Masters of My Desire

by Jenna Jacobs

  You know what to do. Focus and listen.

  Even my inner voice was on high alert. I knew to trust my feelings and they were blaring out a warning. Someone was in my apartment. It was too dark for me to tell where the burglar was hiding. If the thief was thinking about absconding with my jewelry box, he wasn’t going to make it past me. The only memento I had left of my mother was her wedding necklace. I’d never let him get past me.

  Behind me, a car horn honked. I glanced without thinking . When I swiveled my head back to the apartment’s doorway, I narrowed my eyes, trying to peer through the inky darkness. Suddenly, a blurred figure rushed from the shadows. Strong hands gripped my arms and before I knew what was happening, I was shoved against the coat closet door. Now swallowed into the dark abyss, I was unable to see my attackers face.

  Crying out in alarm, I bent my wrist and aimed the mace. I squeezed my eyes and pressed the button. The robber began to scream. He released my arms then covered his face with his hands. Feral curses blended with his cries of agony. As I stepped away from the wall, I watched him bend at the waist. Spinning in circles, the asshat tried to escape the fiery burn.

  “Get on the ground, mother fucker, or I’ll blow your balls off.” I prayed he was too incapacitated to realize I wasn’t holding a gun, but simply bluffing. “Do you hear me, asswipe? I said get your ass on--”

  A second pair of beefy arms wrapped me from behind and squeezed tightly. I was pinned and helpless against a wide chest. Son of a bitch! They were working as a pair. It pissed me off. I didn’t hazard to think there might be two burglars.

  “Stop!” The prick that had me immobilized growled on the back of my neck.

  Thinking fast, I let my body grow lax in his arms. I waited and prayed he’d loosen his hold—as I’d been trained. And the dumbshit did it. I clenched my teeth and sucked in a breath.

  “I don’t think so, fuck face,” I spat as I wrenched from his arms. Balancing my weight on one leg, I spun in the air, and with a round-house kick, I clipped the big bastard on the side of his head. With a howling yell, he fell to the ground like a mighty oak.

  Unwilling to stay and see if any more goons were waiting in the wings, I turned and began to sprint toward the door.

  “Savannah! Wait!” Came a roar from the man still fisting his burning eyes.

  My heart clutched. I froze like a statue. I knew that voice.

  Dylan.

  “Oh God. Oh Shit. No. No.” I spun around and raced to him. I bent and found his face crumpled in pain. “What the fuck are you doing here? Is that…Oh, God. Nick!” I cried as I rushed to the body still sprawled out on my living room floor.

  “I’m going to get the goddamn soap and I’m going to make you eat the whole fucking bar, girl.” Nick growled as he slowly sat up, rubbing the side of his face.

  “Ohmigod! Ohmigod! I’m so sorry,” I moaned. “Why did you grab me? How did you get in here? Why are you two here?” I screeched.

  “Help!” Dylan cried out. “I can’t see a fucking thing. Christ this shit burns!”

  Rushing back to Dylan’s side, I gripped his elbow and led him into the kitchen. Flipping on the light, I began helping him flush his eyes with cool water.

  “Just keep rinsing, I’ll be right back,” I instructed then raced out of the kitchen to check on Nick.

  He was sitting on my couch, holding his cheek and glaring at me as if I’d grown an extra head.

  “Where did you learn to fight like that, little one?”

  A weak smile wobbled over my lips. “Karate class,” I confessed as I snagged my purse and bag of groceries off the welcome mat before I shut the door. I pulled back the curtains, flooding the room with light.

  Nick looked like hell. I looked at the worried lines around his eyes as I nervously nibbled my bottom lip. “I thought you were burglars or rapists. I didn’t know it was…why are you here?”

  “Go check on Dylan. Do you have some ice?”

  “Yes, come on.” I replied as I rushed to his side and helped him stand.

  “I can walk, girl. I don’t know if I’ll be able to eat for a month, but I can walk.”

  “Oh, Nick, I’m so sorry. If I’d known it was you…”

  “It’s Master or Sir, goddammit. You’ve obviously forgotten how to address us and how to say good-fucking-bye,” Nick thundered.

  “But…I…thought,” I stammered, peeking up at him beneath my lashes. He wore that glorious, disapproving dominant scowl. “Yes, Sir.”

