So there I was sitting in my little flat, as they called it, watching some show about teenage wannabes trying to get to be famous rock stars and win a recording contract. Talk about a pile of shit. I’d been advised that alcohol should be avoided on account of the meds I was still taking, but every so often I threw caution to the wind and drank a few beers.
I glanced at the clock on the wall. Eight in the evening on a Saturday. Fucking great. I know how to live. I was just contemplating eating a bag of chips I’d gotten from the local store earlier when there was a knock on the door and I scrunched my brow. Who the fuck would be checking up on me at eight on a Saturday? I’d had my daily visit at five, and so I guessed it must be a neighbour needing to borrow milk or something. The place I was in was filled with those coming out of rehab or mental health care, and most of them kept to themselves, which was fine by me. I felt like a fucking fraud to be taking up an apartment that could have been put to better use. But I had nowhere else to go.
Dragging myself off the brown leather couch I walked to the door and opened it. What I saw… or rather who I saw had my mouth falling open in shock. The best shock I’d had in fucking months.
“Kelly? What the hell are you doing here?” Shit, way to make someone feel welcome, dickweed.
She smiled nervously. “I… I thought you might like a little Christmas tree for your flat.” She held up a huge bag that was overflowing with sparkly shit.
Rubbing the back of my neck and trying not to focus on how amazing she looked and smelled, all the while trying to hide the fact that I was now sporting a huge fucking boner, I smiled. “Oh… right, yeah. That’s great, thanks. C-come on in.”
She cringed and bit her lower lip. “If it’s a bad time… or if you don’t celebrate Christmas or—”
I laughed and held the door open, gesturing for her to come in. “Why the fuck would I not celebrate Christmas, huh?”
Her smile returned, and she stepped into my living room. She glanced around and began removing the scarf from her neck. “Nice place you’ve got here.”
“Oh yeah. Totally amaze balls.” My mock teenage-girl reply was drenched in sarcasm, and she hit my arm playfully. I rubbed my arm and pouted. “Want a drink?”
She narrowed her eyes at me. “What have you got?”
I crossed my arms defensively over my chest. “Well I don’t have any beer, if that’s what you’re wondering.”
She scrunched her face suspiciously and pursed her lips for a moment, and I thought I was busted. But then a sly smile appeared on her luscious lips. “Shame. I would’ve loved a beer.”
“Ah, well… it just so happens I think some appeared in my fridge just now. Only on doctor’s orders obviously.”
“Oh, obviously.” She grinned. I loved that her playful nature was coming out, and the way she cocked her head to the side just about made me throw her down and climb on top of her. God, I’d missed her so fucking much.
Once I had grabbed a couple beers from the little refrigerator in the kitchen area and adjusted my cock in my boxers, I cracked off the caps and returned to hand one to Kelly where she sat on the couch.
I sat on the chair opposite, needing to keep my distance. Being close to her would be too much, and I couldn’t be sure I would be able to keep my hands to myself. “So… how’ve you been?” I asked her, suddenly feeling like an awkward teenage geek.
“Shouldn’t it be me asking you that?”
I chuckled. “Ah, what the hell. Let’s break with convention, huh?”
She laughed but her eyes remained guarded. Secretive. “I’ve been okay… I suppose.”
That didn’t sound good, and deep down I hoped it was down to the fact that she’s missed me too. “You suppose?”
She placed her beer down on the small wooden coffee table and sighed heavily, her gaze locked on her bottle. “I know I maybe shouldn’t say this. And that maybe you don’t want to hear it but… I’ve missed you.”
I widened my eyes. Surprised at her revelation. And so fucking relieved. The air rushed from my lungs and my dick hardened even more, to the point where it was almost painful. I tried to ignore it and concentrate on what she’d just said. “You have?”
She nodded and glanced up at me. Her pink cheeks revealed her embarrassment at admitting her feelings. “I really have.”
I placed my beer down and moved to sit beside her on the couch. “But I haven’t gone very far.”
