Sinful Purity (Sinful Series)

by K. A. Standen

  “Well, good thing you’re not going to remember this in the morning, Liz.”

  The next thing I knew, it was incredibly bright in my room. I woke up with a pounding headache and my lips were sore and puffy.

  That’s odd.

  I looked around the room, trying to piece together the night before. I was still wearing my same clothes. That’s good.

  I vaguely remembered Caleb. Then the images started rushing back to me. My stomach felt queasy. I lay there, afraid I’d throw up if I moved any more. I glanced over at my alarm. It was one thirty in the afternoon. I had slept through all my morning classes. If I hurried I could make the last bit of anatomy and all of western civilizations, but my throbbing head and spinning stomach had something else in mind. So I curled back up in bed and went back to sleep. I woke again at four and decided that I needed to shower and get dressed. I was afraid to miss a day of work at the orphanage. I still wasn’t exactly sure what had happened last night, but I certainly didn’t want to make anything worse by not showing up.

  It was six thirty by the time I arrived at MIQ. I was more than a couple of hours late. When I arrived, the children had already had dinner. I went to the kitchen to see if there were any leftovers I could pick at. I hadn’t eaten all day and my stomach was more than a little complainy about the whole thing. After my snack I began washing the dinner dishes. Sister Laverne walked in—curious, I’m sure, about the clanking and banging.

  “Well, Mary Elizabeth. We didn’t think we’d be seeing you today. Not with you not feeling well and all.”

  “I didn’t want to miss work, Sister.”

  “That’s very admirable, dear. Honestly, though, you look terrible. Why don’t you find Mother and then head home.”

  “Yes, Sister.” That sounded like a marvelous idea. I did still feel absolutely awful.

  I walked up the stairs to Sister Christine’s office. As I turned the corner, I could hear arguing coming from behind the door.

  “I have every right, according to the word of God,” a deep and angry voice bellowed.

  “You know that is different. You’re not guiding, not leading. You’re changing personalities!” a female voice cried. It sounded like Sister Christine. Or maybe I just assumed it was Sister Christine because it was coming from her office.

  “You weren’t so concerned when my actions were making your orphanage famous and you wealthy,” the male voice said.

  “You know it was never about the money,” the lady’s voice pleaded. “There have been too many incidents, too much suspicion. Someone is going to uncover the truth.”

  “We will never be discovered.” The male voice was angry at the insult.

  “I had a girl almost die, another in and out of the infirmary, and the boy—”

  “I have made adjustments. There is no need to worry, Sister.” The male voice seemed calmer.

  Did he just say Sister? Is Sister Christine behind something sinister?

  “And what about her?” Sister asked.

  “What do you care about her? She’s mine, not yours,” the male voice spewed with venom.

  “You must let her go. She’s drawing too much attention. I’ve let your obsession go on long enough!”

  “This matter is closed!” the man screamed back. Then his voice turned sickeningly sweet and condescending. “I’ll take your concerns into consideration, Sister.” The arguing stopped. I panicked. I knew that one of the two angry participants would be opening that door any second to find me standing there frozen in disbelief. A scandal at Mary Immaculate Queen. Had the reporters been right all along? I quickly pulled my head together and quietly ran down the stairs and out the front doors. I never had a chance to tell Sister Christine I was leaving. But I was sure Sister Laverne would tell her that I wasn’t feeling well and that she’d sent me home. Maybe that would be enough. But what if Mother knew I would always ask her permission first? What if she assumed I had overheard her argument with the strange, angry man? What would she do? Well, it was too late now. I couldn’t go back; she’d already know that I’d left. It would look even more suspicious to return. I would just have to play it off. I was really sick and had to go home immediately. That’s what I would tell her if she ever asked.

  By the time I got back to my dorm, I was frozen and exhausted. I had run practically the whole way home. I was terrified. I couldn’t get the villainous voices out of my head. My nerves were all on edge. I couldn’t sit still. I didn’t know what to do. Then there was a knock on my door. My mind raced. Oh my God. They know. Someone spoke.

