Angels in My Hair

by Lorna Byrne

  We could not see Joe or John, but we found the loo. It was just a loo in a long shed with a door. There was no toilet seat, but it was usable and it wasn't too bad. I asked Elizabeth about the building next door to it.

  'It's another shed, we have the same next door.

  Then we heard Joe and John. 'Don't look into that shed,' Joe said. That was irresistible, of course. 'Oh, I'll just have a peep, seeing as you said that.' I peeped in and, of course, it was piled high as a mountain with all kinds of things. 'What are the other sheds like?' I asked.

  'You wouldn't want to look into them either.' John said. >'You've got another big shed there and down past that you've got a piggery – it's a small shed with an outer wall around it and a gate into a little yard. It would be an ideal place if you had chickens. They are all full of junk but, sure, I'll give Joe a hand and we can clear some of it out when he's here next and burn it.'

  'God, John, you are very good to give us a hand,' I said.

  John turned around and said, 'Well, we'd better go now, Elizabeth, and leave the two of you to yourselves.'

  As Elizabeth was walking away, she turned around and said, 'Before you go home would you like to come in for a cup of tea? We'd love to have you.'

  'Would you like to do that?' I asked Joe. He nodded, 'We'll be in, in five or ten minutes; we'll just have a little time looking around here and sorting out a few things.' So off they went. I was really so happy and so was Joe. 'Isn't it wonderful that this house is ours now?We have a lot of work to do but I know we can do it.'

  We went back into the house and Joe reached up and started to pull bits of the wallpaper off the walls, to see how hard it would be to strip them. It wasn't too bad. The lino on the floor was all torn and the two of us started to lift it. We got a shock because under each layer of lino there was another. Under the bottom layer, there was a thick layer of newspapers – hundreds of them all glued together. We looked at each other.

  'Let's get something and see if we can move them,' Joe suggested.

  We got a piece of stick and under all those layers of lino and newspapers were straw and clay. Eventually, under all that, believe it or not, were floorboards – quite decent ones. We found out later from Elizabeth that this was done to insulate the room, to keep the heat in.

  We had a lovely cup of tea with Elizabeth and John. She told me a little about Mrs Costello who used to live there and how she looked like Mrs Tiggywinkle in the Beatrice Potter story; with a big hat, a big coat and she always carried a big bag. She lived on her own and never had any visitors.

  John invited Joe to see his house and garden. Looking through the window at them, I could see angels playing around them. I smiled.

  'You seem so happy, smiling there,' Elizabeth said.

  'I am very, very happy,' I replied. It was lovely to be there in their home, to have a happy family home right next to us, to see the light around Elizabeth and John. They also had a lovely little boy; I don't know what age he was, maybe ten.

  'Anytime you need us, just give us a call,' Elizabeth offered. We thanked them and Joe and I left and walked down the road holding hands.

  The following Saturday, Joe brought his mum to the cottage. I was already there waiting for them. When Joe's mum got out of the car, she gave us a big hug, looked around and said, 'Oh my God! From the outside you have a big job on your hands.' Joe's mum asked him to open the boot of the car; she had everything needed for cleaning. We carried the whole lot into the cottage. She walked in.

  'Well,' she said, 'This little cottage has the makings of a great home.'

  Over the next two days we did a lot of cleaning. Spending that time together gave me the chance to really get to know Joe's mum, and we had great fun together. Those two days were wonderful and we got an awful lot of work done. Joe's mum was brilliant. And by the time our wedding came around, the cottage was habitable – just about.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Telling Joe

  One morning down in the cloakroom at work, Pauline and I were chatting about wedding dresses and she asked the supervisor if it would be possible for us to have a lunch break together so we could go to the fabric shop. The supervisor agreed and put us on the same lunch break.

  When lunchtime came, Pauline and I went to the canteen, had a five-minute lunch and headed out to the shops. We looked at hundreds of dress patterns and rolls and rolls of fabric. It was very exciting. Eventually, after many lunch breaks of looking, I found a fabric that I really liked and which, I felt, would be suitable for a wedding dress – it was cream with little wine-coloured wildflowers scattered here and there. Pauline found a beautiful fabric that matched the flowers on mine. But I didn't buy anything just yet; I knew Mum would want to come shopping for my wedding dress with me.