Her smile was small and fleeting. “No… but I don’t see you every day anymore. I’d sort of got used to that. And soon you’ll be gone for good.”
I reached out and took her hand as my heart began to race. “Well… I’m here with you now.”
She turned her face and gazed into my eyes. “You are,” she whispered, and I could sense her pain.
Needing no other words, I slipped my hand into her hair and crushed my lips into hers. Her hands clutched at my sweater and our tongues melded together, reacquainting and reconnecting. The urgency of her kiss took me off guard, but I reciprocated with just as much desperation. She scrambled onto my lap, and her long skirt bunched up around her thighs as she straddled me. Her core rubbed against my erection and that fuelled my fire. Keeping my mouth on hers, I reached down and pulled off her each of her boots in turn, dropping them to the floor as she bit my lower lip and I moaned my appreciation.
I was so hard for her.
I yanked my sweater from my body and dropped it behind the couch and then tugged at the hem of the cute blue sweater she wore, and she pulled away so that I could strip it from her. My hands roamed over her soft, bare skin and cupped her satin-covered breasts as her fingers slipped into my hair, tugging desperately at the long strands. She removed her hands from my hair and scratched her nails down my chest and over my nipples as she rolled her hips, rubbing herself over my cock.
I inhaled sharply.
“I fucking need you, Kelly. I need to be inside you. Tell me I can make love to you,” I growled against her lips.
She pulled her hands away from my hair and reached around to unclasp her bra, discarding it to one side. I devoured each perfect breast, one and then the other, biting at the stiff peaks that beckoned to me. Her breathy cries told me the answer she hadn’t uttered, and I tugged at the skirt she wore, pulling it up her torso and off over her head.
I wanted no barriers between me and her skin, her tits, her pussy. I needed that intimate connection with her, and right then I would have ripped every item of clothing from her body to get what I needed.
With her mouth on mine, she reached between her legs and stroked my rigid cock through my sweatpants. Desperate to be inside of her, I lifted my ass and yanked the damn things down along with my boxers so that my cock was free for her to touch. Skin to skin. And my God, it felt so good. She gripped me and began to stroke me. It was too much and not enough simultaneously.
“Stop… Kelly, stop… I don’t wanna come until I’m inside you.”
Wordlessly she slipped off my lap, dropped to her knees, and sucked me into her hot, wet mouth. Fuck, I’d wanted her mouth on me for so damn long. I gripped her hair, trying to stop the onslaught of pleasure. “Whoa, baby, slow down… fuuuuck… that’s too good… too fucking good.”
She pulled away and smiled sexily up at me. “You said you wanted to come inside me, but you didn’t say where.”
Oh, she was playing dirty. And I fucking loved it. She sank back down again, taking me all the way in, and I gritted my teeth, desperately trying not to come in her greedy mouth.
I gasped and scrambled around my head for words to express my need, but my brain was in meltdown. “Pussy… now… Kelly, I want to be inside you.”
Freeing my erection again, she stood, hooked her thumbs into to the waistband of her black satin panties, and pouted. “All you have to do is ask, baby.”
Hearing her call me baby in that sexy-as-all-hell Scottish accent nearly un-fucking-manned me right then, and knowing that she had used my own words back at me made me fall
harder. Gazing up at her through half-closed eyes, I smiled and shook my head. She stood before me, naked. Her full breasts with their pretty beaded nipples begging for my mouth and her curves on display only for me. I wanted to dive right in.
I needed this.
I needed her.
Chapter Twenty-One
Kelly
I’d missed him so much more than I should have. I was able to admit it to myself once I was with him even though I’d tried so hard to tell myself I was fine. I’d missed the intense connection that ran between us like molten lava, glowing and beautiful but so very dangerous. For days, I’d fought the decision to visit him, until Esme insisted that I did, just to prove to myself once and for all that there was nothing between us. She knew what she was doing. And she knew damn well that there was something between us.