  “Liz, darlin? Ya in there?” Lucy called.

  I sighed a pure, pristine sigh of relief. It was only Lucy. “Yeah, I’m here. Just a sec,” I called as I walked to the door to open it. Lucy and Caleb were standing on the other side.

  “We were worried about you,” Lucy said. “You weren’t in class today.”

  “I wasn’t feeling very well, that’s all.”

  “See, Lucy? I told you she was probably just sick,” Caleb snapped. I could tell by the way he looked at me that he hadn’t told Lucy anything about last night.

  “Yeah, I’m fine. I think it’s just a little bug.” I gave Caleb a little knowing smile as if to say thanks.

  “Well, okay. If you’re sure,” Lucy conceded.

  “Yeah, I think I just need some rest.”

  “No problem, Liz. Let’s go, Lucy. Let’s let her get some rest.” Caleb dragged Lucy off unwillingly.

  “We’ll see ya tomorrow, right?” Lucy called from around the corner.

  “Absolutely,” I called back with a wave.

  I closed and locked the door. I wasn’t even all the way back to my bed when there was another knock on my door.

  “Oh, Lucy!” I exclaimed. I knew she wouldn’t give up that easily.

  “No, it’s Zack,” the voice called hesitantly.

  “Zack?”

  “Yes, do you mind opening the door?”

  “No.” I walked over to unlock it.

  “No?”

  I opened the door. “I mean, no, I don’t mind opening the door.”

  We both smiled and he let out a nervous laugh as he came inside. I sat down on my bed. “You can sit down if you want,” I offered, gesturing to my desk chair.

  “Okay, thanks,” he said, and sat down on the bed next to me.

  “I meant over there.” Once again I pointed to the chair as I scooted farther away.

  “Don’t be like that,” Zack said with a coy smile. “I came all the way over here to see if you were okay. Caleb told me you weren’t feeling well when he went to pick you up last night.”

  “Caleb told you he picked me up last night?”

  “Well, actually I answered the phone when his dad called.”

  “His dad called?” This was getting worse and worse by the minute.

  “You don’t know any of this?” he asked, surprised.

  “Last night is a little fuzzy.”

  “Okay, then I’ll tell you. Caleb and I were hanging out in our room. The phone rang, and it was Caleb’s dad. He sounded all worked up. But he always sounds that way. He asked to talk to Caleb. I gave Caleb the phone, and a couple of seconds later he hung up. I asked him what was going on. He said he needed to go by the church. I asked why, remembering that you said you were going there. Caleb told me you were sick and needed a ride home. I asked if I could go get you, but he told me he’d better go. Something about it already being arranged. That’s it.”

  “You offered to come get me?” I asked, surprised and secretly flattered.

  “Yeah, I did. Is that okay?”

  “Yeah, that’s okay. It’s actually kind of sweet.”

  “Does that mean points for me?” Zack joked; his eyes twinkled mischievously.

  “I’ll give you a couple for effort,” I teased.

  “Great, I’ll take ’em.”

  “So why’d you come here tonight? I mean, if Caleb already told you I was okay.”

  “You weren’t i
n class. I wanted to make sure you were really okay. And I missed seeing you.”

  “I’m fine, really. Just a twenty-four-hour bug. That’s all. I’ll be back in class tomorrow.”

  “I think you missed the ‘I missed you part.’”

  “No, I heard you. I just didn’t know what to make of it,” I admitted.

  “You can make whatever you want of it. I’m sure you won’t be very far off.” His voice hinted of something more.

  “Why? Did you want to sit next to me again?” I asked with a little flirtation in my voice.

  “Baby, I’ll do anything to be close to you,” Zack replied, picking up on the flirtation and carrying it to the next level.

  “Wow, do you use that line often?” I mocked with a hint of sarcasm.

  “Ouch! I was being sincere. Although I guess that would be a good one to remember, if it works.” Zack smiled, all adorable-like.

  “Do you think it’s working?” I asked coyly.

  “I don’t know. You haven’t told me if you’d like to go with me to the movies tomorrow night.”

