Starr Fated

by G E Griffin

  Of course. He was worried about his precious designs.

  “I’ve already said you’ll have all the designs first thing on Monday morning, haven’t I?” I replied frostily. So now he doubted my word?

  “Good,” he smiled in relief. “So, is there anything I can do to help? Anything I can get you?”

  “No, I’m fine.” He clearly couldn’t wait to see the back of me, and was willing to offer assistance in order to speed things along.

  “I see. Look, I hate leaving you alone, but I really should go and check on Jamie.”

  “That’s fine, you go. To be honest, I’d really rather just be left alone right now,” I smiled weakly at him.

  “Okay. But please keep in touch, and if you need help, in any way at all, don’t hesitate to ask. And for what it’s worth, I'm really sorry how things turned out, and I’m truly ashamed of how appallingly my brother behaved towards you.” He was obviously pissed at having to get involved in this messy business between Jamie and me.

  “Forget about it. That’s all I want to do, just move on and put it all behind me.” I stood up and opened the door to encourage him to leave. “Oh, if you’re headed to the hotel, perhaps you’d drop this back to the security guy who lent it to me? I think he said his name was Kevin.” I handed him the fleece.

  “You didn't even have your coat when you left?” he asked, as he stared on the marks on my arms from where Jamie had held me down. I just shrugged. You work it out. I ran out before Jamie could grab me again. Then I watched him get up and hopefully walk out of my life for good.

  ~*~

  Once Liam had gone, I slowly got undressed, but my mind was in such turmoil that I knew I was never going to be able to sleep. The more I thought about escaping to Ireland, the more appealing it became, and so I decided I might as well get on with finalising all my design work, both for Starr Capital, and for university. So I worked through the night until I was satisfied I had everything done.

  Abbey rang me back the following morning, full of apologies for not getting back to me sooner. I stopped her when she tried to tell me the finer details of what she’d been up to that had kept her so busily occupied, because I really did not want to know any of the gory details of her sex life. But her delay in getting back to me meant I’d had time to rethink my plans, after making a couple of phone calls and spending some time online.

  “So, how was your night with Jamie? Come on, spill all the juicy details. Did it live up to expectations?”

  “Not really. In fact it was a total disaster, but I don’t want to talk about it.”

  “Oh, Sera, no! What on earth happened? When we talked this through, you seemed so certain things were going to work out with Jamie. Does this have anything to do with Liam?” she asked suspiciously.

  I sighed to myself. I really wished she hadn't witnessed what had happened between Liam and me at the club. It was an added complication I could well do without.

  “No, don’t be ridiculous. Of course it doesn’t,” I lied.

  “I don’t believe you. You can bury your head in the sand if you like, but I know what I saw. There was undeniable chemistry between you and Liam. Something’s going on between you two, isn’t it?”

  “No, most definitely not, you’ve got it all wrong, Abbey. Look, like I said I really don’t want to talk about any of this. I’ve just got a couple of huge favours to ask of you,” I pleaded.

  “Hmm. I know you're keeping something from me, and trust me, I will get to the bottom of this at some point,” she insisted. “But go ahead. I know you wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important. What do you need?”

  I knew I rarely asked her for favours.

  “Seeing as I’ve got all my course work finished ahead of schedule, I thought I’d head over to spend a bit of time with my Gran in Ireland. I rang her earlier, and she’s over the moon about it. I can get a flight this afternoon, so I was hoping you’d drop my completed course work in at uni for me tomorrow,” I explained.

  “You’re going away? This is all a bit sudden, isn’t it?” she asked suspiciously.

  “Not really. I’ve been wanting to go for some time, and with the extra money I earned working at Starr Capital, I’ve decided I should just do it. Gran is not as young as she was, and I feel bad that I haven’t seen her for so long. So will you help? If I hand it over to you later this morning, will you drop my course work in on Monday for me?”

  “You know I will,” she agreed.

  “And I’ve got one other favour.”

  “Spit it out.”