  Even with all the time we spent together looking for fabric, I hadn't told Pauline about the wedding reception being at home. I dreaded the thought of telling her and the other two girls. One day, I asked the angels when would be the best time to tell my friends and they said, 'Right now.'

  'You mean now, on our tea break?' I asked.

  'Yes!' my angels replied. When I walked into the canteen I saw Valerie and Mary sitting at our usual table. I went and got tea and biscuits and joined them. As I sat down, Valerie asked:

  'Lorna, we are dying to know where the reception is being held.' My friends were all smiles and full of excitement.

  'It is being held in my parents' house in Leixlip,' I said. I could see from the expression on their faces that they were shocked.

  'You are joking, Lorna?' Mary said.

  'No,' I said. 'I wouldn't joke about something as important as my wedding day.'

  They asked me all kinds of questions then, including why my mum and Da wanted to have the reception in the house. I told them it was kind of a custom in my mum's family and that Mum's heart was set on it. Then they asked who else was coming to the wedding.

  'It's mostly family. My parents and brothers and sisters, some of my uncles and aunts, Joe's family, of course, you two and my bridesmaid, Pauline. We'll be about thirty in total for the meal. Some neighbours are coming to the church.'

  A few days later, while I was sitting in the canteen having lunch with my friends, Val said she had a few suggestions to make about the wedding reception.

  'How about, Lorna, if we all leave after the meal, and go into Dublin to a pub with music and dancing to celebrate?'

  'It's a great idea and I'm sure Joe would agree,' I replied, 'considering that we won't be able to dance in the house. How are you going to get to the church in Leixlip that morning?' I asked.

  'We are going to meet in Dublin,' Val answered, 'and get the bus to the church. Let's hope it doesn't rain, because we don't want to bring coats. And I hope it's not too long a walk to the church, because we will all be wearing high heels!'

  'Two minutes,' I assured them. 'Make sure you are all early.' They laughed and said they were really looking forward to their day out.

  Later that day, when Pauline was helping me tidy the rails just before closing time in the fashion department, I said to her, 'I guess it's time for me to tell you where the wedding reception will be held.'

  'I have already heard from the other girls that it is at your parents' house,' Pauline said. 'I think that is great.'

  I told her it was nice of her to say that.

  When I got home from work that night, Mum suggested we should go shopping for the dress material on my day off, the next day. I was looking forward to going into town with Mum and buying the material and pattern for my wedding dress – even though I had already chosen it and knew exactly what I would buy. I hadn't, of course, told her this. I knew Mum would enjoy going around the stores, so I said nothing.

  Going in and out of the fabric departments and stores in Dublin with Mum the next morning was fun, but Mum was getting a little annoyed because I didn't like anything I saw, although she saw lots that she thought would be perfect.

  'I don't want a traditional dress
,' I said to Mum, 'and I definitely don't want to wear white! There is one more fabric store, Mum; you brought me to it once, it's down a side street beside Clerys.'

  After a cup of tea, Mum led the way to the fabric store. We looked at lots of material on big rolls, some standing and some lying flat on counters.When we came to my chosen one, I said to Mum, 'I think this material is beautiful, I love the cream colour and wine wild flowers scattered around it and look, this one, standing beside it would be perfect for the bridesmaid's dress.'

  'Yes,' Mum nodded. 'It is beautiful. They would go together very well.' As my mum said those words, angels arrived all around us. As Mum asked, 'How much does the material cost?' I nearly burst out laughing because I could hear the angels' voices, like a chorus, chanting 'No price tag, no price tag'. I knew the angels had made the price tag disappear.

  Mum decided to ask one of the staff the price. All the angels stopped their activity and waved their hands, indicating 'no'. I knew then I had to stop Mum, because she was going to think the material was too expensive and try and get me to buy something cheaper. This was something I would not allow, but I didn't want to hurt her either.

  'Don't worry, Mum,' I said, 'I am paying for the material and pattern and all that I will need for the dress. Let's look through the pattern books.'