  “What?”

  “Look, Liz. Let me be straight. Caleb told me you were more the date type. That you needed a clear gesture. So I thought maybe if I came here tonight and checked on you, you might say yes to going on a date with me. Just you and me, no other friends or people from school. Maybe it’d be a chance to get to know each other. A chance to show you I’m not the jerk you think I am.”

  “Yes,” I said, taken aback by his honesty and vulnerability.

  “Yes?”

  “Yes, I would love to go on a date with you.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah, I think I’d like to get to know you better,” I admitted honestly, out loud for all to hear. Apparently I had decided.

  “Great!” Zack said enthusiastically, grabbing my hand from the bed and kissing it. “I’ll see you tomorrow in class. Feel better, okay?”

  “In class,” I acknowledged, following him to the door and closing it behind him.

  Wow. Tomorrow I would go on my first date. My first date with Zack or anyone. I knew I wouldn’t get much sleep tonight.

  I awoke in the morning as tired as when I fell asleep only a couple of hours before. I quickly showered, got dressed, threw on some sparse-but-at-least-it-was-there makeup, and ran off to my first class. Calculus, as always, was less than riveting. By the time I got to Catholic traditions, I was very excited to see Caleb. As I walked through the door, I saw him already seated in our usual spot.

  “I hear wonderful things are in the works,” he said with an impish grin.

  “Don’t even say it, Caleb. It was a moment of weakness, I assure you.”

  “A moment of destiny,” he teased.

  I let out a little laugh, shaking my head.

  “All I’m saying is go and have a good time, okay? You deserve it.”

  “Okay.” Once again I appreciated Caleb’s ability to know when not to say anything.

  After class we met Lucy at our table in the cafeteria. It looked as though she had been sitting there for a while. Her lunch tray was nearly empty and she had that look on her face like, “it’s about time.”

  “Look who’s feelin’ better,” she said with a big cheerful smile.

  “Yep, I’m on the mend. Thanks for stopping by to check on me. It was really sweet.”

  “Oh, no problem, suga’. That’s just the kinda thing we do for our friends.”

  Before the conversation could continue, Zack walked by our table. “Still on for tonight, Liz?”

  I nodded with an understated smile as I watched his cute butt and long lean legs walk away.

  “What was that?” Lucy cooed.

  “Liz and Zack have a date to go to the movies tonight,” Caleb interjected. I wasn’t sure if he meant to rub my face in my own embarrassment or to save me from more.

  Lucy smirked. “Well, well, well. I guess we’re done hatin’ him now, aren’t we?”

  “I’m going to give him a chance,” I replied, trying to keep my dignity intact.

  “Do tell!” Lucy urged.

  “Nothing to tell. We’re going to the movies. That’s all.”

  “You will tell me when ya get back, won’t ya?”

  “Of course, Lucy. And I’m sure that anything I forget, Caleb here can fill you in on.” I gave him my best “please save me” look.

  “Oooohweee, I can’t wait. This is the most exciting news all week!” Lucy exclaimed, taking the last sip of her soda.

  Anatomy class was dull, but on a positive note, it wasn’t at all gross today. Lucy and Caleb didn’t mention anything more about Zack’s and my date tonight, which made me very, very relieved. I looked at the clock and realized that it was time for me to head to western civilizations. I was a little nervous to see Zack. I knew it was silly to be nervous about a class with him when we were going to be alone together later. But I don’t think Zack made me as nervous as all of his friends’ judgmental eyes glowering down upon me.

  I walked into western civilizations and took my regular seat. I began thumbing through the book, trying to avoid eye contact with anyone, the way I sometimes did when I was nervous. Then I heard his smooth, almost sultry voice.

  “Hey, beautiful.”

  I looked up to see Zack standing next to me. I gave him a little smile and could feel my cheeks flush with excitement.

  “Do you mind if I sit next to you today? I promise they won’t look twice.” Zack stared at his friends sitting at the front of the class.

  “Okay,” I replied meekly and more than a little nervous.

