to put them?”

  “We are going to decide that together,” he said, reaching in and handing her a shovel.

  Addy stood back and dusted off her hands. Two can play this game, she thought as she looked at the pot of flowers she’d just organized. Two massive silver pots stuffed with blooms sat on either end of their picnic table. When Trent came home from work, she had a few other surprises in store for him too.

  She’d gone shopping at one of the small boutiques in town. Nothing fancy, but she’d found the prettiest dress for Kristen and Tyler’s wedding and had splurged to buy a new pair of heels.

  Since the wedding was less than two days away, no one in town had anything to chat about other than who would attend, what they would be wearing, and who would be with who. Even gossip about the recent fires and Kristen’s kidnapping fell to the sidelines. Addy had been thankful that everyone had found something more positive to talk about.

  She pulled out the water hose that Trent had purchased and wrapped up next to the spout and rinsed off the remaining dirt around the flower pots.

  She stood back and smiled, then turned around when the sun peeked out from behind a cloud. Her breath caught in her chest at the beauty. The spot Trent had picked was slightly up on the side of a small hill so that they overlooked the same green fields his mother’s place did, just at a different angle. Thick trees covered the hillsides surrounding the opening. There was a small creek that ran directly through the grassy land. The view of the mountains was something everyone who lived in Montana would never get tired of, including her.

  She could see the old red barn that held the horses, and if she wanted, it would be a short walk over to say hello to Grace and Hank. Glancing down at her watch she decided, with her few remaining free hours, to take the short walk. Grabbing a light jacket, she locked up and started across the sun-drenched field.

  Trent had taken Happy with him to work that day, saying he wanted the dog to get used to going everywhere with him. He’d gone out and bought him a dog bed, forty pounds of puppy food, bowls for food and water, and toys. Tons and tons of toys. Now everywhere she stepped in the trailer, something squeaked under her feet.

  Still, she didn’t complain. Especially after Happy crawled next to her and cuddled as she slept. She knew the dog was small now, but the vet had told her that he would end up being around sixty pounds. She just hoped the dog could wait until Trent’s house got there to do most of the growing.

  The smell of fresh grass under her feet mingled with the scent of Douglas fir. She’d forgotten how much she loved spring in Montana. How large everything looked, how wonderful it felt to know the place you were in, the people around you.

  Her mother had told her that since she was living out there all alone now, she had purchased a new cell phone. She had even texted Addy a few pictures of Ralphie with some new toys. The dog looked so happy and so did her mother.

  Addy made it to the back gate and easily climbed over the fence. She had taken about a dozen steps when the two horses came running around the barn and headed straight for her.

  Her first instinct was to run back the way she’d come, but then she realized that they were rushing to her because they were excited to see her. Just like big dogs.

  She laughed as they came closer, both of them making plenty of noise. Hank had a huskier neigh, while Grace’s was higher pitched.

  They didn’t slow down until they were a few feet from her, then both of them halted like someone had pulled on their invisible reins. They walked directly up to her and started rubbing themselves against her, almost causing her to fall over.

  “Well, hello to both of you too.” She laughed and stood in the field, enjoying them both.

  “I wondered what they were up to—they were making so much noise to get out of their stalls,” Trisha called out. “They must have heard you coming.”

  She’d been so busy with the horses, she hadn’t seen Trisha approach from the barn.

  Addy waved to the woman. “Yeah, I was pretty loud getting over that fence.” She nodded back to the gate area.

  “No one can get past Hank, he has hearing like a bat,” Trisha said as she stopped directly next to the horse.

  “I thought I’d come over and see these two. I’m trying to get used to being around horses.”

  Trisha cocked her head. “Gail told me that she took you riding for the first time. If you ever want to go, just come on over. I can show you how to saddle them up and cool them off if you want.”

  “That would be great. I don’t think I’m ready for solo riding yet, but . . .”

  “No problem.” Trisha smiled. “Gail or I am always around. We always have time to take these two out.”

  Addy sighed and leaned against Grace. “She’s such a sweetie.” She chuckled when Grace nibbled on her shirt.

  “I heard you got Trent a puppy?”

  Addy laughed. “Yes, Happy. It’s the dog’s name,” she added when Trisha looked at her in question.

  “What breed?”

  “Full-blood mutt. Dr. Shultz, the vet, says he’ll grow to about sixty pounds.”

  Trisha and Addy started to walk back to the barn. Both horses fell into step and followed them. “He seems like a nice man.”