  The angels took Mum's arm as we walked to the back wall where all the pattern books were. Mum opened one of the books and started to look. I suggested that, to save time, I would look at another one. I must have looked through five books before I found the pattern I had seen before. I called Mum over, 'Look, this pattern will suit the material I have chosen beautifully.'

  Mum was very good at making clothes and she knew how to read the back of the pattern and see how much material I would need for both dresses. When Mum had finished calculating the amount of material that was needed, we went to the counter and I asked the assistant for it. She got the two rolls of material, laid them on the counter and measured the material out, yard by yard. It piled up on the counter and the girl folded it perfectly and put it in a bag. She also put the patterns and all the trimmings we needed into the bag.

  'That's £25.99 in total,' she said.

  As I was handing her the money, Mum said she wanted to pay for the material for my wedding dress. I was pleased by her offer but said, 'No, Mum. It's too much.' But Mum kept on insisting, so I let her pay. She seemed very happy and proud as she handed the assistant the money.We said thank you and as we were leaving the shop, one of the angels was standing at the door. I thanked the angel in a whisper, and then we headed home. As we walked to the bus stop, carrying the bags, I thanked Mum.

  I was like a little child, full of excitement, wanting to show Joe the material and to bring it over to his mum's house. Then, that evening Joe's mum said, 'I will have to meet your mother and father. Will you ask them can they come to dinner on Sunday?'

  When Joe dropped me home that night, I went in the back door as usual. I was surprised my Mum and Da were still in the dining room, so I seized the opportunity.

  'Hello! I was not expecting to see you up. By the way, Joe's mum has invited both of you to dinner on Sunday at five o'clock.'

  Mum was not too impressed, but Da said, 'Of course we'll come. Tell Joe's mum we'll be there at five on Sunday.' I was delighted and offered to make them a cup of tea. Da refused and said, 'Go off to bed.' I said goodnight.

  The next day after work, I caught the bus to Joe's mum's house and I told her that my parents would come to dinner on Sunday. She was delighted, if a little nervous. I know she went to great trouble to have a perfect dinner that Sunday evening.

  When I arrived with my parents for dinner at Joe's, Da knocked on the door and I was glad to see it was Joe who answered it. Joe welcomed Mum and Da in and gave me a hug. We went into the dining room; the table was set for a queen. It was fabulous. Joe introduced his Mum, his sister Barbara, her husband and their children. One funny thing happened at the beginning, though; Barbara kept on insisting Mum take off her coat and Mum kept saying, 'No, it's fine.'

  I pulled Joe out of the room and whispered, 'It's not a coat, it's a coat-dress. Tell Barbara to stop asking or I will burst out laughing.'

  Joe said he never heard of a coat-dress before, and when he went back into the dining room, his sister was asking my mum again, could she take her coat. Joe just interrupted and pulled out a chair for Mum to sit down.

  We had a fabulous dinner of roast beef with roast potatoes, cabbage and carrot. For dessert we had her wonderful apple pie and cream. I've never had any apple pie that was better than hers. Joe's mum had really done us proud, everything went well.

  All through the summer before our marriage, the angels had been telling me to let Joe know a little about my secret. I told them many times I was apprehensive. I wanted to be able to share my secret with someone, and especially Joe, but I was scared of his reaction – what if he did not believe me?

  'You should only share part of your secret,' the angels told me. 'A little at a time, no more than that. Keep in mind, Lorna, that you will never be able to share your entire secret; some of it can never be told. Next time there is a suitable opportunity, we will help you.'

  A few nights later, as Joe was taking me home, he suggested going for a drive up into the mountains.

  'It's going to be a beautiful night,' he said, 'there is a full moon and hopefully the sky will be full of stars. I know a place where we can park and have a wonderful view of Dublin and the sea beyond.'

  When we got there, there were lots of other cars. 'Let's go for a little walk and maybe sit on the wall over there for a little while,' I said.

  The wall was only a pile of scattered rocks, but we sat and Joe held me in his arms.We kissed and I felt safe. I don't know how long we sat there, but all of a sudden I noticed the sky was full of stars. Then some of them seemed to spin and fall and as they came closer to the earth I saw they were angels. I could hear the angels say, 'Now is the time to share a little of your secret with Joe.'

