Sex and the Confession Box

by M. H. O'Hara

  Eileen’s Story Meeting the EX

  Wake-up mummy wake up straining to open one eye Eileen smiled at her little son, good morning wee man, she said grabbing him and giving him a big bear hug and they began their tickling game, she love to him laugh it was just contagious and they laughed and played under the covers of the bed. So what’s for breakfast this morning toasties Waffles ? How about toast and chocolate spread? OK he said jumping of the bed up to the living room to the applause of the dogs who to wanted breakfast doddering up behind him and unlocking the front door to let the fluffy folk do their business outside I went into the living room and open the curtains to a day another day, sunny and inviting me to embrace it instead I felt the dread of what the postman might bring and picked up the phone receiver to check if was still working and if Peter had maybe left a message on the machine, perhaps he rang late and she hadn’t heard it ring. You have no messages and no life! Hats not what it said that’s what went through her pumping head. One bottle of wine she could handle but nearly two time to reach for the aspirin. Chocolate toast for James and lemon tea for me, flush out some of the alcohol. Eileen busied herself with getting her sons lunch ready for school and fed the dogs. She got ready pulling on her favourite jeans that even on fat days fitted and a vest top and jacket and made the short walk with dogs in tow to the school. James loved it and or now it was only for a few hours nine am until two pm. give her a break. No kisses just straight in and back up the road walking into a nearby field she often used to let the dogs go free run about a bit. She thought about Doreen’s call last night stomach turning over, going back to that place for an hour never mind a few days just seemed like something she couldn’t do. The night with Clarke how taken so much energy so much of who she was, she felt herself disappearing. What a fool she heard herself say, still waiting to be rescued, but I was I am Peter will come. I already worked out the £1,500 to pay some of mortgage arrears and that month’s mortgage plus food and electric and then what.

  I had a CCJ order for the house and a date for court unless she cleared the arrears she’d be homeless. She wanted to crumbled to fall on her knees and cry but hadn’t she done that enough hadn’t she fell enough and no one reached out to catch her. Once more she was her own saviour and she had to accept that he wasn’t coming, once more she had to kiss herself better and hide the bruises that life had brought her and cover up the pain and shame of just not being all that was expected or hoped or dreamed. Would she ever feel good enough?

  Back at the house she looked at the bottle of red wine and wanted to just drink what was left in the bottle but she couldn’t go back to James school smelling of drink later first reality calls. She picked up the phone and called Doreen after a few ring s it picked up Hello Hi! Doreen its she nearly said Eileen she .d done that a few times, it’s Kara, oh hi! She said sounding genuinely happy to hear from her I can do those days for you. Really oh great hone that’s wonderful news, now it won’t be where you came for your interview it’s our Lagan side apartments we have great clientele there you won’t be let down and expect to be busy so bring plenty of condoms. Did you get any nice outfits she asked me, matter of fact, yes I did I got some nice underwear, well bring it all with you she said now take down this address, scribbling down the address and number, I thanked Doreen and hung up. Holding the paper in my hand I knew those apartments they were so beautiful I used to drive by my ex and think how lucky they were to live there, all overlooking the lagan side river and all with big windows for amazing views. Never imagined actually owning one never mind there being a brothel in such a classy place like that amazing, the saying no one knows what goes on behind closed doors brought new meaning now.

  Where will she pull the strength from to do this, for James yes but would she begin to resent him for it. If she had no child she could just walk away from the house the mortgage it wouldn’t matter, her soon to be not soon enough ex-husband seemed to have no trouble in walking away not just from a house he once helped to pay for and own, but he could walk away from his only child (that she knew of anyhow) who’s knows with him, He could leave James and her. The wine founds its way into a glass and she sat on the edge of the sofa and thought back to when she met him.