  Zack took the seat next to me. As soon as he did, the track goons and groupies at the front of the class turned around, never to look back at us again for the entire class. Wow, that’s a way to keep his promise.

  During the whole class, Zack never let my hand go. Even though no one was looking this time, he still hung on like his life depended on it. In fact, he never took his eyes off me. He never looked down at his paper or up at Professor Jacarse. He just kept his eyes fixated on me. It made me uncomfortable, anxious, and exhilarated all at the same time. Part of me somewhere inside didn’t want class to end.

  “I’m not good with attention,” I whispered in his ear.

  “I’m sorry about that. Because you have mine,” Zack said with the smoothness of silk.

  When class got out, Zack walked me back to my dorm. He held my hand the entire way. It seemed so silly. I almost wanted to laugh, but I didn’t want to hurt his feelings.

  “I’ll pick you up at eight, okay?”

  “That sounds great,” I said with a smile.

  “Good. I’ll see you then.” Zack finally let go of my hand, only to turn to me and give me a kiss on my cheek.

  That was really sweet.

  I went up to my room to get ready. I had no idea what to wear. Even if I had, I didn’t have a lot of clothes—at least, not any clothes that weren’t blue-and-gray parochial uniforms. I quickly scanned my closet. Against my better judgment, I chose a blouse Kelly had given me for my birthday a couple of years back. It was a black, kind of off-the-shoulder, torn t-shirt thing that tied up the side. I knew that this could not be a good choice, but I didn’t have anything else to work with. I threw it on with a pair of jeans. I let my long dark hair hang down in its natural waves and put on my makeup. I didn’t look perfect by any means, but I thought my makeup turned out okay.

  The clock on my dresser turned to eight o’clock. I held my breath for a second, knowing that at any minute there’d be a knock at my door. On the other side would stand Zack, waiting to pick me up for my first date.

  Innocence Lost

  Just as I’d imagined, Zack knocked on my door, told me I looked gorgeous, and walked me down to where his truck waited to take me away. It wasn’t totally like a fairytale, but it seemed like one to me.

  “I’m really glad you decided to come out with me,” Zack said.

  “Yeah, me too.”

  “If you
don’t mind a little drive, there’s a great shrimp and chip joint right off the highway up here.”

  “No, I don’t mind. I’ve never had shrimp and chips.”

  “Really? That’s crazy. Anyway, I thought you might like it. It’s one of my favorite places. I don’t usually take anyone there. It’s kind of my hideaway.”

  “You don’t take dates there?” I asked.

  “Not usually. You’re the first.”

  “Why are you taking me there, then?”

  “Because I want you to get to know me. It seems important to you. Plus Caleb said I had to be careful with you.”

  “Careful?”

  “Let me put it a different way. He said you were special, that my regular date night wouldn’t work on you. That you needed to feel like you knew me, so you could trust me. I think it was something like that.”

  “What is your regular date night?” I asked skeptically, feeling as though I was out with a serial dater.

  “Football, basketball games, frat parties. College stuff.”

  “Oh,” I said, relieved by his answer.

  The seafood stand was really great. It was just a little hole-in-the-wall place with a couple of tables and chairs pulled up under a makeshift tin roof. The patio that it created could be screened in or closed up depending on the weather. It was the kind of place I imagined Kelly and Brett eating at right alongside the beach in California. It was out of the way and quiet, really peaceful. When they brought our food, it was in those little red-and-white plastic baskets with a piece of wax paper in the bottom.

  “So how do you like it?” Zack asked, waiting for my reaction.

  “I love it. I’m really glad you brought me here. Thank you.”

  Zack gave me a big smile as he picked up another shrimp and tossed it in his mouth.

  “Well, if you like this, I have another surprise for you after dinner.” His smile was so wide now that I could have counted every one of his perfectly shaped white teeth.

  “Do I get a hint?” I begged, a little flirtatiously.

  “No, not this time. But I think you’ll like it. I have to confess, though, it wasn’t all my idea. Caleb thought you’d enjoy it.”

  “Caleb? Why would Caleb tell you where to take me?”