  I turned in Joe's arms and said I had something to tell him. He looked at me and asked was it something to do with the wedding.

  'No,' I said, 'It is actually about me. Let me explain something. I see things that other people don't normally see. Sometimes I see angels.'

  A look of complete disbelief came over his face. He looked at me and laughed, 'Lorna, as far as I know only nuns and priests see angels. This is ridiculous! Ordinary people like you and I don't see angels.'

  I looked at him nervously, this was just as I feared. I silently called, 'Help!' to the hundreds of angels who were around me.

  He gave me a hug and said no more about it.

  'Let's go. It's late and we both have work tomorrow.'

  The journey home was silent except for a few words. Joe glanced at me now and then while driving as if to say, 'what have I got here?'

  I was giving out to the angels, saying, 'Joe's not responding well to this at all.'

  When we pulled up outside my house, Joe said, 'Lorna. You have asked me to believe in something that I haven't ever thought of before.' But I felt a little bit reassured when he hugged me and gave me a kiss.

  As I walked round to the back door, I was still giving out to the angels. The angel said, 'Don't worry, Lorna, this is just the beginning of Joe getting to know you.'

  I wondered how I was going to be able to get him to believe me, but I soon had an opportunity.

  Although Joe no longer worked with Da, he sometimes helped him out in the garage. One Thursday evening as I finished work, I had a vision – I saw lots of glass, large windows; light seemed to be shining on them and blocking my vision, and yet it seemed to be dark. 'What's all this about?' I asked my angels.

  The angels said, 'Tell Joe.'

  'I really don't want to,' I replied.

  'Remember your vision, Lorna,' the angels said. 'Now do you see where it is?'

  'Yes, it's the garage.'

  That evening I told Joe. 'That does not mea
n anything,' he replied.

  No more was said, but I was worried and I gave out to the angels again. On Friday, I had the vision again, this time I saw Joe in a car, as if he was driving it to the pumps for petrol; I saw men approach the car and Joe wind down the window. Then the vision was gone.

  I told Joe I had the vision again and explained in detail what I had seen. 'I don't want you getting hurt. It's a warning.'

  'I don't believe in that kind of thing,' Joe said. 'Your Da rang and left me a message, he needs me to work the weekend; the man who does the night shift has left, so he has no one for Saturday and Sunday, midnight to seven in the morning shift.'

  I had the vision again and I was shown more still. I saw Joe wind down the window and one of the two men punch him in the face. Then I saw Joe in the police station, and the police believed the other men, not Joe. I couldn't make out what it was all about; I was upset now and giving out to the angels.

  'Joe will have a bleeding nose,' the angels said, 'but otherwise he will be okay. Remember the vision, Lorna; the police may not believe him, but it will be all sorted out eventually.' After work I went to Joe's mum's house and Joe and I went for a walk around the housing estate. I pleaded with Joe to believe me. I was mad with him. I said, 'Why won't you listen to me?'

  All the time his guardian angel was whispering in his ear. I wanted to shout at Joe, 'Your guardian angel is trying to tell you, but you won't listen.' Joe promised that, because I seemed to be so upset, he would be very careful over the weekend.

  That weekend the vision unfolded, and it all happened just as I had seen.

  One evening Joe was repairing a customer's car and went to fill it with petrol. A friend of the owner of the car was passing and believed Joe had stolen it. He yelled at Joe and when Joe wound down the window he punched him in the face then called the police. The police did not believe Joe and arrested him. Da bailed him out and everything was sorted out, but that evening Joe got another insight into who I am.

  Two weeks before my wedding, Pauline, Valerie and Mary took me on a hen night to celebrate. I had never been out after work with them before. They took me first to Smyth's, the pub that Valerie went to most Friday evenings, which was full of people who worked in the department store. Valerie and Mary seemed to know everyone in the pub, and there was a lot of laughter. They were used to drinking, but I was not. They encouraged me to have a glass of wine; it went straight to my head, which my friends thought was hilarious. One glass was more than enough for me, as I could really feel its effect, and after that I stuck to 7Up.