  Butterflies set sail in my stomach. I wrapped my slender arm around his waist and led him into the kitchen before helping him sit at the table.

  “How are you doing, Sir?” I asked rushing back to the sink, smoothing a palm over Dylan’s broad back.

  “Better. Fuck, this shit is wicked.”

  “I’m so sorry, Dylan, Sir. I didn’t know it was…”

  “It’s okay, kitten. I’m just proud as hell that you can take care of yourself.”

  “Easy for you to say,” Nick grumbled. “She didn’t break your jaw.”

  “Oh God! I broke your jaw?” I gasped in terror.

  “No, but it sure fucking feels like it,” he groused.

  I dug through the freezer and found a squishy gel ice pack. Wrapping it in a towel, I tenderly pried Nick’s fingers away then placed the cold pack against his face.

  “I can’t apologize enough, Sirs. If I’d known it was you two, I never would have reacted that way. I thought you were here to rob or hurt me.”

  “So you didn’t just kick our asses for fun?” he chortled.

  “Never, Sir. Why are you two here?” I asked as my head swiveled between the two like a metronome.

  “Why are you here and not back at the barn, little one?” Nick challenged, his brows slashed in an angry scowl.

  Averting his gaze, I placed a clean kitchen towel in Dylan’s hands.

  “Let me tell you how surprised--no, surprised is too tame. Let me tell you how blindsided we were when we came back early to discover not only that you were gone, but left nothing but a fucking note behind,” Nick hissed. The veins in his neck bulged and his face turned a deep crimson.

  I’d never heard Nick sound so infuriated, not even that day when I woke and heard him talking to George about his skanky ex-wife. “Christ. The Christmas cards from my accountant contain more heartfelt sentiments than the kiss-off note you left us.”

  Guilt and fear exploded through my veins as I watched Nick pluck the note from the pocket of his jeans. With a scowl, he begin to read.

  “Dear Sirs, thank you so much for a memorable week. I will fondly treasure our time together. Sincerely yours, Savannah.” Nick tossed the paper onto the table as if it were on fire. “If you were sincerely ours, girl, your ass would have been in bed when we got back, like you’d promised. But sincerely you weren’t. Is this tripe you wrote how you really feel about us? Or is it another smoke screen to hide what you truly feel?”

  I had no idea how to answer his question, except to tell the truth, and I wasn’t ready to do that. Luckily, Nick didn’t give me a chance to respond before resuming his tirade.

  “That’s what you were doing this morning before we left, isn’t it, pet? Blowing smoke up our asses and feeding us some bullshit story about a goddamn dream? I gotta tell you, Savannah, you had me fooled. I honestly believed you. You looked right into my eyes and lied straight to my face.”

  Nick stood. Fury rolled off him in a potent wave. I inched back until my butt bumped up against the countertop.

  “I’m sorry,” I whispered. I felt myself shrinking inside.

  “No, girl. I want an answer. Not a goddamn apology!” Nick slammed his fist onto the table. “Is this--this glacial shit you wrote the only thing you feel for us?” His lips curled in an angry snarl as his eyes bore into mine.

  Tears welled and spilled down my cheeks. I couldn’t speak because I couldn’t swallow the lump of pain, and anguish lodged in, my throat. I shook my head in a silent ‘No.’

&nbs
p; “Finally, we’re getting somewhere,” Nick crossed his arms over his wide chest. His dangerous were all but peeling my flesh to the bone.

  Dylan turned off the water and dried his face with the towel. He wrapped his hand around my elbow and led me to the table.

  “Sit down, kitten.”

  Oh great. It was time for tag-team inquisition. I sat down, steeling myself for the onslaught of humiliation to squash me like an unwelcome cockroach.

  “Do you know why we cut our hunting trip so short, kitten?” Dylan asked. His beautiful blue eyes were bloodshot and rimmed red.

  I glanced back at Nick with the ice pack to his swollen cheek. A sob eked from my lips. I’d done that to them. I’d inflicted pain on the two men who meant the world to me.

  “No, Sir.” I blubbered.

  “You have no idea why we rushed back to the barn?” Nick asked in disbelief.

  “No, Sir,” I wailed.

