Crossroads

by Skyy

  Lena locked eyes with Terrin. Terrin blushed. Lena’s long hair fell on her face. Terrin reached over, pushing the fallen hair behind Lena’s ear. She put her palm on Lena’s cheek. Lena felt the warmth in her hand. She grazed her cheek against Terrin’s hand.

  “Lena, I know we haven’t known each other long, but I knew on the plane that there was something drawing me to you. I’m a believer in fate, and I think there’s a reason we were on that plane together. I saw you in the café, and hell, we live in the same building. Someone is trying to tell us something. I can’t lie. I don’t want to ignore it.”

  Lena sighed. “I just ... Terrin, I don’t want to get involved with you, knowing I have my situation with Denise.”

  “I understand. I don’t expect you to jump into my arms. I would just like the chance to really get to know Lena Redding for who she is. Maybe help you in finding who you really want to be.”

  Lena’s heart was racing. She studied Terrin’s oval face and smooth caramel skin. Her big brown eyes were drawing Lena in. Her leg trembled as butterflies ran throughout her body.

  “I just don’t want to hurt another woman.”

  “Lena, if hurting me in the long run helps to heal you, then go right ahead. I’m a big girl, I can take it.”

  The warmth turned to a full fire. Lena shifted in her seat. She couldn’t think straight with Terrin staring at her. She wanted Terrin’s hand on her. She wanted to feel the warmth of Terrin’s body next to hers.

  “I think I need to go home.”

  “Are you sure?” Terrin questioned, trying to hide her disappointment.

  Lena stood up. “I have a lot to think about. But if it’s all right with you, I would like to see you again, maybe tonight.”

  Terrin’s lips curved upward. She stood up and wrapped her arms around Lena.

  Lena felt a familiar safety in Terrin’s arms, the same safety she felt when Denise held her.

  “That sounds great.” Terrin reluctantly let Lena go.

  Lena felt like she was floating all the way to her home. She unlocked the door and pulled it open. She walked in with her eyes closed and sighed.

  “Where have you been?”

  “Shit!” Lena jumped at the deep voice. She opened her eyes to see Brandon standing with an awkward expression on his face. “You scared the living daylights out of me.”

  “Lena, where have you been all night?”

  “Umm, I was at Car—”

  “Before you form your mouth to lie, Carmen has called here three times looking for yo ass.” Brandon’s voice rumbled.

  Lena’s eyes widened. She looked at his tall physique. He looked amazing in his jeans and blue polo shirt.

  “See, I wasn’t even about to say Carmen’s. You know my sorority sister, Carla. We had a girls’ night out last night.”

  “Girls’ night out, huh?” Brandon huffed. “Right, Lena.” Brandon walked to the bedroom.

  Lena followed.

  “Did it include the nigga you was with at Onyx?”

  Lena rolled her eyes. She wanted to kill Nicole. “See, I knew that bitch was gonna take that shit the wrong way. I wasn’t with that guy, his friend was trying to get at Carmen. Wait, why are you questioning me anyway? I haven’t talked to you in forever.”

  “I’m not really questioning you. I just thought we were past all the lies. And it’s tacky as hell for you to be all up on some nigga in public like that. Then you stay out all night!”

  “I wasn’t on anyone. I didn’t even know the guy, and I told you where I was. I’m not lying to you.”

  Brandon stopped and looked at Lena.

  Lena sighed. “OK, so I was lying, damn. Truth is, I went out with a friend I met in this building, and I got drunk and fell asleep on her couch. But it wasn’t a guy, and I really wasn’t on anyone at Onyx.”

  Brandon stared at Lena. “A friend in the building, huh? Gay or straight.”

  “Brandon, what the hell ...”

  “Gay or straight, Lena?” Brandon opened his dresser drawer.

  Lena tried to read his straight face.

  “She’s gay.”

  Brandon started laughing. “Wow, OK. Well, I just stopped by to get some things. I won’t be long.”

  “Brandon, don’t act like that!”

  Brandon continued to pull clothes out with a smirk on his face. “I’m not acting like anything.”

  “Ugh, whatever.” Lena sat on the edge of their bed. She didn’t like his nonchalant attitude. She preferred when he got angry.