He had been the central focus of all my fantasies. But making myself come with my vibrator or my hands was nothing compared to the feeling of being with him. I needed that connection to him like I needed air to breathe. And here I was breaking all the rules yet again. I was wet for him and wanted him so desperately. I gazed down at him where he sat with his joggers halfway down his legs, his cock thick and glistening from my mouth.
“Straddle me again, Kelly. I need to fuck you now, sweetheart.”
His voice was gravelly with lust and hearing him speak increased my desire for him tenfold. I needed him inside of me too, but I’d missed his tongue and the way he made me feel when he kissed me everywhere. Stepping closer to him, I reached and slipped my finger into his mouth. He obliged and sucked on it, pulling it deep into his luscious mouth. But then I removed it and pointed to my sex. A wide, knowing smile took over his handsome face and he leaned forward, grabbing my hips and pulling me to his mouth.
Oh, wow, it felt so good to have his mouth on me again. I let my head roll back as his tongue delved into me, licking and sucking at my sensitive bud of nerves as pleasure coursed through my veins. His fingers dug into my arse cheeks and he groaned against me. The sensation was like the world’s most powerful vibrator, and I gasped, gripping his shoulders.
“Oh, that’s so good… so good,” I moaned.
“You taste amazing… all woman,” he mumbled against my clit, and the vibrations of his deep, lust-filled voice caused my core muscles to spasm. He reached to tug on my nipple, and I cried out and collapsed forward.
“Oh, God, what you do to me, Cain.”
Giving me one more long, slow lick up my centre, he pulled me into his lap so that I straddled him again. He pulled me down onto his rigid flesh as I was cresting the wave of the most intense orgasm I’d ever had, and the feeling of him pounding straight into my already tensing muscles and rubbing against that sensitive place inside me brought on an even more powerful climax as he lifted me up by my hips and thrust himself into me, hard, with a carnal grunt. I couldn’t get enough. I felt him tense up and when I locked my gaze on his he was clenching his jaw and making the sexiest sound over and over as he pushed into me.
“Kelly, oh fuck, Kelly… Kelly, I love you…. Oh God, Kelly, I love you so much.”
His words shocked me to the heart, but the intensity of the sensations he was creating in me pushed me over the edge again. This time when I cried out, it was his name falling from my lips as my heart soared.
My greedy muscles clenched at him as my nails dug into the tattoos on his shoulders. I threw my head back as I bounced up and down on his thick, rigid cock, unwilling to give him up just yet. The orgasm rolled around my body relentlessly as he pulled me down and held me tight to him with a final libidinous growl.
Once again I collapsed into him and buried my face into the crook of his damp neck as he clung to me. His chest heaved against my sensitive nipples, creating little shock waves of pleasure that I could hardly handle.
When his breathing had calmed, he pulled away from me and nervously gazed into my eyes. “I… I’m sorry about that. I… think I got caught up in the moment.”
I smoothed my hands through his overgrown shaggy hair as a sense of sadness weighed heavy on me at his apology. “It’s okay. I know you didn’t mean it.”
His face scrunched. “Hey, I didn’t say I didn’t mean it. I said I was sorry because I blurted it out at the most clichéd fucking time, Kelly. But believe me when I say I do mean it. You’re all I can think about. Ever since I laid eyes on you, I’ve known I felt something for you. And then when my memory came back and I thought it was because of your similarity in appearance to Melody, but… it’s not just that. It’s more. Not being around you made me realise that. I’ve known for a while, but… I knew there was no point in saying anything.”
I swallowed hard, trying to relax my tightened throat. “You… you really love me?” Saltwater began to sting at my eyes.
He nodded and pulled me down to kiss me tenderly.
Cain
Well, it was out there. I’d admitted how I felt at the worst possible moment. I was just relieved she didn’t think I was some unoriginal dumb-ass. Well, if she did think that, she wasn’t admitting to it. The problem was, now that it was out there, I was terrified of the future.