  “Yeah, I never really knew him, or a lot of others in town. My mother didn’t like animals. At least, she didn’t while I was growing up.”

  “Oh?” Trisha asked.

  Addy stopped walking and instantly had Grace snuggling into her shoulder again.

/>   “You may have heard the rumors.” She sighed. “My mother was very abusive to my father and me. Now, however, I can tell she’s trying.”

  “I heard.” Trisha nodded. “How does that make you feel?”

  Addy didn’t know why she felt compelled to open up to the woman. Maybe it was the kind look in her blue eyes. Or maybe it was the fact that Grace was letting her lean on her and showing Addy unconditional love, which made her feel so safe that something shifted inside her.

  Either way, Addy swelled with a string of feelings that she hadn’t even really owned up to before, let alone wanted to say out loud to anyone.

  She leaned against the gentle horse as tears streamed down her cheeks and told Trisha everything her mother had done to her in the past. How she felt about it and why she struggled with feeling secure in her relationship with Trent. Trisha stood there, listening to everything Addy said with kindness in her eyes.

  When Addy felt her chest tighten and felt like she was out of breath, she stopped.

  Trisha looked at her closely. “Don’t close your mind to the possibilities around here because of your family. From the sounds of it, you have your mother on the right path to being a better person. You deserve happiness, despite how the woman raised you.”

  They both glanced over to the house. Sometime during their talk, the sun had sunk below the hills. Several lights had been turned on in the house, lighting the place up, making it look even more glorious. “This is a great place to heal, and a great family who love unconditionally.” Trisha placed her hand over Addy’s. “Come around anytime you like. Opening up is sometimes the best medicine for healing.” She leaned in and placed a soft kiss on Addy’s cheek. “I’m happy your mother is learning to love from such a wonderful young woman.”

  Addy thought about the conversation as she walked back to her trailer.

  The floodlight Trent had installed a few nights ago acted as a beacon, directing her to their little home.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

  The day before Tyler and Kristen’s wedding came and Gail’s house was a flurry of activity. For Trent’s part, he was running around trying to help set up all the large round tables on the side yard while his brothers hung up the string lights Tyler had purchased. Addy and Kristen were in the house, helping Trisha and his mother get things ready for guests.

  The work continued until late in the afternoon. They had taken a longer time than planned setting up a small dance floor since they had to rearrange the tables to make room. But the finished product looked amazing. Tyler flipped on the lights, and Trent could tell with the cream-colored tablecloths and dark rose centerpieces in place tomorrow, the atmosphere was going to be perfect. His mother and the ladies came out to survey the work.

  “What about a bachelor party?” Trent asked, toasting with his beer.

  “I don’t need one.” Tyler smiled and hugged Kristen to him. “It’s not like I’m going to miss those days at all.”

  Kristen chuckled. “Right. The days of the oldest McGowan sweeping women off their feet are over.”

  “The only woman I want to sweep off her feet is you. Of course, it will probably be because you have those stupid fur boots on and there’s a foot of snow on the ground,” Tyler joked, causing Kristen to smack his shoulder playfully.

  “You like my shoes,” Kristen said in reply.

  “Sure, when that’s all you’re wearing.” Tyler kissed her.

  “TMI,” Trisha laughed. “TMI.”

  “I think Happy needs a friend,” Gail piped in.

  “Oh?” Addy glanced down at the small dog lying at their feet.

  Happy had tagged along with Trent all day without any issues. The little dog loved riding in his truck on errands, loved playing in Gail’s backyard, and had even had some quality time with Hank.

  At one point Trent had lost track of the puppy and had found him over near the barn, sniffing around Hank. He had stood back and watched as the old horse actually played with the puppy for almost ten minutes straight.

  “Yes, I’ve been thinking of getting another dog. It’s been years since Sneezy passed away,” his mother said.

  Addy sat up at that. “Wait a minute. Sneezy?”

  “What?” Trent said, smiling.

  “The seven dwarfs?” she said. “You name your dogs after Snow White?”

  He looked over at his mother. “It was her idea.”

  “We’ve had a Grumpy and a Sneezy. Good dogs, both of them.” She nodded down to the black blob currently snoring at his feet. “Each name fit perfectly, as does Happy with this little guy.”

  “Should have named him Sleepy,” Trey said, chuckling. “Or Snorey.”

  Everyone laughed.

  “What?” Trey asked.

  “There was no Snorey,” Trent supplied.

  Trey shrugged. “How would I remember? I was five when I watched Snow White last.” He leaned back and crossed his arms.