  “Come on Dylan, let’s go,” Nick announced in a defeated tone.

  I sat there stunned. Nick and Dylan turned and began to walk toward the door.

  “Wait!” I screamed as I bolted from my chair. “Don’t go!”

  They stopped and turned. Their blistering dominance infused me in a hot wave as they stared at me. Their veiled eyes were dull and lifeless.

  “You’re going to leave because I don’t know the answer to your question?” I sobbed. “What do you want from me?”

  “Obviously something you’re no longer willing to give.” Nick’s tone was arctic.

  “What? Are you talking about my submission?” I rounded the table.

  “Stop,” Dylan barked.

  I froze. My heart pounded in a combination of panic and confusion. Nick’s eyes narrowed in penetrating appraisal. Crossing his arms over his broad chest, his lips thinned to a tight angry line.

  “Strip,” Nick suddenly commanded.

  “What?” I gasped.

  “Oh, little one. Do. Not. Make. Me. Repeat. It. You think for one fucking second the rules have changed just because we’re on your turf?”

  “No, Sir,” I whispered, shaking my head wildly.

  In perfect synchronization, they squared their shoulders, clasped their hands behind their backs and gazed at me with impatient expressions. Power blasted of them in a formidable wave. They wore their command like sleek, expensive suits and I melted like spun sugar.

  I’d been a fool to think I could survive without this…without them in my life. Why had they come all this way? Were they seeking some type of kinky closure? And what if they turned and walked out the door…now?

  I would lose my mind.

  The sun beamed through the wide window, casting a halo around their formidable bodies. They looked like angels but their expressions were born of the devil. Angry jaws ticked in irritation. Their bodies were stiff and unyielding as they waited for me to satisfy their demand.

  My fingers trembled as I began to unbutton my blouse. Movement at the window drew my attention. My heart slammed against my ribs as my neighbor passed by. I was thankful he wasn’t paying attention to me disrobing in my living room. But what if another neighbor passed by, one not as focused, who might glance through the large picture window? I would die a thousand deaths if they spied me stripping. Surely the guys didn’t expect me to take off my clothes with the curtains wide open… did they?

  “Can I please close the drapes, Sirs?” I asked in a timid voice.

  “No,” Dylan replied in a cold tone. “It’s now or never, kitten. Make up your mind and do it quick.”

  Dylan’s unusual demeanor frightened me. My assumptions of them being relieved had been way off target. All this time, I thought absolving them from the burden of training me would make them happy. But I could see—up close and personal—there wasn’t a happy bone in their bodies.

  As I began to unbutton my shirt once more, my entire body trembled. Anxiety of a neighbor catching glimpse of my naked body was almost debilitating but I pressed forward, determined to make them proud.

  As my clothing fell away, the barriers I’d been reassembling since I’d left the barn began to crumble beneath my feet. That strange, calm serenity began to fill me. I felt as if I’d been brought back to life beneath their command, once again.

  When I stepped out of my jeans, I inhaled a deep breath. Casting my eyes toward the floor, I settled to my knees near the kitchen table. An audible sigh wafted from Dylan’s direction. I longed to raise my eyes and gauge their expressions, aching to see if I had pleased them, but I remained fixed in my proper position as a formidable silence dragged on and on. Sweat broke out over my upper lip and a tremor skittered through my body.

  Please don’t leave. Please don’t leave. Please don’t leave.

  I sensed movement, but it was ebbing backward. Fear gripped my heart in a tight fist. Tears filled my eyes as silent sobs shook my body. Whatever they’d come for, whatever test they’d just doled out, I had obviously failed.

  The sound of air escaping the cushions of my leather couch lit a flame of with hope within. They hadn’t left. They had only sat down. Still, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I wasn’t out of the woods yet. Warring between keeping my gaze on the floor or risk a peek at their glorious faces, submission won over desire. Pissed or not, they completed me in ways I couldn’t fathom.

  Emotions whirred, but breaking through the chaos like a beacon of light, there was hope. Luminous hope of possibly spending one more poignant day blanketed in their Dominance. Self-preservation flew out the window. Caution, common sense and logic were hot on its heels. All the heartbreak in the universe would be worth just one more day of feeling whole again. Tears streamed down my face.