  “So, what’s up, Lena? Are you gay now or something?” Brandon turned to Lena.

  “You are seriously pissing me off right now.”

  “What’s the deal with Denise? I saw her modeling shit. Guess she got up to NY and trying to blow up. What? No time for seducing my wife anymore?”

  Brandon’s words cut Lena like a rusty knife. She rolled her eyes. “I don’t know. I haven’t talked to her in forever.”

  Brandon pressed his lips together and nodded his head. “Well, wife, I guess I have everything I need.”

  Lena watched as Brandon pushed his expensive clothes into one of their pieces of luggage. Although angry, Lena was strangely attracted to him. She walked up behind him and put her arms around him.

  Brandon turned around to her.

  “What are you doing?”

  Lena smirked. “I don’t know.”

  Brandon frowned. He pushed Lena away. “Well, do that when you know what you are doing.” Brandon kissed Lena on her forehead and walked out the room, leaving Lena’s face on the floor.

  Lena’s fire was burning hot. Between Terrin and Brandon, she had to do something. She didn’t have anything to pleasure herself, no toys to help her get the orgasm her body was pleading for. Lena pulled her pants off and shirt over her head. She stretched her body across her expensive comforter, spreading her legs apart. Her fingers rubbed her swollen button, making her pussy wetter than before.

  “Lena, you know something ...”

  Brandon walked into the room. Lena jumped. Brandon’s eyes bucked. Lena looked at Brandon, Brandon stared back. He walked over to the bed, pulling his shirt off.

  Lena sat up and unbuttoned Brandon’s pants. His jeans fell to the ground.

  Brandon’s manhood stood at attention. Lena’s hands stroked his hard shaft. Brandon slowly got on top. Their mouths met. Brandon kissed his passion into Lena’s mouth. Lena scratched her fingers down Brandon’s broad backside.

  Brandon pulled Lena’s leg up, slowly entering her fire. He moaned as Lena’s cave curved around his dick.

  Lena closed her eyes. Brandon’s tongue danced on her nipple while he stroked in and out, in and out. Her fire burned for him. Lena moaned for more; she had forgotten how he felt inside her. Her queen missed his king.

  Brandon stroked as though he was on a mission. He wanted to fuck all lesbian thoughts out of Lena’s head. He wanted to remind her why she married him, why they were together for so long.

  “God, I love you, Lena,” Brandon murmured in between sucking on her erect nipples.

  “I love you too.” Lena’s passion spoke for her. The pleasure was creeping up her leg, making its way through her thighs. Every stroke of Brandon’s massiveness brought Lena pleasure and pain, pure ecstasy.

  Lena’s body jerked. She dug her nails into Brandon’s back, and the pain brought Brandon’s orgasm. Lena and Brandon exploded together, both dying a thousand deaths that they hadn’t experienced together in a long time.

  Brandon and Lena struggled to catch their breath. Lena rolled over, placing her head on Brandon’s hard chest. Brandon ran his hand through Lena’s hair. Words escaped them; they just lay together.

  Lena woke up a few hours later. Brandon was sound asleep, snoring next to her. She smiled, her womanhood still sore from the workout he put on her.

  Lena sat up in the bed, her leg ending in her wetness from their orgasm. Her smile began to fall. Happiness escaped her; she felt empty.

  Lena stood up
staring at Brandon’s face. He looked the same, his chest going up and down. She looked at the tattoo of her name written on his chest, a tattoo he only got because she caught him in a compromising position.

  Lena walked into the bathroom, her pussy still sore from their romp. She looked at herself in the mirror. Her body felt good, but her soul felt empty. Lena turned the shower on and got in. The warm water from the three shower heads hit her body in all the right spots. She washed the scent of sex from her estranged husband off of her body.

  Lena walked back into the bedroom. Brandon was no longer in the bed. She could hear the shower running from the guest bathroom. Lena looked in her closet. She looked at all her designer clothes. She thought about Nicole and the other basketball wives. She was like them in so many ways, but also completely different.

  She knew that with Brandon her life could never be like her first year in college. She missed the days of just seeming normal like Carmen and Denise. She knew being with Brandon meant embracing the high-society life she grew up in and detested.