  “Could you drop my final design work into the Starr Capital offices on Monday morning as well? I’d do it myself, but of course they aren’t open on Sundays, and it seems a shame to delay my travel plans when it’s just a case of dropping a folder off. It’s all ready, all you’d have to do is hand it in at the reception desk. Their offices aren’t that far from uni and dead easy to find. Pretty please?” I practically begged her.

  “Well, seeing as you're my best friend, I suppose I’ll have to do this for you, even though your holding out on me. I think it sounds like you’re avoiding a certain someone, but I can tell you're not going to open up about it. Maybe when you come back you’ll be ready to talk. How long are you planning to be away for?”

  “I’m not sure yet. It depends if I get a place on the exchange program. Otherwise, I was thinking of maybe relocating to Dublin, or even Cork, if I could find a job over there once I’ve graduated. Then I'd be a lot nearer to my family.”

  “Really? Well I suppose I can understand that would be cool for you, after being on your own for so long, but are there many suitable jobs that’d you’d be interested in over there?” I could hear the sceptical tone in Abbey’s voice.

  “I have no idea, to be honest. That’s what I need to look into,” I explained. Up to now, I’d always imagined I'd get a job here in London once I graduated, but the idea of a fresh start somewhere else was becoming more appealing by the minute.

  “Okay, why don’t I come over in my car to pick all your things up, and then drive you to the airport? Where are you going from?”

  That’s what I loved about Abbey. She was such a good friend that even though she may not have bought into my whole relocating to be near my family story, none the less she was prepared to help me out.

  “Heathrow. That would be really great if you could, Abbey. I’ll really owe you big time.”

  And so that was how I found myself on Aer Lingus flight EI713 out of Heathrow bound for Cork that afternoon.

  Chapter 18

  Liam

  It was with great difficulty that I forced myself to keep a hold on my temper all the time I was with Seraphina, but she looked so vulnerable and upset that I knew I had to keep calm for her sake. The last thing she needed was me ranting and raving uncontrollably about the way my brother had acted towards her. But I was enraged by his behaviour. If it had been anyone other than him, I would have fucking killed the bastard who attempted to force himself on her.

  What was really eating at me was the fact that Jamie had told me he’d acted that way because he thought that was how I treated women. He’d only been following my example, apparently. Sure, I remember telling him that women like a man to take control, but for fucks sake surely he realised I didn’t mean it was okay to try and force a woman when she was screaming at him to stop? I knew he’d seen some of the sex toys I like to play around with sometimes - nothing too extreme, just a few spankophilia items, but I’ve only ever used those with a woman’s full consent, if they were into that kind of play too.

  Was this all my fault? I’d always thought I was setting such a positive role model for Jamie, but now I was left wondering just what kind of an example I had set my little brother. He clearly thought I used physical force to overpower women against their will to get what I wanted, which was certainly not the case and horrified me. Surely he understood that a woman always has the right to call a halt to things? Safe, sane and fully consensual – surely I had d
rummed that mantra into him countless times, along with all my other advice about safe sex and always using a condom. Had I really given him the impression that women were purely objects used to fulfil a man’s sexual urges?

  And another thing. I felt thoroughly ashamed of my whole treatment of Seraphina before I'd got to know her. Until I’d met her for myself and realised she wasn’t the gold digger I’d decided she was, I’d assumed her sole aim was to get her claws into Jamie as her meal ticket. I'd behaved appallingly towards her when she was truly the last person to deserve it.

  Because of my cynical attitude, she must have spent the winter living in a freezing cold room, without even a decent supply of hot water for the shower. Yet with one quick phone call and just a few meagre pounds that I certainly wouldn’t have missed, it could have all been so easily sorted out. Seraphina hadn't even complained either. She’d just quietly worked her socks off to make ends meet, while she studied far harder than the average student, certainly much harder than my lazy brother.

  What had happened to me? When had I become the kind of man who totally lacked any kind of compassion? Somehow, I’d lost all my basic decency and humanity somewhere along the way while I'd concentrated all my energies on building up a highly profitable business. What kind of a man had I become? I didn't like the answer to that question when I started to see myself through Seraphina’s eyes.