  Daniel, she and her sister Clare had went to Dublin for three days for Clare’s birthday she was turning nineteen two years younger than Eileen so Dublin it was, Eileen had just broken up with her long time childhood sweetheart of six years so now was a good time to remember what it was like to date again and have some fun. They both booked themselves into “The Darby O Gill hotel” a new hotel that had opened in Dublin and was doing a great three day summer deal that they grabbed. Arriving first by train then by taxi from the station, they were impressed it was a lovely hotel, they confirmed their reservation and were shown to their room, very stylish chic interior not one of those Irish hotels ,cool and crispy with twin beds. They freshened their make-up and headed into Dublin the first time being here as grown-ups and without any parents or grandparents the pubs awaited. There was a summer jazz festival on so they made their way to that and it was great, the atmosphere the music, they sat on the grass drinking cider and felt so grown up and sophisticated. Then they took a dander around the shops to have a wee noisy for any bargains then Dublin hadn’t joined the euros so they sterling was worth so much more and they got a lot for their money. Clare was heading off to university in Liverpool beginning of September to do an art degree so this was a time for them to bond and let loose. Eileen was working as a glamour model and making tons of money which she saved a lot of ands spent a lot of, it had all happened by chance and she loved the life it was bringing her so this weekend was her birthday present to Clare. Clare and Eileen had completely different looks, while Eileen was slim, slender and a petite 5, 5 and a half, Clare was very tall at five foot ten and bigger boned with a lovely blonde hair cut in a chopped shape around her round face with great blue eyes like their dads. It wasn’t until the next morning when they had ordered breakfast in their room as hung over of course that Eileen would first fatefully meet Daniel. He was the waiter bringing them their lovely breakfast being two young when the door wrapped for breakfast and they spied through the keyhole that it was an attractive guy they panicked and fought over who would open the door, Eileen lost as Clare ran into the bathroom before her and locked the door so she had no choice but to open the door without make-up on oh for shame! He said a jovial good moving in that Irish accent and asked where to place the tray, Eileen wearing stripped Jamie bottoms and a Jamie bra top was helpful but uncomfortable not that it showed. He began putting down the plates etc. and she got out a pound tip to act all grown up and he asked what they thought of Dublin and they chatted during which time her wee bitch sister had made herself up and came out all glam we explained here for Clare’s birthday and he told us of a few clubs. Thanking him and trying to get him out the door so we could eat we agreed to check them out. We gobbled down the massive fry breakfast and they were not mean with the goodies. We talked and laughed about how he was eyeing us both up and didn’t give him another thought until less than twenty minutes later the hotels phone rang and wondering who it could be for a second then both dashing to answer again Clare won well she was taller than I gave her the edge. She handed it to me it’s for you, she covered the mouthpiece saying it’s that waiter, the waiter yea asking for you ,she shrugged and gave me the phone ”Hello” I said hello is everything ok I asked, I just wanted to know if you’d like to go out with me while your here? I was pretty taken aback I didn’t remember flirting that much and also I had no make-up on and still he wanted to take me out. Interesting but then even then he just wasn’t for me and I said no thank you he took it well and finished with well maybe IL bump into you at one of those clubs yea sure I said, bye and hung up. Clare said did he just ask you out yea, he loves himself she said I agreed and again I never thought about him again until incidentally he just happened to be at one of the clubs he told us about which we did check out and was really gr
eat all cocktails only a £1 and wed had at least eight each by the time he strutted over alone! Hello he said fancy meeting you two here we both just nodded up to him and said hi! You of work then as he invited himself to sit at our table, yea swapped with a mate who needed a favour right. Clare piped in annoyed as with him there he would be stopping all the guys coming over and we had our eyes on a few, “who you with” she asked bluntly. Oh I’m by myself really we both said ”Norman no mates is it” laughing no he said looking embarrassed I know loads of people I always bump into lots of friends when I’m out I play for Dublin City Football team we just weren’t impressed and he didn’t get the response he expected or hoped. For the rest of the evening he hung around and we keep giving him the bums rush but he was like a cold sore he lingered. End of the evening or early morning we hailed a taxi back to the hotel and dies till the afternoon, everywhere we went he was there or he always seemed to be the one bringing us our room service. Last day paying bill and checking out he appeared behind the desk to the annoyance of the receptionist Cathy what do you want Daniel she asked just checking my work rota he said, and oh hi didn’t see you there that sort of crap you leaving yes that’s right I said. I was impressed by his persistence and he was attractive, with long brownish hair with a slight kink that just brushed of his china goatee and nice brown eyes, I just wasn’t wanting this guy in my face trying to enjoy single life a bit. Walking towards Clare where she awaited by the door with our bags for our taxi to the train station she nodded her head to behind me and it was him again running up behind me I just wanted to give you this he said holding out a piece of paper which when I opened it, it had his number and address on ok thank you. Just in case you’re in Dublin again he said thank you and he leaned in to kiss me and I pulled back, way back like what are you doing. Bye I said and turned towards my awaiting taxi and said to Clare here he wants you to have this and she said no thanks and threw it out the taxi window, something about him gives me the creeps, yea I know to Bundy. If I only stuck to that gut feeling god only know how things would be today, but as you know I didn’t and they’re a mess and yes it’s down to him

  Peter’s Story

  CHAPTER 11

  The bishop lived in an amazing Victorian style house in Down Patrick it was his home and offices .Father O Kane parked in the large driveway and locked up the car he’d hadn’t realised but he’d have no car in a matter of days as this was the property of the church came with the job. No matter he’d but himself a new one, a family one once he cleared out his bank accounts in Donegal god only knows what the balance is now the last time he looked was when he’d sold his parents farm and put all the blood money in an account there then walked away he’d moved around from so many parishes that he never bothered to keep telling the bank and any statements that came he just threw in the trash what use was it to him then. But now he could save a life a real life with these saving, stop Eileen form degrading herself, a woman like that should never have to go to that life, he was looking forward to looking after her, James and spoiling them both. His father’s money was going to do some good and he was sure that he’d be happy about that. He spoke to the bishops secretary and confirmed his appointment with her for this morning and she said that the bishop was expecting him and offered him a cup of coffee which he gladly accepted he hadn’t felt nervous or excited until he took the coffee cup and it began to tremble just then did he realise just what he was doing. It smacked him right in the face and he dropped the cup and saucer and all and it crashed onto the floor leaving a mess of crockery and a warm wash of brown coffee and it woke him up. He ran outside and breathed in the air deeply holey Jesus was he ready for what was coming, could he go through with this really. Had the past few days just been a pipe dream? His head swam ,could he save this woman when him himself was so damaged what if his father’s demons were inside him and dear god he ever hurt or struck her was he sure he was himself and not his father was he so sure he could be a father to a child he hadn’t even met.