  “Hey.” Brandon walked back into the room in just a pair of basketball sweats and no shirt. He sat on the side of the bed. “I guess we need to talk.”

  Lena looked at Brandon. She realized they had opened a can of worms they couldn’t just close. She knew life would be easier if she just stayed with him. She would never have to tell her parents she was getting divorced. But she knew her love for Denise had opened another can that also couldn’t be closed. She was attracted to women.

  “Brandon, I don’t really know what to say at this point.”

  “Lena, it’s obvious we still have something. Why can’t we just try to—?”

  “Brandon we never had an issue in the bedroom. It’s the other shit.”

  “So what do we do, Lena?

  “Brandon, can you sit here and tell me that you will never cheat on me again? That you won’t run across that one groupie you just can’t resist?”

  Brandon’s forehead wrinkled. “Can you sit here and tell me you are never going to want to fuck another woman?”

  Silence filled the room. Lena lowered her head.

  Brandon’s anger began to flare. “That’s some bullshit, Lena. You are not fucking gay!”

  “I don’t know what I am. God, this is frustrating!” Lena threw her hands up. “I don’t know anything right now. I don’t know who I am anymore. I know nothing!”

  Lena’s body was trembling. She had come face to face with reality, and was confused.

  Brandon could see the agony in Lena’s face. He stood up, walking over and placing his arms around her.

  “Lena, calm down.” Brandon didn’t know what to think of Lena’s tantrum. He didn’t recognize his wife anymore. Brandon’s head dropped. He rubbed his hand through his hair. “Lena, I don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t know how to help you, how to be there for you with this. I don’t know if I can sit back and wait on my wife to realize if she wants to be with me or not.”

  Lena looked at Brandon, his brow wrinkled, lips locked. She was breaking him. “I’m not asking you to wait.”

  Brandon looked at Lena. She had never given him permission to move on before; it hurt him to know she could give him that option so easily. “When you figure out what the hell you want, you know where to find me. Just hope someone else hasn’t found me first.”

  Lena wanted to yell at him for his statement, but she couldn’t talk. She watched as Brandon gathered his things. She wanted to tell him to stay, but something was holding her back.

  Brandon looked at Lena, hoping she would say anything, but she didn’t. He shook his head. The muscles in his arms bulged as he held his anger in; he gave up and walked out the room.

  Lena looked at the large print of their wedding photo hanging on the wall. They looked so happy, so in love, but it was all a sham. She wondered how they pulled it off, how they were able to fool everyone, including each other. Behind the smiles were secrets. Brandon’s baby’s mother had interrupted their wedding celebration, only to be detained with a story about a crazed fan. Lena, holding her own secret, let Denise make love to her for the first time only hours before they said, “I do.”

  Brandon finished getting dressed in the guest bathroom. He peered at his reflection in the mirror; he had done so much dirt to Lena over the years. All the groupies that he shared his bed with had caught up to him. Karma was taking care of him; he was losing his beautiful wife.

  Brandon opened the door to see Lena standing in the doorway of their bedroom. Their eyes met. Two beautiful people who had a beautiful wedding, and a beautiful life now falling apart in front of them.

  “I don’t want to lose you in my life.” Lena wrapped her arms around his strong torso. Brandon put his arms around Lena, holding her as though it was the last time.

  “You will never lose me in your life. I love you and always will.”

  “What do we do now?”

  “You can keep the loft, your car, and we can work the rest out.”

  Lena buried her head in Brandon’s chest. She felt safe in his arms, but not the type of safety she desired. “OK.”

  Brandon fought his tears back. He pulled away from Lena. He placed a single kiss on her lips; they both knew it would be the last.

  25

  Cooley’s beautiful desk was covered with papers, CDs, and photos of Sahara. The singles were bona fide hits. She knew it had to be backed up with the best CD possible. She pressed the track button on her remote, skipping to the next possible song for the CD.

  Sahara’s voice enticed Cooley. She fidgeted in her seat. Cooley tried to remember the last time she had sex. She knew it was too long. She needed some and she needed some bad. Sahara’s pictures didn’t help the situation. Her smooth caramel skin, round ass and plump breasts were calling to Cooley, and she wanted to answer. A slow knock on the door brought Cooley out of her sexual trance.