  I’d really wanted to talk to her and explain things, but as she’d just been nearly raped by my brother, it wasn’t the right time. And that had only happened because I'd basically thrown her at him, thinking I was doing the right thing, thinking that he really cared for her.

  But next week when things had calmed down, I decided that I would have to talk to her, to try and be much more honest. I wanted to ask if we could maybe start again and work out something between us. So I resolved to make sure I saw her when she came to the office on Monday to bring her work in.

  But first I had to deal with Jamie. As I left Seraphina, I called him before driving over to the hotel where I'd told him to stay put. His phone rang for ages before he finally answered it.

  “Liam. Did you manage to find Sera so she wouldn’t…you know…?” he whispered.

  “Yes, I found her. Thanks for your concern, little brother. I'm sure you’ll be very glad to know she made it back to the house safely, no thanks to you, especially as she didn't even have her coat,” I snarled at him.

  “What? Oh, of course, but what did she say? Is she… is she going to the police?” he whispered very quietly. Why was he being so cagy?

  “No, luckily for you she doesn’t want them involved, even though I think she’s still in a state of shock. How could you have acted in that way? Do you have any idea what your reckless behaviour could have led to? What on earth possessed you to use physical violence on a defenceless female?”

  “I can't really talk about this right now,” he muttered distractedly.

  “What? Why not?” I asked suspiciously.

  “I’m… I’m not alone… and I’m a bit busy,” he murmured, and there were some distinctly female giggling noises. “Look, thanks for sorting things out, but I’ve got to go.”

  “Jamie, I really think….”

  He’d gone. He’d hung up on me. Un-fucking-believable.

  ~*~

  “Jamie! Open up. I want to talk to you. Now,” I demanded as I rapped on his hotel door. I wanted to find out just what was going on. “Come on, I know you’re in there.”

  “Liam? Err… what are you doing here?” his surprised voice called back.

  “What the fuck do you think? I want to know exactly what’s been going on.”

  “It’s… it’s not a very good time right now. Can't we talk tomorrow?”

  “Open this fucking door, or so help me God I will break it down,” I fumed at him. It was now gone one in the morning, and I was in no mood to be fobbed off.

  Slowly the door opened just enough for Jamie’s head to appear. I didn’t hesitate. I shoved the door right open and pushed past him into the room, feeling for the light switch as I went.

  “What’s going on? Who the hell are you?” a female voice protested as the light flicked on. I glanced around, and saw a pretty young blonde sitting up in bed, as she hastily wrapped a sheet around her naked body.

  “It’s okay, he’s my brother,” Jamie called out to her.

  “You. Out. Now.” I pointed at the door to her.

  “Liam! Now hang on just a second. You can't just march in here and order Poppy around like that,” Jamie argued. He’d grabbed his boxers from the floor and was hastily putting them on.

  “Fine, if that’s really what you want, but then I take it you're happy for this Poppy to stay and listen to what I've got to say to you about your earlier behaviour with Seraphina?” I stared at him.

  Jamie scowled at me.

  “Perhaps you’d better go,” he muttered to the girl.

  “Okay, but promise to call me, Jamie? It’s taken me months to finally get somewhere with you, and now this,” she grumbled, before giving me a filthy look. “Do you mind? I’d appreciate some privacy to get dressed.”

  “Don’t worry, love, I've seen it all before.” Poppy continued to glare at me. “Okay, you’ve got two minutes.” I rolled my eyes as I turned my back.

  “Look, I'm really sorry about this, Poppy,” Jamie apologised. “Rain check for round two eh?”

  “I’m going to hold you to that,” I heard her reply, and then there was the sickening sound of them kissing.

  “Your two minutes are up.” I turned around to find the girl more or less decent, so she picked up her shoes and flounced out.

  “You are unreal, Jamie. There was me thinking you’d be worried and upset about Seraphina because she was supposedly the love of your life, and yet here you are happily getting your end away before the sheets have even had time to cool down.”

  Jamie scowled at me again.