  “Raise your head, little one,” Nick demanded in a low, controlled tone.

  I inhaled a deep breath then slowly lifted my chin to find both of them seated on the couch, legs spread, elbows on their knees, with matching hunger in their eyes. I swallowed tightly and waited the interminable seconds before Nick finally broke the silence.

  “Crawl to us, girl.”

  His order replayed in my mind—twice. They expected me crawl on the floor, like a damn dog. My knee-jerk reaction was to tell him to go to hell. I wasn’t about to crawl to him or anyone. I may have tossed caution to the wind for the chance of one more day, but I wasn’t about to throw away my pride. Thankfully, it dawned on me that this was a test, a big one, before I opened my mouth to tell Nick where he could shove his demand.

  I drove my swell of humiliation down deep then positioned myself on all fours. The first slide of my knee was the hardest and I choked back a sob of shame as I forced my body to advance. With each glide of my knees, I shoved past my pride and groped for the threads of my tattered submission.

  “Head up. Eyes on us, kitten,” Dylan commanded, his voice still lacking his usual warmth.

  When I raised my head, the unveiled window flashed like a neon of dread. I faltered for a moment then clenched my teeth, determined to see the lesson through.

  “Move your ass, pet. You’re trying what little patience we have left,” Nick growled.

  If this isn’t a test, you can throw them out. My inner voice railed it in defense of my ego. I issued a small nod, not at Nick’s caustic tone, but to my own subconscious as it dealt with their derisive edict.

  I gazed into their approving stares. A strange myriad of emotions thrummed within. Anger. Debasement. Servitude. Embarrassment. Arousal. Fear. Contentment. None of it made a lick of sense as I continued to crawl toward them like an animal. As I neared their splayed-out legs, Nick leaned forward, threading his massive fingers into my hair, stinging my scalp. A cry fluttered in the back of my throat as I stared up at him.

  “Good girl. You may kneel up now.” Those two words made my heart soar even though Nick’s voice was cold and detached, void of his usual whiskey smooth timbre.

  Releasing my hair, he turned to Dylan. “Can you close the curtains? We’ll need her total attention for this discussion.”

&nbs
p; “Yes, we will,” Dylan agreed with a solemn nod before he stood and jerked the drapes shut.

  Relieved that no one could gawk at my naked body did little to soothe my pricked nerves. Nick turned on the lamp next to the couch, bathing the room in a soft glow. As Dylan sat back down, he reached out and cupped my chin. With the broad pad of his thumbs, he wiped the tears from my cheeks and issued a heavy sigh. His jaw ticked as he released my face.

  “Trust is very fragile. Once broken, it’s hard to mend. Don’t you agree?” Nick asked in a deep authoritative tone.

  “Yes, Sir. I’m sorry.” I offered in earnest.

  “Don’t give me another fucking apology, girl. Give me the goddamn truth. For once, just give me the truth.” His eyes narrowed.

  “I’ll give all the truth I have, Sir.”

  “Let’s hope you do, girl. Let’s hope you finally do.” He speared me with a look of disapproval so intense, I felt it to my bones. “Why did you run away from us this morning?”

  My heart picked up as my palms grew moist. “I didn’t want you to know that I’d made a mistake.”

  “A mistake?” Dylan asked in a seething tone. “You think the time we shared was a fucking mistake?”

  “No, Sir,” I amended quickly. “I meant that I’d made a mistake.”

  “Go on,” Nick prompted.

  “I did a stupid and foolish thing.” I swallowed tightly. I hated being forced to spill my guts. “With my heart, Sirs.”

  My gaze darted between them. I grew more confused as their expressions softened and slow smiles spread over their lips.

  “What happened to your heart, little one?” Nick asked softly.

  “I lost it, Sir. To both of you,” I confessed, then waited for them to burst into hysterical laughter and chastise me for being so damn pathetic.

  “So you fell in love with us, is that what you’re saying?” Dylan pressed.

  My heart resonated like a bass drum in my ears. I nodded and lowered my head, swamped with embarrassment.

  Nick’s palm cradled my chin, forcing my gaze to his. Searching my eyes, he issued a heavy, sigh. “Did you ever happen to think that maybe we’d fallen in love with you too, little one?”