  “Come in!” Cooley shifted in her chair.

  The door opened slowly. Tee walked in slowly.

  “What’s up, Tee?” Cooley noticed the pained expression on Tee’s face. Her eyes red and puffy, her lips pressed tight together. “What’s wrong?”

  “Cool,” Tee’s voice trembled, “I’m so sorry.”

  Cooley stood up. She walked from behind her desk. “What is going on?”

  Cooley’s phone began to blare. She picked the phone up and checked her messages.

  R.I.P Keisha “Supa Sonic” Jackson. Jam Zone has lost a family member today. Sonic you will always be loved and missed.

  Cooley held her phone tight. The text blurred. She couldn’t move. “What happened?”

  Tee struggled to respond. “She ... she OD’d” Tears began to fall from Tee’s face.

  Cooley fought the tears back. “I need a moment. Close the door behind you,” Cooley said, never looking up from her screen.

  Tee immediately obeyed.

  It felt like a bus crashed into Cooley. Her legs felt weak. She sat on the edge of her desk. Cooley closed her eyes, trying to block the images of Sonic running through her head. She could see her so vividly; the last time they saw each other, Sonic’s frail state. This is all my fault.

  Tears streamed down Cooley’s face. Cooley knew the news must have hit everyone. Her phone started to blare back to back. She couldn’t pick it up; she couldn’t face anyone. Guilt took over her body, as the images of Sonic played like a movie in her brain.

  Cooley didn’t hear the door open. Sahara walked in, her makeup flawed with streaks from her overflowing tears. Sahara walked over to Cooley. She put her palm on Cooley’s shoulder.

  Cooley didn’t look up. Sahara’s hand was like a magnet, bringing the emotions all the way to the surface. Cooley leaned into Sahara. Sahara wrapped her arms around Cooley.

  “It’s my fault, it’s all my fault,” Cooley cried.

  “No, baby, it’s not.” Sahara held Cooley in her arms, rocking her gently.

  “I shouldn’t have pushed her. I pushed her. Oh God. Why! W
hy!” Cooley’s voice cracked. She wrapped her arms around Sahara. Sahara was only the second woman to see her cry. She held on to her, not wanting to let go.

  “Carla, it’s not your fault. She wouldn’t want you blaming yourself. You did what you could. You were a friend to her, she knows that. Don’t do this to yourself. Come on, baby, don’t do this, Carla.”

  Cooley looked up at Sahara. “What did you call me?”

  Sahara’s big brown eyes widened. “I’m sorry, I didn’t.”

  Cooley put her index finger up to Sahara’s soft plump lips. “My name, I never liked when people called me by my real name.” Cooley gazed into Sahara’s beautiful eyes. She ran her fingers through Sahara’s wavy hair.

  Sahara looked at Cooley with a confused glare.

  “I liked that.”

  Cooley slowly pulled Sahara’s face to hers. Their lips gently met. Sahara parted her lips, allowing Cooley’s tongue to enter into a passionate dance. Sahara held on to Cooley’s T-shirt, wrinkling the fabric with the imprint of her fingers.

  Cooley’s hand rubbed through Sahara’s long hair, letting her fingers roam freely down her scalp. Cooley slowly pulled her face from Sahara’s.

  “I need you,” Cooley whispered.

  Sahara nodded her head.

  “Anything, baby. Need me, let me be there for you. Cooley, just let me love you,” Sahara pleaded, her eyes filled with water.

  Cooley wiped the first tear to fall down Sahara’s face. “Call me Carla.”

  26

  Denise sat in the hallway. She looked at the row of gorgeous women sitting around her, all holding their portfolios tight. Go-see appointments never seemed so long and boring on America’s Next Top Model. Denise looked at the women around her. She could see the drive and determination in their eyes, drive that she didn’t have.

  Denise sighed. Her eyes shifted, catching glimpse of a beautiful chocolate model. The model smiled, Denise smiled back. She had never seen teeth that white or that perfect before in all her life. The model’s hair was pulled back in a bun. Denise noticed her striking facial features. Her cheekbones were high and defined, resembling Naomi Campbell in her early days.