  What if it didn’t work and she couldn’t love him be with him, then where would he go who would he beheld have nothing, no holy family and no real family. Father he heard behind him are you alright? There’s no need to worry about the cup it’s not good china or anything, father he turned to see the kind secretary looking at him with a worried and puzzled expression on her face. Would you like another cup of coffee or a glass of water? A glass of water he managed to faintly say, please if you’d be so kind. She hurried of in the direction of the kitchen and he came back in and sat down and breathed in and out. Sometimes that’s all you can do is breath.

  Eileen’s Story

  Eileen rang the buzzer, the voice on the other line said hello Kara push the door and come in first she wondered how Doreen knew it had been her then she saw the security camera, maybe that was in all the apartments or just the brothels. It was stunning she imagined herself living here with her stockbroker boyfriend the high life her own beauty spa, she’d trained for one year as a beauty therapist at college then left to pursue the modelling full time, amazing money and so much excitement who would want to stay on for another two years of studying and she knew chances like this barely came twice so she grabbed with both hands. No regrets at all but still she could dream of owning her own spa. Doreen came out to greet her in a flowing emerald green velvet gown with high heel’s on and a very sexy dress. Eileen was taken aback you waiting on a date no hone I was preparing myself to work today. Work? Well yes I wasn’t a hundred per cent sure you’d be able to go thought with it, don’t be offended I always have a second plan of action. Well you look amazing, she was at least fifty two but could be taken for ten years younger than that. Shoot me down dead if I’m having to still do this at her age never mind in another month god how does she do it? In side I walked straight over to the huge windows and looked out at the amazing view of the river lagan it was spectacular. The whole apartment was like something out of a show house, stunning white linen sofa which wouldn’t last ten seconds in my house scattered with all green cushions and throws, bare floorboards and crisp white lilies at every corner of the room, the bathroom came complete with a Jacuzzi bath and shower, and the work bedroom was a basic bare room with powder lemon walls and a huge king-size bed covered with satin white sheet and a huge towel on the middle of the bed that made it look so tacky, near the window with the blinds half drawn even though there’s no way in hell anyone could see them from this height there was a long wooden mirror full length. Doreen rang her hands up and down the full length of the mirror I keep getting asked for mirrors on the ceiling which is impossible as we rent these places and I’ve yet to come to any property that has any, so I thought the next best thing if they want to watch themselves fucking this should do it.

  Great idea I said grimacing as I was the one who would be getting fucked today. In my head I Wanted to make money but I just prayed no one would come then I could say well I tried and I didn’t let Doreen down she’d know she could trust me despite the fact ID stolen the hotel client Clarke. Why don’t you go and get changed Kara and IL switch the phone on and we can start making some real money today. I went into the bedroom some of the English girls would sleep in, next to the work room, just a plain room with a single bed, the bed had been stripped and by the sound of the washer in the kitchen being washed. There was a dresser with drawers and an oval mirror in the wardrobe there was a smaller selection of outfits that had been at the house on the Malone road and a dressing gown, good ID forgot to bring one of those’ll changed into my black lace Basque with attached suspenders pulled on my black lace barely there G-string and hoped ID not have to take it off isn’t denial a wonderful thing! Rolled on the ten denier stockings up my soft white legs and clipped them into the suspenders and slipped into my black killer heels with a dusting of silver around the bottom. Put on the robe which smelt of hundred girls perfumes and checked my slap in the mirror and I was all set for a day of debauchery. NOT! Back in with Doreen she was all smiles and had changed
into a pair of loose fitting trousers and a nice wee purple blouse. Poured you a coffee hone, the phone rang and I heard her in her drawling sexy voice give out this description of the girl who was there to please today, when she hung up who was that you were describing you of course. You made me sound like something out of a playboy magazine, well you’re close to that and besides it’s good to get their imaginations pumping that and the blood flowing fast to their cocks gets them here, ill teach you how to use the phone in case you have to ever do it alone. God no I said ID never work alone I could get raped, despite of what you think the whole time I.ve been working it rarely happens, it never gets that far, but yes there are incidents and it is always better to have an extra person hear for protection and also while you’re working the other girl can still take bookings or it means you’re having to take the phone of the hook every time you’re doing a punter and then you’re missing money, you don’t answer they will just call another number. Curiously I asked well how many are there in Belfast well she said passing me the sport newspaper as of today’s listings there are seven brothels in total across Northern Ireland four in Belfast two of which are mine the other to well one is a woman who works on her own has regular clientele the other one is run by two guys not very pleasant and are not the sort of guys you want to work for they don’t play nice and have no respect for the girls or treat them well.