  “It’s not like that. I realised you were right all along. Sera was nothing more than a prick teasing weirdo with way too many issues for me to ever figure out. So we broke up. And like you’re always telling me, there are always plenty more fish in the sea. So I moved on, just like you always do. After Seraphina left, I texted Poppy to see if she was up for it.”

  “And clearly she was.”

  “Oh man, she most certainly was, but then you had to turn up and put a kibosh on things,” he complained.

  “Oh I'm so sorry. Perhaps you would have preferred to have had the police knocking on your door instead, come to arrest you for assault and attempted rape,” I yelled at him.

  “It would never have come to that. Nothing that bad happened. I admit things got a bit heated, but Sera really massively overreacted, and then I panicked a bit, so that’s why I rang you. I wasn’t thinking straight because I’d had a few beers.”

  “You’re dead right you weren’t thinking straight. I can't believe you thought it was acceptable to treat Seraphina the way you did. She has a cut lip and bruises on her arms that were inflicted by you. You’re lucky she isn’t pressing charges, and that she even asked me not to be too hard on you. And yet all you’re worried about is yourself. You’re not even the slightest bit concerned about Seraphina apart from wanting to be sure your own neck is safe, when she was so scared when she ran out of here that she left her coat behind. You had no idea how she was going to get back safely, but you didn't let that bother you, because you were too busy getting laid.”

  “It was her decision to leave. Sera’s always been very independent and able to take care of herself, as she’s told me countless times, so I knew she’d be okay. And maybe I’ve just hardened up and stopped being a sucker for a pretty face, just as you’ve been endlessly telling me I ought to.”

  I wanted to punch my brother. But I didn't, because I felt at least partly to blame, realising that I'd not set him the best of examples with my treatment of women.

  “Just stay away from your house for a while. Seraphina is moving
out, and she’d rather you didn't come back until she’s gone. I think you owe her that much at least, don’t you?”

  “Whatever. Seems a rather extreme reaction to me. I'm over her, so she needn’t flatter herself that I’d waste any more time on her. Anyway, I expect I can hang out at Poppy’s. We have some unfinished business to attend to.”

  “Of course. A nice easy screw for you. So satisfying.”

  “I don’t know why you sound so disapproving, Liam. I’d have thought you’d have been pleased. This is exactly how you like to do things, isn’t it? No strings sex. Just a great fuck for both parties.”

  What could I say? It was true. But now this behaviour just seemed to leave a bad taste in my mouth.

  “Just remember not to go back to the house before tomorrow evening. We’ll talk about this further when you’re fully sober.”

  Then I left him to it, pretty certain he’d be on his mobile to see if he could get Poppy to return the second the door closed behind me.

  ~*~

  It was pretty late by the time I got to bed in the early hours of Sunday morning, and I slept only fitfully. In the morning, I felt very restless, so I went for my usual swim and gym workout, then spent most of the day thinking through everything that had happened. I took stock of my life and how I was living it.

  I didn't like what I saw.

  I saw a cold, selfish, heartless man, one who was very successful in all areas, except for the most important one- my shallow personal life. It probably explained why I always got bored so easily and constantly felt restless.

  My personal life was nothing but a bare shell. I was a cold and calculating heartless bastard. That could also be interpreted as efficient and driven, but for what purpose? To make more money? I had more than enough for everything I needed. Where was I headed with the rest of my life? What was my goal? What did I want?

  However I tried to look at things, whichever way I turned things around in my head, it always came back to the same thing, the same answer.

  Seraphina was the key.

  She was the element that was missing in my life. I wanted Seraphina. Not just because she was beautiful and I was undeniably incredibly physically attracted to her. It went much deeper than that. This connection between us meant that I wanted to change things for her, so that she didn't have to struggle and work so hard all the time. I wanted to look after her and keep her safe. I wanted to change, to become a different kind of man – one that she would want to get to know and spend time with. For the first time, I wanted to share my life with someone. I wasn’t quite sure how to classify these feelings I had, or even just what they were. All I knew was that I wanted to be with Seraphina in some way.