  “He still has a few brothers and sisters at the clinic,” Addy said to Trent. “Someone dropped them off after finding them in a box in an alley. I can check with Dr. Shultz Monday, if you want.”

  “Let us know too,” Tyler said, glancing over at Kristen. “We were talking about it earlier today. Of course, it will have to keep until we get back from our honeymoon.”

  “How many brothers and sisters?” Trey asked.

  Addy looked over at him. “Six total.”

  “Hell, might as well sign me up too.” He shrugged. “That way we can keep the family together.”

  His mother chuckled. “We’re just a bunch of softies.” She reached down and picked Happy up. The small dog stretched, did a circle in her lap, and then fell back asleep.

  “Told you. Should have named him Sleepy,” Trey said.

  “You can name yours Sleepy. This one already has a name, and it fits him just fine,” Gail said.

  An hour later Addy and Trent left his family and started walking back to their site. Trent carried the still-sleeping Happy home as Addy walked beside him.

  “You’re quiet.” She’d withdrawn as the evening went on, he noticed.

  “Just deep in thought,” she said.

  “About?” He reached over and opened the gate in the middle of the field separating his land from his mother’s and let Addy step through, then latched it again.

  “How different your family is from mine.” She sighed.

  He reached over and took her hand after shifting Happy slightly so he could have a free one.

  “From the sounds of it, your mother is making an effort.”

  “She is,” she said. “And I hope she will continue to make changes, but some part of me still can’t let go of the hurt. Part of me will never really trust her.”

  He squeezed her hand to stop their momentum. They were standing in the middle of his land, the full moon hovering above them, as his small warm dog snored softly in his arms. He’d never felt more complete than at that moment.

  He knew that Addy was still struggling with making a decision about her life, but he hoped that over the next few months, he’d show her that she was where she belonged. Here, with him and Happy. In marriage or not, so long as they were together.

  “I hope you trust me now,” he said, scanning those blue eyes of hers. Even in the darkness, he could see the change when her eyes softened as she looked at him.

  “Yes.” She smiled. “There was a time in my life I didn’t think I could ever trust you either. I think it never really had anything to do with you but with my mother instead.”

  He drew her close, Happy tucked between them. “Sometimes time heals wounds, other times, people change. Just like this.” He leaned in and covered her lips with his. “I never thought I could be here, like this, with you. Now I can’t imagine ever not being like this.” He sighed when he felt her stiffen slightly. “Please don’t overthink things tonight. Just know that I never thought I could be this happy. Never.”

  After a moment, she nodded, then intertwined her fingers with
his and started walking again. “I invited my mother to the wedding tomorrow,” she said when they reached the trailer. “I hope that was okay.”

  Trent nodded and smiled as he laid the small dog down in his new bed, even though they both knew Happy would end up on their bed by morning. “Yes, I think Kristen and Tyler wouldn’t mind.” He rose and took her in his arms. “Now,” he said as he started kissing her, “tell me again about that sexy dress you bought for tomorrow.” He nibbled down the column of her neck.

  “I thought you were too tired?” She slowly rubbed her hips against his, sending a wave of heat traveling through his entire body.

  “I’m never too tired for you,” he said before his lips took hers again.

  He could have spent all night enjoying the feel of her lips against his, her body rubbing slowly along his length.

  But soon Addy pushed him back onto the bed, and he helped her remove his boots.

  After she tossed first one boot toward the front door then the other, she stood at the end of the bed and slowly removed her own clothes. She inched up her shirt, then tossed it down. His eyes tracked her every movement as she tugged down her pants, then stepped out of them while she watched his expression with equal intensity.

  “You’re so beautiful.” His voice sounded scratchy as he felt the air lock in his throat.

  Her fingers walked up his legs, then worked on his jean clasp. He let her tug his pants down his hips and off his legs. Her expression turned greedy, seeing him ready for her.

  He couldn’t stop the gasp when she wrapped her fingers around him, then followed with her lips. A groan escaped as she moved her mouth on him. His fingers dug into her hair as he threw his head back and concentrated on what she was doing to him.

  “My god!” he moaned, his hips moving with her motion.

  He’d been holding in his feelings for her, afraid of scaring her off. It was too soon to tell her that he wanted her here, with him, for the rest of their lives. Especially when he knew that she hadn’t even decided what she wanted to do.

  But as she climbed higher and his hands instantly went to her hips, he looked up at her and knew that he didn’t want to hold in his feelings anymore. Not now, not when there was a chance it could help her decide to stay with him.