I pulled her down and kissed her long and deep, and she melted into my body. She fit me like a glove, and the fact that soon I would be leaving to go home scared the shit out of me. Her life was here, and I didn’t want to drag her into the shit that would no doubt be waiting for me back in Utah.
This meant one thing.
We were temporary.
She pulled away and gazed into my eyes. “Cain, what’s wrong?”
“Oh… nothing.” I sighed, realising that keeping things from her was futile. It was her job to delve deeper. “I just feel a little scared is all.”
She cupped my face and kissed the tip of my nose. So damn sweet. “Scared of what?”
“Kelly, I’ll be going home soon… back to the US. Where the hell does that leave us?”
She closed her eyes and rested her forehead on mine. “Can we… can we just not think about that now? I just want to be with you. I shouldn’t even be here, Cain but… there’s nowhere else I’d rather be than right here with you for now.”
Her words broke my heart, and I was at a loss for what I could say in response to her, so I pulled her down and kissed her once again, slipping my fingers into the silky strands of her hair. I hardened beneath her again and shifted to lay her down on my couch.
“If we only have a short time together, I want to spend as much of it as possible making love to you. I don’t know how long we have left, Kelly, but whatever happens, I want you to know that I will never forget you.”
She parted her thighs and I slipped myself inside of her again, needing that intimacy with her even though it only reminded me of what I’d be missing when I left. I took my time. Slowly worshipping her body and gazing into her eyes. Without uttering a single word, I made love to the Scottish siren who had captured my heart and touched my soul.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Kelly
I awoke and glanced over at the clock on the nightstand. It was just past nine in the morning. I didn’t have to be anywhere, and I was determined to relish the luxury of something Cain and I didn’t have much of. Time. We had made love most of the night, and I had chosen to ignore the heartbreaking notion that soon he would leave to return to his life across the Atlantic.
We had eventually collapsed naked into his bed, wrapped around each other, at three in the morning. He had made me come every way he knew how, and I was paying for it now with the tenderness of every muscle in my body. But boy, was it worth it. I rolled onto my side and propped myself up so that I could watch him sleeping. He lay on his back with one muscular tattooed arm above his head. His face was tilted toward mine and his other arm was stretched out under my pillow.
He mumbled in his sleep, and I leaned closer to try and hear what he was saying.
“Melody… baby… love you so much… no one else.”
My stomach plummeted as if I w
ere falling, and I chewed the inside of my cheek, hoping to halt the tears that needled my eyes. I turned to climb out of bed, but as I tried to stand I was pulled back as Cain grabbed my wrist.
“Hey, sexy. Where d’you think you’re going?” His gruff morning voice turned my insides to jelly.
I sniffed and made sure to stay facing away from him. “Oh, I was just going to the bathroom.”
“Yeah? Well, hurry back, okay? I have an undercover issue you might be able to help me with.” He grabbed my other hand and slipped it beneath the duvet and curled my fingers around his erection with a chuckle. I forced a laugh and yanked my hand away, needing the distance from him and his distracting body. I stood once again and made my way out of the bedroom into the compact bathroom, where I sat on the toilet lid and dropped my head into my hands.
Not only would he be leaving me soon, but I would never fill his heart the way Melody had when she was alive… and still did after her death. That much was evident. I was kidding myself if I thought otherwise. Ten minutes later, and there was a bang on the bathroom door.
“Hey…. Hey, baby, are you okay?”
It irritated me when he referred to me with that supposed term of endearment. It irked me that I was jealous of a dead woman too, but the green-eyed monster was mostly definitely present, crouching there and laughing in my face, taunting me with ‘I told you so’.
I cleared my throat. “Y-yeah. Be out in a sec.”
“Come on, Kelly. I know there’s something wrong. Please tell me what it is. Was it the undercover thing? I… I didn’t meant to offend you. I… I guess I just didn’t want our lovemaking to be over, that’s all. And I was trying to be cute.”
Bad Company: Company of Sinners MC #1 Page 16
